by Virlyce
“More dwarves?” a voice asked. E and Zappy frowned as a group of boulders with gemstones for eyes rolled outside of the cave in the mountain. One of the boulders turned around and asked, “Whose turn is it?”
“My turn! It’s my turn!” a boulder with green eyes said. “I bet fifty pebbles that I can beat your record.”
Zappy cleared his throat. “Excuse me, you’re addressing the king of the dwarves, His Gloriousness E.”
The boulders fell silent before exchanging glances with one another. “You’re the dwarf king?” the green-eyed boulder asked Zappy.
“No,” Zappy said and sighed. “He is.”
The boulders’ gazes shifted from the well-dressed dwarf to the one that was wearing pajamas and looked like he had just rolled out of bed. Then they shifted back to Zappy. “Well, I guess we can start the game,” the green-eyed boulder said. “Fifty meters and a terrified face, right? I can beat that.”
“I knew expressions had a role in the scoring system,” E said with a grin. He poked Zappy. “I told you so.”
“Your Gloriousness, please. They’re about to attack us,” Zappy said. “Can you save your childish antics for later?”
“As king, I declare all my antics to be non-childish,” E said with a snort. He clapped his hands together. A dozen sets of metal armor materialized in the air behind his back. “Seize them.” The armors swooped down and grabbed the boulders, preventing them from moving. The boulders cried out and let out vibrations, but the elementals couldn’t do anything but leave their physical bodies and reenter the earth.
“You’re a bully! We’re telling the clan master!”
E watched with a blank expression as the gemstones on the boulders faded away. The sets of armor dropped the uninhabited boulders and retreated behind E’s back once more.
“Your Gloriousness’ golemancy is inspiring to see as always. I remember when people used to make fun of you for abandoning the traditional path of a warrior,” Zappy said as he stared at the shining sets of armor.
“Becoming a warrior is too much work compared to being a golemancer. Why do anything when I can have my golems do it for me?” E asked and walked down the passage.
Zappy muttered, “All the wrong reasons,” as he followed after his king. Despite being inside of a mountain, the region was lit up as if it were outside. Shining gemstones on the ceiling and walls illuminated the twisting paths. E walked forward with confidence, not hesitating at any fork in the road.
Zappy asked, “Have you been here before, Your Gloriousness?”
“Never,” E said.
“I wasn’t aware golemancers had a spell to unravel a maze.”
E nodded. “They don’t.”
“Then … you do know the path, right?”
“Nope.”
“E….”
“Hmm?”
“Are we lost?”
E puffed his chest out. “A king is never lost for his kingdom follows him wherever he goes.”
“Oh, I didn’t know that. So this place is Konigreich the Second too? I can tell that to Tafel next time, right?” a voice asked from behind them.
A high-pitched voice answered with a giggle. “Right.”
E and Zappy whirled around. “Who are you!?” Zappy asked the half-naked man with a fairy sitting on his head.
Vur narrowed his eyes. “Were you the ones bullying my subjects?”
A few brown spots of light were floating beside Vur, chattering away.
“It was him!”
“And those armor sets.”
“The one in the suit is rude.”
“You’re the newest clan master?” E asked, raising an eyebrow. “And it wasn’t me who was bullying your subjects”—he pointed at Zappy—“it was him. You can have him if that’ll make you feel better.”
Vur nodded. “Then I’ll take him.”
“Y-Your Gloriousness!?” Zappy asked as earthen hands sprung out of the ground and seized the dwarf by his ankles. The earth beneath him split, and he was dragged down into the gaping fissure. A second later, the earth closed up again.
E grinned once Zappy disappeared. “So, isn’t it about time you answer my question? Are you the newest clan master of the Gemstone Merchants? What’s your name?”
“Yeah, I’m the new master,” Vur said with a nod. “I’m Vur.”
E’s grin broadened. “I like you a lot already. Let’s be friends.”
“Friends?” Vur asked and tilted his head. “You’re the first midget to pay tribute so far. I’ll be your friend, why not?”
