by Jennifer Joy
Georgiana laced her fingers together and picked at her thumb nail. "It is my fault."
"I find that difficult to believe."
Looking up, Georgiana said, "Nonetheless, it is true. You see, I had done something so foolish only a short time before he was set to join Mr. Bingley at Netherfield Park…"
Elizabeth's curiosity burst at the seams, but as she watched Georgian pick at her fingers and struggle with the words, she wanted to soothe her. "If it is too difficult to tell, then perhaps you had best remain silent. I would never have you speak of what brings you pain."
"I must tell you. It is in my brother's best interest that I do so. He has sacrificed so much for me, it is the least I can do. I know that he respects you, and it bothers him that you have thought poorly of him. It is not pride which keeps him silent where I am concerned, but rather his need to protect me."
Once again, Elizabeth assured her, "For at least a month, I have thought nothing but kind thoughts toward Mr. Darcy. Please, Georgiana, do not reveal anything to me unless you wish it."
"But I must. You are my friend and I know that I can trust you with my secret. It will be a relief for me to share some of my burden."
Elizabeth waited for her to continue, for nothing she could say would dissuade her.
"Had William not prevented it, I would now be married these seven months to George Wickham."
Elizabeth gasped.
Georgiana continued, "He convinced me that he loved me and we were on our way to Gretna Green when my brother heard of it. He found us at Ramsgate, where my companion had arranged for us to meet and continue our journey north. It was Mr. Bingley’s valet who overheard George boasting about his plans to secure a fortune.” She paused, her hands trembling. “When I found out that he only wanted my dowry to pay off his debts, I thought that life would never be worth living again. I fear what I might have done had William not stayed up all night with me."
Elizabeth reached forward and squeezed Georgiana's hands.
"When the hurt wore off, I was angry— angrier than I have ever been. William established me in London and filled my days with hour upon hour of instruction to keep my mind and my hands busy. He would have stayed with me, but I convinced him to go to Hertfordshire with Mr. Bingley. He is a good friend to William, and I felt that he needed some time away from me to forget his worries. I, too, needed some time to myself."
Elizabeth exhaled the breath she had held. "Oh, Georgiana, I am so sorry. Mr. Wickham led me to believe that Mr. Darcy was the worst sort of man."
Georgiana's eyes flashed in anger. "It is largely for that reason that I needed to speak to you. I will not allow that man to have any influence in my life, nor affect others' impression of my brother. Wickham does not deserve my kindness nor that of my friends."
"I am beginning to understand and I thank you. I am coming to realize how unfair my treatment of your brother has been." She groaned. "I was abominably rude to him when he asked me to dance. I have long since regretted it, though I believed myself justified because of his treatment of me."
"The day of the Meryton Assembly? He deeply regrets snubbing you as he did. You see, William had received word of Mr. Wickham's further offenses earlier that same day. I was not the only one affected, and my brother, having a deep sense of responsibility, felt compelled to set right as much as he could when he learned how Mr. Wickham had involved our family name. I can only imagine the ill humor such a letter must have provoked."
"If only he would have stayed behind…" began Elizabeth.
Georgiana raised her eyebrow. "Would that have made you doubt Mr. Wickham when he so boldly spoke against my brother?"
Elizabeth was crushed. She still would have believed him. His happy manners had blinded her.
Chapter 18
Darcy rushed downstairs, bumping into Gordon in his haste to hurry back to Georgiana and Miss Elizabeth. Finally, he had the opportunity to converse with Miss Elizabeth, and Georgiana had sent him away!
"In a bit of a hurry, Darcy?" teased Gordon. "I am on my way outside for some fresh air as well. It is dreadfully hot in there."
“I was sent to fetch some refreshments." He hoped Gordon would take his hint and let him be, but the infernal man fell into step beside him.
"Darcy, there is something on which I want your opinion."
Darcy bunched his cheeks up. Now was not the time. He needed to get back. He did not slow his pace, but when Gordon persisted on keeping up with him, his conscience irked him. Slowing down, he said, "Very well. What is it?"
