It took Connor a moment to remember that he couldn’t, and another to remember why . “You didn’t have to do that for me,” he said, “but I appreciate that you did.” Doing it for the cause, not wanting to overshadow what they were raising money for, that was easier to catch hold of.
“Shall we dance, then?” Connor asked. Despite his usual hesitance, he wanted to take Ashley out on the floor, and to watch the dress swirl around her as they moved.
Ashley gave him a small, suspicious look. For a moment Connor wondered if she actually would say ‘no’, but then Ashley nodded. “Yeah, yeah, let’s dance,” she agreed, giving Connor’s hand a squeeze. “But don’t step on my toes, okay?” It wasn’t something he could promise for definite, but Connor could definitely promise to try not to.
Having Ashley in his arms felt wonderful, and as she’d promised, she moved easily across the dancefloor, leading Connor without letting it look like she was leading. Having her so close, his hand resting on warm skin left bare by the backless dress, also felt like a temptation Connor couldn’t risk giving in to. Ashley was beautiful and lovely. Connor hoped they would stay friends, whenever the act between them had to end. He didn’t want to ruin that.
He was relieved when Ashley brought them to a stop, sending Connor off to fetch them something to drink. Just relieved, he told himself, and not at all regretting that he’d probably never have a reason to dance with Ashley again after tonight.
Chapter Six
The gala was like nothing Ashley had been to before. Sure, she’d been to some events that required nice dresses and good posture, but nothing like this . The charity gala that she was accompanying Connor to was fancy . The sort of fancy that Ashley hadn’t even been too sure how to dress for. Thankfully, when Connor’s advice had mostly been ‘wear a dress’, Ashley had been able to get in touch with one of the girlfriends of someone else in the team. Evie, Nilssy’s girlfriend, had been precisely what Ashley had needed.
“Oh my God, is that the dress? It looks amazing!” Evie exclaimed the moment she spotted Ashley. Connor had gone off to get them some drinks, though Ashley suspected his real aim was to hang out with some of the other guys. She didn’t mind, mostly because it gave her the opportunity to thank Evie properly for all the help the woman had shown Ashley.
“All the thanks go to you,” Ashley replied with a laugh and Evie shook her head.
“No, no, I just made suggestions, you’re the one who picked it and the one who wears it so well,” she commented. Reaching out, she turned Ashley around so she could inspect the dress better. “You look hot !” Evie announced making Ashley laugh.
Turning back, she gave Evie’s dress a look. “So do you.” Evie looked amazing , the black dress hugging her in all the right ways. The compliment made Evie grin.
“Hugo certainly agreed,” she nodded. It took Ashley a moment to remember that that was Nilssy’s name . Hearing about the other guys on the team from Connor meant that Ashley forgot they had real names and not just the team nicknames. “What about Connor? Does he love it?”
That made Ashley almost instantly blush. Connor had definitely looked like he liked it. Her mind also helpfully supplied a reminder of the way Connor had brushed his fingers over her back, where the dress didn’t cover it, sending shivers down Ashley’s spine.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” Evie laughed.
“Oh, um, sorry. Yes. Connor liked the dress,” Ashley said blushing even harder, which only made Evie laugh.
“Ah, young love,” she teased. Even though Ashley knew that her relationship with Connor was fake, it was difficult to not let her stomach flip, to not let her cheeks redden more, like Evie’s words were true . “How are things going?” Evie asked, drawing Ashley out of the thoughts circling inside her head.
She paused rather than answering straight away. Then a smile, quite by itself, settled against her lips. “Yeah, things are good. I think I’ve even learned hockey rules by now,” she joked. It had been just under two months since she’d first met Connor, so Ashley had had plenty of time to learn. And she had seen numerous hockey games.
“Oh, God, yeah,” Evie nodded. “When I first met Hugo and we realized we were soulmates, I thought he’d be so disappointed because I knew nothing about hockey. But now I’m like the biggest fan,” she laughed, making Ashley smile.
