“I suppose you’ve got all the ideas.” Kashton raises an eyebrow.
“I do.” I stare at him with some defiance, chest pushed out. “Ebony loves the closeness. She just enjoys being with someone. Hugs, gentle touches. This is the way in with her. She’s never been allowed much intimacy. The trick is not to move too fast.”
“Easier said than done.” Lucien mutters, “Aren’t you the one that just told us to hurry up the operation?”
“Hurrying up by getting one of us closer to her.” Sometimes it feels like I’m dealing with a bunch of monkeys. “Because the others will resist her. They already have that casual intimacy thing going on. They have gotten close then retreated. She’s fascinated by this. It’s what one of us needs to do,”
“Still. Count you out.” Leo’s smile is a little cruel. “If it hasn't happened in all the time you’ve been near her, I think it’s clear your shot is done.”
This makes me mad as a wasp trapped in a glass, but he is right, so I just sneer at him without bothering to make a comment. Screaming at him won’t help.
“Look, we need to separate her from Seth and Lucien somehow. One of us needs to start building that casual intimacy, getting her comfortable, making her curious. All of that will be much more effective if we get the others away from her.” I’m trying as hard as I can to impress the importance of this, but I can see by their smiles no one’s taking me seriously.
“I think you may have tried that,” Leo laughs. “It had a reverse effect?”
“Yeah, man.” Kashton backs him up. “Trying to keep her away from those two got us nowhere. She just went after them more. I can’t believe you are sitting here going over the same old shit. Like seriously.”
He’s amused at my ideas, but I can tell he’s getting exasperated as well.
“Look.” I can’t stop my voice coming out as a growl. “I’ve been doing my best to convince her about Seth. The least you could do is work on Lucien. If you can’t make him look bad, you can still plant seeds of doubt in her. I know her better than you. Even if she doesn’t believe you, she’s going to think about it. She’s not the woman she was before, full of confidence and fire. Lucien and Seth keep pulling away from her. She can’t be sure of their love because they don’t act. Don’t overdo it. Just mention small things about how they play with women they don’t actually like.”
Leo nods. “I see sense in that. But it still feels like taking the long way around.”
“Well, if that’s how you feel,” I snap back at him, “You should just launch yourself on her.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re the one that’s trying to arrange all this, so you get the kiss,” Leo says.
I roll my eyes, trying to hide the fact that he’s right.
“Yeah.” Kashton grins. “We all know you’re hoping to tell her some bad story about Seth then have her just throw her arms around your neck and be oh-so grateful.”
“Seriously.” It slips out through gritted teeth. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I can’t believe they are teasing me like this. I’ve been close to Ebony; I’ve gotten to know her in the new body. They think she is the same person Snow was before, and that's how they apply their logic. I know this is dangerous to the entire plan.
They should be listening to me, not making jokes about me.
I draw myself up, crossing my arms even tighter. They need to give me a bit more respect. Am I sitting here, cracking jokes at their expense? No. Because I’ve got class. I’m sick of never getting enough—whether its respect or Ebony’s attention.
They don’t take me seriously. It raises my rage and frustration to where I want to beat their faces in.
And the main reason is that Ebony doesn’t respect me, either. Always treating me as a brother, not a powerful man. It burns me every time she just looks me over and sees nothing, feels nothing except an annoying brother.
That’s exactly how these dicks are making me feel. An awkward brother who always embarrasses the rest of the family.
Leo is giving me a strange look like he knows what I’m thinking. I give him a scowl.
My real problem is that Ebony’s had Seth and me by her side all this time and she clearly prefers Seth. I think it wouldn’t make me so angry if she was looking at all of us with different levels of interest, but being compared side by side with someone she clearly likes more… Living that situation… yeah. It feels personal.
She’s focused on Seth now. She’s always preferred him, but now it’s changed. I’m not only invisible, but she is also actually turning away from me to favor him.
