Heart’s Cry
By Rita Peterson
Copyright © 2020 Rita Peterson
Published by Forget Me Not Romances, an imprint of Winged Publications
Editor: Cynthia Hickey
Book Design by Forget Me Not Romances
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may
be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording, or
otherwise—without the prior written permission of
the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations
in printed reviews. Piracy is illegal. Thank you for
respecting the hard work of this author.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters,
Places, incidents, and dialogues are either products
of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously.
Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead,
or events is coincidental. Scripture quotations
from The Authorized (King James) Version.
Fiction and Literature: Inspirational
Christian Contemporary Romance
Chapter 1
Lily Ann MacBride stared at her disfigured right hand. Tomorrow she was to board a jetliner to Anchorage, Alaska. She ran her left hand down her neck, reminding herself how scarred and discolored her skin appeared. Her right hand slid into her sweater sleeve. She swallowed hard and squinted back the tears, recalling the heated argument between herself and her supervisor, Mindy. Lily Ann knew Mindy meant business, and with no room to negotiate, she was forced to transfer to the Alaskan Regional Hospital.
Lily Ann studied her plane ticket. She flipped it back and forth searching for a mistake, then her exhausted body flopped down on her twin-size bed. Mindy was utterly wrong. Seattle, Washington was her home since birth. Sure she lived alone, but why should Mindy control what she was involved in and who she associated with?
Lily Ann tossed the plane ticket on her nightstand, her eyes darting to the alarm clock. Seven-sixteen p.m. She’d better motivate herself to pack before her six o’clock-morning flight.
Packing up her life was more stressful than she had imagined. Her tiny three-hundred square foot, one-bedroom condo contained only the bare necessities. Picking up her oversized black suitcase, she grabbed her two favorite emergency medical books off the rustic bookshelf to pack into her bag. Her entire life would have to fit into this oversized suitcase. But still, as sparse as her belongings were, packing them made her stomach twist.
Lily Ann reached inside her carry-on bag and pulled out her Android cell phone. She swiped the home screen and called her mom. Maybe some conversation may help ease the stress.
On the third ring, her mother, Lynne, answered.
“Mom, I really need to talk to you while I pack. I’m out-of-this-world stressed about this transfer.” She twisted her long brunette hair around her finger, then she placed her mom on speaker phone as she packed. Her seamstress had done an admirable job with her uniform. Every seam flowed into the next. The seamstress had manipulated the traditional doctor shirt by stitching a turtleneck and sleeves into it. Lily Ann ran her hand down the ribs of the turtleneck and folded the four different colored uniforms into her suitcase.
“I know this is hard on you, but think about it, Sweetie. Change is good. It pushes us out of our comfort zone and makes us stronger.”
This was her mom, always seeking out the positive in everything. Lily Ann didn’t want to hear the positive. All she wanted was someone to sympathize with her about the agonizing reality that she was being forced to accept this transfer, or she would have had to take a leave of absence, or worse be terminated.
“Lily Ann, are you still there?”
“Yes...I—” Lily Ann breathed deeply to control her anger. “I don’t want to go. I just turned forty. The last thing I want to do is move thousands of miles away from you. You are all I have.” Lily Ann swung her body around to face the mirror hanging on the wall near her corner desk. She stared at herself, scanning her scarred neck again. “People know me here and don’t ask questions about what happened. I’ve set myself up to be invisible to the outside world and work with the people who need my expertise.” A tear trickled down her flushed cheeks. “Mom, moving is not going to make me any happier than I am already.”
“Sweetie, you aren’t really happy.”
Lily Ann gulped. “You’re right.” She stared at the floor. “That’s why I work all the time. It keeps me alive. Mindy is a control freak. She’s destroying my life by sending me to Alaska.”
“Forget Mindy for a moment. What you need is someone who will love you for who you are. That’s what’s missing from your life. After your father passed away, I wished I’d allowed myself to remarry.”
