by Molly E. Lee
“Yeah. Why?”
She arched a brow at me. “You look…”
“Tired,” I filled in for her. “I was up late.”
“And that’s different from any other day?” she teased.
I forced a laugh. “Right. Later than usual.”
“Did Dean have anything to do with that?” She nudged me, and I was grateful that the topic had shifted from the website calling for my attention.
I wanted to tell her about it. Wanted her to be there to go through this massive project with me. But I couldn’t risk her involvement. I’d locked the site up so well I didn’t think anyone would ever be able to trace it, but still. I was taking a big enough risk pulling something like this at Wilmont, over Principal Tanner. Plus, I’d promised Dean I wouldn’t tell anyone, and I expected him to do the same. Fewer people involved to get burned if we got caught.
Which I had no intention of doing.
Ever.
Besides, no one could even write in.
“Yes,” I finally admitted. “We have a bet between us. I was working on my end of it.” I sighed. It felt good to at least tell her a half truth.
“Ohh,” she said over the roaring crowd. Wilmont had just scored. “I love this so much! What are the terms?”
I pressed my lips into a line, shaking my head. “I’m sworn to secrecy.”
She stomped her foot. “That is so unfair!”
“It’s techy stuff.” I laughed, the tension breaking within me. “It would bore you.”
“Anything with you and Dean working together or against each other or whatever is so not boring.”
“Why are you so obsessed with the time I spend with him?”
“Because,” she said. “He’s a good guy. And you deserve to be around a good guy who gets all that intricate wiring you have tangled in your pretty little head.”
I grinned, rolling my eyes.
We’d thought Brandon was a good guy, too.
A cold chill raced down my spine. The same deep iciness that built a wall around my heart, forbidding me from even thinking of Dean that way.
“You really can’t tell me?” she asked.
“No. It’s no big deal. Just something between us.”
A massive grin slid over her face. “Sounds romantic.”
“Platonic. Promise. He’s a friend. That’s all.”
A gorgeous, delicious-smelling friend. And this challenge was bringing us closer, despite being in opposition. Maybe it would be good for me. To get to know him beyond the halls of Wilmont, beyond our normal exchange of hacker-only info. It could be nice…having him as a friend.
Something I’d never really entertained before, because Brandon dominated all my free time, ensuring I barely had time to hack, let alone get closer with someone else.
“Fine,” she said, her tone completely understanding. “That’s a start, anyway.” She winked at me, her focus returning to Jake on the field.
I didn’t see the plays or touchdowns. I didn’t hear the cheers of the crowd around me. I was in my head, contemplating my next step with the website, wondering how many hits Sabrina’s post had gotten me, wishing I could ditch the game and check but at the same time grateful that I couldn’t.
Because once I did, it would be real. More real than it lighting up my best friend’s cell phone. More real than Sabrina telling thousands about it.
I wasn’t ready.
But I had to be.
“Yay!” Hannah clapped and cheered as the game ended, Wilmont winning. “Come on!” She clutched my wrist and propelled me down the steps. She shoved her way through the bodies doing the same thing, pushing us through the pack and to the fence that lined the field.
I sucked in a breath when we cleared the crowd, the pressure easing on my lungs at being pinned among so many people. The fence was less packed, the mass of students heading toward the exit in drones.
“Great game, Jake!” Hannah called as he walked to the other side of the fence, his helmet tucked underneath his arm.
“Thanks, babe,” he said.
Sweat dripped down his golden-brown skin, a clear line of dirt showing exactly where his helmet had been. He leaned down, planting a deep, long kiss onto Hannah’s lips, and the girl didn’t flinch at the ick of the game all over him. No, she snaked her fingers around his neck, soaking her nails in the dripping black hair at the base of his neck, tugging him closer. If the fence hadn’t been between them…
I shuddered and turned my head the opposite direction. I’d seen them embrace like this plenty of times—my house was one of the only places they could be fully relaxed and themselves. Hannah’s parents weren’t the strictest, but there was one issue they’d never budge on and that was sex before marriage. But it didn’t mean I enjoyed being the third wheel to their true-love show.
It hadn’t always been like this. For a while I’d been a fourth. Smiling and congratulating just like Hannah—
“Amber.”
My spine turned into a steel rod while my legs felt like Jell-O.
I swallowed a mouthful of acid, turning to set eyes on Brandon. He brushed past Jake, who was still completely tangled up in Hannah, their PDA totally concealed by the bustling crowd still leaving the stadium.
“Brandon.” His name passed my lips quietly, timidly, where I’d intended it to be sharper than a razor. I was stronger than this, damn it. Why did one look at his dark eyes, muscles, and shiny, buzzed-black hair turn me into a weak…victim?
He shifted his helmet under his arm, stopping at the fence right in front of me. His eyes roamed up and down my body. I was suddenly conscious of the rips in my new jeans and the tiny strips of skin they exposed.
I took one step back, clutching the strap of my bag.
“Didn’t think you’d show,” he said, his tone smooth, casual, like our breakup never happened. Like I wasn’t glaring at him as if I could mentally throw him across the football field.
“I’m here for Jake.”