“What are your plans then? If you think my ideas are so shit?”
Kashton turns to me with one of those cheeky grins women love to hate.
“I’m not going to try and separate her from the others, and I’m not going to take your advice of slow intimacy.” Kashton's confidence seems to be smoldering out of him and kindling into sex appeal. “I’m going to make her want me. She’s hurting for an ally, a friend. She’s going to be very open to someone who helps her. Especially if it's unconditional.”
Kashton’s grin widens, turning nasty. “I know greed, after all. I can make Ebony crave. I can push her over the edge—because I can make her want it more.”
13
Ebony
I don’t like to use the gardening gloves, our Magical Flora instructor, Professor Hyacinth, provides for us. Growing, tending, and harvesting herbs and flowers aren’t my strong suit. I’m nowhere near as talented as Ivora is. However, I take comfort in feeling the earth in my hands. Every vine and root has a pulse. When I touch the dirt of the greenhouse, I feel all of those pulses at once.
“Be careful with those plants there,” Ivora advises me. “They’re Stingtail Nettles. The name tells you everything you need to know. Aggressive little things. Very territorial. Their stingers hurt for days after they’re extracted.”
“Why does the school grow these if they’re so violent?”
“When the roots are boiled and grated, they make a powerful aphrodisiac.”
“A violent root is used for romance?” I fail to hold back my laughter.
“Who said anything about romance? The plant’s for sex,” Ivora giggles. “Every woman thinks they want the slow, tender, gentle romantic guy in her bed. I’ll admit it’s great at the right moment. But most women want passion and heat. Slam-me-up-against-the-wall kind of sex.”
My face is heating up so fast that my forehead breaks out in a sweat. Faces flash in my mind's eye. Lucien. Seth. Kashton. I physically shake my head to stop my thoughts.
“Are you all right?” Ivora asks.
“Yeah, why?”
“Because you look like you’re having a fit,” she laughs. “It’s okay if we talk. Professor Hyacinth is out in the main garden tending to her Singing Lullabulbs.”
“I like talking to you.” My voice stutters as I struggle to form the words.
“I know. We’re friends. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yup.”
“Oh,” Ivora draws out the syllables. Her eyes grow wide then a wicked smile crosses her pixie features. Her wings flutter excitedly. “You only got uncomfortable when I started talking about sex!”
“That’s not true,” I say quickly. My hand brushes dangerously close to a Stingtail Nettle root. It’s wicked little tendril snaps at my hand, and I pull back just in time.
“Liar,” Ivora cackles. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were a virgin.”
“I am.”
“No way!” Ivora flutters over to me, her slippered feet lightly dragging across the soil. “You’re too pretty to be a virgin. You have the beauty of a vampire waif without actually wanting to suck the blood of the living.”
“I am not.” I can’t meet her gaze. I’m far too embarrassed.
“I seriously don’t believe you,” Ivora places her small hands on her hips. “You attract men like honey attracts flies.”
“Th
at’s a disgusting comparison,” I say. “And I don’t attract men.” The truth is that I’ve been avoiding the men at the school. Gabriel’s been horrible to be around lately. Lucien, as gorgeous as he is, is an annoyance more than anything else. I haven’t spoken to Kashton since I was sent to headmaster Leo’s office. Seth keeps trying to talk to me, but I’ve figured out ways to avoid him. Of course, I never want anything to do with Dorian.
As terrible as my conversation with headmaster Leo was, he was right about one thing. I need to control my magic for my safety as well as everyone else’s. That means I can’t allow myself to be distracted by silly things. It’s easier to keep myself under control if my contact with them is minimal. I don’t understand why that’s the case, but it is. I’m not going to question it. I’m just going to move forward, learn more about my magic, and avoid expulsion.
“Why are you being so dodgy?” Ivora pouts. “We’re women. We’re friends. This is what we talk about!”
“We talk about gardens, potions, and homework and I enjoy those talks very much.”
