by Dannika Dark
“I understand that pain more than you know. What happened to your mate?”
“I suppose he’s still alive somewhere. They went to war with my father’s pack, and I walked away. My father betrayed me. My mate betrayed me. I spent years grieving, and when all that rage and sorrow went away, I felt nothing. I had nothing. My life was nothing… until I met Viktor. He needed a scout, and I was the best.” Blue quickly wiped her face, stood up, and stalked off.
Why the hell did I tell him all that? she thought. I’ve spent years hiding my past, and now I spill my feelings all over the place in front of a virtual stranger? What is wrong with me?
She finally stopped near an old tree, Matteo’s footsteps just behind her. “Nobody tells you that losing a child is like being an amputee. You can live without your arm, but you’re never whole again. I lost both my arms. Sometimes I forget about them, and then I feel guilty for forgetting.”
“I know that feeling. I wept every day for my family. One day I realized they hadn’t crossed my mind, and I wept from the guilt of forgetting. The guilt of enjoying a day without them.”
“How did you get used to not having them in this world?”
Matteo furrowed his brow. “I haven’t. Sometimes it comforts me to know that they’re still alive, just in a different time. I’m caught in the present, and they’re still in the past. But maybe we exist simultaneously.”
“Men are so much better compartmentalizing their pain.” Blue rested her back against the tree trunk. “I can’t figure out what it was all for. Why did I bring those beautiful boys into this world, only to watch them die? What was the purpose? That’s why I don’t believe in love, Matteo. Not the way you romanticize it. My own father betrayed me. My mate loved his pride more than his own child. And my love wasn’t enough to save my sons.”
He reached up and gripped the bough above his head. “It must have been hard to leave everything you knew. Not just the loss of your children but your entire community.”
“I might look young, but I’m an eighty-five-year-old Shifter. I’ve had a lot of time to adjust.”
“You’re just a toddler,” he said with a lazy smile.
Blue dried her eyes on her sleeve, grateful for the shift in topic. “And how old are you?”
“Six hundred. I don’t know the exact years, but that’s about right.”
She strolled past him. “Old man.”
“Dignified.”
“Maybe you should find someone your own age.”
He chuckled softly. “Are you ashamed to be seen with me?”
“Ashamed to be seen with a man who never bathes and wears a mop on his head? Never.”
“If I cut my hair, I cut my chances of wooing you.”
“That’s superstition.”
“Say what you will, but my people believe it.”
“You must have courted a lot of women judging by the length of your mane.”
Matteo suddenly twisted her into his arms. “I haven’t stopped thinking about our kiss. Day and night. No matter what I do, where I go, all I can taste are your sweet lips.”
When he leaned down, Blue panicked and stepped back.
Matteo still clutched her hands. “Give me a chance. I’ll love our children no matter what Breed they are—even if they’re human.”
“I don’t want a family.”
“But if you mated again, what would you want? I can give you so much love.”
Blue shook her head. “I don’t care about love. I would just want a man with integrity—someone who’s wise and always does the right thing. Someone who would never betray me. A noble man who lifts himself up in this world without stepping on others or becoming a victim of greed. A man who doesn’t run from his problems.”
Matteo’s grip loosened until their hands parted. “I can be those things. I can try.”
“Your wounds are still fresh, and somehow you think I can erase all that. You’re where I was decades ago, and you have a long way to go before you figure out your purpose. Some people aren’t meant to have all the happiness in the world. Maybe the best we can do is give it to others. You have a noble job guiding children to that safe haven, and maybe that’ll heal your wounds.”
Matteo clasped his hands together. “And the girl you saved, does that lessen your pain?”
Blue didn’t have an answer for that.
“Which one gives you more peace: the lives you save or the lives you take?” he asked.
“I don’t know. That’s my honest answer. I’m glad the girl’s with us, even though it’s temporary. Her pack shared the children.”
Matteo’s upper fangs descended. “They what?”
“Don’t flip your switch on me. This is the stuff I deal with every day, and maybe it does give me a little pleasure to take out criminals who might otherwise get away with it.”
“That pack can’t be allowed to exist.”
“It’s not up to me. We can’t keep the girl. I know we’ve got a big mansion, but this isn’t a place for kids. I don’t know what’ll happen.”
“Someone has to save the children. Do you want me to take the children to West Virginia?”
Though tempted, Blue shook her head. “They don’t belong there. That’s a place for Potentials. A young wolf needs a family.”
“What happens to girls like her?”
Blue paced. “They go to an orphanage. She’d never survive that place. They take care of them, but a Shifter needs a special kind of nurturing. I don’t know. I guess we’ll see what happens. Look, I have to go. If you know what’s best, you’ll go home. Buy some clothes, trim up those split ends. Maybe you’ll find yourself a girl, or maybe you won’t. But don’t give up on guiding those kids. Your job is invaluable.”
Blue unlaced the front of her gown and let it drop to her ankles. Matteo was the first one who had seen her scars, and he might be the last man who saw them. Part of her was curious what a man’s reaction would be. She wished she could ignore the hideous gashes, but they were a huge part of her now, and there was no avoiding how this would continually impact her life in ways she couldn’t predict.
