Knowing his club, Drum reads us all pretty well and starts to wrap up. “Okay, brothers. That’s all we can do for tonight. We’ll get together tomorrow to go through some specifics. But before we do, I think the VP has something to say.” He cocks an eyebrow in my direction. He’d given me until Friday to get my thoughts straight about Wheels; now he seems to be moving it up the agenda.
As we’d hurtled back at speeds a Harley wasn’t really meant to go, with Wheels literally hanging on for dear life behind me, the fear for her safety had given me clarity on what she means to me. We’d escaped this time, literally with our lives, so I have absolutely no problem letting my brothers know where I stand. Giving a cough to clear my throat, and even in these circumstances unable to keep the smile from my face, I have no problem telling them, “Yeah, well, I’m claimin’ Wheels. As my ol’ lady.”
Now it’s common knowledge I’d started fucking her, but I’m probably one of the last they thought would take the next step and put my head in the old lady trap, so the indrawn breaths and gasps of disbelief―with the exception of Peg, who must have guessed it was on the cards―doesn’t surprise me.
“Anyone gonna have a problem with Wraith taking Wheels as his ol’ lady?”
Again, I found myself holding my breath, but the number of ‘fuck noes’ and ‘go for it mans’ that echoed around made me feel relieved my brothers had my back. When Drum had brought the gavel down for the last time dismissing us, my back grew sore from the number of times it was slapped as I made my way through the room and out of the door.
Chapter Twenty
Sophie…
Hank’s dead. And Peg’s injured. After the great time I’d had in Utah and all my positive thoughts on the way back, I was still shaking when Horse got me back to my room. What the bloody hell have I got myself into? What kind of trouble is the club in that they’d get into a gunfight on the road?
Why did they chase Wraith and me almost all the way back to the Tucson clubhouse? What would have happened if the rest of the club hadn’t met us halfway and run them off? Just how close was my own brush with death tonight?
My leg’s throbbing and my chest aches from where the seat belt cut into me. As thoughts churn through my head, suddenly my pains take second place and I grow cold as the dreadful notion hits me. Was it me they were after? There is a contract out on me after all.
A gasp escapes my lips, drawing Horse’s attention, and he’s by my side in seconds. “What is it, babe? What’s up?”
“Was it my fault, Horse?” As his brow creases in confusion I continue, “Were they after me? Is it my fault Hank died?”
“Oh, babe.” He pulls me to him, and I lean into his comfort as he gently brushes his hand down my hair. “I don’t know. Let Drum and the boys sort it out. There’s no point thinking on it; we don’t know what the club’s up to at the moment. And even if it was to do with you, the club offered you protection…”
“They offered to hide me, Horse, not die for me.”
“Hey, wait until we know more before you beat yourself up. And no, nothing was your fault. Even if St John-Davies was behind it, that’s not on you, sweetheart. You’re an innocent in all this, caught up in someone else’s dirty business.”
“I was so happy, Horse, coming back from Utah. I had hope that I could get my life back on track for the first time in months.”
“That’s great to hear! And hang onto those feelings, Sophie. Whatever the reason for tonight’s shooting, don’t let go of those positives.”
“But I can’t, can I? If I hadn’t come to the compound, Hank would be…”
“You don’t know it was anything to do with you. And even if it was, do you think Hank would want that? Don’t you ever fucking say that you shouldn’t be here, babe. Hank went down fighting for his club, doing what he’d signed up to do, just like any soldier in war. You’re alive, don’t think of fucking wasting what he did for you. Whatever the reason for the attack, he died to give you the chance to get away. You owe it to him to live, and live full.”
Hearing him put it like that makes me feel even guiltier. “Don’t waste your chance at life, some don’t have it so good. My wife…”
I knew his wife had died, but not what had happened to her. “How did she die, Horse?”
I think it’s only to help take my thoughts off the horrific night I’ve had that he opens up to me, and his words explain why he’s helped me so much.
