by Fergus Hume
CHAPTER XXI
MRS PANSEY'S FESTIVAL
Once a year the archdeacon's widow discharged her social obligations bythrowing open the gaol in which she dwelt. Her festival, to which allthat Beorminster could boast of in the way of society was invited,usually took the form of an out-of-door party, as Mrs Pansey found thatshe could receive more people, and trouble herself less about theirentertainment, by filling her grounds than by crushing them into therather small reception-rooms of her house. Besides, the gardens werereally charming, and the wide-spreading green of the lawns, surroundedby ample flower-beds, now brilliant with rainbow blossoms, looked mostpicturesque when thronged with well-dressed, well-bred, well-pleasedguests. Nearly all the invitations had been accepted; firstly, becauseMrs Pansey made things unpleasant afterwards for such defiant spirits asstayed away; secondly, for the very attractive reason that the meat anddrink provided by the hostess were of the best. Thus Mrs Pansey'sentertainments were usually the most successful of the Beorminsterseason.
On this auspicious occasion the clerk of the weather had granted thehostess an especially fine day. Sunshine filled the cloudless arch ofthe blue sky; the air was warm, but tempered by a softly-blowing breeze;and the guests, to do honour at once to Mrs Pansey and the delightfulweather, wore their most becoming and coolest costumes. Pretty girlslaughed in the sunshine; matrons gossiped beneath the rustling trees;and the sober black coats of the clerical element subdued the too vividtints of the feminine frippery. The scene was animated and full ofcolour and movement, so that even Mrs Pansey's grim countenance expandedinto an unusual smile when greeting fresh arrivals. At intervals a bandplayed lively dance music; there was croquet and lawn-tennis for theyoung; iced coffee and scandal for the old. Altogether, the company,being mostly youthful and unthinking, was enjoying itself immensely, asthe chatter and laughter, and smiling and bowing amply testified.
'Altogether, I may regard it as a distinct success,' said Mrs Pansey,as, attired in her most Hamlet-like weeds, she received her guests underthe shade of a many-coloured Japanese umbrella. 'And the gardens reallylook nice.'
'The gardens of Paradise!' observed the complimentary Cargrim, who wassmirking at the elbow of his hostess.
'Don't distort Holy Writ, if--you--please!' snapped Mrs Pansey, whostill reserved the right of being disagreeable even at her ownentertainment; 'but if you do call this the Garden of Eden, I daresaythere are plenty of serpents about.'
'And many Adams and Eves!' said Dr Graham, surveying the company withhis usual cynicism; 'but I don't see Lilith, Mrs Pansey.'
'Lilith, doctor! what an improper name!'
'And what an improper person, my dear lady. Lilith was the other wife ofFather Adam.'
'How dare you, Dr Graham! the first man a bigamist! Ridiculous! Profane!Only one rib was taken out of Adam!'
'Lilith wasn't manufactured out of a rib, Mrs Pansey. The devil createdher to deceive Adam. At least, so the Rabbinists tell us!'
'Oh, those Jewish creatures!' said the lady, with a sniff. 'I don'tthink much of their opinion. What do Jews know about the Bible?'
'As much as authors generally know about their own books, I suppose,'said Graham, drily.
'We are becoming theological,' observed Cargrim, smoothly.
'Not to say blasphemous,' growled Mrs Pansey; 'at least, the doctor is,like all sceptics of his infidel profession. Remember Ananias and hislies, sir.' 'I shall rather remember Eve and her curiosity,' laughedGraham, 'and to follow so good an example let me inquire what yondervery pretty tent contains, Mrs Pansey?'
'That is a piece of Daisy's foolishness, doctor. It contains a gipsy,whom she induced me to hire for some fortune-telling rubbish.'
'Oh, how sweet! how jolly!' cried a mixed chorus of young voices. 'Areal gipsy, Mrs Pansey?' and the good lady was besieged with questions.
'She is cunning and dirty enough to be genuine, my dears. Some of youmay know her. Mother Jael!'
'Aroint thee, witch!' cried Dr Graham, 'that old beldam; oh, she can"pen dukherin" to some purpose. I have heard of her; so have thepolice.'
