She picked up the mug of coffee she was currently drinking, the cute image of a red truck being driven by a dog wearing a Santa hat, with a Christmas tree poking out the back, doing nothing for her. She put the mug down with a sigh on the pristine white page of her planner, accepting the fact that she’d probably just created a coffee ring on the page. And she didn’t even care. All of the accessories Sam had picked out for her were still sitting in their packaging. As if she could ever open them.
“You suck, Charlotte,” she said aloud in her silent condo, the words, spoken to no one, sounding extra pathetic. But there was nothing that could fill the cavernous hole inside her. Well, there was something. Or someone. But she’d ruined that.
Or you can live in that pleasant color-coded world you’ve created and pretend that’s living. But, baby, that’s not living. You and me, when we’re together, that’s living. Think about that when you’re alone in the city. Think of me, of who you know I am. You know I would never walk away from you. I won’t give up on you, Char. How did he know her like that? He saw right through her and knew she was scared, that she didn’t believe in him. And she had never been more alive, more real, more herself, than when she was with him.
Wyatt was everything she’d ever wanted. The opposite of her father. They may have worn the same uniform, but they were different men through and through. Wyatt had found a way to deal with pain and keep going. Wyatt knew how to love and knew how to fight for it.
And she had proven to Wyatt that she couldn’t be trusted. She had run when she should have stayed. But what could she have done? Her one shot at having a perfect life—a life she had never even imagined could be hers—had been ruined by her fear. Her inability to trust someone with her heart.
“Charlotte, it’s me! Please open the door!”
Her sister’s voice pierced through her thoughts and the silence of the condo. She stood slowly, a part of her really happy that Olivia was here. The other part of her didn’t know exactly how to feel. When Olivia had shut her out, she’d been deeply hurt, and she’d vowed not to let any of her family members, except Grandma Ruby, get close to her again, but then when she’d heard everything Olivia had been through, forgiveness had come easily and she’d let her guard down. Only to let herself be hurt again. But she wanted to believe there was an explanation. She wanted to understand. She didn’t want to go through life without Olivia again.
She opened the door and smiled at the sight of Olivia and Dawn. Her heart swelled as Dawn’s adorable face lit up and she smiled and banged her fists around at the sight of Charlotte. Charlotte laughed and held open her arms. A second later she was holding her precious niece and kissing her, inhaling her sweet baby scent.
Olivia scrambled into the condo, carting that pack ’n play and oversized diaper bag like a pro, dropping them on the tiled entry. Her sister looked as bad as she did. Her hair had probably been in some kind of ponytail at some point in the last twenty-four hours, she had dark circles under her eyes, and she was wearing pajamas under her winter coat. “I’m so glad you opened the door. I was so worried you were going to ignore me, not that I could blame you,” Olivia said, taking off her coat and boots.
Charlotte felt comforted by the fact that her sister was worried. Maybe it wasn’t nice of her, but it felt good to know that Olivia cared, that she knew she’d hurt Charlotte again. “As if I wouldn’t open the door, Liv.”
Olivia’s chin wobbled, and her eyes filled with tears. “I’ve been such a crappy sister to you these last three years. I can’t even explain how much I hate myself for ruining what we had and for not being there for you, like you were for me growing up.”
Charlotte shook her head, her own eyes filling with tears, her throat feeling tight. She held onto Dawn a little tighter. “Don’t say that,” she managed to whisper.
“I have to. You need to know how deeply I regret shutting you out. And the Dad thing … it was completely unplanned. He reached out to me, and I didn’t want anything to do with him. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell you because I knew you would be mad, and I had just gotten you back in my life. I thought he’d just skulk off into the night again, I didn’t think he’d actually show up and want to be a part of our lives.”
“Really?” Charlotte whispered, those words meaning so much right now.
Olivia nodded. “Really. There was no plot. There was no secret relationship with him. Nothing. We didn’t even talk on the phone. It was a text. You can even read it. I should have known that Mom was involved in all of this.”