“How long have you been together?” She asked curiously. Evie was lovely and from what Ashley had seen she and Nilssy were a good match. Even if Nilssy often seemed stoic in comparison to Evie’s chattiness.
“It will be six years at Christmas.” The smile that accompanied Evie’s words was almost blinding. If Ashley had had any doubts about Evie’s feelings for Nilssy (she hadn’t), this would’ve convinced her the woman was completely in love.
Ashley honestly couldn’t imagine being with someone for that long - and she was aware that six years wasn’t that long. Her parents had been married for well over two decades and were just as happy now as Ashley remembered them ever being. The relationships Ashley had had, however, mostly dwindled out within a few months.
“Do you think it’s different because you’re soulmates?” Ashley asked in a way that she wouldn’t have asked anyone who truly knew her feelings on soulmates. She was... curious. The pretense of being someone’s soulmate had turned out to be a lot easier than Ashley had originally anticipated. A lot different, too.
Evie, to give her credit, did seem to pause to think about Ashley’s question. It made Ashley like the other woman even more. Evie was sweet, friendly, chatty, but she was also smart . Ashley liked that she didn’t just seem to jump onto the ‘happy train’ that so many people who had found their soulmates seemed to preach.
“I think it is different, yes,” Evie nodded. “But it’s still... we still have to work on things, you know? It’s still a relationship so not everything always fits perfectly. We had more struggles at the beginning, but now we’re... we’re pretty good.” There was that smile again that made Evie’s whole face light up. It infectiously made Ashley smile, too.
“But it’s worth it?” Ashley guessed.
“Oh, definitely,” Evie laughed before her expression turned more serious. “Are you and Connor having problems?”
“No!” Ashley rushed to shake her head before she really had time to recognize what she was saying. When she did think about it, Ashley realized that it was... kind of true. She and Connor didn’t have problems. They had had one argument and they’d sat down and talked about it. It was... actually pretty healthy. Apart from the whole fake dating and how they weren’t really soulmates.
“Good,” Evie nodded. “You’ve been very good for Connor. Not just because of the press, though I have heard that you’ve been making his public image so good that the other guys are getting jealous.” It was definitely a joke if the way Evie winked at Ashley was any indication.
“Well, it’s hard work,” she joked back, making Evie laugh.
“No, but really. Connor looks... happier. Nilssy even said so and it has to be pretty obvious for him to notice something.”
That made Ashley’s stomach flip, butterflies fluttering inside it. Knowing that she might make Connor look happier, to a point where his Captain said so... it made Ashley feel good about herself in a way she really hadn’t expected. It felt... special. She found it difficult to remind herself that this wasn’t real . She and Connor weren’t a real couple, it was all just pretend. Yet the butterflies in Ashley’s stomach felt far from pretend.
“He’s... different than I expected,” Ashley admitted, realizing that it was true . Ashley hadn’t really had a chance to speak to anyone but Connor about their relationship. It was different with him because they both accepted that this was fake, that it had a deadline on it, that they weren’t soulmates .
“Oh?” Evie’s raised eyebrow encouraged Ashley to continue, a smile playing on her lips.
“He’s sweet and caring. I guess, I kind of expected him to be more... rebellious?”
“Ah,” Evie nodded. “Yeah, that’s you.” That made Ashley frown and Evie laughed. “Connor’s always been... maybe not quite a party animal. He certainly doesn’t have the claim of sleeping around the most - that’s James, in case you’re into gossip,” Evie winked at Ashley. “I don’t think many people who don’t know him really well would describe him as sweet or caring.”
That seemed ridiculous to Ashley. She almost jumped to Connor’s defense but Evie held her hand up to stop her, clearly anticipating it. “I’m not saying he’s not , just that you are the reason he shows it.” That... made sense, but also made Ashley feel weird .
“Anyway, I need to go find Hugo to make him dance with me. I swear that man hides from me at these things just so I won’t force him to waltz,” Evie announced with a laugh. Ashley was too distracted to really do much more than offer Evie a smile. “We’ll chat later,” the other woman promised before walking off to presumably find her boyfriend.
