by Kay Manis
“Dude, don’t be so hard on yourself,” Leif said. “None of us could have known this would happen.”
“Yeah, but I should have been there with her when they broke the news. None of this shit would have happened. She wouldn’t be sitting in a hospital room cut up and bleeding right now if I had been there to protect her.”
“Look, Dana and Hindley’s parents already feel awful.”
“Well, fuck, they should. How could they have let her just walk away after dumping that kind of news on her if they knew she’d cut herself before? They should have seen this coming. I mean, it doesn’t take a—”
“Stop, Rory!”
I flinched at the sound of Leif’s booming voice still echoing through the plane.
Then he was in front of me, his finger waving frantically in my face. “I don’t want to hear you say a fucking word to Dana or to Hindley’s parents about this when we get there, you got it? They already feel like shit and they don’t need your sorry ass dumping on them too.”
I sat back at his reprimand. He was right. I was the last person to judge anyone’s actions, least of all Hindley’s best friend and parents. “Look, I’m sorry, man. I don’t know what to do.” I threw my hands up. “I feel like shit.”
“Why?” Matt asked.
“Because I love her, more than anything. More than my own life. When she hurts, I hurt. It’s excruciating not being there with her.” I rubbed my eyes at the sting of the tears welling up.
“We’ll be there soon, man, it will be all right.” Matt reached out and patted my knee.
For the first time since I’d known Matt, I saw in him what Hindley had all along. He was a good man. All this time I’d been too blinded by fear, self-loathing, and jealousy to allow myself to really get to know him as a person. I needed good friends in my life. People like Matt Davis.
“Thanks, man.” I gave him a half smile. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?” He reclined in his seat.
“For being such a douche bag in the beginning. For calling your product douche water.”
He laughed. “It’s all good, Rory.”
The atmosphere in the plane shifted, becoming lighter. I could finally breathe again.
“Hey, dude.” Leif shook my shoulder.
I turned to find a grave expression marring his face.
“What is it, Leif?” I was right back in panic mode again.
“You know they’re investigating that employee from the hotel for drugging your food, right?”
“Yeah, Paloma told me. Actually, it was her research team that found out the truth.”
“Well, that wasn’t the end of the story.”
I sat up. “What else is there?”
“Someone paid him to give you the drugs.”
“Who?”
“Geneva.”
“I knew it!” I jumped out of my seat. “I knew that fucking bitch had done something. She hates Hindley so much. All this shit is her fault. God, if I saw her right now…” I clenched my fists trying to control my fury as I brooded around the small space, fighting off the urge to punch something, or someone.
“Calm down, dude,” Leif said. “Getting upset isn’t going to help anything.”
“How the fuck can you say that? That little bitch is the sole reason I’m not with Hindley. She and I have been apart for two weeks because that psycho bitch hates her so much. And now, Hindley hates me and probably won’t even let me into her fucking hospital room.”
“That’s not true,” Leif said.
“How the fuck do you know?”
“Dana said her parents told Hindley earlier today that it was Geneva who gave you the drugs. Apparently, Geneva confessed everything to them last night.”
“And so what, Geneva’s cleared of all wrongdoing?”
“No, not that.”
“Then what?”
“Hindley gets it.”
“Hindley gets what?”
“She understands now that the guy who cussed her out in front of God and half the hotel, and supposedly slept with her sister, wasn’t really you.”
“What are you saying? She believes me?”
“I don’t know if she believes you, but Dana said she at least wanted to talk to you after her parents told her that it was Geneva who drugged you.”
I stormed toward Leif, placing my hands on the arms of his recliner. “Are you fucking with me, man? Because if you are, I swear to God, I will beat the shit out of you right here, right now.”
“No, I’m not fucking with you.” He chuckled. “Dana said Hindley realized that the drug had made you act so crazy. Geneva admitted that you two had never slept together.”
“I knew it!” I shouted again. “There is no fucking way I would have ever slept with that skank.” I fell back into my seat, scrubbing my face with my hands, feeling a fraction of relief from the guilt and shame that had been running rampant through me for the past two weeks.
I hadn’t slept with Geneva. In the back of my mind, I’d always known that, but now Hindley knew it too. I couldn’t remember feeling happier in all my life.
“So what made Geneva cave and tell the truth?”
“Dana wasn’t sure, but she thinks her husband made her. Dana said he kicked her out of their house.”
“Good. She deserves a hell of a lot worse than that. Did Hindley’s parents take her in?”
“Hell, no,” Leif said. “They’re super pissed at Geneva. Especially now. Caroline told Dana that Geneva had crossed a line and she wasn’t entirely sure she’d ever forgive her. Especially after what’s happened with Hindley.”
I was happy to hear that news. At least Hindley wouldn’t have to put up with her parents acting like assholes too.
“So, Dana said she’s done this before, Hindley, I mean?” I asked.
“Yeah, apparently after the guy’s trial years ago, when she saw all the videos in court, it kind of started this whole cutting thing into motion.”
“God, that’s sick,” Matt choked out.
I’d forgotten he was even with us.
