“Ryan!” Cass was climbing onto the Bronco’s hood. Right as her boot slipped, she called over to me, “Help!”
I jogged over to her side, putting my hand right on her ass cheek to push her up. “You all right there, little lady?” I asked as I hopped up next to her.
She nodded quickly while staring at the blazing bonfire. “This was a good idea. I’m really going to miss him and these types of nights, ya know.”
I put my arm around her slender shoulders, tucking her into my side. “Promise me we’ll always have these nights. Cam would want us to continue the tradition.”
She sloppily kissed my neck. “Pinky promise.”
I took Cassidy’s outstretched pinky, hooking it with mine, and then kissed the back of her fingers. Our eyes locked, and I saw something in her that I had never seen before. I knew she had always had a little thing for me, but this was different. It wasn’t a crush or even lust; Cassidy was looking at me like I had always wanted her to look at me. It was so dumb—she was my best friend’s little sister—but I had been in love with her for over a year, ever since she meant to kiss my cheek with excitement the day she finally got her braces off. She’d missed and our lips had briefly connected. It was the smallest of moments, but it meant everything to me.
With our hands still locked together, I set my beer down behind us. Brushing her hair behind her ear, I watched as the glow of the fire danced across her soft cheeks and flickered in her eyes.
She leaned in and I met her halfway. Our lips dusted against each other’s, unhurried and delicate. My hand cradled the side of her face as I scooted in a little closer. Cass’s free hand pulled at the side of my shirt as her lips parted and the subtlest of moans released from her.
Pulling away, I searched her eyes. “How much have you had to drink?” I asked her.
“Enough.” She batted her eyelashes before pressing her lips together and leaning in for another kiss.
“It’s not a good idea.” I pulled her into my arms instead of giving in to every desire I had.
She pushed me away, hurt washing over her face. “I knew you couldn’t ever want me.” Tears were already welling up in her eyes.
“I don’t want to do anything with you that you might not remember, or worse, that you might regret in the morning. If you still want to kiss me when you wake up tomorrow, then I am all yours.” I kissed her forehead as she melted into my arms.
“Deal.”
Chapter 4
Over a decade later
Ryan
“Ax, a minute?” Buck walked up to me in the barn after my fifth shot of whiskey out of my coffee cup. He was adjusting his cut, dusting off his president patch from his ride down the long gravel drive.
“What’s up?” I poured him a shot in my mug and handed it over.
Buck slapped me on the back, right where my skull and bones were as he took his seat next to me. “You and this damn mug, I will never understand.” He fired it down and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
I shrugged. “No one knows if I’m drinking coffee or booze out of it.”
“We all know, brother. It’s never coffee,” Buck badgered with a wink before explaining why he had sat down with me. “I have a job for you. It’s risky, but I think you’re the best man for it.”
I cracked my neck. “Whatever you need, I’m your guy.”
“That’s what I needed to hear. Damn, I knew I made the right choice making you my number two.”
Buck went on to explain that it was a delicate situation, but I was going to meet up with Bear, the president of our Atlanta charter, to help him find a member of a rival club and get some information out of him. It was all I needed to know. The details of why any of it was needed didn’t matter to me. I just cared about the fact that my president needed me to help another charter.
I rinsed out my coffee mug and had a prospect give me a ride home. I had a mission to get to first thing in the morning. It was time to put my game-face on.
* * *
I got to Bear’s house right before dusk. The thirteen-hour drive was longer than I really had the stamina for on my Harley, but time was of the essence and I could sleep when I was dead.
I was greeted by a sweet smile as Bear’s old lady opened the door for me.
“You must be worn out,” she said as she ushered me inside. “I’m Scarlett. Follow me. Bear’s in the kitchen.”