“She was in a hit and run, babe, just like you.” The catch in his voice tells me how much he loved―still loves―her. “She was dead on arrival at the hospital. They could do nothing for her.” Taking his arm away from my shoulder, I see tears shimmering in his eyes, then he buries his head in his hands. “I’d give my life to have her back, for her to have survived. Whatever parts of her were missing, I wouldn’t care. She never had a chance to carry on, Sophie—unlike you. Life may have thrown a fucking big curve ball at you, but you’ve got to pick it up and run with it.” As I reach out my hand to touch his arm, he covers it with his own. “Soph, I know things look bleak right now, but do it for me, will you? Live and enjoy life. Take the chance that my Carrie never had.”
It explains so much—why he was so intent on helping me and why he was so angry when he’d found out I’d been tempted to end it all.
While I’m still trying to process what he’s told me, there’s a knock on the door. Horse goes to open it and a man walks in carrying a bag. I’ve never seen him before, but I gather why he’s here as I hear Horse greet him.
“Hey, Doc. Good to see you again.”
“Drummer sent me up. How’s the girl doing? Hear she’s shaken up after what went down.”
As Horse has lowered his voice, all I can now hear are murmurings, and I’m impatient to talk to him myself. If he’s a doctor, he’s probably treated Peg. I’m desperate to know how he is. But luckily I don’t have to wait long, and Horse brings him over. At well over six foot and dressed in biker leather, but without the cut the others wear, he’s unlike any medical person I’ve ever seen before. But despite his size, he has gentle-looking grey eyes under a shock of unruly brown hair, and his welcoming smile puts me at ease.
I ask as he’s crossing the room, “How’s Peg?”
“Honey, he’s okay. He had little more than a graze. A few stitches and he’ll be right as rain before you know it. Don’t you worry about Peg, hon. He’s a tough old bird.”
I didn’t realise how much I needed to hear that news. My head falls forward into my hands, and for some reason tears start streaming down my face. I’d been so worried that the sergeant-at-arms would die too.
“Now, let’s take a look at you, honey. How are you feeling?” Doc sits down beside me and gently takes my hand, his fingers going to my pulse. Then he puts his hand under my chin and turns me to face him, staring into my eyes. “Hmm, you’ve had a rough time tonight, haven’t you?”
Pulling myself up straight I answer, “I’m alright, it’s, it’s…”
“You’re a strong woman, Wheels, I can see that. But after what you’ve been through, I think you might need a little help getting some sleep tonight. Are you on any medication?”
“Tramadol,” I tell him. “For the pain.”
“Taken any today?”
I shake my head.
“Right, well I’ll leave you a sedative. Take it and you should get a good night’s rest. You’ve had a shock, honey. You’re probably running on fumes now, and you’ll come down hard. Take it or not, it’s up to you. But my advice is to try to get a good sleep and leave your worrying until the morning.”
It’s probably sound advice. I’m not sure how else I’d be able to close my eyes without seeing Hank laughing and joking in front of me, or the bike I’d seen lying on its side.
It’s not long after the doctor leaves us that Wraith comes in. He’s looking so serious.
Throwing a steely gaze at him I tell him, “If you’re going to tell me it’s club business, I’ll bloody kill you, Wraith.” I’m frightene
d he’s not going to let me know what’s going on. But he beckons Horse over, who pulls up a chair, and Wraith sits down beside me, the third man to sit in that exact same spot tonight.
He takes a deep breath and then moves his hand over mine, turning so he can talk to me directly. “It is club business, but there are some things you need to know,” he begins, his fingers tracing my knuckles and fingers. “It was a rival club, the Rock Demons out of Phoenix, that came after us.”
“Why? Have you had problems with them before?”
Now he touches his fingers to my lips. “Give me a chance to explain, huh?”
Okay, I’ll shut up for now.
“We already knew a contract had been put out on you, that St John-Davies wanted you found. But until tonight we didn’t know who’d taken up the challenge. Now we do.”
“The fucking Rock Demons,” Horse spits out.
“Seems that way.”