His jaw slackened, and though he turned his head as if to look away, his eyes softened as he gazed upon her body. She felt him admiring her breasts, her shapely hips, and her long legs. The initial look of surprise immediately vaporized, replaced with a look she was familiar with—desire.
She stepped out of her gown. “Why is it people are so shocked by nudity?”
“You took me off guard.”
Blue grinned. “Looks like I’ve found a way to shut you up.”
Matteo bowed. “Feel free to shut me up anytime, my lady.”
With that, Blue raised her arms and flew away.
Chapter 18
Blue and I had temporarily put our case on hold. After a few more days of questioning Shifters, Viktor wanted everyone to drop what they were doing to perform a special rescue mission taking down a Shifter pack. We didn’t have nor seek approval by the Shifter Council or higher authority; Viktor had taken it upon himself to collect as much evidence against these devils and rescue the children. We mostly avoided talking about it because of the grim nature, and we didn’t want Claude flipping his switch every five minutes. When Viktor finally called us to go, we didn’t have a meeting. We understood what was expected of us.
“I still don’t understand why you wouldn’t report them first,” Gem said from the back of the van. “We have so much evidence.”
Christian and I exchanged looks by the rear door before looking at Viktor, who was driving. Everyone else had taken a spot in the back—all but Claude, who was trailing behind us in a rented van. We needed something to transport the kids.
Viktor flicked a glance at us in the rearview mirror. “Men like this are crafty. If we reported them first, they might somehow find out and move the children elsewhere. These packs trade children.”
“Are you sure they’re all involved?” Gem pressed. “I don’t want to kill anyone who’
s innocent.”
“Trust me, they’re all involved,” Blue said, arms folded. “I had a long talk with Marelle this morning, and she told me everything. It’s all of them. They use the three women for breeding, and the packs trade those children to keep the mothers separated from them. She heard them mention other states, so it seems like they don’t want them living in the same area.”
Gem looked down at her black shoes. “Oh, that’s horrible.”
Blue tied her hair into a bun. “The women were once kids in their pack. These guys like it that way because they don’t have to worry about them blowing the whistle. It’s the only life they’ve known, and most of them are probably too scared. Who knows? Maybe they’re just brainwashed and think it’s how everyone lives.”
I gripped the bench when we hit a hard bump. “Besides that, do you think jail is a fair punishment? And what if someone lets them out?”
Shepherd returned a knife to the holster on his chest. “Last chance if anyone wants a firearm. I’m not gonna have time to load it when we get there.”
Niko gripped the pommels of his katanas. “I’m good.”
Wyatt looked down at his all-black outfit. “I need one.”
“Horseshit. You’ve got five, and you probably won’t use a damn thing. I’m all out of holsters unless you want to shove it up your ass.”
Wyatt tugged on his black knit hat. “I was under the impression that my commando days were over, General Patton.”
Viktor snapped his fingers. “I need everyone on this mission. There are twenty-five of them.”
“Twenty-three,” Blue said. “We took out two, remember?”
“Spasibo. Twenty-three.”
“Maybe we should start having a meeting before a raid,” I suggested. “Just to get all the questions out of the way.”
Christian barked out a laugh. “We would never be able to leave, and Spooky would find a way to weasel out of it.”
Wyatt glowered. “Rollergirl and I aren’t meant for this kind of Rambo stuff.”
Gem straightened her back. “Speak for yourself.”
Wyatt crossed his feet at the ankles. “I tag along when you need a professional to hack computers and gather evidence. I did that already. My job is done. But here I am, sitting in a van with guns strapped to my crotch. You know I can’t kill anyone. That’s the worst thing a Gravewalker can do.” He swung his gaze to the space next to him. “Nobody asked the freshy. Go find a light to jump in.”
I checked the push daggers on my belt, inside my leather coat, and strapped to my hip. I also had a stake inside a fitted loop in my jacket. Shifters couldn’t heal if impaled—another reason Shepherd brought guns. Sometimes bullets went through, but sometimes they didn’t.
The van stopped, and Viktor turned off the engine.
It was quiet enough you could hear a pin drop. Was it possible to sneak up on a wolf pack?
As if reading my mind, Viktor twisted around in his seat. “A pack won’t flee on their territory, especially if they have something more than land to protect. Remember what I said earlier: no one leaves the building except the children. I want each of you working with your partner.”
“Swell,” Shepherd grumbled.
I met eyes with Christian. Something about going into a fight filled me with arousal, and I could see the same amorous look in his eyes.
“Remember what we are here for,” Viktor stressed.
Shepherd stood. When he neared the back door, he looked between Christian and me. “Whenever you two are finished eye fucking…”
Christian winked and popped open the rear door. “After you.”
Claude waited outside, also dressed in black. His golden locks were tucked inside a black knit hat. Wyatt stuck out more than the rest of us since Have a Nice Afterlife was printed on the front of his shirt.