“Nice to meet you, sweetheart.” I shadowed her tiny frame into the kitchen, where Bear was standing at the sink washing the dishes. They seemed like such an odd match—Bear was a good ten years older than Scarlett and about a foot taller, maybe more. She was an itty-bitty thing, and he was a beast of a man. He was gruff and rough around the edges while she radiated sweetness. But, when he turned and looked at her, it all made sense. All the physical shit, age—none of it matters when you can look at your partner the way Bear looked down at his girl.
“Ax, long time.” He gave me a quick hug before taking a seat at the table.
Scarlett got us a few beers from the refrigerator.
“Thanks, darlin’.” Bear gave her a light snack on the ass. “We got some club shit to deal with.”
“Say no more.” She kissed Bear on the cheek before turning to me. “It was a pleasure, Ax. Take care of my man, will ya?”
“Sure thing, hon.” I gave her a quick wave before she started for the steps the led upstairs. “She seems great.” I pointed up to the ceiling where I could hear Scarlett’s light footsteps, walking around in their room.
“That’s an understatement. She’s a godsend.” Bear leaned back in his chair. “So, you ready to go catch a bad guy?”
I nodded. “You tell me what needs to be done and I’m your man.”
“I caught wind that a guy we’ve had a hit on for a while now just rolled into town a few days ago. He’s planning on leaving first thing in the mornin’ so we have to do this tonight. He has no idea we’re onto him so his guard will be down. I have a few of my guys tailin’ him right now and when he’s alone, I’ll be getting a call.”
“Sounds good. Buck said we have to get some information out of him?”
Bear pursed his lips. “We’re going to make him sing like a damn canary.”
* * *
It only took a few hours for Bear to get the green light and for us to be outside the Sinners’ temporary safe house.
I had my revolver at the ready, but Bear made me put it away. “There is one lookout in the front, and no one else is here but the target, Ralph. Use your knife on the guard and I’ll surprise little Ralphy by going in through the back.”
“All right, see you in a minute.”
I snuck up behind the guard, grabbed his short hair in my fist, and yanked his head back swiftly. Before he could even scream, my hunting knife was slicing his throat wide open and the sound of blood gushing amidst his final gurgling breaths was all that was left.
From inside the house, I heard Bear shout, “Didn’t think you’d see any of us again, did you fucker?”
A loud slam came from the back room as I made my way through the dark house. It was the Unacceptables’ modus operandi to never turn the lights on or remove our masks. Too many of our enemies had cameras, and staying out of jail and off hit lists was a top priority.
“Burn a girl alive in our parking lot and you think we’re not going to come after you again?”
I saw he was missing his thumb, and it clicked—I knew who this guy was, and he was missing way more than just a digit.
“Ralph, come on. Just tell big ol’ grizzly Bear over here what he wants to know and we won’t cut your dick off too. You’re already halfway to being as smooth as a Ken doll down there. Do you want to have to piss into a bag for the rest of your pitiful life?”
“You’re just going to have to kill me, you fucking cowards.” Ralph spit in Bear’s face.
“Wrong answer.” I chuckled, ripping his right boot off. “You see, you have so many more things I can slice and dice off
. I was really close to the corpsman in my unit while I was in Iraq, and when we were bored he would explain to me how to cut an enemy up without letting him bleed out too fast in order to get as much information from him as we needed before he died.”
That was all it took. He knew from experience that we weren’t all talk. He’d survived one torture situation, and he wasn’t foolish enough to think he was going to endure another without giving us everything we needed to know. I kept promising he was going to live if he just told us where the other safe houses were and who had actually pulled the trigger on Abel. Such a damn idiot—he should have known better than to trust two men who were brothers of the guys who’d sawed his nads off with a bread knife.
Chapter 5
A few days later
Cassidy
“Aunt Cass, look!” Kathleen hopped over to me in her little pink Chucks, her brown pigtails flying around as we walked through the quaint boutique. She was holding a white rubber duck that had a unicorn horn with a rainbow mane and tale.
I scooped my best friend’s daughter up into my arms. “Well, isn’t that the cutest ducky in the whole wide world,” I exclaimed.