Gordon sighed in relief and led him to a secluded corner. Whatever Gordon wanted to inquire about was something of import.
Shuffling his feet like a nervous schoolboy, Gordon cleared his throat. Darcy waited, reminding himself to be patient.
"I think that I am falling in love, Darcy," he blurted, shoving his hands into his pockets, then pulling them out again to wipe his forehead with his handkerchief.
Darcy's gut twisted and the air thickened. "Who is the fortunate lady?" he asked, fearing the answer.
"Miss Elizabeth, though I would be the most fortunate man in all of England if she were to return my affection."
"Do you have any reason to doubt her returned affection?" Darcy prayed that he would have several of them.
Gordon bowed his head. "Any damage done to my chances with her is of my own making, and I am determined to win her good opinion."
That was how it had started with Darcy. His heart froze, then skipped a beat. Was he so daft as to miss all the inward signs that he was in love with Miss Elizabeth when Gordon, a man he always considered inferior to him in intellect, so easily identified his feelings? He bit the insides of his cheeks, feeling foolish and regretting every haughty thought he had ever had toward his peers. Who was the stupid one now?
Gordon continued, "Never have I met another lady like Miss Elizabeth. She has real thoughts, and I can talk about things of import with her."
What had they talked about that was so important?
"When I make her laugh, I feel like the most powerful man in London."
What had Gordon said that was so funny? Darcy tried to count how many times he had at least made Miss Elizabeth smile. Surely, that counted for something.
"She made me see myself for what I really am, and it has made me determined to be a better man. Now, tell me, Darcy if that is not the best sort of woman to seek as a wife."
Dear God, would the man propose? Darcy could not bear to see Elizabeth— his Elizabeth as he longed to be her William— on the arm of any other man. His throat stuck together, and he could not speak even if he wanted to. So, he nodded like the fool he had been. The fact was, Elizabeth would make the perfect wife… for him. And he would die trying to deserve her. So long as he was not too late.
"What do you think, Darcy? Do you think I have a chance with her?"
Darcy swallowed hard. He wanted Elizabeth in his life forever, but he would never do anything to prevent her future happiness. More than anything, he wanted to be the source of happiness for her… but he could not deny her if he was not. His lungs deflated and he felt like he shrunk a couple inches. Never had it been so difficult to act honorably. "I can only applaud your choice, Gordon. If you think that you can make her happy, then you lose nothing other than your pride in trying to win her hand. It is a small price to pay for so great an honor."
Gordon clapped him on the shoulder, but Darcy hardly felt it. "Thank you. I knew I could rely on you. When Sophia suggested that I befriend Miss Elizabeth, I never thought it would lead to this!"
"What?" asked Darcy, stunned at what Gordon had so easily let slip.
"That is right. Sophia told me Miss Elizabeth's motives in coming to town, and like the good friend she is, she hoped to raise her spirits by asking some of us to show some interest in her. She said that it would help her chances at making a good match all the sooner. I was only too happy to oblige. You know me, Darcy, I am a helpless flirt…, although I will mend my ways
once I am married."
A sense of foreboding— and of being played like a chess pawn— filled him. Why would Sophia go to such great lengths to entertain Elizabeth? What was her motive in introducing her to Gordon, who had never before shown an inclination toward matrimony?
Lost in his thoughts, he looked up to see Gordon already gone. Pulling out his watch, Darcy checked the time. Only a couple of minutes had passed, but it felt like so much longer. Covering the distance to the refreshment table in short time, he tossed back the first beverage he saw and grabbed two more to take up to the waiting ladies. He kept his vision above everyone's heads, an advantage of his height he was particularly grateful for at that moment. He wanted no more distractions to interrupt him.
Weaving through the people walking too slowly for his taste going up the stairs, he paused when he reached the top and looked down the sparsely populated hallway. Sophia stood just outside the curtain to Gordon's box. Her hand was over her mouth and her eyes were fixed on the red velvet pressed against her ear.
