Chapter 9: Temptation
Next morning Nil was perturbed to hear Namsell talking with Samten in an unintelligible dialect. He did not come out of the cave but he was already familiar with the voice of Namsell. The reply of Samten was laconic and at last he said something gruffly after which Namsell left. So Namsell was still after them and Nil was sure he had some evil design – likely to be spying on them and trying to find out what he and Doma were after. It was clear to Nil that the man did not buy their story of high level meditation in the caves. Nil was a bit perturbed. If Namsell went on spying it would be impossible to carry on their mission secretly. It was highly likely that he would roam around at night too. When Samten met then to learn about the progress of the day's work he informed Nil that Namsell was querying about them and he had told him gruffly that it was sacrilegious on the part of common people to have curiosity about high level religious monks and nuns. Samten too suspected Namsell to have something to do with the tantric. He had already gathered information that the man frequently visited the tantric’s temple and also practiced tantra cult. It was quite likely that he was an informer appointed by the tantric.
While Nil expressed his apprehensions that if the man spied on them at night too, it would be impossible to keep their mission secret from the tantric. He also informed Samten in detail how the Bhutia had followed him right from his arrival at the New Jalpaiguri railway station. At this Samten smiled and said that the man had never been to the plains to the best of his knowledge. He assured Nil that he had forbidden Namsell to enter the sacred place again and his trusted men were keeping strict watch on the movements of Namsell. Nil, however, could not shake the disquiet off his mind all through the day.
But he forgot it when they started work in the evening. Doma was now completely transformed. She looked jovial and enthusiastic, but never made any insinuating gesture, nor did she look at Nil with lustful eyes. The promise had done the miracle, Nil thought. But he was very much confused at the complicated nature of his thought process. While she had been trying to tempt him into sin, he was extremely worried and prayed to god to give him power to overcome temptation. So, her behavior now should have satisfied him. But, instead, something started pinching him. Her apathetic attitude toward him made him feel lonely and hollow. So, notwithstanding outward exhortations to maintain perfect sanctity, did his subconscious mind rejoice her outburst of passion? He said to himself, ‘do I really desire in my inner mind that she reveals her strong desire and lust toward me? How funny! While she expresses her strong desire for me I feel perturbed, but if she behaves the other way, I feel morose and abandoned.’
They worked hard for the next few days and their progress was uninterrupted and completely free from hazards and they could reach the targeted spot two days before the estimated time. The hilly path rose steeply and then ended into a level ground about thirty feet long and twenty five feet wide. The trees were sparse here. The level ground ended in a gentle slope climbing the cursed plateau. Everything was clearly visible in bright moon light. They hastened to cut off the bushes and clear a large circular space. They closely inspected the spot and the adjacent rise of the plateau and there was no indication that the place had been visited by any human being in near past. So it would be a safe hiding place and a base from where they could venture into the plateau. They would undertake the first venture under the cover of darkness. The outside temple with the humanoid image of the goddess was for the ordinary devotees. The tantric rituals must be performed at a secret place. They would have to trace it out without being detected by the tantric and his men.
With the twigs of the pines and strong creepers and using the tree trunks as poles they started erecting three shanties – one for Nil, the second for Doma and the small one as kitchen and store room. They used tarpaulin and mats as the roofs. In three days the temporary shelter was erected. The gaps between trees being irregularly spaced the roofs of the shanties took odd shapes raising laughter of both Nil and Doma.
On the fourth day, they moved on to their new home. It was very thrilling for them. Doma was very hilarious and always crooning songs in her own dialect. She inaugurated their new life by preparing spice-tea in her new kitchen.
She said in a light mood, 'after completion of the mission we won’t go back to the localities and live in this beautiful house'.
Nil said, ‘but this makeshift shanty won’t withstand strong wind or rain’
‘We shall make it stronger later on' Doma replied forthright.
Nil felt pricks inside. Doma had taken his promise seriously and taken it for granted that they would marry and live together after completion of the mission, but it appeared absurd to Nil.
Nil felt at his heart that sooner or later all her dreams would be completely shattered and the rest of the lives of both of them would be miserable and tragic. Nil went out of the room under the ruse of inspecting the creeper bindings of the structure simply to conceal his emotions. ‘No, I should ignore these worries and be solely preoccupied with the sacred mission now,’ Nil said to himself.
The moon went down behind the hills soon and it was dark only with the cluster of stars in the clear sky. The ambience with the dark hills and trees around and the sky dotted with stars enchanted Nil. The crickets were making their monotonous noises, interrupted occasionally by sounds of insects and screeches of nocturnal birds. They started their adventure toward the plateau and Nil’s heart throbbed with thrill and consternation. Doma's face in semi darkness looked uncanny. She was now preoccupied only with the adventure.
The slope was gentle and the bushes sparse and they could effortlessly climb upwards keeping to the middle of the plateau. Soon they came upon a clear space with only the scattered burnt trunks of trees. Nil realized that these were the leftover of the ominous conflagration. They moved very cautiously making least possible noise and keeping strict watch on all sides. The causeway leading to the temple and the top of the plateau was now only a few feet from them. The silhouette of the dome of the temple with flags at the top was now clearly visible. Nil’s heartbeats increased in excitement. They were soon going to enter the forbidden zone and henceforth they would have to be very cautious. The causeway leading to the temple went further up to enter the forbidden zone and devotees were not permitted to move beyond the temple. They decided to return now and continue the venture the next day. On their return they fortunately came upon a depressed spot from where they could keep watch on the causeway remaining under the cover of the burnt trunks guarding the front of the low land.
They returned to the shanty and Doma lighted the stove to prepare the dinner. In bed confused thoughts and contradictory emotions streamed through Nil's mind. He at times felt that his promise to the goddess was simply a dream. So nothing harmful would come out of their physical union. Then his thoughts drifted to the tantric. All the promises of the tantric to the hill people appeared to be sheer hype to Nil and he guessed that all the hazards of the hill people were but designs of the tantric.
He now felt happy that the thought of the tantric had helped him overcome temptations and he had passed the first of the stringent tests he was put into by the goddess.
The Curse Of The Goddess Page 9
