by Lindsay Becs
Holy. Shit.
I just asked Bex to marry me, and I have nothing to give her. I didn’t think this through. I didn’t plan it. Hell, I hadn’t really thought about it at all until the words came out of my mouth. What is wrong with me that I keep doing that?
My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest, it’s pounding so hard. My palms are beginning to sweat, and soon it’ll be dripping down my face if she doesn’t put me out of my misery and give me an answer. It’ll gut me if she says no, yet if she says yes, I think I’ll be just as nervous. This is huge, and I’m cocking it up with my impulsive mouth. Again.
What is it about her that makes me blurt out these life-changing decisions without thinking them through first? Oh, that’s right, she’s Bexley Morgan, the most amazing woman that’s ever graced the earth, and she seems to like me for whatever fucked-up reason. So, I’ll just keep spewing things from my mouth that I have no business doing and pray that she still wants me around.
Reading her letter from my mom, not just to the future woman I’d love but to Bexley, I knew it. There was no doubt she was the woman I wanted, needed, by my side for the rest of my life. And as much as I’m freaking out waiting for her to answer me, I know that this is right.
She’s still sitting here on my lap, wrapped in a blanket, staring at me in silence. I can feel the wheels turning in her mind over what I just asked. So I open my mouth again.
“Bexley, I know this is fast. I know that we both never thought we’d be here with anyone, and definitely not with each other after that supposed one-night stand.” I wink at her for effect, getting her to smile. “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I didn’t have this planned or thought out. I don’t even have a ring to give you. But what I do know is that I love you. This,” I say, putting my hand on her heart, “between us is right. I have no doubts about that.” Then something hits me. “Wait!”
I set her down on the couch and run to my closet, where I retrieve the box of letters from my mom. I thumb through the envelopes until I get to the one I was looking for. You Found the One: Read This First. I tear the envelope open and out falls my mom’s ring. I smile as I feel tears fill my eyes. Tilting my head back, I close my eyes and smile up at my mom in heaven for saving me still. When I open my eyes, I look down at the letter still folded in my hands and open it to read, but pause because I want to read it with Bex. I walk back to her and pull her back into my lap, where she searches me for what crazy thing I’m going to do next.
“I forgot to read my letter. I jumped the gun,” I laugh. “I seem to do that a lot lately.”
She looks down and reads the title of the letter in my hand. “Did you read it?”
“I want you to read it to me.”
“Ollie…”
“Please?”
She takes the paper, opening it up, and clears her throat before beginning.
My baby boy,
I guess I can’t really call you that anymore, huh? You are an incredible man, Ollie. I may not be there to see the man you’ve become, but I know that you are amazing. And now not just as a man, but as a future husband.
You’ve found the one, have you? I’m so happy for you, Oliver. I’ve said a prayer for years for whomever this woman is, that she would be someone who was your equal, your opposite, your hope for the future, your soulmate, and the love of your life. If you’re ready to ask her to be your wife, then I know that she is.
I’d be honored if you’d give her my ring to wear. This is the ring that Travis gave me, not your dad, because Travis was all of those things for me and so much more. I pray that you have the same type of love we had. A love that is only yours and that you are willing to walk through fire for. Love her with your whole heart, Ollie, always.
I love you,
Mom
I hear Bex sniff as she wipes her eyes. I drop down to my knees in front of her, holding the ring in my fingers. I look up into her green eyes and ask.
“Bexley, Bex, Leppy, Sweetness, you’re my best friend and the love of my life. I promise I’ll walk through fire for you over and over again if you’d be my wife. Marry me?”
She laughs a cry out as she cups my face and kisses my lips. I can taste her salty tears as she says, “Yes.”
I press my lips into her more, needing to feel her closer. My tongue swipes into her mouth, feeling her answer to be my wife in our kiss. I rain kisses all over her face before sitting back and taking her hand and sliding the ring onto her finger.
“This is crazy, isn’t it?” I laugh, looking at her hand before glancing up and seeing how she’s smiling at the ring on her finger. Her dimple showing tells me how happy she is. I cup her cheek saying, “I love you.”