Lily Ann’s mouth quivered. “I want to be loved. Sometimes so badly it hurts. But I’m always rejected after they see my burns. Men want a woman with a pretty face and a sexy body. I don’t have either.” She cupped her face in her trembling hands.
“Oh, sweetie, you’re beautiful inside and out. Don’t ever think you’re not. Remember, it’s only six months and then you’ll be back in Seattle.”
Lily Ann could sense her mother’s love through her calm voice. How could her mom always stay so relaxed? Here she was angry and inhospitable, venting all her frustrations, and her mom remained as composed as ever on the phone. Even when she was eleven, fighting for her life in the hospital, her mother had never once panicked. It was her voice, her love that kept Lily Ann fighting.
“Listen, sweetie, stay focused. Forget about finding Mr. Right for now. You are the country’s best doctor in your field. Use this time and share your knowledge with the new staff.”
“But, mom, we’re talking about Alaska. It’s cold and harsh, and why would anyone want to live in a place like that? Why raise a family when it’s winter most of the year?” It was no use. She was beyond good conversation. Lily Ann paced her bedroom and grabbed a rubber band off her dresser and pulled back her fine, straight hair in a messy bun, leaving a few strands to fall in front of her face. “I’m sorry, mom. I have no right to act this way with you. I called you for support, and here I am mouthing off and acting immature.”
“It’s okay. Vent all you want.”
Lily Ann reached for her cell phone and tapped off the speaker phone. She held the cell to her left ear and sank her exhausted body unto her bed. “Mindy doesn’t understand me. My life is my job and my job is my life. I don’t have friends to hang out with. I live, breathe, and eat my career.” Lily Ann pulled out the rubber band and let her hair fall over her shoulders as she fell back, her head sinking into her pillow. “My patients are my family. Many of my wee patients don’t have a family of their own. All they have are the neonatal nurses and me.”
“I get it, sweetie. But even in harsh climates babies are born. Expecting mothers need exceptional care and you can provide that.”
She knew deep down her mother with right, but that was not the reason Mindy wanted her to transfer. Her mom didn’t get it. Frustrated beyond measure, she had to end this conversation. “I need to let you go. I still have lots of packing to do and I need some sleep. Love is for everyone else but me, it seems. Love you, mom.” Lily Ann hung up and tossed her cell phone across her bed. It landed with a bounce on her duvet. She rolled over and punched her pillow, crossed her arms, and wept.
~
Clyde Nelson whistled as he exited the automatic doors of the Alaska Regional Hospital in Anchorage. He adjusted his jacket collar to cover his neck and reached into his pocket for his leather driving gloves. The early October wind hustled through the naked trees rattling their branches in th
e wake of winter’s arrival. Clyde fumbled for a moment with his truck keys and unlocked the driver’s door. He proceeded to fire up his old girl to begin the forty-five-minute trek home out of the city. “Come on, you can do it. Turn over, will you, Roxy?” His navy blue 1993 Ford F-150 pickup hadn’t let him down yet.
The engine finally roared. With a triumphant smile, he slammed the steering wheel with both hands, then closed the rusty door and cranked up the heat.
The howling wind had blanketed the old Ford truck with a fresh cover of snow. Gripping the steering wheel with both hands, Clyde turned north off Alaska Regional Drive and onto Airport Heights Drive. In a few minutes, he exited northeast onto Glenn Highway for the remaining trip out of Anchorage.
Dusk quickly fell as he passed Thunderbird Falls and turned left off the highway down a gravel approach. Clyde pulled up to his two-bedroom log cabin, turned off the ignition, and switched off the lights. In silence, he sat there a moment and stared out into the blackness, noticing how the moonlight touched the swaying branches.
Home. He hurried and unlocked the door.
He’d just poured himself a strong cup of coffee when his cell phone buzzed. “Hey, Dad, how’s my old man?” Henry faithfully called him after his rotation to make sure he made it safely home. They’d chat about ten minutes and then his father would drive over to drop off his dog.
