I still couldn’t figure out how to make this right. I started carrying around the rest of the money with every intention of handing it back to this terrifying man. The next time he clutched at my arm, I said, “Hey, I’ve got something for you,” and dug the crumpled bag out of my purse.
Norris took one look inside the bag and gave me a dark chuckle. “What’s this? This doesn't even cover the interest on the ten grand, little girl,” he sneered with a nasty low growl. Interest? Oh my gawd! I was in real trouble. He refused to take it as a good faith payback. He had something else planned.
“You’re going to work at TABOO, slut.” And then he stormed away. I had no clue what TABOO was. I went home and started researching on the internet, but no such club existed. I read an article that the authorities were trying to shut down a gambling house known for its illegal activity. It was going down right under their noses. It was wrapped in legal stuff that made the Cribs a boat load of money. I guess they washed their money there, whatever that meant.
Next time I saw Norris, he grabbed me and dragged me to his car. “Shut up, bitch. Just shut up!” he yelled brutally as he got in the car and headed down the block. Pretty soon, he was hauling me out of the car by my hair and shoving me into a doorway. No sign, no lights, just a darkened doorway that would ruin me. I grew to adulthood that very same day. I was sixteen years old.
“Welcome to TABOO. Here's your outfit. You’ll be working here three nights a week, cunt.” Norris pushed an outfit into my hand—a short skirt and top that gave me barely any covering. It left nothing to the imagination. “Get to work, bitch.” I knew I was indebted to him—or was it the Cribs? Anyway, there was no way I could decline. I was wedged in tight, but now, after all these years, I want to find a way out. Surely I’ve worked there long enough to pay back my debt threefold?
“Have fun, cunt!” Norris shouts and shoves me towards the bar. I started as a ‘busboy.’ Now, years later, I deal on the poker table and keep wondering when my indentured servitude will be up. I’ve been working here for years. And at twenty-five, it’s time to find a way out.
Every time I go to work, I worry this is it for me, that this is my last day on Earth. I know some day Norris is going to hold me to his threats. He wants to rape or kill me. I tremble inside every single time he gets near me. His voice weasels its way inside and flips me the fuck out. His cruel words always make me worried if I even have a future. Will I survive today?
Norris is as vicious as they come. One day while I was working, I heard a loud “BANG!” I went running to discover one of the waiters, Dave, falling down to the floor. He was lying in a pool of blood. I could see the gunshot wound in the middle of his forehead. He died right before my eyes. I got a quick lesson in staying invisible that day. I was terrified. I knew I would never be safe and this Norris dude could change on a dime.
He’s the boss at TABOO, potentially the owner. Sometimes I wonder if the Cribs even know it exists…or were they backers in this slimy scheme? He repulses me to the bone. I hate him. I despise him with every fiber of my being.
I’m not a gangbanger. I’m still just a young girl forced to work one of their money laundering joints. I never mingle with any of the people at this place. I don’t want to get involved in any way. I want out! But the asshole Norris won’t let me the fuck go.
“Bitch, just do your fucking job!” he taunts as he pushes me toward the bar with venom pouring from every word. He will never let me go. He loves to torment me too much. He gets joy out of my fear. “Someday, little girl. Someday.”
Jack is about to come over.
Sex with Jack is the best remedy to a shit day.
He’s my medicine. I'll take him all night long.
Please.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Jack
Alex and I fuck our brains out. I have no time to dwell on my crappy day. Thankfully she never asks about my life. We don't share much about our lives like a normal couple. We aren’t a couple at all, damn it. I can get lost in the feel of her cunt. My cock loves to get buried in her warm pussy. Her skin’s deliciously sweet and smooth. Sex with her is mesmerizing, and I get lost inside her every single time I fuck her.
I love hanging around her. Sometimes I daydream about Alex, I wonder about her life. I’d love to know more about her. I want to ask lots of things and hope I have the balls to ask someday. But I’m just afraid she’ll run away from me, and I don’t want that to happen. It doesn't stop me from wishing for more sometimes.
