by Jamie Knight
I have no money to go to college and I’ve never been great at academics anyway. I’ve started applying to work at other local bakeries or restaurants. So far, I haven’t heard back from any, but hopefully I will soon. I tell myself to stay positive, but it’s difficult.
A quiet knock at the door startles me from my thoughts. Maxim is asleep, so I quietly tiptoe over and open the door. It’s Aunt Barbara.
She whispers to me, "I'm done with the bath and thought that maybe you should take one too because you’ve been working hard all day. I also want to apologize for seeming frustrated earlier.”
"Oh, it’s no problem. I really do understand completely. A bath sounds wonderful, thanks," I reply.
We both smile at each other. Barbara takes Maxim and goes to put him in his crib. I watch how carefully she cradles him, then look around the room for my shower stuff and pajamas.
At least I’ll always have my Aunt Barbara, I think, feeling very grateful. And Maxim, of course. Nothing else in my life might be going right, but as long as the two most important people are in it, I know things will turn out okay.
Chapter 3 - Jocelyn
I sink into the warm bubbly water of the bath. I so needed this after today. Life certainly is stressful at times.
I lay my head back and close my eyes. I'm doing my best to relax but all I can hear is my mother's voice telling me, “you will ruin your life if you have this baby.”
Growing up, I had to listen to her incessantly complain about how babies take up all your time and energy. Me being pregnant only made her complain about it even worse.
I think about how I was so angry at her for continuously suggesting that I should give Maxim up for adoption, once she found out I was pregnant. I’m still angry at her for suggesting that.
I smile as I remember the way Maxim reached for me when I got home. Like I was his whole world. Even though life sure is hard sometimes, I'm so glad that I kept him. I think about how I first got pregnant and another conversation comes to mind.
I remember my mom scolding me for having pre-marital sex and I have to scoff every time I think about it. I think how ironic it was that I got pregnant on my first time having sex. And the sad part is that it wasn’t even good sex, at all.
The memory makes me shudder and feel all icky. I'm so glad I'm in the bathtub right now. I sigh and shake my head. I can’t believe I ever hooked up with that guy. I mean, I'm happy that I have Maxim, but that guy was a total loser.
And to think I lost my virginity to him. I was so humiliated when he wanted nothing to do with me after that. That's the reason why I didn’t even bother to tell him I was pregnant, and because I knew he’d be a dick about it.
I was so right about that. Eventually, word got around to him because my parents told his parents after they found out. This led to a whole mess, because predictably, he denied having sex with me. Because of that, his parents demanded a paternity test. They are dicks just like him.
Seeing how they reacted, it's only natural that I didn’t want him or them in the baby’s life so I didn’t tell anyone where I had moved to and hope to never see any one of them ever again.
I sigh and lean back in the water. This is too depressing. I switch gears and start to wonder what life could have been like. If I could have lost my virginity to anyone, it would have been someone totally different. No little high school boys for me.
My hand slips under the water as I fantasize about the kind of guy I wish I could have lost my virginity to. I have always been attracted to older men. I would want him to be handsome, and very experienced. It’s important that he be able to take good care of emotionally and physically.
The soapy water helps my fingers slide in and out of my pussy. I play with myself as I imagine my dream hunk there in the bathroom with me. I rub my clit as I imagine him taking off his clothes to get into the water with me.
He looks at me like he has been waiting for me all day. I stroke my fingers faster as I imagine him pulling me onto his lap.
I'm almost there. I pretend that he’s sliding into me. My fingers are his cock now, as they move back inside my pussy hole. He would feel so good, thrusting in and out of me while we’re in the water. He would hold me tight, like he’s never going to let go.
I cum in the bathwater as I imagine us crying out each other’s names. I wonder what it would feel like to have him kiss me all over. To know what love, or even a gentle caress, feels like. It certainly wasn't anything like I imagined back in high school.
I lay back in the tub again. This time I'm dizzy and a little more calm now that I had my daydream time. I feel much more at peace with everything that has happened. I take a deep breath and reach for the shampoo when I hear my son crying.
I know that my relaxing time is over and that it is time to return to real life. I splash the soapy water all over me, then hurry to get out. I know that Aunt Barbara will check him first, so I have a few minutes to dress before he needs me.
Maxim is my priority, after all. I take a deep breath and then feel an overwhelming sadness. All the calm and peace I felt a little while ago seem to have disappeared.
I don't know what's wrong with me these days. I don't feel like anyone or anything is a burden to me in any way; in fact, it’s more that I worry that I’m a burden on other people. My poor Aunt Barbara – having to help raise another baby all over again, even though she says she likes to do it. And my Uncle Bob – he’s been an asshole lately, but he was nice to lend me the money, and I did think I’d have more to repay him with by now.
But it’s not even any of that that’s really weighing on me, although I can’t put a finger on what is. I guess I just wish that was more to life. Lately it seems like it has become so difficult to get through. I wish there was some way for things to seem easier.