“I detected a fertility spell on you when we first met,” Ivora reminds me.
“But I told you I didn’t perform one,” I counter. “That’s the truth.”
“I know, but that’s not the only weird thing I’ve noticed,” she shrugs. When she doesn’t continue, I suck in a deep breath.
“What other weird things have you noticed?” I ask because she clearly wants me to ask.
“Well, for one thing, you obviously love Seth, but you’ve been shutting him out lately.”
“Excuse me?”
“Don’t do the doe-eyed blinky thing you do when you’re caught off guard,” Ivora chides.
“I am caught off guard!”
“Maybe you weren’t expecting me to ask about it, but you definitely love Seth. I’m a fairy. We know these things.”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” I mutter and continue clawing at the dirt. A Stingtail Nettle grazes my hand when I’m too slow to pull away. I hiss in pain and clutch my hand to my chest. Tears well up before I can stop them.
“Oh gosh, are you okay?” Ivora kneels by my side. “I told you to be careful!”
Ivora wrestles my hand closer to her so she can inspect it. She turns my hand over, trying to find the gash.
“Wait, it barely got you. Does it really hurt that bad? It didn’t even break the skin. Maybe you’re allergic.”
“It’s not that,” I sniffle and pull my hand back. Tears are streaming down my cheeks, and I can do nothing to stop them.
“What is it, Ebony. Talk to me! I’m your friend, you can tell me anything.” Ivora wraps a willowy arm around my shoulder.
“I don’t know how I feel about Seth,” I cry.
“What? You guys grew up together. Aren’t you close? Did you have a fight?”
“What?” I furrow my brow in confusion.
“It’s just that you two seemed closer than you are with Gabriel. I figured he was your favorite brother or something like that.”
“Brother,” I repeat slowly.
Now Ivora looks confused. “He’s your foster brother, right?”
“Yes. I thought you meant something else when you asked me why I’ve been shutting Seth out,” I explain.
“Like what?” Ivora asks.
“Gabriel, Seth, and I share a foster mother, but we weren’t raised as siblings. I was kept separate from them most of the time. I’ve always wanted to get to know them better, but Cordelia never allowed it.”
“So, you don’t see them as brothers?”
“They aren’t my brothers,” I say. “So when you asked about why I’ve been avoiding Seth when I obviously love him, I-” I can’t make myself say it. My throat chokes up as more tears threaten to spill over.
“You thought I meant in love,” Ivora finishes. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to stress you out. I always do that. I get so pushy and invasive.”
“It’s okay.” I place my hand over hers and give it a squeeze.
“But do you love him like that?” Ivora asks.
I can’t help but laugh at the irony. “I’m not sure. Seth’s always been so kind to me. As a child, I always wanted to get to know him and Gabriel better.”
“But you clearly feel something for him that you don’t feel for Gabriel,” Ivora prompts. “That has to mean something.”
“Gabriel hasn’t been a good friend or brother to me lately.” I wipe my eyes with the back of my hand to avoid smearing soil on my face. “He thinks something’s happening between Seth and me. He’s making it seem like I’m doing something dirty and wrong with my brother when I’m not doing anything, and he isn’t my brother. It’s not fair!”
“Men are stupid. They do things like that all the time.” Ivora rubs my back. “I’m sure it’ll blow over in no time, and everything will go back to normal.”
“That’s what I like to call wishful thinking.” A male voice makes me jump. Lucien steps around a thick, leafy bush.
“Were you eavesdropping?” I shriek. “What’s wrong with you!”
“I wasn’t eavesdropping on purpose. I’m in this class. I’d figure you’d remember that since you were aggressively trying not to look at me since class started.”
“No, I haven’t,” I mutter even though I had.
“We’ll circle back to that,” Lucien smirks. “I just wanted to say that Gabriel’s only being an arse about whatever you may or may not be doing with Seth is because he sees a healthy relationship and is extremely jealous.”