I stop and think, Whoa, what the fuck? Do I really want more? Am I starting to have feelings for this girl? Holy hell, this started out so easy. She’s carefree, and I love her free spirit. I think I’ve been fooling myself all along, falling for her more each time I see her.
When I’m with Alex, I believe I can be a better man. She inspires me, and I believe I can do better. I run away like a little bitch in the morning after I watch her sleep. She looks so beautiful and innocent as she sighs into her pillow.
But the ‘more’ I dream of? Yeah, that haunts me.
I have things to do, places to go, and I fucking don’t want to be run over by emotions. I want to focus on this new life. But every now and then throughout my long day, I dream of what it means to want ‘more’ with Alex.
After that shit show with Ted, I go back to my office on the 17th floor. I look out my window and sigh. I hope I can do a better job than that asshole. As I turn around, Derek comes into my office.
“Hey Jack, how are you doing this fine day?” he chuckles and holds out his hand. We shake and then sit down, looking over at each other, eyebrows raised. “I wanted to personally welcome you. I’m not here a lot, but I wanted to make sure you had everything you need.” He gives me a warm smile, and it dawns on me why the ladies go crazy for this ball player. His smile reaches into me and yanks at my heart strings. He really cares about these kids; donating huge amounts of his contract is only the beginning for him. I can tell his heart is in it.
“I don’t know if anyone told you, but we have a food bank. We serve hot meals every night down by Market Street. We hope to help these kids in several ways. Let me know if you can donate any time to serve meals.” Derek knows what he’s doing. He knows there’s no way I’m not going to offer to help.
“Nope, no one told me about your food program. I’d love to volunteer a night a week.” I hope I’m not overcommitting, but isn’t this why I left that cushy job and those cushy benefits? It’s time for me to embrace the entire job, the way they work, reaching kids with baseball and food. They even have a tutoring program.
“Dude, that's awesome, I’ll send Liam your way. He runs things down there. You can make sure your kids know where to grab a free dinner. Now, let’s see what caseload they gave you.” He digs around on my desk and finds the file he was searching for. “These kids are anywhere from twelve to seventeen years old. We have special counselors for the little ones. How did the first day of coaching go?” He looks at me, concern etching across his face.
“Those kids! Some of them are really talented. It was awesome to play with them. We worked on hitting over the weekend. I showed them some tricks.” I laugh at that. I’m going to show those kids everything I know about the game, and maybe they’ll have some fun. I think they could all use a dose of fun.
“I think Charles is good enough for Triple-A ball. What do you think?” I think Derek can get him seen by a scout. I want to know if he’s down.
“Charles is amazing. He has a strong arm. Dude can really hit, too. Yeah, I think we need to get a scout or three out here to see him play. I’ll make a note to myself.” Derek clicks away on his phone, sending himself a memo. “I worry about him. I heard the Cribs tried to recruit him recently. I could beat the shit out of anyone trying to grab one of our kids.” Derek’s jaw tightens. He grinds his teeth, and I feel his rage. His anger vibrates right off his skin.
“You know I’ll keep an eye out for anything like that. I’m not letting anyone steal one of
our kids for their own benefit.” Derek and I share a knowing look. We both commit to this.
“Okay, let’s look at this file together. I know some of these kids—met them at the dining hall.” Derek and I get down to business. He talks about the challenges each kid faces. It turns out he knows all my kids, and his insight is invaluable even though the information is hard to hear.
Charles, my great hitter, is on the list. Derek knows this kid, and where he comes from. I listen to his history and feel I know him already. He’s me. He lost his father when he was twelve years old. He has a younger sibling that he’s close to, just like me and Jeremy. Baseball is the thing that drives this kid, too. We have so many things in common. I’m going to make sure he stays on his path and doesn’t get swooped up in the drug world. That could end him and his dreams. I’m fucking not going to let that happen. I was so lucky to escape that life, and I want to make sure he does too.
