by Regan Black
“Programs like Keller’s proposition need a clear goal and a timeline. Otherwise, the rest of us are out here chasing our tails or cleaning up unintended consequences. Keller campaigned on big promises about safety and cleanup. Resolving the homeless situation should be about the people, not just the curb appeal.”
She made an excellent point. “Lara volunteered for a couple street cleanups. Not people, but trash and graffiti. She sent me pictures.”
“You never mentioned that. Can I see them?”
“It was her freshman year,” he said. “I didn’t think it was relevant.”
“Do you have the pictures?” she asked. “It might spark another place for me to look. She’s staying somewhere nearby, but I have yet to find her.”
“Sure. They are all backed up on the cloud on my laptop.”
She looked at his plate, then raked those eyes over him. “Are you full?”
“I was going to take the leftovers upstairs.”
“That works,” she said.
By the time they reached the room, there was a sizzle in his veins that had nothing to do with new ideas of where to look for his sister. He was eager to be close to Aubrey. Since the stabbing, she treated him with kid gloves, giving him space to heal and time to think. There had been kisses, but far more rest, even though they were sharing a bed. His body was starting to demand more.
When they were shoulder to shoulder at his computer, he breathed her in, steadied as always by her presence. He was going to miss her when he returned to Cincinnati. Would she come with him if he asked? The idea of inviting her to move surged to the front of his mind. This city was in her blood, he knew that, could see it in her eyes whenever she spoke of her career or her personal interests.
He couldn’t help believing she shared the depth of feeling he had for her. She’d stuck around after he shared the worst skeleton in his closet. That had to mean something. He hadn’t said the L-word—it was way too soon for that declaration—but he was trying to show her in every moment.
His sister smiled at them from pictures with friends at events around campus and elsewhere. The floodgates opened as he shared what he remembered with Aubrey. It was startling to see the transformation through her two and a half years of college in Philly. “She really has changed,” he said, scrolling back to the most recent pictures.
“Can you go back to that first cleanup day?” Aubrey asked. She clicked on the picture and zoomed in, studying the background.
Leo was consumed with how happy and carefree his sister appeared, surrounded by friends in her old jeans and new college sweatshirt. Behind the group the trees blazed with autumn color.
“You’re lucky,” Aubrey said. “Who she is doesn’t seem to have changed a bit.”
He should probably take comfort in that and trust his sister to reach out when she was ready. It just wasn’t that easy, not the way things had unraveled. There was something at play he couldn’t see, something that kept Lara from giving him the reassurance she had to know he needed.
“Big heart,” he said. Leo reached for Aubrey’s free hand. “I am lucky to be her brother.” Catching her chin, he turned her face and rubbed his nose against hers. “Luckier still to have found you.”
“Leo.”
He wanted her, without his missing sister monopolizing their thoughts. He stood and tugged her along with him. “The first impression wasn’t my best, but the rest of it...” His voice trailed off as he pushed a hand into her hair and brought her mouth to his.
She slid her hands over the nape of his neck, her fingers sifting through his hair.
“Be with me tonight.” He skimmed his lips along the warm, silky column of her throat. “No research, no worries. Just you and me.” His hand trailed over her waist, over her hip, under the hem of that bold sweater.
“You’re sure we won’t do more damage?” She traced the line of his shoulders, his biceps.
“Not a chance,” he promised.
“You swear you’ll stop if it’s too much.”
“Not a chance,” he repeated, pulling her hips into his.
She laughed, the sultry sound music to his ears as they moved toward the bed.
This woman was one of a kind. He’d trusted her with everything, past and present. Being that open with her scared him as much as it thrilled him. He gave her all the tenderness she stirred in him, and with her body wrapped tightly around his, he knew she was where he was meant to be.
* * *
Aubrey drifted on a cloud of satisfaction. He was definitely feeling better and he made her feel incredible right down to her soul. She should be delighted, giddy even, but she knew it couldn’t last. With Leo she felt beautiful and strong, able to find a balance between her sunny view of the world and the reality. Just being near him, she experienced a joyful sense of belonging. It was like coming home.
Curled beside him, she rested her palm over his heart as hers slowly returned to a normal rhythm. He kissed her hair and she’d never felt so cherished.
“I love you,” he whispered, his fingertips caressing her shoulder.
For a moment everything inside her froze. He couldn’t mean it. Then her heart erupted into an ecstatic flutter. She loved him, too, but the words were locked behind some kind of haze in her mind. She could see them, but couldn’t get them out into the open.
Better if she didn’t reply. What sort of future could they have, even if Lara was found? Long-distance relationships were filled with pitfalls. She wanted to believe he meant it. Desperately wanted to cling to the gift he’d given her.
Love is enough.
Where had she heard that? Not on the job. Love definitely had not been enough to keep her ex from doing something stupid. Had that really been love?
Snuggling closer, she realized that old relationship had been nothing more than a bad impersonation of the real thing. Love could be enough. For now. Did it matter if they had days or years ahead of them? This time, just the two of them together, was priceless. If they never had more than this, she knew she’d never settle for anything less than real again.