“How could anyone do that to another human being?” he mumbled, obviously picturing Hindley’s torture like the rest of us.
“So, you knew about the rape?” Leif looked over at me.
I nodded.
“I guess you’re the only person she told. She must really love you, man.”
“Do you think she’ll forgive me though?”
“I think, right now, you need to focus on her health and safety and well-being. If you can do that, I think it would be a good start for her.”
And that right there was why I loved Leif. He could break it down in simple terms, terms I could understand and follow.
“You’re right,” I agreed. “It’s about Hindley. I’ll do whatever I can to make sure she’s taken care of.”
“Even if that means she doesn’t want to see you?”
I held up my hand. “Don’t. I can’t go there right now, man.”
“I understand.” He wrapped his hand around my shoulder and gave me a reassuring squeeze.
A voice boomed over the PA system of the plane. “Gentlemen, we’ll be touching down in Austin in twenty minutes. Please find your way back to your seats and buckle in, if you haven’t already.”
My heart raced with the anticipation of seeing Hindley again. I didn’t care what she looked like or what state she was in, as long as I could see her, maybe even hold her, I knew we’d be all right.
Chapter 39
-RORY-
The smell of antiseptic and illness assaulted me as we burst through the sliding doors of the hospital. We stepped up to the reception desk.
“May I help you?” An older woman with shiny white hair gave us a glowering stare, as if she knew we were intruders.
“Um, yes,” Matt said. “We’re here to see Hindley Hagen.”
The woman turned toward the computer, hitting keys like she was writing a best-selling manuscript.
Time ticked by li
ke hours. I thought I’d jump out of my skin and straight through the plexiglass window dividing us if she didn’t find the information we wanted soon.
Leif covered my fist with his. I’d been unconsciously banging it on the counter like a rhythmic drum. “Calm down, man. Dana said she’s safe.”
His words sounded hollow even though I knew they were true. As far as I was concerned, Hindley would be in harm’s way until I saw her again.
“Oh, yes,” the lady answered, her eyes narrowing. “She’s on the fourth floor. I’m afraid that’s a secure area.”
Secure? Shit, this was really bad.
“Only family is allowed,” she said.
What the fuck was I going to do now?
“Yeah, we’re her brothers.” Leif nudged his way in front of me.
“Really?” the lady cocked a brow and tilted her head. We were not going to pull one over this old lady.
“Yes,” Matt said. “We’re her brothers.”
It sounded totally insane. None of us looked anything alike but somehow he held his ground, daring the woman to question him further.
She studied each of us individually, looking like a protective grandma bear, guarding one of her own.
I liked the fact that she was protecting Hindley from visitors who might bring her harm. I shook in my sneakers, knowing she probably thought that was me.
“Do you have ID?” she asked, her gaze landing on each of us with a questioning glare.
Shit, this was going to go south real quick. We pulled out our wallets and tossed our IDs on the counter. I held my breath, praying she’d let us by.
Grandma Bear surveyed each ID, holding it up to our individual faces like she was a bouncer at a nightclub. When she came to mine, she froze.
Ah, shit. She recognized me as the bastard who’d put Hindley in the hospital. Well, fuck Grandma Bear, no one was going to stop me from seeing the woman I loved. No one. I bullied my way past Leif, ready to do battle.
“Oh, Mr. Gregor, I’m so sorry.” Her tone was now friendly, her attitude completely different.
Matt, Leif, and I exchanged questioning glances. “Why are you sorry?” I asked.
“They’ve been expecting you.”
“Who’s been expecting me?”
“The family. Mr. and Mrs. Barton. Hindley’s parents. They’ve been asking about you.”
“Are you shitting me?” Leif and I asked in unison. Why would Hindley’s parents be expecting me?
Probably because they wanted to take my ass out in the parking lot and kick me into next week.
The receptionist cleared her throat. “Apparently, Ms. Hagen has been asking for you.”
My heart burst with joy, warmth spreading through my body. Hindley still wanted to see me. I’d never received a better gift in my life.
“You’ll need to check in at the nurses’ station on the fourth floor,” Grandma Bear instructed. “I’ll call up there now and let them know you’re on your way. You’ll need to show your ID again. And here.” She handed us tags.
“What are these for?” Leif asked.
“Who the fuck cares?” I shouted. “Just take it.”
Grandma Bear cut her eyes at me. “It shows the staff that you’ve been cleared to be on the floor. I don’t want you boys to be surprised when you get there. It’s…a little bit different than our other floors in the hospital.”
What the hell did that mean?
“Some of the patients will be restrained,” she said. Her voice remained passive but I could see the concern in her eyes.
“Restrained how?” I asked.
“You may find that their arms and or legs will be strapped down to the bed.”
“Are Hindley’s?” The thought of seeing Hindley tied down brought tears to my eyes. I knew I’d restrained her before, but that was for much different reasons, and it was consensual. But this was—bad.
“I’m not sure of Ms. Hagen’s current medical condition,” she said. “I only know that she was recently brought out of surgery and is still under close observation. I wanted to warn you so you won’t be surprised when you get to the floor.”
“Thank you,” Matt said.