Immediately I know what I have to do. “I’ve got to go.” It’s the obvious suggestion. Either the club will chuck me out or I’ll go of my own volition.
“Fuck that! You’re going no fuckin’ where.” Wraith’s grip on my hand tightens.
“But I’ve brought trouble to the club. Hank—”
“You brought no fuckin’ trouble, babe. The Demons brought that all by themselves. Hank knew the score. We’ve made him a full member, by the way. He’ll be buried with a patch.”
It warms me to hear that, but I wished he’d been alive to become a proper member of this new family he’d been hoping to find. “But—”
Again, Wraith interrupts me. “The Demons have started something they shouldn’t have. We’re not going to let them get away with this.”
I gasp. “You can’t fight over me!”
“No, not over you, babe, though we’re not gonna let them get their fuckin’ hands anywhere near you, I swear that, but because they killed one of ours. They’re all fuckin’ dead men walking, they just don’t know it yet.”
I’ve started a war. Whatever he says, this is down to me. If they hadn’t tried to take me, the Satan’s Devils wouldn’t have been involved. I can’t let them put other people in danger because of me. “Wraith, I can’t let you do this. I’m going to go. I can’t put anyone else at risk. I’m not worth it.”
“This is happening, darlin’, whether you want it to or not, whether you stay or go. I can tell you that. Killing a brother is not something we take lightly. And…” He pauses to sweep his hand down my cheek, around my chin, across the hollow of my throat, and ending up resting over my heart. A shiver runs through me, which intensifies as he tells me in a solemn voice, “You’re going nowhere. You’re mine now, I’ve claimed you in front of the club. Your mine to protect. My ol’ lady.”
I’m lost for the right words and don’t completely understand. “That sounds permanent, Wraith?” I whisper it, my voice rises, making it a question, but I’ve been around the club long enough to know that’s exactly what it means.
“Fuckin’ right, it is. Good as a marriage in my world.” He confirms it, his lips curling into a smile as he waits for my elated response.
My eyes widen. Oh my God, what has he done? “You should have asked me first, Wraith.” My voice comes out on a whisper.
He smirks, and I realise he has no fucking idea what a mess he’s made of everything when he leans forward and asks, “Wanna be my ol’ lady, darlin’?” And without waiting for an answer, presses his lips to mine. Still shocked at this turn of events, I automatically respond, my mouth already moulding to his as though he’s trained me. His hand goes to the back of my hair and pulls me closer to him.
A coughed laugh interrupts us. “I think this is my cue to leave,” Horse tells us.
Wraith pulls away, but only very slightly. “Night, Horse.”
His mouth back on mine, I don’t even notice the door closing. Our tongues dance, but slowly. I give into his kiss, knowing it’s the last time I’ll be this close to him, knowing I’m going to have to hurt him. But I relish his touch for another few minutes, storing up memories for the lonely times to come.
My hands tighten around his. Oh God, what do I do? I want nothing more than for him to hold me, to make love to me again. Just one last time. But once more wouldn’t be enough. And that’s when I know it’s time, and that I have to tell him, have to explain and make him understand why I can’t risk it all again. Why I can’t do this.
Gently I put my hands on his chest and push him away.
Taking a deep breath, I raise my eyes to his. “Wraith, I need to tell you something.”
He’s trying to pull me back to him, and his eyebrow raises as I press back, pushing him away. Something in my expression communicates he knows he’s not going to like it. His eyes narrow. “What you want to say have any bearing on us?”
Nodding, then using the words, I confirm it. “Yes. Everything.”
“Then tell me, darlin’.” A slight hardness has come into his voice as if somehow he already suspects what I’m going to say. “But if you’re gonna say you can’t stay because of some false notion that by going you’ll stop what’s been started, you’re wrong. And there’s no safer place for you to be than with me, babe. If you go, I’ll fuckin’ go with you. I’ve told you, you’re my ol’ lady.”
Breathing in sharply once again, I get it out there. “I can’t be your old lady. I don’t want to be claimed. We’ve got to stop this now, Wraith.”