'What language is that?' asked Miss Whichello, who came up at thismoment with a smile and a word for all; 'it sounds like swearing.'
'I'd like to see anyone swear here,' said Mrs Pansey, grimly.
'Set your mind at rest, dear lady, I was speaking Romany--the blacklanguage--the calo jib which the gipsies brought from the East when theycame to plunder the hen-coops of Europe.'
'Do you mean to tell me that those creatures have a language of theirown?' asked Miss Whichello, disbelievingly.
'Why not? I daresay their ancestors made bricks on the plain of Shinar,and were lucky enough to gain a language without the trouble of learningit.'
'You allude to the Tower of Babel, sir!' said Mrs Pansey, with a scowl.
'Rather to the Tower of Fable, dear lady, since the whole story is amyth.'
Not caring to hear this duel of words, and rather surprised to learnthat Mother Jael was present, Cargrim slipped away at the firstopportunity to ponder over the information and consider what use hecould make of it. So the old woman still followed the bishop?--hadfollowed him even into society, and had made herself Mrs Pansey'sprofessional fortune-teller so that she might still continue to vex theeyes of her victim with the sight of her eternal red cloak. Dr Pendlewas at that very moment walking amongst the guests, with his youngestson by his side, and appeared to be more cheerful and more like hisformer self than he had been for some time. Apparently he was as yetignorant that Mother Jael was in his immediate vicinity; but Cargrimdetermined that he should be warned of her presence as speedily aspossible, and be lured into having an interview with her so that hisscheming chaplain might see what would come of the meeting. Also Cargrimresolved to see the old gipsy himself and renew the conversation whichshe had broken off when she had thieved his gold. In one way or anotherhe foresaw that it would be absolutely necessary to force the woman intomaking some definite statement either inculpating or exonerating thebishop in respect of Jentham's death. Therefore, having come to thisconclusion, Cargrim strolled watchfully through the merry crowd. It washis purpose to inform Dr Pendle that Mother Jael was telling fortunes inthe gaily-striped tent, and his determination to bring--if possible--theprelate into contact with the old hag. From such a meeting artful MrCargrim hoped to gather some useful information from the conversationand behaviour of the pair.
Unfortunately Cargrim was impeded in the execution of this scheme fromthe fact of his remarkable popularity. He could not take two stepswithout being addressed by one or more of his lady admirers; andalthough he saw the bishop no great distance away, he could not reachhim by reason of the detaining sirens. As gracefully as possible heeluded their snares, but when confronted by Daisy Norsham hanging on thearm of Dean Alder, he almost gave up hope of reaching his goal. Therewas but little chance of escape from Daisy and her small talk. Moreover,she was rather bored by the instructive conversation of the ancientparson, and wanted to attach herself to some younger and more frivolousman. Cupid in cap and gown and spectacles is a decidedly prosy divinity.
'Oh, dear Mr Cargrim!' cried the gushing Daisy, 'is it really you? Oh,how very sweet of you to come to-day! And what is the very latest newsof poor, dear Mrs Pendle?'
'I believe the Nauheim baths are doing her a great deal of good, MissNorsham. If you will excuse--'
'Nauheim!' croaked the dean, with a dry cough, 'is unknown to me save asa geographical expression, but the town of Baden-Baden, formally calledAurelia Aquensis, was much frequented by the Romans on account of itssalubrious and health-giving springs. I may also instance Aachen,vulgarly termed Aix-la-Chapelle, but known to the Latins as Aquisgranumor--'
'How interesting!' interrupted Daisy, cutting short this Stream ofinformation. 'You do seem to know everything, Mr Dean. The only Germanwatering-place I have been to is Wiesbaden, where the doctors made meget up at five o'clock to drink the waters. And fancy, Mr Cargrim, aband played at the Kochbrunnen at seven in the morn
ing. Did you everhear anything so horrid?'
'Music at so early an hour would be trying, Miss Norsham!'
'Aqua Mattiacae was the Roman appellation of Wiesbaden,' murmured DrAlder, twiddling his eye-glass. 'I hear on good medical authority thatthe waters are most beneficial to renovate health and arrest decay. Ishould advise his lordship, the bishop, to visit the springs, for oflate I have noticed that he appears to be sadly out of sorts.'
