by Ireland Gill
I whipped open the sliding door and stomped out onto the patio. “What the hell are you doing, Hayden?!”
Hayden's head finally lifted in response. “Got out of the house. Just like you wanted.” He spat his answer. “You're welcome.” He bowed his head slightly at me, as if to mock me.
This attitude was new for him, and I didn't like it one bit. He displayed a cockiness far worse than I'd ever imagined him capable of, just in those few remarks, gestures. I’d been warned by Luka of the high emotions that would reveal themselves during the transition period of a Fading angel, and I wondered if this was what that meant; Hayden displaying a nasty side of himself, an angry side over which he had less control. Just. Like. Me.
“I'm guessing the disheveled house is due to your magic touch?” I tested.
“Guilty as charged,” he said with spite.
It was as if he'd gotten bold in a period of a few hours, premeditating just how he would handle my inevitable return to home that evening. It was almost as if he'd given up on his previously proven ways to handle our messes – ones that always worked. I admit, this may have been the biggest dispute of them all, the biggest secret as far as I knew, but for him to act this way was absolutely perplexing and unnerving.
“That's all you have to say to this?” I yelled in frustration. “Really?”
He lifted his hands and cocked his head. “What can I say? You wanted me out before you got back. I'm out. If you wish to grant me temporary entry, I'll clean up the entire house tonight. Good as new.” His eyes narrowed. “As if it never happened.”
I stared at him, mouth opened in awe.
Beau came into view inside the tent. He stood on all fours, still as a statue, peering out at me. I wondered what my dog's thoughts were. I wondered if he even had any at all relating to the matter at hand. I shook the thought quickly; he was a dog.
“Come on, Beau. Come inside.” I waved my hand to the door. His head slowly lowered, but he made no other movement. “Beau, come on, buddy.”
I couldn’t believe my eyes when he started barking back at me. Not his playful bark; it was his angry bark, the I’m-protecting-someone bark. Then he just stared at me for a brief moment and lay down, placing his head in Hayden’s lap.
I sucked air. “Traitor!” I yelled at my dog.
Hayden glanced down at Beau, then looked back at me once again. “Well, it’s certainly obvious whose side he’s on, isn’t it?”
If the angel hadn’t revved me up before, that was the comment that did it.
“You know what, Hayden? The asshole you're becoming is not something I anticipated. I suggest you get your damn wings back. Pronto!” I then yanked the sliding glass door closed with so much force it shook the room.
I could hear a muffled response from the angel that sounded something like “Non-refundable!” I crossed my arms and stood at the glass door, glaring at him.
“So, what was it you had to tell me?” Jaxon broke the silence.
“Huh?”
“You know, back at the car before we came in, about the rain around here. You said you'd have to explain that to me later.”
“Oh,” I said. “Yeah, there's kind of something that I can do since I've Crossed,” I said modestly. Jaxon raised his brow line expectantly. “The rain, I can control it when I want to.”
His eyes widened with excitement. “Seriously?”
I nodded. “I’ll show you.” I raised my hands, directing my energy above Hayden’s tent.
I let the rain start to fall, picking up speed as it hit the vinyl. I wished so hard that I could control the wind too, but this would just have to do.
Jaxon stared out at the yard. “This is amazing,” he said quietly.
I cranked up the rainfall and could hear the obnoxiously loud pattering on the tent. Hayden never looked up. He just kept on reading, and it infuriated me.
“Relentless! He is just relentless!” I yelled.
Jaxon belted out with laughter, holding his stomach and doubling over.
I shook my head, but couldn't keep a straight face. “I'm so glad you can find humor in this, Jaxon.”
Still hunched over, he raised his hand to me, breathing deeply and trying to sustain some sort of level of composure. “I'm sorry, Evika. This is just...sort of hilarious.”
I sighed and smirked at him. “Go figure. You find my anger hilarious just like the rest of the world.” I headed to the kitchen to decompress.
Jaxon called after me. “Remind me to never make you angry!”
“Duly noted!” I yelled back. “Hey, do you want anything to drink?”
“Sure, I’ll just take some water. And...” he paused for a few seconds. “Maybe some popcorn to watch the rest of the night play out.” He laughed.
“You’re really funny, little brother.” I couldn’t hold back my smile.
I'd gotten the guest room ready for Jaxon and showed him to his own bathroom so he could settle in. While he was showering, I'd dug up some of my old journals and placed them on his bed, as promised. It felt good to let him see a peace of me that I didn't have to hide. Although, he seemed to know everything about what he shouldn't have known about my life anyway, so I guess it wasn't much of a stretch. But the fact that he wanted to know something about me, that was what made me jovial.
I heard my phone ping on the night stand. I grunted as I saw it was a text from Hayden. I hit “open” to see a picture of a view from inside the tent, showing the rain falling outside the opening.
So, are you still mad at me?
I’d forgotten I hadn’t stopped the rain. I went to the window and waved my hand, putting the downpour to a halt.
Another text came through. Evika...I was torn b/w what I'm SUPPOSED to do and what I WANTED to do.
I rolled my eyes. I texted back. Oh boo hoo, the insufferable life of a G.A.
