She appreciated the sentiment.
Just couldn’t accept it. Because Anne was stronger than Erynn. And Erynn couldn’t love like that, not if it meant getting hurt again.
She said nothing, hurried out the door to the waiting car and didn’t look back. Prepared to get away from this house permanently for the second time in her life.
They had only been driving for a few minutes when Noah spoke. “About your mom...”
“I don’t want to talk about her.”
“But don’t you see? It’s why you push me away, too—the fact that your dad died. Because you do the same to her.” His tone was sincere, even if he fumbled over his words.
But Erynn felt like he might as well have taken a cannon to the walls of her emotional fortress and she resented it. She felt her shoulders stiffen, any positivity toward him vanish.
“Don’t, Noah.”
“Listen, it’s something we can work through.”
Work through. Like she was a puzzle. Just like she had been as a teenager when people overgeneralized about “those kids” and tried to figure out how to ensure she and her friends didn’t end up like some other kids in foster care. There had been people who cared. She couldn’t deny that her parents had been in that category. But there were some people who viewed them as projects—or worse, in Erynn’s mind, as a “ministry.” Did they not understand how insulting that could feel, to be that to someone? And here she was, a full-grown adult, and someone wanted to make her a project again.
Only this time it was someone whose opinion she cared about. Somehow that made it hurt all the more.
“You don’t understand, you won’t understand, and I don’t appreciate you sitting around analyzing me like I’m a latent print under a magnifying glass.”
“I’m not, I’m just—”
“You’re just trying to figure out something you could never imagine, Noah. With your perfect family, and parents who loved you, siblings who still talk—did you know I have siblings? Biological siblings? Yeah, who knows where they are. I doubt they care where I am, either. I’ll probably never know. You could not understand what my life was like, or how my mind works now.” Erynn started to shake, took a deep breath and made herself finish, the words grinding out between her teeth. “And I’d appreciate it if you would stop trying.”
He said nothing, just drove.
Finally. She’d finally managed after all these years to push him far enough away that she was safe from her feelings for him, knowing she’d likely just destroyed any he’d had for her.
SIXTEEN
Miles stretched on in uncomfortable silence and it was making Noah feel almost physical prickles of discomfort against his skin, like a shirt that rubbed wrong. His friendship with Erynn had never been like this, and it felt anything but natural now. So he’d pushed too hard, he could see that, but had it been necessary for her to shove back with quite that much certainty? He didn’t think so.
Still, they needed to work together. Because he could do that, right? Forget that she was the woman he loved, and just be professional? Sure, he’d done it for the last few years. But that was before this case. Before it had felt for a minute like the last of Erynn’s emotional walls had tumbled down. Before they’d kissed.
He could still feel the pressure of her lips against his, if he let himself think about it.
But for now he wouldn’t. Couldn’t. He was driving toward Anchorage like they’d planned, and he knew Erynn knew where she wanted to go, but he didn’t.
“So what did the words say? Could she tell?”
“Holloway House.”
The group home where she’d lived before coming to be with the Coopers. “You mentioned that place to me earlier, right?” He wanted to make sure he’d remembered correctly.
Erynn nodded. “We all—those of us the Foster Kid Killer has killed, and me—lived there at the same time, along with two other kids.”
“Did anything happen to them?”
“No. But one of them moved out before the rest of us did, and another one, Rachel, would leave relatively often for sleepovers with a friend from school. She wasn’t there the night the house caught fire.”
“So it’s that specific? Not just those of you who were foster kids in the house, but those who were living there at the time of a fire?” No wonder they’d had a difficult time figuring out the connection between the foster kids. How Erynn had come to that conclusion, he didn’t understand but was willing to accept that it might just be one of those things that had come to her and made sense at the time.
Because God had brought her to the answer? Maybe. There had been too many instances in this case where he’d seen God working for him to discount the possibility.
“So now we’re looking at everyone who was there that night,” Erynn added.
“Staff?”
“I don’t know why staff would only target the group that was there for the fire, but, yes, we shouldn’t rule them out. But mainly emergency personnel who were there that night.”
Noah thought the idea had merit, but how were they going to figure out who was present on the night of an incident that had taken place over a decade before? If police had realized the connection at the time, maybe records of who was there that night could have been preserved. Had they known?
“Were there any more pages of your dad’s notes?” he asked Erynn. “You still haven’t told me what those said.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot. Just ideas for how we were connected, a list of the people he wanted to check out.”
“Names?”
He saw Erynn shake her head out of the corner of his eye. “No names, just professions. EMTs, Dispatch, law enforcement, firemen, social workers.”
“So we don’t know if he made the connection to the night of the fire at Holloway House, but he was on the right track.”