Teresa shuffled up to us with summer dresses slung over her arm and a few shoe boxes cradled in the other. Her messy bun was falling out and hair wisped down into her eyes. “Help, Cass! I’m being attacked!”
I rushed to her aid, throwing her hair back up on top of her head, securing it with the tie and pushing her sunglasses up more to help keep her brunette locks in check. “Better?”
“Thanks. I’m gonna try these on. Kathleen, be good for Aunt Cass.”
I gave the seven-year-old a squeeze. “What should we name this little lady?” I asked, pointing to the toy rubber duck still in her hands.
A woman with a baby cradled in her arms smiled at us. Her husband was standing next to her with a motorcycle club’s cut over his flannel shirt.
“Hey, Raine, isn’t that a Miss Gilda?” the biker asked before kissing the petite woman’s cheek.
She nodded and then sweetly said to Kathleen and me, “I had one of those when I was a little girl. She was my favorite. Her name is Miss Gilda, and I still have mine after all these years.”
Kathleen bounced a little in my arms, holding the duck high in the air. “Miss Gilda is awesome!”
I giggled a little. “Thanks, you just made her day.”
“It’s a small world for sure. I haven’t seen one of those in years.” The woman shot me a tight smile as she grabbed her husband’s hand to walk out of the store.
After Teresa decided nothing in the store was going to work for her and I bought Kathleen her very own Miss Gilda, we decided to head to the pizza place at the other end of the mall for lunch.
I was halfway through my second slice of pepperoni heaven when my heart stopped. My jaw hit the floor, and I dropped the pizza onto my plate, blinking rapidly. There was no way I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. I was staring at the man standing with the young couple I had just spoken with in the store in complete disbelief.
“Cass?” Teresa shook my shoulder a little bit. “Cassidy? Are you ok? What is it?”
I turned to look at her. My entire body prickled with heat, and it took me a few seconds to spit the words out. “I think Ryan Axston is standing over by the bar.”
She put her hand on mine. “Honey, I have no idea who the heck you are talking about.”
“H-He was…ma-my first,” I stammered.
Her eyes grew ten times bigger as she followed my gaze over to the man I didn’t know anymore, the man who’d changed my life, the man I’d never thought I would see again. “He’s handsome,” she declared quickly.
“Of all the things to say, that’s what you go with?” I scoffed, shoving her shoulder playfully.
I glanced back over to where he had been standing and jumped in my seat when I saw him walking over to me. His eyes were locked with mine, his deep onyx irises boring holes into my soul as he strode closer and closer to us.
“Kathleen, how about we go get some ice cream?” Teresa grabbed her daughter’s hand after gathering up their shopping bags.
“Yeah! Ice cream!” Kathleen’s elation radiated from her as she hopped off her seat.
“Good luck,” Teresa whispered before rushing away from our table, towing her daughter by the hand.
“Wait, don’t…” I tried to stop her, but she was already opening the door to exit.
My best friend had abandoned me as my first love crashed back into my life. Fucking great. I rolled my eyes while running my fingers through my long hair.
Deep breaths.
Stay calm.
He’s ancient history.
“Cass?” Ryan sank down into the seat across from me.
I sat there like an idiot staring at his long beard and hair, his gray whiskers making him look far older than he actually was. He was wearing a black baseball cap, a white t-shirt, a leather cut that matched that of the other guy’s he was with, jeans, and cowboy boots. Other than the hair and cut, he looked just like the old Ryan. Well, he did have sleeves of tattoos now, but I’d always known that was inevitable.
I could tell the years hadn’t been kind to him, but there he was sitting at the damn table across from me, and I was paralyzed. I had played this moment over and over in my mind for years, praying that Ryan Axston would swoop in and become my knight in shining armor, but I had come to the realization that was a naïve notion…or was it?
He cleared his throat. “How have you been?” he finally spit out after tearing up a brown napkin with nervous hands.