Clyde reclined in his suede chair and clicked on the television. Taking a sip of his coffee, he updated his father on all the hospital drama and emergencies during his shift. From a deadly car crash to two heart attacks, a choking youngster, broken bones, and food poisoning, his rotation was jam-packed with action.
A single knock at the front door alerted Clyde that his dad had arrived.
“Son, you look beat.”
Clyde nodded and knelt to give his three-year-old St. Bernard, Four, a good ear rubbing and a back scratch. With his tail wagging and slobber dripping, Four licked Clyde across the face.
“He misses you alright.” Henry removed his winter jacket, toque, and Muck boots, then sat on a kitchen chair. “Have you met the new doc yet?”
Clyde reached for the jar of dog treats and gave Four a command to sit and roll over. Four effortlessly sat but hadn’t mastered rolling over yet. “No, I don’t meet her until tomorrow at the airport. I plan on picking her up and driving her to where she’s planning to stay.” He stood. “All I know is she’s from Seattle. Not sure how she’s going to manage here in the freezing cold.”
“Well, she wouldn’t be transferring from Seattle to Anchorage if she didn’t like chilly temperatures.” Henry chuckled and gave Four a pat on the head. He glanced at Clyde. “You seem worried.”
After placing his empty coffee mug in the sink, Clyde pulled out a kitchen chair and sat across from his dad. “It doesn’t make sense. She is such an accomplished doctor. I’ve read numerous scientific reports by her in many medical journals. Why would she want to transfer to Alaska? When I chatted with her through Skype, the connection was poor, so the screen was fuzzy, but she didn’t come across as excited or even happy about the transfer. Her voice was monotone when she answered my questions.” Clyde stroked his goatee. “I don’t know, dad. Am I missing something?”
“You know, people aren’t always themselves. Maybe she had a stressful day and didn’t feel like talking.”
“Yeah, I hope I’m overreacting. We really need her expertise.” Clyde’s mind reviewed Lily Ann’s list of accomplishments and degrees. He calculated she had nearly twenty years of post-secondary education and a list of awards and scientific studies she’d headed. He was the most interested in her vast knowledge of preemie care for opioid-addictive babies making a quick recovery without days of withdrawal.
“Son, I need to head home and get some rest. I got a ten-mile run with the musher team tomorrow to keep them in shape for the race coming soon.” Henry stood and made his way to the front door. He slipped his toque over his bald head, zipped up his jacket, and pulled on his boots.
“Sounds great. At seventy-six I can’t believe you still race. It’s hard on the younger adults, let alone an old man.”
Henry grinned and kicked his heels in the air. “Old man. I bet those youngsters can’t do that.”
Chuckling, Clyde gave his father a high-five and opened the creaking front door to bid him goodnight.
~
The icy cold wind bit at Lily Ann’s unprotected face. Imagine arriving in Alaska at the beginning of winter. She rubbed her frozen hands together. The five-minute walk from the jet to the terminal seemed like an eternity. She already wanted to flee from the winter’s entrapment. But as she stepped through the automatic doors into the sudden warmth, her thoughts turned to the task at hand: find Clyde Nelson and get settled into her temporary living arrangements.
Lily Ann plodded toward the conveyor belt and reached for her black suitcase. Adjusting her carry-on bag over her right shoulder, she wheeled her luggage to the restroom. A gentle tap on her left shoulder triggered her to spin around.
“Miss, are you Dr. Lily Ann MacBride?”
Her eyes scrutinized the tall well-built man standing a few feet from her. “Yes. You must be Dr. Nelson.” She shook his hand with her left and slowly slid her other one into her jacket sleeve. How firm his handshake felt. His large hands engulfed hers. She smiled back and adjusted her carry-on bag.
“Let me help you take a load off your shoulders.” He reached for her bag. “What do you have in here?” he joked.