Brandon cut his eyes to my best friend before returning to me. “See they appreciate it.”
I rolled my eyes—anger helped loosen the tight air in my lungs. “What do you want?” Why was he here? Why wasn’t he having a post-game celebration with his new girl? I’d heard it was Sabrina, but that could just be a rumor. It was hard to tell anymore, especially since I’d stopped paying attention.
“Why does it have to be like that?” he asked, and he had the audacity to genuinely look confused. Like I should be pumped about him talking to me again.
You know why.
I furrowed my brow.
He sighed, shifting his weight. “Just thought I’d say hi,” he said, shrugging. “You coming to Sabrina’s party after?” He motioned toward the exit.
“That’d be a no,” I said, a dark laugh on the end of it.
“We used to have fun.” He narrowed his eyes. “You used to be fun.” He shook his head. “Now you’re just…”
I swallowed the rock in my throat.
Whatever I am, it’s because of you.
“Brandon?” Jake snapped, looking like he only now realized he was next to him.
Hannah was at my side in an instant, dagger-glares and claws bared.
Brandon chuckled, holding up his hands—one with his helmet—as he backed away from the fence. “Yeah, man,” he said, eyeing Jake. “I get it.” He planted his dark eyes on mine. “Was just saying hi to a friend.”
“Don’t,” Jake said, his tone sharp and everything I’d wished mine could be.
Brandon huffed, spun on his heels, and jogged toward the exit.
“Sorry,” Hannah said. “You could’ve said something.”
“No use. He doesn’t merit the energy.” I wished my heart would believe that, be as strong as that thought. “But,” I said, glancing between them, “thanks.”
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Jake flashed those white teeth. “I’ve always got your back.”
Hannah nodded her agreement, rubbing her hand up and down my back.
I sighed, the internal shaking subsiding with my tribe surrounding me. “That’s more comforting than you know,” I said, grinning softly. After a silent shared look between Jake and Hannah—their own brand of communicating that was perfected over years of being together—I stepped out of Hannah’s touch. “I’ve really got to crash,” I said. “My brain is going fuzzy.”
“Oh no,” Hannah said. “We all know that leads to binging on Oreos and fail-YouTube-videos.” She laughed, jerking her head toward the exit. “Let’s get out of here.”
“You don’t know me.”
She scoffed. “Yeah, right.” She glanced at Jake. “I’ll text you later.” She blew him a kiss and we fell in with the last stragglers of the crowd leaving.
I hugged her outside my car, silently siphoning her happiness and support to wash away the bad taste that talking to Brandon had left in my mouth.
“See you tomorrow,” I said, sinking behind the wheel.
As I watched her walk to her car parked a few spaces down, I sucked in a sharp breath. I didn’t have time to dwell on my past or Brandon’s need to seek me out tonight. I had a challenge to cultivate, and hopefully, classmates to help.
I pulled out of the parking lot, wondering just how I’d go about doing that, and hoping like hell I’d be enough.
For once.
I knew I needed sleep, that I needed to unplug and recharge. But after seeing Sabrina’s post, I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist checking the site when I got home. A few more hours awake wouldn’t kill me.
So, instead of heading straight home, I drove toward my favorite taco shop to grab some much-needed fuel.
Chapter Eight
Dean
“What brings you out here?” Tessa asked from behind the counter, her bright yellow shirt clashing with her dark hair.
“I brought you a treat,” I said, handing her the grande iced mocha I’d picked up on my way over.
She eyed the drink, then me. “Why?”
I tilted my head. “Act like I don’t do this on the reg.”
“Thanks!” She chuckled, her suspicions clearing as she took the drink. “I so needed it. We just finished a major rush.”
I scanned the quaint taco shop, noting the packed tables. It was a laid-back place, its regular customers that of the Wilmont variety. Tessa had worked here for a year now, and I made sure to stop by randomly sometimes when she had a shift—check up on my baby sister and free tacos. Win, win.
She slurped the drink, her eyes rolling back in her head for a moment before she set it behind the counter. “So. Good.” She glanced behind me, her customer-service smile dominating her face. “What can I get you?”
I stepped to the side, not wanting to be in the customer’s way.
“Number four. To go, please.”
Amber’s voice had me whirling around like I was hooked on a magnet she controlled. “Pixie,” I said, eyeing her. “Shouldn’t you be in bed?”
That beautiful blush I’d seen earlier flushed her cheeks, but she sharpened her features.
I smirked, loving the way she could be soft and fierce at the same time. Remembering our earlier chat, I cleared my throat and dropped the flirt that came automatically. “I mean,” I said, stepping closer to her, “haven’t you been running full-speed all day on only a few hours?”
“Haven’t you?” she challenged.
“Yes,” I said.
“And yet you’re allowed to be here and I’m not?” There was a tease in her tone, but I held my hands up.
“Not what I meant.”
She popped her hip to the side, which only drew my attention to the sexy black jeans she wore tucked into a pair of silver Converse. I hadn’t seen her outside of school that much, but when I did? Damn, I couldn’t get enough of those glimpses of the real her—the pixie not buried underneath the school’s uniform.
