by Ann Wilson
hoped to die before this became necessary." Joste lookeddown at his burden, troubled by the man's sudden change. "He resistedme with all his will, yet now he clings to me for comfort, as a newbornclings to its mother. He seems not to know me any longer, perhaps notto know himself."
"As one who has lost all memory?" the older guard asked.
"I think . . . not lost," Joste said slowly. "He told me he knew whathe was doing, and I believe him."
"What, then?"
"I cannot be sure yet . . . but he fought me as well as he was able,though he must have known he had no way to win, and I denied him theescape of death. Had he lacked honor as I thought, he would havespoken in an effort to live--but he did not." Joste hesitated. He hadunderestimated the man; perhaps Marguerre had spoken the truth earlier.Perhaps he had truly felt no dishonor in leading females into combat--athing that was difficult to believe, but so was his sudden change froma defiant Marine to a sobbing . . . what? "Not lost," Joste repeatedthoughtfully. "Far worse, if what I begin to suspect is true. Itwould appear that he destroyed his mind rather than betray his people."
"Not even a human would go that far!" Sedni exclaimed, his voiceshaken.
"I would prefer a more acceptable idea myself," Joste said. Death cameto everyone, soon or late; in the long run, it was unavoidable, and attimes a self-inflicted death was the only way to preserve honor--farpreferable to the alternative of living dishonored. The idea ofsomeone destroying his own mind, though--even for the same purpose--wasone that made the Traiti interrogator recoil. Still, at this point itwas only a possibility, not a certainty. Joste glanced at the humanagain, then began giving orders. "Chorvak, call the hospital and tellthem I'm bringing in an emergency patient. And find out if either ofthe females survived and is able to talk. Sedni, go to Communicationsand have them stand by for a possible priority call to N'chark clanhomeon Norvis. I may need to talk to Ka'ruchaya Jarna."
Both saluted, and Sedni left while Chorvak went to Joste's desk to makethe call. The interrogator left as well, carrying the sleeping human.
Within minutes he had covered the short distance to the hospital andwas putting the mangled man on an emergency surgical table. Marguerreseemed to partially awaken when Joste put him down, whimpering softlyuntil the duty surgeon gave him a sedative.
"What's wrong with him?" the surgeon asked. "Aside from the obvious, Imean."
"I am not certain," Joste told him. "I am not even sure I really wantto know, but I must check. Give him support treatment until I can,please."
* * * * *
Chorvak was waiting when Joste left the surgery. "The tinydark-skinned female is dead, Group-Leader," he reported, "but the biggerpale one's injuries were less serious than the physicians originallythought; she is alive and regaining consciousness. They will allow youto speak to her as long as you keep it brief and do not excite her."
"Thank you, Chorvak. I will be careful."
The hospital was small, so it didn't take long for the two to get tothe room assigned to the human woman. Joste went in alone, took a seatby her bed. "Ka'naya Marine, may I with you speak?"
"Uh?" She looked at him, clearly still groggy and trying to focus."Wha' 'bout?"
Joste puzzled over that momentarily, then he figured out the slurredwords. "About Major Horst Marguerre, ka'naya. When I was himquestioning, he something said that did not English seem, a code ofsome sort, I think. Then he cried out, and like a youngling wept. Canyou me tell, what to him happened?"
She seemed to rouse at Marguerre's name. "Something not English? Buthe doesn't know any other language--" Then her eyes widened, and shelooked sick. "Blood . . . is it his?"
Joste's silence answered her. Tears leaked out of her eyes and sheswore tiredly. "Damn you, you bastard Shark. What'd you do to breakhim?"
"Ask me that not, ka'naya. The answer would only you distress, and heis help now getting. But I must know, when he those strange wordssaid, what he by them meant. What they to him did."
"Maybe I'd rather not know, at that." She scowled. "What'll you do tohim if I tell you?"
"If it what I fear is, I will my Ka'ruchaya--you have not the term,female parent to the clan--ask, him to adopt. N'chark will for himcare."