It was quiet for a while after that. I lay on the bed, restless. I understood this was more than just Hayden. This was the Council as well, my mother, my father, everyone. I tried to understand, and really hoped, that there was a good reason for keeping some of my past as a secret, but I couldn't think of anything that would take precedence over knowing my family. Keeping my twin brother away from me? It should have been deemed a crime as far as the Council was concerned. I mean, weren't they holy and good? What a crock. All of it was. My phone pinged again.
And I’m truly sorry. Can we just talk? I read the text over and over. I wanted to tell Hayden I loved him. I wanted to accept his apology. And yes, I wanted to talk and I wanted to know all of the things that he said he would finally tell me and Jaxon now that he had to. But I wasn’t over being angry yet. I needed more time to be furious with him.
I almost didn’t understand love. How can you be so insanely pissed off and hateful toward the one you love, yet feel so incredibly guilty for feeling that way? Like it’s wrong to have any other feeling than just love for them.
I pondered on the witty things I could text back to him. I honestly just wanted to make a voice recording of my screaming for a good thirty seconds, but of course that would be deemed the most immature way to handle the situation, and probably more childish than what I'd already done with the rain. I turned off the lamp and got comfortable under the covers. I hoped that would give Hayden his answer.
I shut my eyes and tried clearing my head so I could just go to sleep. My body curled up on my side of the bed until I realized I had the entire mattress to myself. I let out a devilish laugh and sprawled myself over the middle of the mattress. As much as it felt good to stretch and feel the entire bed without restriction, it somewhat felt wrong to me, that empty space. Then, there was another ping from my phone once again.
Sweet dreams, Pony-girl, it said. I narrowed my eyes, thinking about Hayden out in that tent, wanting to straighten this out with me so badly. Then it hit me; he was going to get into my dreams.
I texted back to him. Don't even think about it, Hayden.
What are you talking about?
I know what you’re scheming. Forget it.
I'm not scheming. I am just wishing you sweet dreams.
I rolled my eyes. He was trying to play 'the innocent.' Whatever. I flicked my eyes to the window and turned on the rain again in the back yard.
Okay. I was being so mean, but this really was the only way for me to get out the frustration. He deserved it. I closed my eyes and let the sounds of the rain calm me. It would stop once I fell asleep anyway.
The phone pinged again. I was honestly tired of these games, even though I was letting them continue, but I couldn't help myself. I grabbed the phone off of the nightstand and read the text from Hayden.
Although...I can’t make any promises if you won’t let me back in tonight.
“Okay, that is it!” I yelled. God, he infuriated me. My blood pressure raised to a point where I was too hot to even try to sleep anymore. I was going to have to pull an all-nighter to keep him out of my head. I wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of cornering me in my dreams and trying to work things out between us. I needed more time. He should have known that. His persistence was driving me nuts. All evening out with Jaxon and I was still an angerball.
I hastily threw the covers off of myself and hopped out of bed and down the hall to the guest room. The door was shut, but I saw the light of the lamp shining under the crack of the door. Jaxon was still up. I knocked lightly.
“Yeah?” I heard his muffled voice and opened the door, peeking my head through to see him sitting up in the bed with one of my journals.
“Hey, Jax,” I smiled, “I can’t sleep, so I was gonna stay up for a while and maybe watch a movie. You want to hang out with me downstairs? I'll make that popcorn.”
His smile was so radiant. He was so adorable. “Sure!” he said enthusiastically. Hadn't this boy gotten enough of me? I took in his attire and smiled. He was wearing a plain, white t-shirt and navy blue, flannel pants with little, yellow ducks all over them.
“What?” he asked as he hopped off the bed.
“Nothin',” I said, “You’re just adorable.” Wow, that came out like water, but Jaxon was a person I didn't feel like I had to filter anything with. I felt like I just knew him already.
He gave me a smug expression as he walked out of the room. “I guess I am pretty cute, huh?”
I laughed. “No doubt.”
We headed down the stairs to the kitchen and I automatically started grabbing the pan and the butter to melt for the popcorn.
“Oh, I should ask first. Do you like extra butter? I melt some and pour it on top. It's just like at the theater!”
He smirked. “I can’t say no to that.”
I laughed. “You're right. Hey, go ahead and pick a movie on Netflix or one of the other apps.”
“Will do. Comedy?”
“Definitely,” I agreed.
We watched Role Models. Jaxon had never seen it and it was refreshing to watch him see it for the first time. His laugh echoed throughout the room. I was almost enjoying watching my brother more than the movie. The sound of his laughter made me smile. He’d take a handful of popcorn to the face and have to let his belly laugh come to a stop before he could eat again. It was as if the house was now blessed with a new innocence.
After the movie ended, we talked about some of our favorite movies and television shows. We both discovered that Finding Nemo had been our favorite animated film of all time.
Although I was nearing the end of my alertness and felt my eyes getting heavy, I was determined to stay up as long as I could. I wanted to be sure Hayden had no chance of visiting me. I turned to Jaxon and saw him yawn as I turned and started flipping through television channels to see what was on at 2 a.m.
