by L. A. Fiore
Tilly couldn’t help the smile thinking about Gage. “Every day.”
“And by that smile, I’m guessing you weren’t sharing recipes.”
Tilly stopped pacing, leveled with her friend. “He’s amazing, Candice. It was so easy to talk to him. There was never uncomfortable silence, we always had stuff to talk about, even talking every day.”
Candice sat up straighter and urged Tilly to go on. “So what happened?”
Tilly remembered the night Luke walked in on her and Gage. Her cheeks warmed but not from embarrassment, from longing. “We had phone sex—”
Candice was off the sofa. “You did what?”
“We didn’t actually finish because Luke walked in.”
Candice didn’t blink, didn’t move for a full few seconds and then she reached for the bottle of wine and drank straight from it. “You’re telling me you were having phone sex with another man and your husband walked in on you.”
“He didn’t know what I was doing. He thought I was just entertaining myself.”
Candice’s expression shifted. “Well, damn, Tilly. That’s really kind of sad.”
“It is what it is. My marriage hasn’t been good for a long time. You know that, you’ve been telling me. I just didn’t want to hear it.”
“But you’re hearing it now.” Candice wasn’t asking.
“Yeah.”
“And it’s not me making you see it.” Candice added.
“No. I didn’t know it could be like that, Candice. That I could be so connected to someone. We met three weeks ago.”
“In person?” Candice’s eyes were wide.
“Yes.”
“Did you fuc—”
“No, but not for a lack of wanting to. We talked, we kissed, we connected on a level I’ve never had with Luke. It was the most perfect day, which made saying goodbye so hard.”
“Wait!” Candice was pacing now. “You met this man, connected, and then said goodbye?”
It hurt talking about Gage, voicing how much she missed him, but she forged on. “We said goodbye because it wasn’t just flirting, it wouldn’t have just been a fling. It was real, it was deep, and we were only at the beginning.”
“And he was okay with walking away?”
A sad little smile touched Tilly’s lips at the memory. “He was the one who walked away first, did what I couldn’t do.”
“And since then?”
“Nothing. It was a clean break.” Tilly answered absently, but then added, “He’s changed me, Candice. I’m not happy. I’m not content, but now I know what I’m missing. And I do miss him. Every fucking day.”
Candice studied her friend, saw a look in her eyes she’d never seen before, one she had never had with Luke. “Call him.”
Tilly’s head jerked to her. “What?”
“I know what you’re thinking, hating the idea of breaking up your marriage, but from where I’m standing, there’s not all that much to break up. You glow when you talk about him. There’s a light in your eyes I have never seen. I don’t know. I think if a man made me feel that, I wouldn’t let him go so easily.”
“He’s married, Candice. We both are.”
“Yeah, he is, but he’s on the other end of those texts and phone calls. He met up with you, Tilly. He might be married, but I’m guessing not happily.”
“It’s wrong.” Tilly had a hard time saying those words because deep down, she didn’t feel it was wrong. Not at all.
“So is eating ham and pineapple on pizza, but people still do it.” Candice smiled at her friend, sobered and added, “Give yourself something, give yourself this one time in your life to do what you want. Be fucking selfish for once.”
She wanted to be selfish, wanted to reach out to Gage, but it wasn’t that easy. Actions had consequences, but it wouldn’t just be her paying them if she followed her heart.
_______________
The small candles were burned down to the wick. The once chilled wine, growing warm with every passing minute. Gage sat on the bed, staring at the wall, seeing nothing. He glanced at the clock and his phone countless times. Minutes turned to hours, and with it, the anger inside built. He did his best to keep it at bay, knowing that he would be confronting her. As if his thoughts conjured her, he heard the back door open then close. He calculated her steps. Moving to the fridge, she grabbed a bottle of water. The sound of her heels bringing her to the living room, where she dropped her purse and briefcase on the chair. The sound grew closer as she made her way to the stairs, stopping by the side table to turn off the light he always left on for her. He counted her steps on the stairs then within seconds, the bedroom door opened.