'He is looking much better to-day,' observed the chaplain, with a glanceat the bishop, who was now conversing with Miss Whichello.
'Oh, the poor, dear bishop should have his fortune told by Mother Jael.'
'That would hardly be in keeping with his exalted position, MissNorsham.'
'Oh, really, I don't see that it is so very dreadful,' cried Daisy, withone of her silvery peals of artificial laughter, 'and it's only fun.Mother Jael might tell him if he was going to be ill or not, you know,and he could take medicine if he was. Besides, she does tell the truth;oh, really, it's too awful what she knew about me. But I'm glad to sayshe prophesied a lovely future.'
'Marriage and money, I presume.'
'Well, you are clever, Mr Cargrim; that is just the fortune she told me.How did you guess? I'm to meet my future husband here; he is to be richand adore me, and I'm to be very, very happy.' 'I am sure so charming ayoung lady deserves to be,' said Cargrim, bowing.
'Siderum regina bicornis audi, Luna puellas,' quoted Mr Dean, with aside glance at the radiant Daisy; and if that confident lady hadunderstood Latin, she would have judged from this satirical quotationthat Dr Alder was not so subjugated by her charms as to contemplatematrimony. But being ignorant, she was--in accordance with theproverb--blissful, and babbled on with a never-failing stream of smalltalk, which was at times momentarily obstructed by the heavy masses ofinformation cast into it by the dean.
Leaving this would-be May and wary old December to their unequalflirtation, Cargrim again attempted to reach the bishop, but wascaptured by Miss Tancred, much to his disgust. She entertained him witha long and minute account of her rheumatic pains and the means by whichshe hoped to cure them. Held thus as firmly as the wedding guest was bythe Ancient Mariner, Cargrim lost the chance of hearing a veryinteresting conversation between Miss Whichello and the bishop; but,from the clouded brow of Dr Pendle, he saw that something was wrong, andchafed at his enforced detention. Nevertheless, Miss Tancred kept himbeside her until she exhausted her trickle of small talk. It took allCargrim's tact and politeness and Christianity to endure patiently hergabble.
'Yes, bishop,' Miss Whichello was saying, with some annoyance, 'your sonhas admired my niece for some considerable time. Lately they becameengaged, but I refused to give my consent until your sanction andapproval had been obtained.'
'George has said nothing to me on the subject,' replied Dr Pendle, in avexed tone. 'Yet he should certainly have done so before speaking toyour niece.'
'No doubt! but unfortunately young men's heads do not always guide theirhearts. Still, Captain Pendle promised me to tell you all during hispresent visit to Beorminster. And, of course, both Mrs Pendle and yourdaughter Lucy know of his love for Mab.'
'It would appear that I am the sole person ignorant of the engagement,Miss Whichello.'
'It was not with my consent that you were kept in ignorance, bishop. ButI really do not see why you should discourage the match. You can see foryourself that they make a handsome pair.'
Dr Pendle cast an angry look towards the end of the lawn, where Georgeand Mab were talking earnestly together.
'I don't deny their physical suitability,' he said severely, 'but morethan good looks are needed to make a happy marriage.'
'Am I to understand that you disapprove of my niece?' cried the littleold lady, drawing herself up.
'By no means; by no means; how can you think me so wanting in courtesy?But I must confess that I desire my son to make a good match.'
'You should rather wish him to get a good wife,' retorted MissWhichello, who was becoming annoyed. 'But if it is fortune you desire, Ican set your mind at rest on that point. Mab will inherit my money whenI die; and should she marry Captain Pendle during my lifetime, I shallallow the young couple a thousand a year.'
'A thousand a year, Miss Whichello!'
'Yes! and more if necessary. Let me tell you, bishop, I am much betteroff than people think.'
The bishop, rather nonplussed, looked down at his neat boots and verybecoming gaiters. 'I am not so worldly-minded as you infer, MissWhichello,' said he, mildly; 'and did George desire to marry a poorgirl, I have enough money of my own to humour his whim. But if his heartis set on making Miss Arden his wife, I should like--if you will pardonmy candour--to know more about the young lady.'