Gem leaped out of the van, her chunky boots crunching on the concrete. There was an air of confidence about her I hadn’t seen before on one of these missions.
I noticed my surroundings—concrete roads, dilapidated buildings, and a stop sign bent in half. “I thought we were going to their house?”
“We’re here.” Blue jumped out of the van next. “This pack lives in the city.”
“I thought packs liked woods and shit.”
“Not every pack is approved for Shifter land, so they buy up large apartment buildings or abandoned warehouses. Wyatt couldn’t find the blueprints on this place; that’s why we didn’t have a meeting. There’s not much to discuss. Here we are.”
Wyatt stepped out and twisted his ankle. He leaned down, gripping his leg. “It’s not that I couldn’t find it. The blueprints weren’t in the public records. Someone deleted them. Ow…”
Viktor joined us. “Cowards erase their existence so they are off radar.”
Christian peered around the van. “You’re not concerned they’ll see us?”
“Nyet. Shepherd scouted the building yesterday.”
Shepherd folded his muscular arms. “They only have a few windows in the back, and they’re up high. It’s a two-story warehouse. They welded shut all the doors. The only way in and out is through a garage door.”
“That’s how Niko and I went in,” Blue explained. “We parked just inside, and I guess that’s when the girl snuck into the trunk. There’s a staircase that goes to the upper level and a walkway that takes you through the building. It’s an open plan, like a running track. You can see the entire first floor over the railing. We didn’t get the full tour, so I don’t know where they keep the kids or if they have a bazooka. We’re all going in blind.”
“Who volunteers to guard the front door so no one escapes?” Shepherd asked.
“I will.” Niko squared his shoulders.
Shepherd shook his head. “No offense, but if someone slips by, you’ll stumble all over the city trying to chase after them.”
Niko pulled one of his swords halfway up, revealing the shimmering blade. “Perhaps I should make it clear: no one will get by me.” He pushed the sword back in place.
Viktor gripped Gem’s shoulder. “I need you to get us inside like we talked about.”
Gem’s fingertips sparked, and she seemed to stand a foot taller. “I won’t let you down.”
Viktor addressed everyone in the group. “I do not want one child hurt. Not a single one. Do whatever you must—I give you permission to send those devils straight to hell, but protect the children first. We must get them out.”
Blue took a deep breath, and we all stole a moment to ready ourselves. This wasn’t a delicate operation with a lot of moving parts. We didn’t have to collect sensitive data or capture someone alive. This was a rescue mission, and the only ones leaving alive were the children.
Shepherd drew his gun. “Let’s roll.”
We marched up the street like vigilantes. The building was located in a desolate industrial area. No streetlamps, no traffic, and no witnesses. The weeds had taken over the sidewalks and random potholes.
“No movement on the roof,” Christian confirmed. “No cameras that I can see.”
Gem’s purple hair bobbed up and down like ribbons as she jogged to the front of the line. Blue light dripped from her fingertips like broken spiderwebs dancing in the breeze. When we reached an oversized garage door, everyone stood aside and let Gem do her thing.
She smiled blithely and widened her stance. “Watch this.”
Gem cupped her hands in front of her until they began to shake. As a Wielder, her energy balls were typically blue. But this time, a powerful orange light illuminated her hands.
Blue took a giant step back. “Maybe we should pick the lock instead.”
Gem’s hair stood on end, charged with static electricity. Remembering how her energy could reduce an immortal to nothing more than charred remains, I put more distance between us.
“Worry not,” Christian said. “The wee lass has improved her aim.”
Gem’s hands were spaced apart, and between them formed a blinding orange b
all. Once the light was as big as a softball, she gripped it in one hand and swung her arm like a pitcher. I drew in a sharp breath.
The metal door exploded. I shielded my face with one arm as hot sparks shot out and quickly dissipated before hitting the ground.
“Holy Toledo,” Wyatt said. “That’s a perfect hole.”
Shepherd held up his gun and marched forward. “Save that line for your next date.”
When Shepherd disappeared inside, we heard rapid gunfire. Everyone rushed in at once and immediately split up in different directions.
I jumped over a body by the door and jogged up a set of metal stairs, a dagger in hand. As I rounded a corner, I ran into a Shifter. It was tempting to toss him over, but he’d only become someone else’s problem. I sliced his neck and delivered a powerful electric shock to his chest, knocking him unconscious. He would bleed out before waking in time to shift.
The walkway on the second floor looped all the way around, but you could easily shortcut across the bridge. Below, I saw people scrambling and heard screams. Without overhead lights, it was difficult to make everything out. I noticed a playground, a seating area, and a kitchenette. Focusing on the second level, I busted open the first door on the right.
A man shot up from a chair. “What the fuck?”
Christian barged past me, scooped a young girl off the bed, and put her in my arms. “I’ll be right with you.”
When the door closed, I heard nothing but bloodcurdling screams.
I set the girl down, who looked to be around six. I still had a dagger in my hand and no idea what to do with her. She screamed and covered her ears when gunshots went off.