“Mostly these kids are great. But don’t let pity inform your decisions. You have to get over it, you know what I mean? They’ll pull at your heartstrings and then you’re screwed. Try to deal with what is, not what you feel. Can you do that?” I’m not sure I can. I don’t have control over my heart like that. Fuck, I hope I can be the man these kids need. “We have an anti-drug unit that might be able to help keep this kid out of the hands of the gangs. It's got to be a priority of ours, you get me?”
Derek looks at me and busts up laughing, What the fuck, right? I know I have an incredulous look on my face.
“Don’t worry, you’ll learn. You will, I promise. And you know you can always come to me for help.” I’ve heard Derek’s really involved, but I’m still surprised. He knows every kid, every family and every problem. He’s familiar with how these gangs operate, too. I have so much to learn. I’ve never faced off with a gang member, but I’m willing to do just about anything if it means saving one of my kids. I remember when they approached me back during my lost year. I’m grateful I was too busy to fall under their spell of money and family living.
“So, tell me about Charles, my little sports hero.” My eyes sweep over to look into Derek’s face.
“Charles, hmm…I think he’s a cool kid. I hang out with him at the dining hall and have gotten to know him. He’s got some problems, of course. He got caught shoplifting just last month. You’re going to have your hands full with him. But I think if you stay on top of him and he understands what it takes to get that Triple-A ball contract…well, things should work out. Problem is, he has no support at home. He goes hungry too many days, and school…you know it’s rough on him. I believe in him, Jack. If we could just be involved with one boy, he’d be our biggest success story. But as you can see, you have a long line of boys depending on us.” Derek looks at me with his warm brown eyes, and I can tell he really cares.
“I’ll try to access the most immediate needs and catch up quickly,” I say. I believe this is a simple task: read through all their files and feel I can know them on my first day. I’m such a fool.
“I want you to go meet every kid here in this file. Get to know them. Do a home assessment if you want. I need to know that you will reach out to every kid on your roster, make them comfortable with you. Can you do that?”
“Yeah. Sure. I’ll start right away. By the way, I met Ted, but I don’t know who my supervisor is. I need to know who’s here and what resources I have to turn to. Is there petty cash so I can take these kids out for lunch? Expectations? I need more than this.” I pull the file towards me, and I know that I’m not as equipped to do this job as I thought.
“Aww, Ted…that must’ve been fun. He’s a bitter man, Jack. I'm thinking of letting him go. Don't follow in his footsteps. Anyway, I’ll ask your supervisor to stop by. His name is James, he’s cool. Very knowledgeable, and he’s here to support you in everything you want to try.” Derek pulls out his wallet and drops a few hundred dollars on my desk—“For your lunches”—and walks out the door.
Shit, shit, shit.
Did I piss Derek off? Maybe I shouldn’t have asked about petty cash. Am I supposed to be out of pocket? I don’t mind; I just need to know the rules.
Before I can figure it out, a man walks into my office. He stretches out his hand and says, “Welcome to my team, Jack. I’m James. Let's sit and talk, okay?” Relief floods me; I’m grateful to have him right in front of me. I’m shaken by my conversations with Ted and Derek. I’m feeling out of my depth. I’m reeling from too much information and maybe not enough. I hope James can ground me in some sort of way.
“Hey James, nice to meet you. Yes, please,” I gesture to a chair, “take a seat, I have lots of questions.”
James sits down in front of me, and I start to relax. He's a man in his late 40’s, dressed in a polo shirt and jeans. This is my opportunity; I’m not going to squander it.
James is around six feet, and I’d guess he’s of mixed race. White and black? White and Cuban? Not sure about what mix, but his smooth light mocha skin and his blue eyes…I bet the ladies love him. Well, much more than me, for sure.
“So, when you go meet the kids, try to get some time with their parents. It’s good to know what kind of support they have at home. You’ll find notes in their files, but I want you to have personal knowledge, okay?” James is cool as fuck, and I think I can learn a lot from him.
“Sure, of course, just need you to know that this is the first time I’ve had a job like this. I’ll put my all into it.” I try to reassure him, but really aren’t I trying to reassure myself?