The conversation left Ashley feeling confused. Obviously, Evie didn’t know that her dating Connor was fake, but even so, her words had felt so nice . Ashley realized that she wanted that, she wanted to be the reason Connor looked happier. And that was a very dangerous wish to have.
Connor had been pretty clear with Ashley that he was fake dating her because she was his fake soulmate. That’s what he needed, not a fake girlfriend. And most certainly not a real , girlfriend, right? But it was hard to get rid of that idea circling around Ashley’s mind.
Shaking her head, as if that might get rid of the thought, Ashley decided to go see if Connor, too, wanted to have another dance. And if, maybe, somewhere in the back of her mind, she hoped that his fingers would brush over her bare back again? Then so be it.
Honestly, Ashley hadn’t expected Connor to be very good when it came to dancing. Nor had he really exceeded her expectations in that. What she had found unexpected was how much he let her lead the dance. One of Ashley’s exes had been pretty annoyed at her the one time she’d tried to lead them in a dance (because he’d been awful at it), and Ashley had somewhat expected that reaction again. Connor didn’t react badly. If anything, he seemed to enjoy that she led since it meant most of his mistakes went unnoticed.
It was also very easy to just forget everything else around them as the two of them spun circles on the dance floor. Connor’s hand - as Ashley had hoped - was neatly settled against her lower back, fingers soft against her skin. They felt hot in the most pleasurable of ways. Ashley kept accidentally forgetting how much she shouldn’t be enjoying it.
“May I interrupt?” Someone asked tapping on Connor’s shoulder just as the song finished. Ashley was a little surprised to find that she hadn’t even realized it was nearing the end, so absorbed in being close to Connor.
Connor gave the interrupter - Blake, Ashley recognized - a suspicious look, but there was a playfulness in that, too. He looked at Ashley, and she realized it was to see if she was okay with it. That somehow made her heart feel so much larger in her chest. She gave a soft nod and Connor looked back at Blake.
“I suppose,” Connor drew out. “No funny business,” he warned, making Ashley snort and Blake shake his head.
“I’ll try to resist,” he promised before taking Ashley’s hand from Connor so he could lead them into the next dance as the music started. Blake was, Ashley realized, a great deal better at dancing than Connor. Yet, she couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed at the loss of Connor’s touch.
Blake spun Ashley round much more gently than Connor had. That was almost definitely because he just knew how to balance himself in a dance better. It was interesting and Ashley wondered if it helped with hockey. Then again, despite Connor’s lack of grace in dancing, he was very good on the ice.
“I wanted to apologize to you,” Blake said, making Ashley frown at him. Whatever she had expected him to say - not much, really - she hadn’t expected that .
“Apologize? For what?”
As far as Ashley knew, there wasn’t really anything that Blake owed her an apology for . The almost crestfallen look on his face definitely encouraged Ashley to hear him out. She waited patiently, watching as Blake clearly struggled to decide how to say whatever he wanted to say.
“It was my fault,” he started with and really, that cleared nothing up. Blake seemed to realize as much from Ashley’s confused look so he carried on, “It was my fault Connor’s soulmark got exposed. I didn’t do it intentionally, but it was still my fault and I’m really sorry, I know it... You had to go public because of that. Because of me.”
Whatever Ashley had expected, not that she had really known what to expect, Blake apologizing to her for accidentally exposing Connor’s soulmark really wasn’t it. Blake seemed genuinely worried that she might be angry. While Ashley understood why , she really... wasn’t.
“I know we don’t know each other well,” Ashley started, careful in what she chose to say. “But... I’m not really into the whole soulmate thing. I don’t cover my soulmark,” she did glance down at the sticker on her arm, “normally,” Ashley clarified. “So yes, the media attention was probably not great and I don’t think Connor would’ve chosen for the world to see his soulmark, but...”