“Yeah, right,” I roll my eyes. Lucien glares at me.
“I’m one of the stupid men you like to whine about so take my word for it on this one. Besides, if you’re dimwitted enough to pay Gabriel any mind, then I don’t know what I’m doing here in the first place.”
“How dare you?” Ivora snaps. “Is it your goal in life just to make people miserable? You have a real knack for it.”
“I’m honest. Which is more than I can say for half the people here.” Lucien says.
“Just stop it!” I beg before Ivora can fire back. “I’m sick of this. I just want to master my magic and be a good student. Why won’t people just let me do that? I’m trying so hard to be good. Do you have any idea what it’s like to have a dark power lurking within you and not have anyone to turn to?”
I hug my knees to my chest and let myself cry freely. Ivora rubs my back in silence. I don’t notice Lucien approaching until he’s crouched on the ground beside me.
“I know you don’t like me very much,” Lucien said. His voice is surprisingly tender. “But I meant it when I said I’m honest. If you should ever find yourself in need of a friend, ally, or even just a listening ear, you can come to me. I mean that.”
I lift my gaze to his face. The smirking, dashing man has been replaced by someone who looks earnest and sensitive. He gently takes my hand in both of his. Ivora slowly backs away but doesn’t leave.
“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” I say.
“You’re upset. It’s okay to be upset,” Lucien replies. “Besides, usually, I deserve it when you snap at me.”
“That’s true,” I laugh despite everything. Lucien brings his hand to my cheek and wipes away a tear.
“You’ve got mud on your face,” he laughs.
I close my eyes as if that will stop the embarrassment.
“I tried really hard to keep my face clean.”
“You still look lovely.”
I look up at Lucien once more. I feel desire stir within me. It drowns out all my other emotions. My gaze flickers to his lips.
“That’s all for today, class!” Professor Hyacinth’s voice rings through the greenhouse. Students pour out of the greenhouse doors. Our privacy is ruined. Lucien offers a smile before extracting his hands and disappearing into the crowd.
14
Ebony
During a break after class, I retreat to my room to clean up. I don’t want to risk getting gardening soil on my papers or sm
earing mud on the floors. I don’t want anyone to have a reason to be angry with me for the rest of today. My self-esteem can’t take it.
I still find it hard looking into my mirror. When I close my eyes, I have nightmares: there’s a pair of glowing green eyes, and that malicious voice… Then I shudder and turn away. Washing my hands and face feels good, so I let the cool water run down my neck. The place where I brushed against the nettle is still angry, but Ivora was right that it didn’t pierce the skin.
Taking off my dirty, sweaty clothes is such a relief. To the point where I entertain the thought of walking around my room naked, with the windows open, letting the breeze tickle my bare skin. A knock at the door startles me. “Wait just a minute! Don’t open the door!” Frantically I pull on some fresh clothes, wondering who it could be. Surely not the boys? They’re not allowed in the girl's dormitory.
After making sure I’m decent, I open the door to see Ivora standing impatiently. She’s obviously not happy at having to wait for permission to enter.
“About time!” Ivory moans as she pushes past me. Her feet carry her in a gliding motion across the floor. I can sense excitement hiding behind her irritation – it makes me wish that I could see her aura. What colors would be surrounding her?
“How are you feeling? Is your hand ok?” Ivora grabs me and studies the back of my hand. Instantly, she notices its redness. “Discolored, but there’s no swelling. You’ll be fine. Well, physically, anyway. What about emotionally?” Ivora adds. Her tone is so sweet, so sincere.
I remember when we first met, how she said people described her as too direct. There’s definitely some truth to those claims. Ivora may be impolitely straightforward, but she means well. And honestly, she may be the only person I can trust with my true feelings.
“I’ll be ok. Everything is just so confusing - I’m trying so hard to be good and understand my powers. I don’t know why I can’t seem to restrain myself; every time I try to do something positive, it all goes wrong.”
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