“The elevators are around the corner to the right.” She pointed beyond us.
We fled toward the bank of elevators. My only thought was of getting to Hindley as quickly as my legs could carry me.
I stepped off the elevator, my legs weak and wobbly, afraid of what state I might find Hindley in. An icy chill ran down my spine as we stepped into the hallway. The floor felt dark and heavy. I had to get Hindley out of this place as soon as possible if she was ever going to recover.
My eyes darted up and down the hall. “Did she tell you what room number?” I asked Matt and Leif.
“No, but there’s a nurse. We’ll ask her.” Matt led the way toward a woman in dark blue scrubs. “Excuse me,” he said quietly, “we’re looking for Hindley Hagen.”
The middle-aged woman with sandy blonde hair turned around and surveyed each of us as if we were the Russian Mafia here to execute a hit. “Are you family?”
“Yes, we’re her brothers,” Matt said with no hesitation.
Her eyes scoured the three of us but came to rest on me, looking me up and down in the same protective way Grandma Bear had. At least someone had been protecting her in my absence.
A cold sweat broke out across my forehead and I felt dizzy thinking about what had happened to my Drunk Girl.
“You gonna be all right?” she asked.
I nodded, swallowing hard.
“I know who you are.” Her lips pursed as a brow arched high above her blue eyes.
Why did my shitty reputation have to precede me?
“You’re definitely not her brother. But Hindley’s been asking for you, so follow me.”
“Is she conscious?” I followed her down the hallway.
“No, she’s still pretty drugged up from surgery. Or she could still be in a comatose state.”
“What?” Coma?
She turned and glared at me.
I had to stay cool or they would kick my ass out of this place.
“Her family can explain it.”
I caught up with her so I could see her face. “Is she really in a coma?”
“It’s not a coma in the medical sense,” she said. “It’s more of a psychotic coma, the body’s way of protecting itself when it encounters too much emotional trauma.”
“Will she come out of it?” Matt asked.
I was happy for his concern because suddenly, I had lost my voice.
“Usually, yes, but I’ve seen some people stay in a catatonic state for months.”
Oh, God. Had I lost my Drunk Girl?
“Hindley seems resilient though,” the nurse said, “and she’s surrounded by a lot of people who love her. I suspect it’s only temporary.” She stopped and turned so abruptly, her ponytail slapped her in the face. “She cannot, and I repeat cannot become upset or agitated in the least. Do you understand?” Her menacing stare was directed at me.
“I understand,” I answered quietly, trying to reel in my emotions. I knew I had to be strong. And calm. I couldn’t lose my shit no matter how close I was.
“She is in a very delicate state right now, both physically and mentally. She is here to recover, not get worse. Understand?”
“We understand,” Matt said.
“Good.” She turned and continued down the hall.
Paul appeared in the hallway talking to someone in a white coat. The doctor maybe? He turned and our eyes locked. I was paralyzed with fear. Why did he want me here? Would he punch me in the face and tell me never to see his daughter again?
The hallway grew darker and closed in on me as I fought to catch my next breath. A look of relief washed across his worried face and I was finally able to exhale.
“It’s all right, man.” Leif rested his arm across my shoulders. “Remember, Dana said they wanted you here.”
I turned to my best friend, silen
tly thanking him for always being there for me, no matter the personal price to his own life.
The corner of his mouth curled up in a small smile and he nodded in acknowledgment of my gratitude.
“Doctor, this is Rory Gregor.” Paul came to stand by my side. The doctor and I shook hands then his gaze traveled between Leif, Matt, and me.
“These are my friends,” I said. The doctor’s concerned look prompted me to add. “And Hindley’s.” I gestured to them. “This is Leif Jennings and Matt Davis.”
I caught Matt’s look of surprise at being introduced as a friend of mine. But, it was true. Anyone who would come this far and go through all of this with me and my girl was definitely someone I admired and wanted in my life.
“Nice to meet you all.” The doctor shook hands with Leif and Matt.
“Dr. Saunders was just giving us an update,” Paul said.
The doctor gave Paul a questioning glance.
“It’s fine, you can share with them,” Paul said, nodding.
“Hindley’s condition is stable but still critical,” Dr. Saunders said.
All I heard was critical. My sweet girl was critical and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do.
“She sustained some pretty severe cuts to her forearm, cutting deep into the muscle. But thankfully, there’s no permanent nerve damage, at least as far as we can tell. Some of the lacerations were so deep we had to do internal stitches as well, hence the need for surgery. We didn’t want to put her body under more undue stress.”
Fuck.
She had cut herself so fucking deep they had to do surgery?
The walls around me closed in and I couldn’t breathe. I braced myself on the wall, praying I wouldn’t pass out. I had to be strong, for Hindley.
“How is she now?” I asked.
“She’s still unconscious from the surgery and not back in her room yet. We’re having a hard time waking her up. I’m not sure if it’s from the anesthesia or her protective comatose state she was in when she arrived at the hospital.”
“Can I see her?”
“She should be back in her room soon,” the doctor said. “It all just depends on her condition.”
Suddenly, I felt her, her presence was all around me.