Charlotte rolled her eyes. “Yes, I guess we both should have seen that one coming. Do you want something to eat or drink?” she asked, leading the way into the sitting area of the condo, not wanting to keep talking about the past. Her sister had already given her what she needed to hear, she didn’t need more.
Olivia nodded and set up the pack ’n play in pro speed. “How about we order Thai and drink and plan how I can help you fix your life?”
She let out a startled laugh before placing Dawn in the playpen while Olivia gave her a few toys. “Yes to the Thai, but my life doesn’t need fixing, and you don’t have to worry about that.”
“Right. Okay, I’m ordering the Thai right now. You open the wine, for me—you’re drinking coffee—because you won’t be staying here long. I’m starving. I haven’t eaten since last night. I’m going on coffee only,” she said, pulling her phone out of her pocket.
“Sounds good. I haven’t eaten either,” she said, opening her favorite bottle of merlot for Olivia and brewing more coffee for herself, not even wanting to question the remark about her not staying here long.
“Okay, food ordered. Now, of course you haven’t eaten, you have a broken heart. But hopefully I can fix that in under thirty minutes, so by the time the food gets here you can enjoy it and we’ve moved onto the planning stage,” she said, taking a sip from the glass Charlotte held out for her.
Charlotte laughed nervously. Her sister could be pretty persuasive. “Liv, I don’t think it’s going to be that simple. I really messed things up. I pulled a Dad. I pulled what his ex-wife pulled on him,” she said, flopping onto the white couch, her coffee swooshing precariously close to the rim, and her heart rate didn’t even accelerate at the prospect of a brown stain on white upholstery. Who cared about her couch at this point? It’s not like anyone actually came here. It’s not like Wyatt would ever be sitting here. They were worlds apart, really. Just picturing him there was laughable. But she had so easily fit into his home and his life, and even though it wasn’t one she’d pictured for herself, it was the best dream. She’d been living that dream for weeks. This sterile condo was her real life, though.
Olivia curled her legs under her body and took a drink of wine, her eyes not leaving Charlotte’s. “That’s not the way it works, Char. You really think that man is just going to hate you forever and get over you in a couple of days? Also, you’re not his ex. You didn’t marry him, give birth to his child, and then just check out forever. You told him you needed time.”
She put her mug down on the coffee table with a thud and caught the giraffe that Dawn flung in her direction. Smiling at her niece, she handed back her giraffe and tried to not run from the feelings churning inside her. She didn’t know how to talk about this, what Olivia was trying to draw from her. Wyatt had been able to bring out this side of her—he was the one who could dig deep and feel and love. But it felt … she felt like her thoughts and words were stilted and she desperately wanted to cling to them and keep them inside.
“I can’t go back there. I said I needed time because it’s true, but I can’t go back. I can’t live with Mom and Dad popping in at a moment’s notice. That’s like a nightmare, Liv.”
Olivia choked on her wine. “Fine, I get it. But what’s your solution? You’re going to throw away a future with a guy like that because of your … eccentric parents? Seriously?”
The doorbell rang and Charlotte hopped off the couch to open it. After getting the paper
bag filled with delicious-smelling Thai food plated, while Olivia handed Dawn a snack cup filled with Cheerios, they sat back down on the couches and ate.
“I’m still waiting for a reply, and you’d better hurry because then I’m going to have to feed Dawn and that’ll take all my attention with the way she’s been flinging food around these days,” she said, shooting the baby a smile.
Charlotte laughed. “Okay, well, I don’t have a reply you’re going to like. It’s not just Mom and Dad. It’s … everything. It’s exactly what Mom and Dad represent. What if Wyatt’s ex shows up one day out of the blue, and he has a chance to reunite his family again?”
Olivia blotted her mouth with a napkin. “That’s not going to happen, and even if his ex did show up again, do you really think Wyatt would just jump back into a life with her? She broke his daughter’s heart and is MIA. You can’t just forgive that.”