"What are you doing?" he called out.
Sophia's eyes flashed open, but she expertly covered her shock with a smile. She raised her finger up to her lips to shush him as he drew nearer. "Hush, Darcy. I was only trying to hear a bit of gossip— for all the good it does me."
It was difficult to hear over the clinking of glasses and the clattering of heels against the marble floors. Hundreds of conversations amassed together to sound like a buzzing hive of bees.
"For what are you listening? When I left, only Georgiana and Miss Elizabeth remained." He would not let Sophia off the hook so easily.
Looking down at her toes and shuffling her feet, she said, "I had hoped to hear something of Elizabeth, if you must know. She has become my dearest friend, but as close as we are, Georgiana and I are like sisters. There are some things about Miss Elizabeth which hardly recommend her as a friend to an impressionable girl, innocent in the ways of the world."
"You speak thus of a close friend? If you find anything objectionable about Miss Elizabeth, I wonder at you befriending her despite your concerns." He felt his hackles rise. Georgiana should be so fortunate as to allow herself to be influenced by a woman with a strong mind and even stronger values.
"You are as prickly as a hedgehog, Darcy, but how well do you really know Elizabeth? From what you told me, she snubbed you while you were in Hertfordshire.”
“I can hardly blame her for it. In hindsight, I acted rather boorishly and she believed herself justified.”
“While her sense of morality is sensitive, there is the means by which her family gained its wealth to consider."
"Does it matter? What of your comment to Miss Bingley yesterday?"
"I would never own that Miss Bingley could be correct. It would give her more airs than she already has. However, she did raise a good point. Mrs. Bennet, from what I hear, has become a frequent player at the gambling houses. She had incredibly good luck at first, but it is beginning to run out. She lost ten pounds to Mrs. Gordon only yesterday."
"If Gordon's mother holds no qualms in playing for money, then how can you judge the ladies with whom she plays? Or do you judge Mrs. Gordon as harshly as you judge Mrs. Bennet?" He struggled to keep his voice down.
Sophia huffed at him. "You can be so hard-headed, Darcy. Can you not see that I am merely acting out of concern for your little sister?" She crossed her arms and jutted her jaw determinedly.
She did have a point there. It did not justify her attempt to eavesdrop, but he would not have known about Georgiana's real reason for wishing to travel to Ramsgate had it not been for an eavesdropping valet who had been so kind as to pass the information on to him.
He would not pardon her conduct against Miss Elizabeth, but he would not chastise her either.
"Let us join them, then." He stepped through the curtain before she could object or suggest any other alternative.
Elizabeth's head whirled. Until that moment, she hardly knew herself. Mr. Darcy walked through the curtain, with a glass of punch in his hand for her. She almost dropped it when her fingers touched his and she felt a jolt like a shock of lightning. She was aware of his every move as he sat next to Georgiana. Sophia followed behind him and took her place next to Elizabeth, but all Elizabeth could focus on was how near his knee was to hers.
What a fool she had been! She had allowed Mr. Wickham's happy manners and smooth conversation to persuade her to believe the worst of a man who was far more honorable. Mr. Darcy was everything good, and her shame at her prejudice against him only deepened as she reflected on her past conduct toward him. Of course, she had apologized, but she did not feel that it was enough anymore. That he thought well of her despite her undeserved, harsh comments spoke so highly of his forgiving nature, she felt humbled. How could she possibly set things right?
"You are quiet all of a sudden, Elizabeth. What were you two talking about for so long?" asked Sophia.
Elizabeth did not allow herself to look at Georgiana, though that was where her thoughts went. With a smile meant to appease Sophia's curiosity, she said, "I was describing all of the first act to Georgiana as she was stuck behind Miss Matthews and her impressively obstructive feathers."
Getting the laugh she had sought, Elizabeth continued, "It is my hope to convince Mr. Gordon to allow Georgiana to sit in the front row so that she will not miss the second half of the performances. Will you help me?" she asked Sophia and Mr. Darcy.