"Clan mother. But he's human--why would you do that?"
"He something to himself did, that him into the likeness of a younglingturned. If that likeness a true one is, then he must a youngling'ssafety and guidance given be." He paused for a moment. "And it myopinion is, that what he did was from honor done."
"It was. I'm not sure I believe you, but telling you what happenedcan't make it any worse for him. Okay, you're right. The wordsthemselves're meaningless, they were only triggers for anti-interrogationconditioning, a total mind-wipe. Didn't bother anythingelse, like intelligence, just memory. It's a new technique, but a lotof us already have it . . ." She turned her head away briefly, thenwent on. "You could say he has the mind of a newborn child in an adultbody. Who was the first person he saw after he . . . blanked out?"
"He has no one seen."
"I can guess why." She grimaced. "Damn. Okay, who was the first onehe heard? If he can still hear."
"He can, ka'naya. And I the first was."
She gave him a mocking grin. "Hi, Daddy. If the psychs were right,he's fixated on you, now. How do you feel about taking care ofbabies?"
In spite of the dismay he felt at her confirmation of his worstsuspicion, Joste couldn't help a smile. "Ka'naya Marine, I have onlyonce the joy had, of sharing young. Say you he will truly me ases'chaya see? Male parent?"
"Father?" The Marine's grin softened into an answering smile at hisobvious sincerity. "Not exactly. That, yes, but more. He's yourchild--yours alone--unless he heard someone else about the same time heheard you."
"There no one was, ka'naya. He in my arms asleep was, before anotherspoke. I your leave to go must ask; I should Ka'ruchaya Jarna call."
She looked worried. "Okay, I guess you will take care of MajorMarguerre. But what'll happen to me? So far I've been treated allright, but I'm afraid that won't--"
"Ka'naya!" Joste interrupted, horrified by what she was implying. "Youneed nothing fear. You will guarded be, of course, but no harm will toyou come! We not like humans twisted are, a female to hurt withoutgreat need."
As her expression began to show relief, Joste gave her a courteoussalute and left for the Communications section. Sedni wasn't the onlyone waiting there for him; so was his commander, Senior Group-LeaderKunnos.
"Sedni briefed me," Kunnos said. "May I listen to your call?"
"Of course, Group-Leader." It wasn't usually 'of course,' but Jostehad served under Kunnos for a long time, long enough to trust hisdiscretion even in N'chark's clan matters.
Clan priority traffic got the same treatment as militarycommunications, so it didn't take long for the operator to makeultrawave contact with N'chark clanhome, then leave to join Sedni. Nordid it take long, once contact was made, for Ka'ruchaya Jarna to appearon the comscreen. Joste greeted her formally, crossing arms over hischest and inclining his head. Kunnos followed suit, bowing more deeplyas befit an out-clan male.
Jarna acknowledged the greeting, then looked curiously at Joste."Ruesten, you have won the Honor scars; what problem can you have soserious that it requires my intervention?"
"Ka'ruchaya, it is a matter of adoption."
"Ah, I see. Go on."
Joste did as he was told, describing the human's torment, memory loss,and what the female Marine had told him. "Maybe he was being honestwhen he said the females volunteered for combat. Certainly the one Ispoke to showed pain at his hurt. And he did prove himself honorable,sacrificing his mind--himself--as he did. Ka'ruchaya, he needs help,and I think that once he learns our ways, he will be a credit toN'chark."
"He lost only his memory?"
"Yes, Ka'ruchaya, according to the female Marine."
"And she called him your 'child,' your e
sten." Jarna paused, thinking."No, Cor'naya Joste. Under the circumstances, I do not think adoptioneither possible or necessary; he cannot take the blood-oath if hecannot understand it. He is a Terran, and apparently newborn by theirways, regarding you as chaya. I accept him as es'ruesten, a clan-sonof N'chark by birth. Care for him, see that he gets the medical helphe