“Wait!” Stella said. She leaned over Vur’s head and squinted at E. “What qualifications do you have to be Vur’s friend?” She crossed her arms over her chest. “You have to go through me first. I’m his agent.” She nodded her head twice.
E looked up at Stella then down at Vur. He took Vur’s silence as a sign of agreement. “My name is E. I’m the king of the dwarves,” he said, meeting Stella’s gaze. Disinterest painted her face. “That’s not enough?”
“What can you do?” Stella asked as she lay on her stomach, propping her face up with her palms.
“All the dwarves have to heed my orders,” E said, scratching his head. “And, I guess, I can summon golems?”
Stella’s cheeks puffed up. “What about elementals? Are you in charge of them too?”
“I’m called the dwarf king…, not the elemental king,” E said, his words causing Stella to sigh. “But the dwarves hold a higher position than elementals, so naturally elementals will heed my words.”
Stella rolled over onto her back and stared up at the cave’s ceiling. She sighed again. “I guess you pass…, barely. I’ve taken into account Vur’s lack of male friends, and it played the biggest role.”
E’s expression darkened, but it brightened again after he met eyes with Vur. “Why don’t we have a chat over a meal or drink? I brought a lot of good stuff in my car; let me go get it.”
“Car?” Vur asked.
“You don’t know what a car is?” E asked with a blink. “Well, that’s fine too. As your friend, I’ll get you the best model we have—it only has a 48% chance of exploding on use!”
As Vur led the way out of the earth elementals’ headquarters, Stella flew over and hovered beside E’s head. “Why did you want to be Vur’s friend?” she asked in a whisper and tilted her head in a manner similar to Vur. “All the other dwarves cursed at him when they first met him. I think he was about to drive the dwarves to extinction.”
E paled. “Can he really do that?” he whispered back, staring at Vur who had gone ahead since his strides were a lot longer.
Stella furrowed her brow and pouted. “Mm. Hmm. Mm.” She nodded. “If he doesn’t get distracted by something midway, then he could.”
E nodded in return. “I see. Well, to answer your question,” E said and stroked his chin. The stubble was like sandpaper rubbing against his fingers. “I come from a family of seers. Unlike other dwarves, we’re more appreciative of magic. And I probably inherited something from my parents, not futuresight, but a premonition of sorts. It’s really not confirmed, but whenever I have a hunch about something, it turns out to be true. Something on the inside yelled at me to become friends with Vur. The last time I felt that sensation, I listened to the voice and became king.”
Stella blinked at E. “A magical midget,” she muttered before flying back onto Vur’s head.
“You’re smaller than me,” E said before trotting after the duo. He grinned as he felt the burn in his legs. It had been a while since he had been so motivated. Ever since he became king, his premonition hadn’t told him to do anything, so he hadn’t. It was a shame about Zappy though.
“This is a car?” Vur asked when they arrived in front of E’s vehicle. “It looks like a normal carriage.”
“It’s a mass-produced model, which is why it looks so plain,” E said. “Some people really like decorating their cars, and they look a lot more impressive than this. I can show you some pictures.
” He walked to the front of the car and popped open the trunk by the driver’s seat. “Look.”
Vur stared at the brown, transparent roll in E’s hand. “What is it?”
“It’s a roll of film,” E said. “You don’t know what this is either?”
Vur took the film off of E’s palm and sniffed it before unrolling it. His eyes widened at the images burned into each little rectangle. “A mana picture?” he asked and poked the film. His finger pierced through it, and he tilted his head. “It’s not?”
“He’s not from around here,” Stella said and giggled at E’s baffled expression.
“Are you?” E asked.
“Yes! I was born here,” Stella said with a nod. She puffed her chest out. “I’m almost two months old.”
“So these are cars,” Vur said. The film was fully unraveled with parts of it lying on the ground. “I want one. A dragon-shaped one. It has to fly too.”
“A flying car?” E asked, raising an eyebrow. “There’s a lot of people trying to create one, but no one’s succeeded yet. I think Plumby was the closest; I’ll ask him for you.” He frowned. “Wait, his town was destroyed by a black dragon. I think it’ll be a while before he can do anything.”