Her eyes meet mine then, still shining with tears. “I love you so much, Ollie.” She kisses me, then pulls apart and smiles. “Holy hell, we’re getting married?” she laughs. “We’re getting married!” she yells, making me laugh with her before I kiss her more. Because it’s never enough and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my days with her.
I can’t believe I’m getting married. Hell, I can’t believe she said yes. Now, as I drive to my best friend’s house to tell him and my sisters, I have a sense of nothing but happiness around me. Bex is next to me, holding my hand as we drive to Graves. It’s snowing, which only makes it feel like one more nod of approval from my mom where she’s watching from above. I smile, pulling Bex’s hand to my lips and kissing it.
“I feel nervous,” she admits when we pull into Travis’s driveway.
“You have nothing to be nervous about, sweetness.”
“Do you think he’ll be upset about me wearing her ring?” she asks, looking at the ring sitting on her finger.
“Honestly, I think it might affect him for a minute, but I’m sure he knew what she wanted. And if he didn’t, it wouldn’t be like he’d go against anything she wanted. Ever,” I add with a laugh. “Let’s go tell them.” I wink before releasing her hand and exiting the car.
We knock on the door, because although we’re family, this isn’t my house. It’s his fresh start with Penny, who I can hear yelling from inside. “They’re here!” The door flies open with her squeal of excitement before she throws herself into my arms, forcing me to let go of Bex’s hand.
“Hello to you, too,” I tell Penny, picking her up in a hug. She wraps her arms and legs around me and squeezes tight.
“I missed you,” she whispers into my ear.
“How’s my girl?” I ask her as she stays wrapped around me and we walk inside.
“Great now! Everyone is here!”
“Tate is here already?”
“Yep! She came last night, and we stayed up late playing Uno and she made dirt pudding.”
“I can see that,” I say, noting the chocolate ring around her mouth.
Travis and Tatum are sitting in the family room when we walk in. They both look good, happy, and it’s been a while since we all looked that way at the same time. The grin on my face grows as I put Penny down and she jumps into Travis’s lap. He grunts out a wince that makes me laugh as he gives me the finger from behind Penny’s back, making my laugh grow into a full belly laugh.
I pull Bex into my side as we stand in the room with the only other people I care about as much as her. My family. They’re all in this room with me.
“Before this day goes on any further, I have something to tell you guys,” I say, looking down at Bex. “We were due a visit, yes, but it’s more than that.” I huff out a breath.
“Spit it out, lizard brains,” Tatum says with a smirk. The little shit is onto me.
I look over to Travis, who has a matching smirk. He knows; he’s been here before.
“Tell us! Tell us, lizard brains!” Penny yells as she bounces on her knees on the couch. I shoot Tatum a look, but she just lifts her brow, telling me to get on with it.
I look back to Bex, who’s still hugging my side but watching me with an adoring smile, showing off her dimple.
“We’re getting married,” I say, keeping my eyes on only hers for a second before I look up to scan my family’s faces again.
“I told you, Tatum! You owe me twenty bucks! Ha!” Travis says as he stands with a finger in her face.
She rolls her eyes and then looks to us. “Thanks a lot, guys,” she deadpans before adding, “but congratulations.”
“Wow, how heartfelt, Tate,” I tell her, shaking my head.
“Let me see what kind of gumball machine ring he got you,” Tatum says to Bexley, who stiffens under my arm.
“So, here’s the thing,” I start as I run a hand through my hair. “I gave her mom’s ring.” Tatum’s mouth falls open, then snaps shut as she sits back in her chair.
Before I can say anything more, Bexley has her hand out in front of her cupped by her other hand like it’s the most precious thing in the world. “Travis, I hope you don’t mind.” She gives him a soft smile. “It’s so beautiful.”
His eyes go to her hand, color draining from his face as his brows furrow. I can see the memories running through his head, good and bad, happy and sad, as he looks at the ring that once resided on the finger of the love of his life.