“You seem to do that a lot,” she said, and I snapped my eyes back up to hers.
“What?”
“Say one thing and mean another.”
I shook my head. “Now you’re just twisting things.”
She shrugged. “I call it how I see it.”
“That’s not—”
“Dean,” Tessa cut me off. “Can you let the girl get her food on?”
I cut my sister a glare before glancing back at Amber. “Of course,” I said. “I’ll have what she’s having, but make the order for here.”
Amber smiled before forcing those pink lips into a line. “I’ve got to get home.”
“Why?” I cocked a brow at her. “Working late again in an attempt to beat me?”
Tessa hissed. “You didn’t get into a bet with him, did you?” she asked Amber, pity in her eyes.
Amber tipped her chin, her gaze churning with a sliver of light. Something I only now realized hadn’t been present for the past five minutes.
“Where did you come from?” I asked before she could answer my sister.
She tilted her head, ignoring me. “Yes, I did,” she said to Tessa. “And I’m going to kick his ass.” The bite in her tone made my insides all kinds of hot, and I laughed.
Tessa grinned, reaching over the counter to give Amber a fist bump. “Nice,” she said. “If there’s anything I can help with to take him down, let me know.” She leaned farther over, lowering her voice. “I’ve got tons of dirt on him.”
I gaped at her. “I’ll take that mocha back now.”
“No take-backs.” She punched in our orders.
I rolled my eyes, returning focus to Amber, who was pulling out her wallet. “Stop,” I said. “I’ve got this.”
“I told you earlier, flattery won’t throw me off my game.”
“No games. I just want to buy you some food. The least you can do is sit and eat with me.”
She chewed on the corner of her lip, a habit I wasn’t even sure she was aware of. I held my breath, wondering why whatever her answer would be was so damn important to me. I’d see her tomorrow. We’d already established that. So why was I dying for another hour?
Maybe it’s that look in her eyes.
That cold, distant look that she’d had when I’d first turned around. Like she’d just come from a horror film and it had sunk beneath her skin.
I stepped even closer, watching the debate in her eyes. “Friends can share tacos, right?”
Something clicked behind those eyes when I said the word friends, and I smiled softly at her. She’d told me earlier she’d sworn off guys, relationships, all of it. And I knew that had everything to do with Brandon, I just didn’t know the circumstances. Brandon was an okay guy, I guess. If you liked jocks who played the jerk card too often and thought burping the alphabet was a fun pastime. Or maybe that was just the dude I knew from years of gym classes together. Either way, she’d seemed happy enough with him all last year…but now something haunted her.
And I wanted to know what.
Again, that undeniable sensation to break past the barrier we’d held ourselves at in the past tugged at my core, begging me to get closer.
As friends.
Yes. Absolutely. Just friends.
The sharp twist in my gut thinking the word had me wanting to take back my offer and bolt through the exit, but I told myself to not be a coward.
“Okay,” she finally agreed, her voice so small I almost didn’t hear it.
Tessa slid two trays piled high with four tacos, chips and salsa, and guac toward us. I grabbed them before Amber could change her mind and headed toward a free booth tucked in the back corner near the windows. Setting the trays down, I motioned for her to take a seat while I grabbed the empty cups.
I held one up. “Green tea?
”
She smiled. “Yes, please.”
By the time I got back from filling up our drinks, Amber was already halfway through one brisket taco, the queso fresco dropping to the paper beneath her.
She licked some stray pico off her lips as I sat down, and my breath caught for a few seconds.
This girl. I loved how she wasn’t afraid to be herself and didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought.
Hot.
Friends.
I stopped staring at her like she held the key to every secret I wanted to know and handed her the drink.
“Thanks,” she said. “For this, too.” She scooped up her half-eaten taco and finished it off. “I really needed the fuel.”
“Same,” I said. “It’s why I stopped here.”
“I figured you were just checking up on your baby sister,” she said.
I glanced over my shoulder toward the counter where Tessa cleaned the surface, since there were no more customers. I turned back around and grabbed my own taco. “Don’t tell her that,” I said before chomping into the tortilla.
“Never,” she said, chuckling. “I think it’s cute.”
I raised my brows at her mid-bite.
“I’m an only child.” She scooped up her second taco. “The idea of having a sibling, someone bound by blood to have your back…” Her eyes trailed to the side, that same cold, distant gaze threatening to come back. “It’d be nice.”
I swallowed my bite a little too hard.
“Where did you come from?” I asked again.
She laughed, setting down her taco to take a fast drink of tea. “You sound like a vampire.”
“What?” I nearly choked on my Coke.
“True Blood,” she said like that would explain everything. “The vamps are always asking the beautiful girl what she is. Where she came from.” Her eyes widened, that blush coming back. “Not that I’m calling myself beautiful—”
Instinctively, I reached across the table, gently touching her wrist to cut off her ramble. “It’s okay,” I said, and she took a breath. She eyed my hand, her chest rising and falling a little too fast. I withdrew it, occupying my fingers with another taco even though I itched to feel her soft skin again. “You are,” I said. “By the way.” I took a massive bite, shoveling the avocado-pork gold into my mouth before I could say anything else stupid.