“A black dragon?” Vur asked and shook his head. “Plumby shouldn’t have made him mad. He sounds stupid.”
E let out a wry smile. “Well, dragons are—”
“Oh! That reminds me,” Vur said. “You’re the king of the dwarves, right?”
“…That’s how I introduced myself, yes,” E said and furrowed his brow.
“I want to see your throne,” Vur said.
“My throne?” E asked. “It’s just a normal throne though, but if that’s what you want, we can drive over there right now.”
“Okay,” Vur said with a nod. “Let’s do it before I forget.” He handed the unraveled film back to E before hopping into the car.
When E finished rolling the film back up and placed it into his trunk, he found Vur ripping apart the lower section of his pants with Stella’s help. “What are you doing?” E asked as Vur nodded at the strip he tore off. “Do you have a problem with your pants?”
“No,” Vur said. “I’m making a flag.”
“A flag. I see,” E said and scratched his nose. He snapped his fingers and a set of armor materialized in the driver’s seat. E sat beside Vur, and the car lurched forward. But what does he need a flag for?
***
Alice stirred her tea and dropped in a cube of sugar before taking a sip out of the steaming cup. She sighed as she stood up and walked out of her office, holding her cup and a stack of papers. The party had finally ended, but she still had to take care of some paperwork that Henry had saved up for her. Tafel didn’t mind waiting and had been hanging out with the skeletons.
A strange ripping sound drew Alice’s attention, and she followed the noise to one of the storage rooms in the adventurers’ guild. Mr. Skelly was tearing large swaths of cloth into smaller pieces while other skeletons were stitching them onto larger, rectangular pieces.
“Sewing skeletons,” Alice said and shook her head before taking a sip of her tea. Mr. Skelly raised his head and smiled at the guild master before handing off the cloth in his hand to an old lady, whom Alice recognized as the town’s oldest seamstress. “What are you making?”
“Flags,” Mr. Skelly said. “Did you need anything, guild master? Your hair is awfully lustrous today. You’ll have to tell me the secret to keeping it so healthy.”
Alice snorted. “Don’t try to flatter me, you hairless being.” She frowned at the grinning skull with a golden halo depicted on the flags by the skeletons. “What are you making flags for? Are you planning on sailing?”
“Sailing? No,” Mr. Skelly said. “We’re here to plant them. See?” He pointed outside the window, causing the guild master to follow his finger with her gaze. A large flag was waving in the wind above the tallest building in Anfang.
Alice tilted her head before taking another sip of tea. “Why?”
“You don’t know what planting a flag means?” Mr. Skelly asked while blinking.
“We don’t have any flag-planting customs here,” Alice said, ignoring the fact that Mr. Skelly didn’t have any eyelids to blink with.
“Oh,” Mr. Skelly said and rubbed his chin. “Well, it means—”
“Tell me the truth,” Alice said and kicked his shin, causing a crack to appear on the skeleton’s bones. “I always feel like you’re lying when you rub your chin like that.”
Mr. Skelly cackled. “Alright, the truth then,” he said. “On our continent, you identify someone’s territory by their flag.”
Alice waited for more, but Mr. Skelly kept his mouth shut. She knit her brow as the skeleton’s words sunk in. “So what you’re saying is … Anfang is your territory?” Her eyes narrowed at the grinning skeleton.
“Precisely,” Mr. Skelly said with a nod. “You’re an awfully smart individual; won’t you reconsider joining us?”
Alice smacked Mr. Skelly’s head with her shield. His skull detached from his neck and rolled across the room just as Tafel appeared beside Alice. The demon blinked at the rolling skull and glanced at the guild master. “Violent much?” Tafel asked, raising an eyebrow. “I thought you said you’d try to get along with them.”
Mr. Skelly’s headless body nodded by bending at the chest. “Right?” Mr. Skelly asked. “I was even extending an olive branch to her.”
Tafel blinked at Mr. Skelly. “You can speak without your head?”
“Of course,” Mr. Skelly said. “Skulls are a formality when you’re dead. We don’t have vocal cords. Regardless of whether or not our heads are attached, we shouldn’t be able to speak anyways, right?”