I put on the Food Network and we watched reruns of “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives.” We talked about how great “smell-a-vision” and “taste-a-vision” would be to mankind and all of the great places to which we'd been to eat. I told him about some of the great places in Cleveland and surrounding cities that I really missed, like Swensons, Melt, and some others I rattled off.
“Omigosh, Jax. Swensons is the best burger you will ever taste in your life. Hands down, the Galley Boy is the best burger in America.”
“Never been, and need to go. We should take a trip up there some time.”
I smiled. “We should. I can drag you to one of my favorite places for mussels.”
“Really? You like mussels?”
“Don't you?” I asked him, shocked. I guess, even as twins, we couldn't be completely identical.
He wrinkled his nose. “Seafood. Shellfish. Not my thing.”
“Well, on second thought, you didn't have Joel as a roommate. He'd make me try everything under the sun and I eventually started to like weird stuff. I was like his little guinea pig.” I laughed and I sighed, thinking about how normal my life was months ago, thinking about how much I had to tell him...and couldn’t tell him.
Jaxon looked at me inquisitively, as if assessing something. “Is that who you lived with before all of this started?”
I gave him a weak smile. He asked me the question as if he could sense I was longing for something. I guess I wasn’t very good at hiding how I felt. “Yup. My best friend. But, he’s in Paris now.”
He looked at me curiously. “So, why are you really up?”
I looked at him seriously. “I need him to leave me alone,” I nodded to the window, then I realized I would have to explain. “He can sort of get into my dreams if he wants to. So I am being my stubborn self as long as I can.”
“He can do that, visit your dreams?” Jaxon asked, surprised.
“Yeah.” I nodded. “But we made an agreement a while back that he wasn't allowed to do it anymore because it was the only time I had to myself.”
A grin started forming on my brother’s face. “So this is the typical relationship between a girl and her Guardian, huh?”
I couldn't contain my smile. It did seem rather ridiculous how childish it was. “I don't think using my and Hayden’s relationship as an example is a very good idea.” I laughed.
“Well, you love him. So you’ll have to forgive him and let him back in some time, you know,” he said.
“I know.” I sighed and looked out the window. “But I still need time to process all of this.”
“Well, I'm digging the couch right now and I don't mind staying up for a while longer with you if you want the company.” Jaxon raised his eyebrows.
“I'd love your company, Jax.”
We were quiet for a while as we watched an old episode of “Unwrapped.” Mark Summers took us to the factory where they made Snickers bars. I looked over at Jaxon and saw his head drooped to his shoulder, eyes closed, mouth open, breathing deeply, and I smiled at the sight. My instinct was to “tuck him in,” so I pulled the throw from the other couch and covered him up. His bare feet went uncovered, but it sufficed. I wanted to take pictures of him sleeping like that, my twin brother. But I figured I'd have plenty more time to make memories like these from now on, so I'd skip being so invasive for now.
I relaxed again on the other couch and tried my hardest to stay awake, flipping through the channels trying to find something to hold my interest, but I soon found that my eyes were struggling to stay open. I knew I'd have to give in and figured Hayden would have given up by now anyway. It was almost four in the morning. I let my eyes shut and laid my head on a pillow. I could see the television's change in brightness through my eyelids until I was sound asleep.
I found myself standing on black asphalt, surrounded by various flickering lights, carnival music, and moving rides. I was somewhere I only vaguely remembered as a child, but couldn’t quite place the name. The fair was void of any visitors and made for an eerie place to be at nighttime. In this dream of my memory, I was utterly alone. . .or so I thought.
“Evika,” a distant voice from behind me made me freeze in place. I turned around slowly and focused. I saw him standing there in a maroon Cleveland Cavaliers jacket. He held a ci
garette in his right hand and brought it to his mouth, puffing briefly. I observed his shaved head and the rugged look of his five o'clock shadow which made his oval-shaped face seem longer. He blew out the smoke he'd inhaled and smiled widely, walking toward me.
It was my father.
And I was speechless.
Chapter Four Reunion
“You're not going to say 'hi' to your dad?” he asked as he flicked the rest of his cigarette onto the ground.
“I-I'm sorry,” I could barely speak. “You’re just the last person I’d expected to be in my dreams.”
He sighed and gave a slight shrug. “I asked for a favor – just this once – to see you.”
I narrowed my eyes, incredulous, and curious as to who it was who’d helped my father.
He read my expression for a moment. “Costello gave Hayden permission to grant me...access.” And there it was.
I narrowed my eyes again and didn't say anything.
He ignored my expression. “Do you remember this place?” He asked as he looked around.
“Sort of.” I shrugged. “But not much.” I tried to sound disinterested.
“It was where I took you a few days before my Final Death.” As if that wasn’t a morbid statement, he just smiled and focused his eyes on something behind and above me. “It was your first time on the Ferris wheel.”
I didn’t turn to look at the ride.
He observed me once again. “You're upset with me,” he concluded.
I shifted my weight. “Well, it's just that my twin showed up on my doorstep today. I have a lot to take in right now, along with seeing my father for the first time since I was, what, four?”
He nodded slowly. “I see.” He took a few steps away and toward the unmoving merry-go-round. “Evika, that's exactly why I came to see you.”