“Shit, that was unexpected,” Tatum says.
“Swear jar!” Penny yells at her.
“This is why I don’t visit much. I go broke every time I’m here,” Tatum complains, trying to take the focus off of us.
“Daddy? Are you OK?” Penny asks as she looks at Travis.
He clears his throat and inhales deeply while blinking through his fog. “Yeah, LP, I’m good.” He smiles up at Bex and me. “Congratulations.” He rises, coming to stand in front of us. He wraps an arm around me, pulling me into a big hug. “I’m happy for you. Really. Love her with your whole heart, bro,” he says into my ear. We pull apart and he grins at me.
“Always,” I say back to him.
He clears his throat again, trying to hold back all of his emotions I’m sure, before looking to Bex. He smiles at her, a little bigger than he gave me, and I almost get jealous of it. “Welcome to our crazy family that no one understands but us,” Travis says as he pulls her into a hug. Their hug is quick, but he takes her hand and looks at the ring that he once gave to my mom, his wife.
“Travis…” Bex starts, but he cuts her off.
“She told me that she wanted you to have it, Ollie. I assumed you had it when she wasn’t wearing it when she died, but it felt weird not to know where it was all this time.” He sniffs, still staring at it. “I’m glad I know where it is now. I’m happy that it’s you wearing it, Bex.” He looks up at her then. “She’d be so happy seeing you two together. I know this ring is where it belongs now. Take care of each other.” He lets go of her hand and walks out of the room, leaving us all there in silence.
“That was Momma’s ring?” Penny asks confused.
I kneel down in front of her, still sitting on the couch. “Yes,” I nod. “When a man loves a woman and asks her to marry him, he gives her a ring to show how much he loves her. That ring is the one that your dad gave to Mom to show her how much he loved her. Momma left her ring to me in one of her letters. She wanted me to give it to the woman I loved to help pass that love along. Do you understand?”
“I think so. Can I see it?” she asks with big, hopeful eyes.
“Of course, you can,” Bex says, kneeling beside me. “Do you want to try it on?”
I smile at this amazing woman beside me and how she’s so good and understanding with not only me, but my family and all of our still-healing broken hearts.
Penny’s face lights up when she slides the ring on her finger. “Daddy had lots of love for Momma,” she states.
“I sure did, LP. Still do,” Travis says from the back of the room.
After we all got over the emotions and the congratulations that came with it, the rest of the day was filled with jokes, stories of our childhoods, and lots of laughter. And all of it was with a side of dirt pudding, of course.
Chapter 18
Bexley
I wake up in an empty bed in the guest room of Travis’s house to laughter and growls from outside. I smile to myself, enjoying the sounds of happiness and innocence of a child. I missed that in my own childhood, so hearing it soothes my soul.
Walking to the window, I peek out of the blinds and watch Ollie get hit in the chest with a snowball from Penny. His looks up at her with a look of shock before he takes off after her. She screams, attempting to run away, but he catches her. He grabs a handful of snow and smashes it in her face. My hand covers my mouth to hold in my own laughter of surprise that he did that to her. She doesn’t seem to mind, though, as she giggles more and falls limp to the ground.
I pull on a sweater and sleep pants and make my way out to the kitchen. “She’s going to be an ice cube,” Travis laughs as he shakes his head, watching his best friend with his daughter.
“Yep. A melting ice cube,” Tatum adds as she turns to pour more coffee into her cup. She sees me and greets me with a small grin. “Morning.”
“Morning. Looks like I missed all the fun. How long have they been out there?” I ask as I take the cup of coffee Tatum holds out for me.
“An hour already. They have to be dying down soon,” Tatum answers. “Ollie didn’t want to wake you. There’s a plate of French toast in the microwave for you.”
“Oh. Thank you. I really did miss everything,” I laugh. “You all must get up super early.”
“Penny is always up with the sun,” Travis says, still watching them play outside.