“Ryan Axston, as I live and breathe. How long has it been?” I let the words come out as nonchalantly as possible. Slowly, I let my eyes meet his. It was a terrible idea. Eye contact was my weakness with him; it got me every damn time, and I had to sit on my hands to hide how badly they were shaking.
“A little over ten years, I reckon. I’ve been around for a bit, just haven’t felt like seeking people out.”
His words stung all the way down to my core. “You’ve been back in Killeen?” I asked.
He nodded. “Well, more like close by. I’ve been dealing with some demons for a while. Didn’t feel right coming back to these parts until it was all settled for the most part.”
The couple and their baby came up to the table. “Ax? Everything all right?” the man asked.
Ryan looked up to his friends. “Raine, Ryder, this is Cassidy Lewis. She and I go way back. She knew me before I was even a jarhead.”
“It’s nice to actually meet you.” Raine beamed over at me with a toothy grin as she lay her sleeping baby down in the stroller.
I waved. “Nice to meet y’all.” Shoving away from the table, I gathered my shopping bags. “I should really go find my friend. I drove her and we need to get the little one home.”
Ryan shot up to his feet, seizing my left hand with his. He stared down at my ring finger, thumbing the diamond that decorated it. “Have dinner with me.”
I shook my head. “That’s not a good idea, Ryan.”
His eyes were locked on mine as he worked his jaw. I knew he wasn’t going to take the rejection to his demand lightly. “It’s one meal. Please, Cass. For old time’s sake.”
“Go see Nate. He’s the one you should be trying to patch things up with,” I bit back, sharply pulling my hand away from his.
Ryder nodded at Ryan knowingly. “See ya at church later, Ax.”
Ryder and Raine said goodbye to us before walking away, pushing their baby’s stroller together. They were seriously a damn adorable couple, and focusing on them helped pull me away from the smoldering stare I could so easily get lost in.
Kevin. Remember Kevin.
My fiancé’s face flashed into the back of my mind. One look at Ryan and the love my life was an afterthought. Not good, Cass. Not good at all.
“Ryan…I can’t. We can’t.” I turned to walk away. I could hear his boots hurriedly stomping behind me.
“
You know I don’t take no for an answer, Cass.” His low voice came from behind me as I stopped dead in my tracks. “It’s only dinner—what could it hurt?”
Whipping around, I threw my hand in the air, planting it firmly on his chest. I needed to show him I had grown a backbone since I was seventeen. Looking up into his dark eyes, I fought to stay firm in my resolve. “Maybe it’s time you learned that you don’t always get what you want in life, Axston—I sure had to when you never wrote back to me.” I threw the words at him, yelling loudly as he stood there gaping at me. The entire restaurant was staring at that point.
He rubbed the back of his neck before narrowing his gaze as he rubbed the back of his neck. I could see all the things he wanted to say swimming in his eyes, but he just turned and headed for the back door. It felt just like the last time we had seen each other ten years before.
“Cass, I can’t. I made a promise.” Ryan wrapped his arms around my shoulders as I started to cry into his hard chest.
“I just don’t know why you didn’t tell me you had signed your life away. How could you after what just happened to your brother? What would Cameron have thought?” I blubbered into his shirt as he pulled me in tighter, my mascara leaving black stains on the white cotton.
“I didn’t want the last few weeks I had at home to be ruined by everyone being worried about me and trying to talk me out of it.” His voice was muffled as he spoke with his lips pressed against the top of my head.
We sat on the tailgate of his truck in silence as my heart shattered into a million pieces. I had finally gotten the courage to have real feelings for Ryan, and there he was telling me he was leaving for training in less than twelve hours.
“I’ll wait for you,” I whimpered.
Tucking me into his side, Ryan leaned down to kiss me. “I can’t ask that of you.”
The Unacceptables Series Box Set Two: Books Five through Nine with Exclusive Bonus Chapters Page 8