Mr. Darcy said, "We may as well stand in front of a milliner’s shop if we are forced to remain behind her."
Georgiana giggled at her brother's rare show of humor. To Elizabeth, it was rare anyway. She wondered if he laughed easily or if the weight of the responsibilities he bore had made him overly serious for so long, he had forgotten how to relax. There was so much she wished to learn about him.
Chapter 19
Elizabeth counted the hours until Charlotte would arrive. Her mind was in such a turmoil, she hardly knew what to think. Charlotte, having been her best friend since childhood, would see through her immediately and determine what had kept Elizabeth awake for the past two nights.
Charlotte arrived in her father's carriage at precisely the hour designated. Elizabeth waited for her on the other side of the front door. The ladies of the house, excepting Mary, who had taken permanent residence at the school for orphans and was thriving in her new environment, waited as proper ladies ought to— in the drawing room where they pretended to be interested in a book or engrossed in their needlepoint.
Elizabeth quit pacing in order to watch more closely the passing figures crossing in front of the frosted glass windows on either side of the door. The weather was finally warming in time for the beginning of the Season, and an array of colors passed by.
A drab gray cape fluttered in front of the window, and Elizabeth skipped in excitement. She opened her arms as the door opened to her dear friend.
"Charlotte!" she exclaimed, rushing forward to receive her. They embraced each other tightly, and Elizabeth felt that Charlotte must have missed her every bit as much as she had missed Charlotte.
Pulling back and holding Elizabeth at arm's length, Charlotte said, "Oh, Lizzy! It is so good to see you again! I cannot thank you enough for inviting me when you did!" Something in her wording alarmed Elizabeth.
"How so? Is all well at Lucas Lodge?" she asked.
"All is well with me, but I fear that my views are perhaps a bit too modern for my antiquated father. I will explain it all later, but for now, I would love to see the rest of your family. Are they in?" She looked around the entrance hall.
Elizabeth pretended to slap her arm. "You are evil leaving me intrigued as you have. Now I must suffer through the polite conversation in the drawing room until we have the opportunity to catch up."
Charlotte grinned impishly. "And you think that I am not curious what you have been doing since arriving in town nearly two months ago? I know your reasons for insisting on being here, and I am dying to know if
you have met with any success." She looked expectantly at Elizabeth— as if Elizabeth would give her the satisfaction of an easy answer after leaving her curiosity unsatisfied.
"You will just have to wait," she said flippantly as she looped her arm through Charlotte's and led her into the drawing room.
Charlotte stepped in and Elizabeth heard her catch her breath as she took in her surroundings. It was such a commonplace room to Elizabeth now, but she supposed it would be impressive to a newcomer— especially a newcomer who knew the state of their drawing room at Longbourn.
Mother rose to greet Charlotte, as did Jane.
"How do you do, Miss Lucas? I do hope that your journey here was not too fatiguing? Is your mother well? I was so afraid that she harbored hurt feelings toward us when we left…." Mother looked at her hopefully. There was nothing she enjoyed more than touting her change of fortune in Lady Lucas' face.
Charlotte took her prying with grace. "Mother is well. Please do not concern yourself on her account. As for my journey, I found it refreshing to have a change of scenery from the fields and rolling hills to the busy streets of London. I look forward to my time here very much, and I thank you for your generous hospitality in receiving me into your home."
Elizabeth squeezed her arm and bobbed up and down on her toes. There was so much she wanted to tell Charlotte— so much she wanted to hear from her— she could hardly contain her excitement.
Kitty and Lydia welcomed Charlotte with all the enthusiasm Elizabeth expected from the girls who thought Charlotte to be as exciting as a stick of mud. At least they would not bother them when they could finally steal away for their chat.
Mother ordered tea and a light repast. It neared the calling hour, and it was no bother to Mother, since she had acquired the habit of partaking of an afternoon snack before dinner.
They expected the tea tray to be brought in when a visitor was announced.