Ashley paused, making sure Blake looked at her and gave him a small smile.
“Connor and I aren’t together because we’re soulmates.” And wasn’t that the truth. “We’re together because we like each other. And part of that is being in public together. Yeah, you sped the process up, but it would’ve happened anyway.”
It was surprising just how much that didn’t feel like a lie. The only reason Ashley had met Connor was because of his soulmark being exposed. So in a way, she realized, if it hadn’t been for Blake they might’ve never met at all. That somehow felt wrong , like a sharp ache.
“You’re good together,” Blake smiled and Ashley wondered if he’d talked to Evie. “He smiles a lot more now, it’s kind of... well, weird really, but I guess also nice.” That made Ashley laugh and she let Blake lead them into another spin. It was... exciting, she realized. Knowing that she was a reason Connor smiled.
As the song finished, Blake gave Ashley another look. “You sure you don’t want me to apologize again?”
“Yes,” she laughed. “I promise you, I’m not angry at you.” Ashley really wasn’t and truthfully, she doubted she would’ve been even if she’d been Connor’s real girlfriend. Real soulmate. All of the feelings pressed forward, though, making her think about it so much more. Want it more , she thought.
With the song - and the apology - over, Ashley excused herself to go to the bathroom. Escape, really. As if hiding out in the bathroom was going to stop the sudden need she felt inside her.
Ashley hadn’t expected all these comments about how good she was for Connor to affect her so much. And yet, she felt like she wanted more . She wanted other people to also think that she was good for Connor. And more than anything, Ashley realized, she wanted Connor to want her to be good for him.
Running a hand over her dress as if to straighten it, Ashley took a deep breath. She could do this. She could not get attached. They weren’t soulmates, so...
Except Ashley didn’t care about soulmates, right?
“Well, fuck.”
Ashley didn’t really have a game plan per se, but she had... a plan. Kind of. In comparison to the very detailed plans she’d normally have, this did almost feel like no plan at all, but she was still going with it. Most of it involved talking to Connor. Ashley needed to find out if... if maybe this could be something more than just fake, if Connor wanted it to be something more.
She’d found him talking to a couple of his teammates, asking if she could steal him away. They’d teased Connor, but Ashley had come to learn that it was a very important part of Connor’s friendships with the guys. Neither attempted to stop Ashley from taking Connor’s hand and pulling him with her, though.
“Do you think we could find somewhere quiet to talk?” Ashley asked, looking around.
/>
Connor tensed briefly, but it didn’t last long enough for Ashley to comment. Instead, she let Connor take her arm and lead her away from the crowds. “They’ve always got a room open,” he told her. “In case one of us spills something down ourselves and needs to change a shirt.” He gave Ashley a teasing sort of look. “It happens more than you’d think. Last year they served these fancy sliders with cheese cooked into the middle of them, it was a nightmare.”
It took Connor a few tries before he located an open door which led into a sort of staging area. There were piles of napkins and tablecloths, but also a rack of suit jackets. “Is everything alright?” Connor asked once he’d closed the door behind them. “Do we need to go over strategy or something?”
Ashley almost laughed at that. Strategy . Yeah, sure, because that was what they did, right? They had a strategy. A plan . Except Ashley was about to fuck the whole plan up. Or well, she was seriously strategizing to fuck the whole plan up. It struck Ashley just how good Connor looked and he was so close to her now that she could smell his cologne.
“No,” she shook her head. “Or I guess, maybe?” Because that was kind of why Ashley had gotten Connor in a cupboard with her. It was a big cupboard but it was still definitely a cupboard. As Ashley thought more and more about cupboards she realized she was most definitely procrastinating from doing something. Or even saying something.
“Everything’s fine.” Everything was fine. “I just wanted...” Ashley bit her lip because she wasn’t actually sure she knew how to explain anything. So she decided to do something she felt Connor would understand better anyway.
With her hand against Connor’s shirt, Ashley pulled him down, her lips crashing against his.
Game Plan Page 9