“But what about Sam? He might do it for her sake.”
It was her greatest fear. Being left behind. Again. It had taken her entire childhood and so much of her adult life to get over her father leaving. Or maybe she never had. Maybe her actions right now were all because she’d never truly gotten over that abandonment. But Wyatt leaving her would rob her of the rest of her heart. She didn’t know how she would recover. Coming back to this empty condo alone had already made her painfully aware of how hollow her life had been before he came into it. And she had come back on her own terms. If she were coming back here because Wyatt had left her … she didn’t know how she would cope with that.
“There are things I’ve learned. It’s taken me a long time to learn them, and I’ve made huge mistakes, but there are warning signs. There must have been warning signs with Dad too. We were too young to see them. But with Will there were warning signs that I already told you about. You can’t tell me that Wyatt is the same. And the fact that he came back into your life is no coincidence.”
Charlotte stuffed her mouth with a heaping forkful of pad Thai, wishing the carbs would actually bring her some kind of comfort. There was one man who’d been able to give her comfort in this world, whom she trusted, and she’d run from him. Like a coward. Everything Olivia was saying was right, but that didn’t exactly help Charlotte now.
“I know. He’s not the same. That’s not fair to Wyatt, and I realize that. But so many of the … weird decisions I’ve made in my life are because of how we grew up. I mean, I know I’m an adult and I’m not going to sit here crying about what Mom and Dad should have done, but it’s like, stuff I never realized until now. I thought I was living the life I wanted, but when I met Wyatt I realized I wasn’t. I was living a life that was safe. I built this imaginary world for myself in a way. Because I didn’t let anyone in, I controlled everything. I run my own business. I live by myself. Even the two girls I hired work remotely, and I’ve never met them. I don’t date, Liv. Like, no one.”
Olivia frowned, putting down her empty plate. “No, that’s not true. What about that guy? You know … um, what’s his name?”
Charlotte’s cheeks burned. “There was no guy. Ever. I made him up. Well, okay, not entirely. He did ask to sit across from me at the coffee shop. Then he did ask me out for dinner. But I said no.”
Olivia’s face crumpled. “Oh, Char …”
Charlotte ate the rest of the pad Thai in an effort to collect her thoughts and take a break from the embarrassment she was feeling. She had projected to the world that she had it all together. She was a fearless go-getter, a successful entrepreneur who didn’t put up with any nonsense. The truth was that she had been hiding from life.
“It’s fine. Really,” she said, putting her empty plate on the coffee table and crumpling up the napkin.
“It’s a good thing I’m here. Time to save your life. Here’s what you’re going to do. You’re going to take a shower, fix yourself up, pack your bags, get in your car, and drive to Silver Springs. I mean, like, not to Grandma’s—avoid that house until after you have successfully made up with Wyatt.”
A surge of hope coursed through her. That sounded like the perfect plan. It was what she wanted to do. She could make it to Silver Springs for midnight. She sat still.
“Up. Go. Now,” Olivia said, standing and picking up Dawn.
Charlotte swallowed hard, past the lump in her throat, past the fear. “What if he rejects me? It’s been almost a week.”
Olivia lifted her chin. “He won’t. Trust me. Trust him. Now, while you get ready, I’m going to tell you all the things that have happened since you left,” she said, standing.
Charlotte’s eyes widened as her sister swung her wine glass a little too wildly over Charlotte’s planner. Charlotte thought she might die. “No,” she whispered as her gaze went from the drips of coffee to the perfect planner sheet. Now that her life was going to get back on track, she cared about her plans again.
Olivia simply tsked and shook her head. “This is life, Char. Real life. It’s filled with dogeared pages, coffee rings, and smudged pens. It’s snotty Kleenexes and, in your case, a hot man. Being afraid to take a chance, walking around hiding behind the hurt of our childhood? That’s over. We take chances. Informed, wise chances, but still. This is not the narrative I want for Dawn. We need to do better. Go after that hot cop and just … live your life. I swear, if you don’t text be by midnight, telling me you’re in Silver Springs, I will send Mom after you. Oh, which reminds me, I need to tell you what’s happening back home so you’re not shocked.”