I scoff at that thought, telling myself to grow the fuck up – that life isn’t all fun and games, especially not after one has kids, as my mom never hesitated to remind me. I hurriedly pull on my pajamas and go racing out of the bathroom as I hear my son cry again.
I pick him up and cradle him to me. I make soft shushing sounds as I walk with him back to our room. As I head back down the hall, Barbara stands in her doorway and gives me a little smile.
This lifts my spirits because I feel like she’s proud of me. Even though I'm struggling, she thinks I'm doing my best.
Maxim cries a little longer, so I feed him, and check his diaper. Afterwards, I hum a little lullaby and he falls asleep on my chest. We have a rocking chair in the room, so I sit there with him for a while.
He’s so tiny; I love to hold him. I think about how much having him changed my life, in a good way I suppose, but also in an unexpected way. I wasn't prepared for any of this. But I’m still glad I have him, even though my mom would never believe it.
Chapter 4 - Derek
“Mr. North, your eyes are so handsome when you’re squinting at the computer scene like that,” Karen says, causing me to quickly say, “Karen, that’s not appropriate behavior in the workplace.”
“Why don’t we take it to my house, then?” she quickly quips.
I sigh and rub my temples.
Not this again.
Currently I’m overseeing a team of software engineers designing the latest app for the company, and it is no easy task. Our company is based in Silicon Valley, but I had to relocate to Pittsburgh to supervise the project. It’s for a steel company and is designed to let them know how much product they have on hand.
I was brought in because the steel company wanted someone to come work in their offices. Honestly, I don’t think they realized when they started this job that it takes a whole team of web developers to do it, but we all traipsed here from California anyway. I mean, they are paying us, and it’s work, so we might as well do it.
Thank goodness I have experts here to back me up. Though I'm great on my own, I don't know if I could handle it all alone. It's a lot of mental and emotional wor
k, likely too much for any one person to manage without help.
Thankfully, we were able to bring a whole crew out here with us. They are all the best and most qualified in their fields. There is, however, one member of our team that irks me specifically, and that is Karen. She’s the only female on our team but I swear that’s not the reason she irritates me – I’m not sexist.
The real reason she irritates me so much is that she is constantly flirting with me like this, and trying to get my attention. It’s frustrating because I'm not interested in her and also because she keeps interrupting my work, especially when I’m trying to give orders to the team. I'm glad no one else has caught on yet, but I can’t let this keep happening.
It’s so annoying. I mean it’s not like I don’t want to have sex – I do, and what red blooded straight male wouldn’t? It’s been a long couple of weeks, especially with all this stress at work.
If it were some other woman, I might be all over her, because I'm normally a player – but not with Karen. Not only because she’s my subordinate and that would be improper and get us both into major trouble at work, but also because she’s not my type.
She’s very skinny and I like curvy women. Plus, I also like intelligent, classy women and she acts like a bimbo even though she’s a smart woman in the tech field. I don’t know why she insists on debasing herself like that, but she does. Each day her flirting gets more obvious and desperate despite my rebuking her advances.
I need to put a stop to this before anyone else notices. I have no choice but to tell her to meet me in my office for a private meeting. I know this will send her the wrong message, but I have no other choice.
Just as I predicted, when we get into the office, she gets all excited because she thinks I want to have sex with her. She is practically tearing her clothes off. I have to grab her hands and physically stop her in addition to verbally telling her to stop.
Once I have her attention, I start to explain that I actually called her in to say she has to stop flirting with me. She stares at me in disbelief. I don’t care about her emotions or feelings right now.
She means nothing to me; she’s just another employee that is misbehaving. I keep explaining to her the reason for this meeting.
"If you don’t knock this off, I'll have to have you move teams. It is not going to happen between us and I don’t want other people to think it is, or else I'll get into big trouble with HR, and I can’t deal with that right now," I tell her.
She breaks free from my grasp and runs her hands over my body. She pleads with me and tries to convince me that it’ll be our little secret.
"I can be a good girl and make you very happy," she whispers.
She’s trying to entice me, but it’s having the opposite effect. I'm not attracted to aggressive, sex-hungry women. They are too easy to find and have. Then once you have them, they are so boring. I like a woman with some mystery, who puts up a challenge.
I scoff and remove her hands from my body.
"I have already made myself perfectly clear on this matter, and I am not going to repeat myself again. I am your boss and my orders are to be obeyed," I snap.
I don’t care if I hurt her feelings. I'm trying to get work done and I can’t because this woman is all over me every second. It's very unprofessional and I can’t stand it anymore. I run my business the way I want, and I expect all my employees to obey my rules and orders, for professional reasons.
Her eyes look hurt, and her hands fall limply at her sides. I'm not taking any pity on her right now, though. I have more important things to worry about.
I clear my throat and straighten my suit.
"I need to get back to work. Now I expect you to fix up your clothes and rejoin your team, of which you are an important part, so long as you can maintain your professional behavior," I tell her, as sternly as possible.
She says nothing and continues to stand there.
As I turn to walk out of the office, she whispers softly, "But I want you."