“Fuck, woman. What the fuck you talking about?”
“Us.” I point to him and then to me. “I’m finished with us, Wraith. I don’t want to do this anymore. It’s been great—”
Wraith stands, he kicks at the chair Horse had been sitting on and sends it crashing to the ground. “What the fuck are you saying? It’s been great?” He runs his fingers across his beard. “What have you done with the woman I’ve been fuckin’? Where is she? ‘Cos you obviously weren’t the one in bed with me. Great?” He stops, paces, then swings back. “What we had together was fuckin’ incredible! Once in a fuckin’ lifetime incredible!” Again he steps away, moving to the wall and putting his fist through the plasterboard. His head rolls up, then down to his chest, then again he comes over to me and his voice calms. “Am I pushing you too fast, darling? D‘you need a bit of time to think this through?”
How can I make him understand? “No, I don’t need time. I should never have let it go on this long,” I cry out, desperate for him to believe me, to go away and leave me alone to wallow in my misery. “I only wanted a one-night stand. I didn’t want it to turn into anything more.”
“A one-fuckin’-night stand?” His hands fist in his hair and his face reddens. “You only wanted one night? You wanted me to treat you like a fuckin’ sweet butt?”
I can feel tears leaking from my eyes. His rising anger is palpable, but I know he won’t hurt me. He doesn’t have to, I’m hurting myself.
“Wraith, I…”
He kicks the fallen chair again and stomps around the room. Returning to me he leans over, his hands on the bed on each side of me, trapping me. When he speaks, it’s right into my face.
“I fuckin’ claimed you, woman. In front of my brothers. I went up against my president’s instructions. I went out on a limb for you and was prepared to take the consequences. I thought there was something special between us. Never dreamed all you wanted was another notch on your fuckin’ bedpost.”
He pushes away again, his hands clenching and unclenching by his sides. “One biker going to be enough for you? Or are you going to go through the rest of my brothers now? You want to become a club whore?”
His words are like arrows of pain shooting through me. I hurt, even though he’s not physically touched me. But how can I truthfully say it’s nothing like that? While I’m not going to be chasing after his brothers, one night was all I ever should have had with him. See what happens when you break your own rules.
“Wraith, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Hurt me? You think I’m
fuckin’ hurt?” He spits the words at me. “Well, you were a good fuckin’ lay, bitch. Glad I found out what you really are before we got in any deeper.”
He turns and leaves, slamming the door hard behind him.
Chapter Twenty-One
Wraith…
Stomping my way back down to the clubhouse, I’m unable to understand what the fuck had just happened. For the first time in my life, I put my neck on the line for a woman, and this is how she fucking rewards me? Told me she just wanted a bit of fun and nothing serious. What the fuck? Wasn’t that my line?
I kick out at everything movable in my way, and even some things that aren’t―at least my steel-toed motorcycle boots are protecting my feet. Tension radiates through me and I’m lucky I don’t meet a brother on the way, as just one word might mean he’d get my fist in his face. I can’t go inside like this. It’s late, or early, whichever way you prefer to look at it, but there still could be someone around, and right now I’m not in the mood for company. I circle the clubhouse, making my way to the picnic tables out back and sit on one. My fingers probe in my back pocket for the pack of smokes I used to keep there before I remember I’d given up two years ago. Fuck, I could kill for a cancer stick right now.
My head falls into my hands. How could I have read her so wrong? Thinking back, the signs were there, how she reacted any time I hinted this could be something more than just a few fucks between us. I’d assumed she’d been on the same page. How could I have been so mistaken?
Slowly my rage starts to fade, replaced by some other emotion that I’m reluctant to name. At first, I was attracted to her, but then different feelings began to grow, and I’d been certain they were reciprocated. Had I been wrong all along? Those little touches, those loving looks. Had she really just been using me for my body? Fuck, what a turnaround this is. Is this my punishment for the way I’d always pushed the club whores out of my bed after sex? What fucking payback to find she’s acting like a female me.
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