His eyes went to hers, hers took in the room: low light coming from the stand lamp in the corner, candles arranged around the bedroom, casting a glow of amber ambience to the room. Her eyes moved to the bottle of unopened wine, and the two crystal wine glasses sitting next to it. The music, he had turned off over an hour ago.
Heather’s eyes settled on Gage, who sat on top of the plush light blue duvet in only his boxer briefs. “Oh my God.”
“Yeah,” Gage grumbled, his voice hoarse from lack of use.
She moved quickly toward him. Stopped at the side of the bed, dropped to her knees. “What can I do to make it up to you?” Her eyes drifted down his body, landing on his crotch. They moved back up holding a twinkle in them. “I know how,” she whispered, as her hand moved toward his waist, her fingers teasing the edge of his briefs.
“Stop.” He gripped her hand and removed it from his body. “It doesn’t work like that anymore, Heather. A blow job isn’t gonna fix the fact that we had plans to spend the night together. Just me and you and you forgot,” Gage paused and snapped, “Again.”
Heather rose quickly, kicking off her heels in anger. “What do you want me to say, sorry?”
“No!” Gage shouted and jumped up from his spot on the bed. “No, Heather, we are so fucking past saying I’m sorry. That shit doesn’t work anymore.”
Heather stopped the assault on the buttons of her blouse to throw her arms out to her sides. “I have a career, Gage. I work and—”
“So do I!” Gage bit out.
Heather tossed a hand in the air and went back to undressing. “You can come and go as you please.”
Gage didn’t know why that comment bothered him, but it did. Anger began to rise; he tried his best to keep it in check, but after weeks of trying to make an effort in repairing his marriage and finding out that he was the only one, it boiled over.
He reached out, grabbed a wine glass and threw it against the wall. The sound of shattering glass resonated through the room. Heather abruptly halted her steps and turned swiftly. “What the hell?” She screeched.
“Weeks,” Gage rumbled. “I’ve tried for weeks to work on our marriage.” He started to pace, running his hands through his hair. He stopped mid step. “But guess what, Heather, it takes two fucking people to work at it.”
“I’ve been,” she spat at him, but even the look in her eyes said she was lying.
Gage let out a disgusted chuckle. “Oh yeah. Like when you stood me up last week? Oh wait,” He let out another chuckle. “How about two days ago when you only spent an hour with me and our daughter at the movies and had to rush off to fax some fucking papers. Papers that could have waited two more fucking hours.”
“Don’t do this.” Heather ripped the blouse sleeves down her arms, throwing it to the floor.
“Do what, Heather? What in the fuck am I doing but giving you my attention?” Gage bit back, throwing his hand out at her.
Heather leaned in toward him. “You’re making me sound like a bad parent.” She hissed through clenched teeth.
Gage moved toward her. “Did you know our daughter was asked to move up to the advanced math class?”
Heather opened her mou
th, looked to the floor, but didn’t say anything.
“Exactly.” Gage spat out. “Did you know she wasn’t changing for gym?”
“Well—”
“No, you didn’t.” Gage tossed back. “Do you know why she wasn’t?”
Heather huffed, placing her hands on her hips. “No, but I guess you’re going to throw that at me, too.”
“Cause she likes a boy in her class, is embarrassed to jump around and play in sports, thinking he’s watching her.” Gage focused his eyes to the ceiling, releasing a huge breath and shaking his head.
Heather spoke lowly. “I like my job, Gage. Actually, I love it. I feel accepted, like I’m needed and—”
“No one said you couldn’t love your job, Heather. But there’s this thing called balance,” Gage said. “Look around, Heather.” Gage tossed his arms out to his sides. “You were always accepted here, fucking needed, too, but,” Gage turned, started for the door, and threw back. “That time has run the fuck out!”