“Oh, a little of this and a little of that.” Her heart was pumping too fast. She noted his rustic appearance and well-groomed goatee. The man in front of her sparked an emotional response she hadn’t felt in decades. What is going on with me? Jeepers, I need to get control of myself. She tucked her brunette hair behind her ears and forced herself to look him in the eye. An awkward moment of silence followed, and Lily Ann averted his eyes. “My place is two blocks from the hospital. I’m exhausted and would really like to unpack my—”
Clyde cut her off. “Would you like a short tour of the city? I promise it will be short, so you have a general idea where things are.”
Lily Ann shrugged and sighed. If she said no, she would sound disrespectful and get off to a bad start. But if she said yes, she would have to spend more one-on-one time with him and run the risk of actually liking him. Her life was complicated enough. The urge to turn around and fly back to her lonely but familiar life in Seattle was strong. She didn’t have time for relationships. The NICU needed her. “Sure, as long as it’s a quick tour, okay?”
~
Clyde tossed her suitcase in the back of his pickup truck and opened the creaky passenger door. He watched her elegant body hop onto the seat, closed the squeaky door, and made a mental note to grease the hinges. He slammed the truck box and got into the driver’s seat. “I hope you don’t mind my dog, Four. He comes with me everywhere I go when I’m on days off.” Clyde watched her face for a welcoming expression but received only a cold glare. “He’s a big slobbery mutt, but give him a chance. He will grow on you.”
“Sure, well…let’s see some sights.”
Clyde didn’t know how to act with this pretty doctor sitting next to him. Fourteen years ago he would have asked her out. But his life was different now. Could he move on? He took a deep breath and watched her silky hair fall over her shoulders. His heart raced and his hands became clammy. Start the stupid truck. Thought my life was back to normal. But deep down, normalcy was not what he longed for. “Come on, Roxy. Turn over, girl.” The engine fired up on the fifth attempt.
“So you’re the type of guy that likes to name his trucks.” She smirked at him, then stared out the window as they left the airport.
Clyde, for the first time in his life—besides when he met his wife, Maria—was completely speechless. He headed downtown. As he pointed out family-owned shops and local food markets, he noticed her slightly shivering. “Are you cold? Do you want the heater on high?”
“I guess I’
m a bit cold. The weather here is a different kind of cold than Seattle’s.”
“I don’t mean to me nosy, but is that your warmest jacket? And your footwear…do you have boots? Or any winter mitts, toque, scarf?” She would freeze, and it was only the beginning of winter. In his opinion, it was not really cold yet. Sure, the wind was blowing, and light snowflakes danced in the sky, but the sun was out, warming the afternoon.
Lily Ann twitched in her seat. “I feel kind of naive, but, no, I don’t have any winter gear. I figured it would only be a two-block walk to the hospital from home so I wouldn’t need much winter clothes.”
She was in for a surprise. “Look, in the dead of winter, your skin will freeze in under a minute. That two-block walk will lead you to frostbite, numb legs, and frozen feet. Why don’t I take you to a store and you can pick out some winter gear, since I am your cabby for today?” Clyde couldn’t remain so serious and broke out into a laugh.
His laughter was infectious, and she joined him. “Yes, cabby, let’s fix me up with the proper attire, and then, please, I need to unpack and settle into my new place.”
“Deal.” He was enjoying her change in demeanor and was sure he caught a twinkle in her eye.
Within ten minutes, Clyde pulled up to The Hoarding Marmot. “This place has everything you want. It’s not too pricy but not cheap junk either. Would you like me to come in with you or should I wait here?” In the back of Clyde’s mind, he was praying she’d ask him to come in, but he didn’t want to push his luck. Why was she so intriguing to him? Was it her smile? Her eyes? Her incredible beauty? Or was it all the above? And there was something else about her.
“Thank you for the offer, but I’ll just be a minute. I’m not picky, so this shouldn’t take long.”
Clyde nodded and watched her open the truck door and hop out. He noticed she favored her left hand and kept her right hand tucked in her jacket sleeve. Maybe she was cold or left-handed? Through the shop window, he watched her try on a few winter jackets.
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