'Mab is the best and most charming girl in the world,' said the littleJennie Wren, pale, and a trifle nervous.
'I can see that for myself. You misunderstand me, Miss Whichello, so Imust speak more explicitly. Who is Miss Arden?'
'She is my niece,' replied Miss Whichello, with trembling dignity. 'Theonly child of my poor sister, who died when Mab was an infant in arms.'
'Quite so!' assented the bishop, with a nod. 'I have always understoodsuch to be the case. But--er--Mr Arden?'
'Mr Arden!' faltered the old lady, turning her face from the company,that its pallor and anxiety might not be seen.
'Her father! is he alive?'
'No!' cried Miss Whichello, shaking her head. 'He died long, long ago.'
'Who was he?'
'A--a--a gentleman!--a gentleman of independent fortune.'
Dr Pendle bit his nether lip and looked embarrassed. 'Miss Whichello,'he said at length, in a hesitating tone, 'your niece is a charming younglady, and, so far as she herself is concerned, is quite fit to becomethe wife of my son George.'
'I should think so indeed!' cried the little lady, with buckramcivility.
'But,' continued the bishop, with emphasis, 'I have heard rumours abouther parentage which do not satisfy me. Whether these are true or not isbest known to yourself, Miss Whichello; but before consenting to theengagement you speak of, I should like to be fully informed on thepoint.'
'To what rumours does your lordship refer?' asked Miss Whichello, verypale-faced, but very quiet.
'This is neither the time nor place to inform you,' said the bishop,hastily; 'I see Mr Cargrim advancing. On another occasion, MissWhichello, we shall talk about the matter.'
As the chaplain, with three or four young ladies, including MissNorsham, was bearing down on the bishop, Miss Whichello recognised thejustice of his speech, and not feeling equal to talk frivolity, shehastily retreated and ran into the house to fight down her emotion. Whatthe poor little woman felt was known only to herself; but she foresawthat the course of true love, so far as it concerned George and Mab, wasnot likely to run smooth. Still, she put a brave face on it and hopedfor the best.
In the meantime, Bishop Pendle was enveloped in a whirl of petticoats,as Cargrim's Amazonian escort, prompted by the chaplain, was insistingthat he should have his fortune told by Mother Jael. The bishop lookedperturbed on hearing that his red-cloaked phantom was so close at hand,but he managed to keep his countenance, and laughingly refused to complywith the demand of the ladies.
'Think of what the newspapers would say,' he urged, 'if a bishop were toconsult this Witch of Endor.'
'Oh, but really, it is only a joke!'
'A dignitary of the Church shouldn't joke, Miss Norsham.'
'Why not, your lordship?' put in Cargrim, amiably. 'I have heard thatRichelieu played with a kitten.'
'I am not Richelieu,' replied Dr Pendle, drily, 'nor is Mother Jael akitten.'
'It's for a charity, bishop,' said Daisy, imploringly. 'I pay MotherJael for the day, and give the rest to Mrs Pansey's Home for servantsout of work.'
'Oh, for a charity,' repeated Dr Pendle, smiling; 'that puts quite adifferent complexion on the question. What do you say, Mr Cargrim?'
'I don't think that your lordship can r
efuse the prayer of thesecharming young ladies,' replied the chaplain, obsequiously.
Now, the bishop really wished to see Mother Jael in order to learn whyshe haunted him so persistently; and as she had always vanishedheretofore, he thought that the present would be a very good time tocatch her. He therefore humoured the joke of fortune-telling for his ownsatisfaction, and explained as much to the expectant company.
'Well, well, young ladies,' said he, good-naturedly, 'I suppose I mustconsent to be victimised if only to further the charitable purposes ofMrs Pansey. Where dwells the sybil?'
'In this tent! This way, your lordship!'
Dr Pendle advanced towards the gaily-striped tent, smiling broadly, andwith a playful shake of the head at the laughing nymphs around, heinvaded the privacy of Mother Jael. With a sigh of relief at havingaccomplished his purpose, Cargrim let fall the flap which he had held upfor the bishop's entry, and turned away, rubbing his hands. His aim wasattained. It now remained to be seen what would come of the meetingbetween bishop and gipsy.