I just sigh and roll my eyes, then walk back out to join the others.
We are a small team that is attempting to handle the workload of a large company. This is going to mean very long and stressful workdays. I can’t afford to have anyone bothering me or distracting me right now. Something like that is just too great of a risk.
I've worked too hard in life to get where I am and I'm not going to risk it all on some bimbo’s lust- fueled fantasies. I will never tolerate any of my employees acting this way. It could tarnish not only my reputation, but that of the company as well. We could lose clients because of that.
I can only hope my message got through to her, even though, based on past experience with her and knowing how insistent she is on throwing herself at me, it probably didn’t.
Chapter 5 - Derek
After my long, frustrating day at work is finally over, I decide to head back to the luxurious penthouse apartment I’m renting while I’m working on this project in Pittsburgh. After a quick elevator ride, I stagger through the door.
I feel impatient and frustrated today. I know I have a lot more work to finish still – my work never seems as if it’s done – but I just can’t focus. I'm so damned annoyed with Karen. I tell myself just need a few minutes alone at home to relax and put the situation out of my mind. I have to be at my best because we are in the early stages of this company, so everything has to go perfect.
I sigh as I lie on my soft couch. Of course, I should be used to this stuff by now. This Karen drama. Women are always throwing themselves at me, assuming that they are my type, or that I will be instantly attracted to them.
What many of them don’t know is that that's never going to happen; I'm extremely picky, and all the women who keep throwing themselves at me are all the same. That makes them indistinguishable in my eyes, and I need a woman who stands out from the crowd and gives me a challenge.
Plus, these women usually start to catch feelings, whenever they meet someone like me. I'm not looking for a relationship, commitment, or anything like that right now. I never am. Being a player is what I’m known for.
This whole situation with Karen gets me wondering what exactly my type of perfect woman really is. I close my eyes as I lay on the couch. I start to think about the type of girl who is my type. I want her to be curvy and feisty and independent and smart.
I smile at the ceiling, realizing that that is definitely the type of woman I’m attracted to. I wish I could meet one out here in Pittsburgh, but I seriously doubt that is going to happen. Back in San Francisco, definitely, but not here. The West Coast girls have a certain laid-back allure to them that I haven’t seen in these hardened East Coast girls.
I slide my hand in my pants and wrap it around my big, hard cock. I stroke it while thinking about what I'd like to do to such a girl. I would love to have her in my bed. To feel her naked body trembling beneath me as I take her virginity. Then to take turns, me eating her out and her going down on me.
Then I would hold her down on the bed, show her a little bit of who is in charge. I would never be rough with her, of course. I would have to start off slow, easing into her and romancing her with a little tender love making. Somehow, that idea seems very appealing right now. Maybe because it’s been awhile since I was with anyone.
I play with myself until I cum, but somehow my little fantasy session feels as if it falls short, not being as enjoyable as it usually is. I wish Karen hadn’t ruined this for me just like she had ruined my work day.
Also, I'm tired of always having to fucking fantasize about the perfect woman. I want a real one, just for me.
After I clean up, I lay back on the couch and stare at the ceiling some more. My thoughts drift to how my life used to be back home.
I really miss the auctions back in San Francisco. There are certain exclusive, secret clubs that billionaires like me go to when we want to find certain women or let out certain kinks.
If I were there, I w
ould be able to buy a woman and spend the night with a woman without having to worry about getting into trouble at work or dealing with a relationship, etc. Things were so easy and carefree back in San Fran. I wish I could leave Pittsburgh and get back to that. But of course, I still have work to do here.
After a few minutes, an idea occurs to me. I jump off the couch and look for my phone. Once I find it, I quickly call my friend Brian. We both used to go to the auctions together, and he liked them even more than I did – if that was possible.
“Hey, bud,” he says, once he answered. “How’s Philly treating ya?”
“It’s Pittsburgh,” I correct him.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pittsburgh. All I know is that it’s a big city that starts with P, in the state that starts with P, and it has to be better than this hellhole.”
I laugh, realizing that he’s right – it could be must worse. Brian is stuck in a small town in Idaho while he helps the company’s co-founder, Andrew, start a branch there. The state had good tax benefits for tech companies that they couldn’t pass up – but Brian was missing California even more than I was.
We go through the usual formalities of greeting and checking on each other, but I’m anxious to cut all of that short because I don't have time for suck things at the moment. I'm impatient and need a sympathetic ear so I can vent my problems.
I’ll go ahead and admit right now that I can be a selfish asshole sometimes. But can’t we all?
"So, what's up, old pal?” Brian asks.
I need no further prompt and quickly start to complain about the situation to him.
After listening to me, this impromptu phone call works out just like I had hoped it might. Although I was surprised to hear about what it's like where Brian is.
Brian tells me that he’s still in Bloom, managing the branch expansion office there, and that they aren’t flush with auctions either, but that he’s managed to get some started up. It was disappointing at first, but business soon grew, and now they were in the process of having several.