“None of us have all the answers, Jack. Don’t stress. Just do your best. It’s all any of us can do. And come to me, dude, anytime, about anything. Here are my numbers.” James pulls out a card and hands it to me. I look it over…work number, email, cell number. He’s accessible, that’s for damn sure.
“Thanks, James, thanks for stopping by, I don’t want to let you down. I don’t want to let these kids down either.” I think of all the ways I could let those kids down, and I feel my heart stutter.
James stands up. “That’s what it's all about, dude. Let me know how your home visits go.” And with that, he slips out.
I start culling through the files, and I find information for each kid underneath. They seem incomplete to me. Did this Ted dude do any fucking work at all?
My first call is to Tomas. I start at the top of my list and work my way down. The phone rings a few times, but finally a thin female voice answers. “Hello?”
“Is this Tomas’s mom? My name is Jack, from Derek’s Kids,” I say gently. I don’t know what to expect, but I’m going to try my best to get her to see me.
“Oh yes, Hi Mr. Jack. Is Tomas okay? Is something wrong?” Mrs. Gerrard seems very concerned.
“He’s fine, Mrs. Gerrard. I’m his new counselor, and I want to introduce myself to you is all, don’t worry.” I hope that soothes her. She sounds exhausted.
“Good, oh good, so what can I do for you?” She sounds impatient. I hear a baby crying in the background.
“I’d like to come by and meet you and spend some time with him. Is that okay with you?” I hope I can make an inroad into their family life.
“Sure, just come on by whenever you want. I’ve got to go. Shelly needs me to change her diaper, and I have to make a bottle for her.” Mrs. Gerrard sounds harried, almost to breaking point. I feel bad for adding to her things to do list.
“Okay, I plan to stop by in the next couple of days. See you then.” The phone clicks off. Dangit, I should have insisted on a specific time, but I need to take it easy on myself. I’m just learning the ropes.
My first stop will be Mrs. Gerrard’s place. After that, I make appointments with each parent as I call. No more of this ‘drop by any time’ stuff; I want to know when I can see them. I hope the kids will be home, but I can’t make that happen.
It’s a place to start. By the time I call and speak to every parent, it’s time to go home for the night.
I want more than anything to do this righ
t.
Tomorrow’s going to be another busy day. I have my hands full already.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jack
I’m exhausted and drop onto the couch as soon as I get home. I grab my bottle of whiskey from the kitchen as I walk through my apartment.
I’m beat to the bone. Those phone calls just about wrecked me, and tomorrow is going to be a mess of meetings and notes. I want to complete these kids' files. I think that asshole Ted did a shit job of keeping track of my kids. That changes now.
I slurp the whiskey right out of the bottle and grab my weed. I pack my pipe and take a deep drag. This is the quickest way I know to drop my worries at the door.
My mind wanders to Alex. Her curves are perfect, and I want to bury myself in her. I love how she giggles, and our connection is amazing. I’m missing her. I really love hanging out with this girl; she makes me so happy.
I grab my cell phone and scroll to her name. I put in the call. As I wait for the call to connect, I take another swig of whiskey.
“Hi Jack,” she purrs. My cock stands to attention just hearing that sexy voice.
“You busy?” that’s code for you wanna fuck? I always want her. Boy, do I want her.
“Sorry, I have to bounce right now, I’m going to be late to work. I’ll be home at 4 tomorrow morning if you want to come by. I’ll leave a key under the mat.”
I’d love to, but the thought is fleeting. I know how bone-weary tired I am. But I need some Alex time. “I’ll try to be there. If I fall asleep, I might not make it. “
“It’s cool, come over if you can. If not, I don’t work tomorrow night. See you whenever, Jack.” She hangs up, and I can tell she’s in a hurry. Makes me wonder about this job of hers. Why does it make her so fucking stressed out? By now, you’d think I’d know more about it, but nada, nothing...she shares nothing about it. Stop it, I keep telling myself as I take another hit from my pipe.
The Call Page 11