Gage woke the next morning on the couch. His body screamed as he sat up, raising his arms above his head to stretch out the numerous kinks. Once he stood, Velvet jumped down from her spot on the recliner, tail wagging. “Never thought at the age of forty-six that the only female that got excited to see me would be a damn dog.” He grumbled and started toward the kitchen.
Velvet followed at his heels, jumping as she went. They made it into the kitchen. Gage eyed the note near the coffee pot but ignored it. Moving toward the back door, he let Velvet out. He moved to the note and read—I’m sorry, I am. The glass is cleaned up. I love you. Gage stared at the last three words. Her face popping into his head, and despite how he felt, he still smiled. It was another part of them he missed...they fought hard but loved harder; it was how it had always been with them.
Grabbing a cup of coffee, he settled at the island and called Dom.
“You’re late,” Dom said as a greeting.
Gage huffed. “I know. You think you can handle today?”
“Of course,” Dom said, then got quiet and asked, “You going to see—”
“No,” Gage snapped.
Dom quickly added, “Okay, just the last time you took a day off, you—”
“I know very well what I did the last time I took a day off, Dom,” Gage told him firmly.
They both got silent for a beat before Dom broke it. “You gonna talk to me?”
Gage took a gulp of the hot dark brew before he started, “Last night, Heather—”
“Oh shit,” Dom said, cutting him off. “You had a night planned with Heather.” He heard the smile in Dom’s voice. “That roll over into today?”
“Not exactly.” Gage admitted. “Didn’t happen.”
“Ohhh,” Dom replied in understanding. Being with Gage more than his own wife, Dom knew the trials and tribulations of Gage’s marriage more than his own wife did. Furthermore, knowing Gage as long as he did, he could read him better than anyone else. “How many things you break?”
“Just a glass.”
“Progress,” Dom said lowly.
“Yeah,” Gage muttered, thinking about the night two weeks ago when he and Dom were sitting in his living room having a few beers. Heather had texted him that she was going to be late, for the fourth night in a row, and Gage picked up the closest thing within arm’s reach and hurled it across the room. He followed that with his cell, but Dom was quick and caught it mid air. Dom helped him clean up the broken beer bottle without question. But the question of whether it had to do with Tilly or Heather had lingered in the air. Dom knew the answer. It was Tilly.
“Maybe the weekend away at the convention will clear your head. We can grab a few guys from the Workermens crew, head over—”
Gage spoke over Dom. “She’ll only be an hour away.”
Dom took a hefty breath and said lowly, “I know, buddy.”
Gage and Tilly had talked about a weekend with no consequences, a getaway for only them. The words weren’t directly spoken that they’d chosen each other for that getaway, but both knew who they were talking about. Fuck. That thought played too nicely inside Gage’s head.
“I’m gonna text her.” Gage told Dom as he stared at the mug in front of him, but not seeing it.
“Gage—”
“No,” He stopped him. “I can’t sit here, Dom, and keep thinking about what might have been. I need to know.”
“What if she says no?” Dom asked.
“Then I know,” Gage told him.
Dom didn’t reply. He knew his friend too well. They finished the conversation with Gage making sure Dom had the updated schedule for the day. He wasn’t off the phone with Dom for more than a minute before he brought up his and Tilly’s message thread. A thread he should have deleted weeks ago, but he never did. He glanced at the clock above the kitchen sink; her kids would be at school and her husband at work. He could call her. Not wanting to take the chance of her not being alone, he chose to just send a message.
We had talked about a weekend away, no consequences, just a weekend. I’m gonna be in Philly this weekend, Friday to Monday at the Hyatt. If you wanna take that leap, I’ll be there holding your hand. What do you say?
Gage hit send and laid his phone down in front of him. A buzzing sensation flowed through his body, one that grew stronger as time passed by. Sitting still wasn’t helping, he rose and grabbed a few treats for Velvet. Wasting the minutes that went by with tossing treats at the excited dog.