She pressed a kiss to the warm skin of his chest, wrapped a leg around his and hoped he could feel the words she couldn’t speak.
Leo didn’t press her for a response, though he had to know she was awake. He continued to hold her, trailing his fingers over her bare skin as if he couldn’t get enough. Maybe she was as hard as Neil had claimed. Too much cop, not enough compassion. Only hours before she’d dragged his drug-dealing butt into the precinct in cuffs, he’d told her he loved her.
She hadn’t responded to the false declaration then; why couldn’t she be honest with herself and Leo now? He’d shared his worst personal moments and he deserved equal openness from her. “I really should explain.”
“Shh.” He tipped up her chin and kissed her. Sweet, soft. “No need.”
Oh, there was every need. She wriggled to sit up, tucking the sheet under her arms. “There’s one more factor that contributed to the suspension.”
He rolled to his side, eyes intent on her.
She swallowed. “A few years ago my boyfriend was dealing drugs. Practically right under my nose. I knew he smoked weed with his pals on the weekend, but I overlooked it. When I caught him dealing harder stuff, I hauled him straight to the precinct.”
He arched an eyebrow, didn’t say a word.
“Internal Affairs went through my life with a flea comb, looking for dirt. They still do periodically.”
He frowned, immediately leaping to her defense. “That’s not fair.”
“Maybe not, but it still happens, due to my overly trusting nature. I have a rep around the precinct for seeing the best of people, rather than the cold, hard truth.”
“Then they need glasses. You’re the best cop, the most dedicated, I’ve ever seen in action.”
She started to giggle
and couldn’t stop.
“What’s so funny?”
“A few of the cops I work with gave me rose-colored sunglasses as a gag gift,” she said when she’d caught her breath. She leaned over and kissed him. “And you might be a little biased.”
“Maybe,” he allowed, holding his thumb and finger about a half inch apart.
The quiet was gentle, easy, and she rested there, thinking about how to help Leo and his sister. The light glinted on the golden hair dusting his torso. Her hands tingled, recalling the heat and texture of him. She watched, fascinated as the honed muscles in his arm bunched when he pushed a hand through his hair. He really couldn’t be still unless he was asleep.
“You’re smiling,” he said, his knuckles grazing her cheekbone. “Why?”
She thought the top reasons were pretty obvious, considering where they were. “Your sister has good intentions, I’m sure of it.”
Leo grunted. “You don’t even know her, but you’re right.”
Aubrey felt like she did know her, though, after everything she’d learned from him and her interviews with people Lara interacted with as a volunteer. She wondered if Leo’s plans to take Lara home would work. “What does she plan to do with her poli-sci degree?”
“Assuming she finishes that degree, her plan was to ‘make a difference.’” He used air quotes. “Politics might have been in her long-term plans. She’d done an internship with one of the political analysis firms last summer and she enjoyed it. As you’ve learned, she really likes being in the thick of things. If Lara had her way, she would split her time between teaching at the high school or college level and charity work.”
She’d come to a similar conclusion after her last conversation with Professor Whitten. “Tough road,” Aubrey murmured. “But you said Lara has a knack for looking at the good in people.”
“Yes, she does. Maybe I’ll get her a pair of rose-colored glasses.”
Aubrey rolled her eyes. “She’ll take it as a compliment.”
“Like you did?”
He was massaging the tension from her palm, tension she didn’t even know she carried. Better to keep things light, to remember this was supposed to be about the two of them. “Exactly.”
“You’re in a similar, draining job situation with the PPD. Is there any sage advice I should try to impart when I do see Lara again?”
Aubrey took her time, wanting to give him the right words. “Dealing with the public can be stressful,” she said. “Balance is my advice. Charity work can be draining. Teaching can be draining,” she replied. “If your sister’s goal is to do both, I hope she finds enough reward in one endeavor to recharge and keep her energized for the other.”
“How do you find balance, Aubrey?”
He was completely focused on her again. For a moment she simply enjoyed the heady sensation. “Well, not every day is a good one, but I like to focus on the good people I meet every day.”
“Like me,” he teased.
She took his face in her hands. “Just like you.”
He smiled. “What happened to your ex?”
“He went to jail.” She anticipated the next question. “I handled everything up front and by the book, but the PPD doesn’t want another scandal. By getting personally involved with you, a man tied to an open case, I make them twitchy.”
“What do you want?” He stroked her arm, elbow to wrist and back again.
“I want to find your sister so you can get some peace. Then I want to get back on the job. I don’t know what I’d do without the PPD and my normal beat. It’s who I am.”
“Why?”
“Why did I become a cop?” She chewed on her lip when he nodded. His touch lit fires, soothed them, lit more. The story just flowed right out of her. “My friends and I were mugged outside a movie theater back in high school. The cops who intervened were an inspiration to me.” It sounded corny, but it was the simple truth.
“Did they catch the mugger?” He scooted closer and kissed the back of her hand, her fingertips.