Tafel scratched her head. “I never thought about it that way,” she said. Her gaze shifted onto the flags on the ground. “Flags of Damnedism? Really?”
“It’d be wrong not to spread the glory of our mistress since we’re already here,” Mr. Skelly said as he retrieved his skull from the child by his side. The seamstress’ grandchild had chased after the skull when it started rolling.
“Why are you claiming Anfang as your territory?” Alice asked, placing one hand on her hip while the other held her teacup. “It belongs to me.” She nodded. “And the mayor, but he doesn’t count.”
“Does it really belong to you?” Mr. Skelly asked, twisting his skull back into place.
“Yes! I’m the guild master,” Alice said. “I was entrusted by the king to protect and maintain order in this place. Everyone knows the guild masters own their towns.”
“Well,” Mr. Skelly said, drawing out the word. “Then where’s your flag?”
Alice glared at the skeleton. “Like I said,” she said through gritted teeth, “we don’t have flag-planting customs here.”
“Then just pretend you still own the territory,” Mr. Skelly said with a nod. “It shouldn’t matter if I plant our flag here.”
“Pretend? I still do own Anfang!” Alice shouted. “Keep pushing your luck and I’ll really destroy you!”
Mr. Skelly gasped and clutched his chest. He lowered his head and glanced at Tafel through a sidelong gaze. He sighed and asked, “Why…, why is she so mean to us?”
“Don’t act like an abandoned puppy!” Alice said and smacked Mr. Skelly’s skull off for the second time. The seamstress’ grandchild tottered after it again.
Mr. Skelly made a sighing noise. “Alice,” he said. “Have you ever considered that you might be a bad person?”
“I’m the bad one!?” Alice asked, her eye twitching. “You’re the skeleton!”
“Yes, I’m a skeleton,” Mr. Skelly said. “But that doesn’t mean anything. Are skeletons inherently evil? If we abide by the laws and help people in need, are we still bad people? There’s no rule saying skeletons can’t be good people, just like there’s no rules saying living people can’t be bad people. I’m sure you met many unjust living beings throughout your life despite being so young.�
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Alice frowned. “I—”
“Look at what you’ve done,” Mr. Skelly said. “Instead of assessing the situation before acting, you immediately tried to kill me at the party. You’ve shamed our religion and made it out to be evil despite the fact our believers contributed the most to the rebuilding of Anfang. You refuse to let us spread our culture, and, most importantly, you’ve knocked my head off twice now. If I were a living person, I would’ve died, you know?”
“If spreading your culture involves claiming my town as your territory, then I’ll knock your head off as many times as it takes to get you to stop,” Alice said and placed her empty teacup down. She snorted. “Maybe I’m a bad person. So what? If you don’t like it, you can leave.”
Mr. Skelly shrugged. “Well, as long as you realize it,” he said. He turned around and retrieved his skull from the child while muttering, “Just what do I have to do to make her pity us?”
“Try adopting some baby gryphons,” Tafel said.
“Will that work?” Mr. Skelly asked, turning his gaze onto Alice.
“N—Yes,” Alice said. She bit her lower lip and clenched her hands. “The next time I see Stella…. Oh boy.”
17
“So fancy,” Stella said as she flitted through the air. She flew to the ceiling of the room and poked a crystalline chandelier before stealing one of its crystals. After flying back down to Vur, she stored the crystal inside his bag before taking her place on his head.
“I’m glad you like my palace décor enough to steal things from it,” E said and glanced at the chandelier. It wasn’t his anyways. Zappy would probably have been outraged, but he wasn’t here to say anything. When E had asked about his assistant on the way back, Vur had told him Zappy was only imprisoned. “Are you sure you don’t want anything to eat?”
“Throne first,” Vur said with a nod. He was carrying a makeshift flag in his right hand, the flagstick propped up against his shoulder while the leather rectangle was draped against his back.
“If you insist,” E said and scratched his head. “It’s a bit unkempt; I hope you don’t mind the mess.”