Tilly was working on a design when her phone buzzed with an incoming text. Thinking it was Kenny, her boss, since she’d just been messaging him, she flicked her gaze to her phone, and her heart stopped, seeing a message from Gage. She stared at her phone but made no move for it. So many times she thought to message him, to call him, but she worried he had been able to do what she hadn’t...move on. Her hand shook when she finally reached for her phone. Her heart now pounding as she pulled up their thread. She read the message several times, not for any other reason than he hadn’t moved on either. She knew what he was asking, knew what they were risking, but she didn’t need to think about it because he was what she wanted.
I say yes. I don’t know how I’ll get away, but I’ll figure it out. I want our weekend, too.
Gage’s cell skated across the granite as it vibrated with an incoming message. He stared at it, then moved to the dog impatiently waiting for her treat. “I’m doing the right thing, right?” He asked her; she stood from her sitting position, tail wagging, breathing heavy. “I thought so, too,” he told her and threw the small bone down the hall, Velvet taking off after it. He snatched his phone, swiped the screen and brought up her message. He read it. Read it again. Read it for the third time before his lips started to tip up on the ends, spreading into a wide smile.
Gage backed out of their messages, went to his email and brought up the confirmation email from the Hyatt. He got the information he needed before closing it down and bringing back up their thread. He typed out.
Friday, noon, room 906?
Tilly hadn’t realized she was holding her breath until his message popped up on her phone. She felt so much at once seeing those four words. She was going to see him again, have a weekend of just them. She should feel terrible at the thought, but she didn’t. She typed back.
I’ll be there.
Gage read those three words. Three words that had him feeling the best he had in three weeks. Nothing else needed to be said, so he backed out of the thread and moved to the living room with a smile on his face. He cleaned the house that day, lost in his thoughts. Cheating wasn’t his thing. Never came to his mind before. But was he really stepping out of his marriage, a marriage that had died years ago, neither putting it to rest. A loop of silence playing over and over, becoming nothing more than a rut in their lives. When Gage took a long hot shower, he slowly stroked his cock as he thought of all the things
he’d be able to do to Tilly. And when he came, it was her name that fell from his lips.
_______________
Tilly didn’t let go of her phone, couldn’t put it down. Her heart was racing, her blood rushing through her veins. She didn’t try to stand because she wasn’t sure her legs would hold her up. He wanted their weekend, in bed with no consequences. There could be, but she didn’t care. She was going to him. Her smile couldn’t be stopped.
She let her imagination roam to where she had steadfastly held it from going. Even in a marriage like hers, so incomplete and unfulfilled, she never once thought about cheating. Until Gage.
She meant what she’d said to him. She’d met the right man at the wrong time.
No one plans to cheat. It happens slowly. An awakening. People think cheaters cheat for sex, for the thrill of it, but it’s more than that. Sure, knowing how Gage had made her feel with just a kiss, the thought of their naked bodies, him over her, those brown eyes looking deeply into hers as he drove his cock into her...it was intoxicating to think about. Knowing that he would think of her first, give her pleasure before taking it for himself, that she was going to experience that in a few short days, but it wasn’t just her body that ached for him.
It was her mind and her heart.
Sometimes the grass truly is greener, the flowers sweeter, the sun brighter. The temptation to step over and savor…we’re only human.
She’d known Gage for only a few months, and yet he, understood her better than her own husband. She could have gone her whole life never knowing how it felt to truly be desired, to be craved, to be the center of someone else’s world. In a life so ordinary, having the chance at a moment of extraordinary, yeah, she felt no regrets following her heart.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Tilly hadn’t been able to eat a bite of dinner; she pushed her meatloaf around her plate, her thoughts never straying from Gage’s message. Her husband was home for a rare family dinner, but all she could think about was how she was going to get away.
Her stomach twisted in knots, working through the lies to the one that sounded the most believable, the one that gave her the excuse to meet up with another man, a man she intended on spending the weekend in bed with.