Charlotte paused in her bedroom door. “I’ve been gone less than a week.”
Olivia smiled mysteriously and picked up Dawn. “Mom and Dad are going out on a New Year’s Eve date.”
Charlotte groaned. “You have got to be kidding me.”
Olivia laughed and shook her head. Dawn did the same. “I know. Talk about a train wreck. I give them one week, tops. I saved the best for last, though.”
Her muscles tightened. She wasn’t sure she really wanted to know. “Don’t make me wait.”
Oliva gave her a wide smile. “Grandma has a boyfriend.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
NEW YEAR’S EVE, PRESENT DAY
THE CHRISTMAS HOUSE
“Happy New Year!” Ruby called out before stepping outside and quickly shutting the front door behind her. She didn’t wait for their replies and the inevitable questions. Tonight her daughter would have to deal with her problems on her own. She took comfort in knowing that Charlotte was on her way home, that her granddaughters had made up and would find their way in the world. And she was slightly pleased that Wendy and Mac might be finding their second chance.
Tomorrow was a new year, and she would celebrate with all of them. But tonight was for her. She had spent a lifetime waiting, and she didn’t have another one to spare. Just as she knew he would be, Harry was waiting on the porch for her. A giddy feeling, like the kind reserved for youth, coursed through her as he held out his hand. She clasped onto it for dear life.
“Ruby, you look beautiful,” he said.
She smiled up at him. “You look wonderful yourself,” she said, taking in the dark wool coat and suit underneath. He had always been so handsome.
“Before we go to the restaurant, I want to ask you something I should have asked that first night I saw you.”
Ruby’s smile dipped, not knowing what the question was, barely remembering the first time she had met him. “All right,” she said softly.
“Will you dance with me?”
Her mouth dropped open. “Here?”
He nodded, slowly lifting her hand and, before she could even feel silly, she lifted her other hand to his shoulder. Soon they were dancing in the dim moonlight, under the twinkling white Christmas lights, on her beloved front porch. “That night, at the church social … Richard and I were standing together and you walked in, your dark hair pulled back with a black velvet bow, wearing a red velvet dress. I told him that I was going to ask you to dance and that one day you were the girl I was going to marry.”
She gasped as the reality of what he was telling her sank in. Tears blurred her vision. He’d never asked her to dance. Richard had walked over to her. And the rest … she lifted her eyes up to his, the regret in them making her ache with the knowledge of what he had known so many years ago. “You never asked me,” she whispered.
He clenched his jaw. “He beat me to it. But I’m here now. I can’t let another new year start without you knowing how I feel about you. You may think it’s crazy, but I fell in love with you that night, and each night that we spent in each other’s company. I knew you were my soul mate, Ruby. Sometimes the heart just knows. I’ve spent a lifetime wondering about you, and now you’re here. We have nothing stopping us anymore.”
“Richard,” she managed to choke, emotion clogging her throat. Her mind was swirling as memories flooded her. So many years. She had told herself she needed no one. But throughout her life, she had needed people, Not the people she thought she had needed, but people who knew how to love without judgment, who knew what love truly meant. Maybe all she had needed were the right people. The people that The Christmas House had brought into her life. The man standing in front of her … he was the right people.
He smiled gently, and they stopped swaying to the imaginary music as he cupped one side of her face. She couldn’t help the sigh that escaped her lips. “I have so many things to share with you, so many stories. We have a lifetime of catching up to do. But someone very wise once told me that grace would lead me home, and maybe that’s what’s happened. This was always meant to be my home. And you were meant to join me here. Is it too late to take back every single ‘no’ that I told you?” she asked, her stomach in knots, her chest aching with the idea that he would walk away again.
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