I look at the clock and see it’s already 9:30. Guess he’s right. I didn’t think I slept that late, but they’ve already been up for hours. I heat up the breakfast that I love and eat while watching the man I love play with his little sister in the snow. How did this become my life? I still feel like I’m dreaming.
Just as I finish eating, Penny and Ollie come inside wet, cold, and covered in snow with red cheeks and noses. Travis helps Penny strip down and shoos her off to take a bath that Tatum already has running to warm her up.
“Will you help strip me down, too, big boy?” I hear Ollie ask Travis in a girlie voice.
“Arms up, you handsome slab of beef,” Travis answers and pulls his shirt up enough to get stuck around his face because it’s wet. Travis slaps his stomach and walks away. “I prefer my meat a bit… hotter. You’re a little too rare for me.”
I laugh into my coffee so hard, I make myself choke, causing coffee to drip out my nose. Just for the record, that burns like a sonofabitch.
“Bex? You alright? Is she choking? Do you need the Heimlich? Somebody help her! I’m stuck inside my shirt!” Ollie yells as he struggles to get his shirt off, but only manages to get the neckline stuck in his mouth with his arms almost pinned behind his head. The whole thing only makes me laugh and cough more.
“I’m fine,” I croak out, taking a sip of water that Travis hands me with a smirk on his face.
Travis leans his hip against the counter and watches in pure entertainment as his friend struggles with the confines of cotton that I’m sure are going to be ripped soon. This whole scenario is so strange to watch. Yet, I can’t look away or seem to move to help Ollie. It’s like seeing a glimpse into their younger years as two ornery boys reign mayhem down on one another.
After watching Ollie struggle for a few more minutes, looking like a caterpillar trying to get out of its cocoon while doing the YMCA and The Floss at the same time, I hear the fabric begin to tear. I cover my mouth to hide my laugh as I finally go to help him. My hands touch his sides and he jumps, then calms down. I slide the neck of the shirt up and over his head, keeping his arms still stuck. He looks at me, and I smile as I whisper, “We haven’t tried this yet.” I kiss his lips in a quick peck and then pull the shirt the rest of the way off him.
Ollie, now free of his shirt and breathing heavily, stands there staring at me, then looks over to Travis, who’s still there smirking at him. “You know,” Ollie starts, “it used
to be you and Mom against me. Now, it’s you two against me, and it’s not fair. But just you wait, because once Penny is older, it’s on.” He winks at me as he walks out, heading up to take a shower, I’m sure.
“Should I be worried?” I ask as I turn to face Travis.
“Nah, he’s all bark but no bite,” he replies, sitting down at the table.
“Hey,” I say as I sit down across from him, “thank you for being supportive of us.”
“You don’t have to thank me for that. I love Ollie as a brother, not really the son I say he is. You guys are family.”
“Yeah. I…I just don’t know how that is. I never really had a family.”
He watches me, nodding his head before he responds. “I didn’t either. Josie, Ollie, Tatum. They’ve been my family for as long as I can remember. They’re the good ones.”
“I’m seeing that. And so are you, Travis.”
“I hope so. I just want to do right by her, you know?” he asks, and I know he means Josie.
“I think you’re doing just fine,” I smile at him. “Also, I really am honored to wear her ring, but if it’s too hard or you’d like it back to give to Penny one day, I understand. It was yours first.”
“No. It’s yours now. It was mine to give to her, and she wanted you to have it. Not gonna lie, it took me a minute to get myself together last night when I saw it, but I’m glad it’s staying in the family.”
“Thank you. It’s really beautiful,” I tell him as we both stare at the ring on my finger.
“I knew that was hers the second I saw it. The blue sapphire is the same blue as her eyes,” he smiles, lost in his love for her.
“It’s the same as Ollie’s,” I say, realizing he’s right. It’s their eyes.
“They all have her eyes—Ollie, Tate, Penny—they all have the same deep blue eyes as her. I see her every time I look at my LP.”
“That’s such an amazing gift to have.”
He’s quiet, contemplating for a moment before he says, “In the beginning, it didn’t always feel that way, but now it does.”