“Yes,” she murmured. “I testified,” she added, her voice quaking more from his touch than the memories. “One of my friends is agoraphobic now. We do movies at her place.”
He kissed her with so much tenderness she thought she’d fly apart.
“Then that’s what we’ll do.” His embrace kept her grounded.
“What do you mean?” She was breathless from the magic of his mouth.
“We’ll find Lara and get you back on the job.” He kissed her again, sparking fresh need through her body. “And we’ll start first thing tomorrow.”
Chapter 10
The next morning Leo poured himself another cup of coffee and turned off the television. The morning news wasn’t giving him anything helpful. He checked in at the airport in Cincinnati, assuring them he would be back on the job soon. They all sent their concerns and hopes that Lara would be found.
Last night, in Aubrey’s embrace, was the first time he’d felt remotely like himself since the stabbing. He’d meant what he’d said about finding Lara and clearing Aubrey’s name within the PPD. There was a way to do both.
Analysis was his strong suit, though he usually applied himself to business interests. Operations and logistics at the airport were far easier to figure out than emotions and personal motivations. But Aubrey was special, to him as well as countless other people. Seeing her in action around the neighborhood proved that.
He loved her and he acknowledged that factor played into his decisions. That didn’t mean it hampered his ability or limited his choices. Yes, it would’ve been cleaner if he’d met her in Cincinnati or under better circumstances here in Philly. He would’ve preferred it if discovering all the good stuff about her and about being with her wasn’t also tied up in the mess with Lara’s disappearance.
Still, he didn’t regret telling her how he felt. He didn’t even mind that she hadn’t given him the words back. One of his therapists had told him love was always better shared than hidden away. He hadn’t expected her to reply in kind; hadn’t expected much of anything really. What he’d received instead was the gift of her trust as she shared the story of her ex. Although things were somewhat unsettled emotionally, her affection for him was clear and knowing she trusted him, experiencing her sincere care and concern, eased his mind and his heart.
If she wanted back on the PPD, despite the way they doubted and treated her, he’d help make that happen, even if it meant he couldn’t be with her in the long run. It would be worth it to know she was happy.
At last, his cell phone rang. Seeing Grant’s name on the screen, he answered immediately.
“I have a lead on Lara,” Grant said, wasting no time on the pleasantries.
Leo did a double take. He’d expected news about Aubrey’s situation. “Good. Good,” he repeated, mentally shifting gears. “Where is she?”
“It’s more about where we expect her to show up,” Grant said cryptically. “I just left Professor Whitten’s office.”
“I knew that jerk was involved,” Leo snarled. “What did he say?”
“He wasn’t eager to cooperate, but he did admit he’s storing her belongings. Free of charge. Also, he meets with her every week in a park near the campus.”
Leo swore. He imagined breaking up the weekly meeting by teaching Lara’s professor a lesson or two in common sense, but this wasn’t the time for that daydream. “Tell me where and when.”
“It might not be that easy,” Grant continued. “He promised Lara hefty research credit for doing this. Her job is to gather in-depth, firsthand experience with the homeless population and hand over real-time statistics to verify the city’s claims about assistance.”
“In winter,” Leo grumbled and pinched the bridge of his nose. That was his sister all the way. How many times had she declared that accountability was the only way to make real chang
e?
“I had the same thought. He claims he’ll put her name first on the paper,” Grant said, his voice loaded with sarcasm.
“What a stand-up guy.” Leo tapped his foot, eager to get out there and save his sister from her warped mentor. “My sister’s out there risking her life for his glory. Rosie at the soup kitchen told us from the start Lara was a good girl trying to help.”
“That’s the picture everyone is painting,” Grant confirmed.
Leo walked to the window. “Are you suggesting we leave her to it?”
“No,” Grant said quickly. “The professor came clean because Lara missed her last meeting. In light of Aubrey’s suspension, I think the sooner we bring Lara in, the better. My gut tells me something bigger is in play.”
“Mine, too.” The new information worried him that someone didn’t want Lara’s firsthand reports going public. Odds were good it was the same someone who didn’t want Aubrey to find Lara.
“Do you have someone watching the park?” Leo asked.
“I do. I’ve sent this information to Aubrey, as well. I think it’s best if you stay out of it. The professor is convinced she’s committed to seeing this project through.”
“And if she sees me, she’ll bolt?”
“That’s my fear,” Grant said.
“With good reason,” Leo admitted, trying to be objective. “I’m all kinds of overprotective. She knows that and she damn well should’ve told me or sent me a convincing message.”
Grant chuckled. “So she brought this search on herself?”
“Let’s go with that, sure. It makes me sound less like a helicopter parent.”
“Family is important,” Grant said. “If my sister did something like this, I’d be pulling my hair out, too.”
“I’m not good at waiting,” he said. “Let me know the minute you have something, please.” He wasn’t happy about sitting back, but if it increased their chances of getting Lara back safe, he’d do it.
“Hang in there,” Grant said. “I have a couple people headed that way,” Grant said. “Aubrey will be in place, too. When Lara shows up, they’ll bring her in so we can hash this out.”