“Since this is why he was killed, I think he was more than on the right track—he just didn’t leave us any solid proof of that, or write anything definitive down.”
“So do we go by the Anchorage Police Department first, see if they’ve got records of that call and who responded? Their dispatch would have handled it, but I doubt records go back that far.”
“Yes, I want to go there.” She looked away from him, looked back out the window, and he felt the distance building between them again. She’d dropped her guard, just for a minute, when they were discussing the case, but she’d caught her mistake and corrected it.
The drive to the Anchorage Police Department wasn’t bad and they were there in less than half an hour. Noah pulled into the parking lot and looked over at Erynn.
She nodded in his direction. “I know, you get to take the lead.”
That wasn’t what he’d been thinking at all. He’d actually been just trying to absorb the sudden break in the case, had been wondering if they were finally closing in on whoever had been behind all of this.
Wondering if Erynn would change her mind about the two of them when things settled down.
All things he needed to mentally work through another time, because right now he needed to focus.
“I’ll take the lead since you’re not officially on the case but, Erynn, don’t forget we’ve gotten this far because of you. You’re extraordinarily good at what you do.”
She nodded once, stepped out of the car and left him scrambling to follow. They made it inside the police department without incident, and Noah spoke to the woman working the front desk.
“Is Officer Reed in?” He should have had Erynn text his brother-in-law from the car, but he hadn’t remembered he had a personal connection to the department until about the time he’d pulled into the parking lot.
“He is. Could I get your name? Then I’ll get him up here for you.”
Micah Reed walked into the lobby not five minutes later, grinning. “Noah, hey! I s
hould have known you’d be up here eventually. The Ice Maiden case, right?” He looked from Noah to Erynn. “How’s that going?”
Noah didn’t even know how to answer that. So he just cut to the chase. “We’ve realized it has some connections to another case APD worked years ago, the Foster Kid Killer. Long story short, we’ve found what connected the victims in that case and we’re close to a suspect, but we need some help.”
“Let’s head over to Records.” Micah’s face had lost the grin and taken on a focused look. Noah could see why the guy was such a good match for his sister Kate. She had this same ferociously focused work mode, although for years she’d used it in Search and Rescue.
“Here we are. This is Lisa, she’s one of our records technicians, and she can help us find what you’re looking for, assuming the files were digitized by the year you’re looking for.”
Twenty minutes later, they had a list of names written on a yellow legal pad. The sheet torn off, they were ready to make a plan.
Responding Officers: Danny Howard, Mack Cooper, Rich Evans
Firefighters: Station 6 Night Crew
Paramedics: Annaliese Watkins, Devin Wyatt
“Where do you want to start?” Noah asked Erynn when they were back in his car. His heart was pounding, his palms were sweaty and he had that end-of-the-tunnel feeling that this part of a case always gave him. They were close, and he knew it, could feel it, but he had no guarantees they’d make it out of whatever happened next alive. He wanted those guarantees, would have given a great deal for them, but as it was, life didn’t work that way. All he could do was hope. And pray.
And listen to Erynn, whose input had proved so valuable over the years.
“It’s going to take some work to figure out exactly who was on the Station 6 Night Crew all those years ago, so let’s save the firefighters for last.”
“We know two of the responding officers. So we need to check out Rich Evans and the EMTs?”
“Yes.”
“Who first?”
Noah watched as Erynn glanced down at her watch then looked up at him again. “Rich Evans doesn’t come back on shift for another few hours,” she told him. “I asked Micah while we were inside.”
“So, the paramedics?”
Erynn nodded.
“I’ll make the call.”
The Station 6 Fire Department had also provided the EMTs. Noah made the call and explained that he needed to talk to a few people.
The woman who’d answered and introduced herself as the station’s battalion chief asked, “Could you do the interviews at the station? Some of the men you’ve mentioned are retired now, but they could come here easily. Most of them live close, and some of the guys still work here and they’re on shift right now.”
Noah covered the mouthpiece with his hand and looked to Erynn. “You don’t mind going to the fire station, do you?”
She shook her head.
“That would be fine. We will be there soon, thanks.”
Noah ended the call, waited for Erynn to say something. “You nervous?” he finally asked her. He wasn’t sure he’d seen her nervous many times in their friendship, but she was behaving strangely now.
“I was thinking about Danny Howard.”
He could see that. “Is it weird that he married your mom?” Too late, he caught how he’d referenced Anne. Was that the right term to refer to her? He didn’t know and hated to risk offending Erynn.
If she was offended, it didn’t show. Maybe that was how she thought of Anne, when she wasn’t trying too hard to protect herself from feelings.
“No, actually. Once I thought about it, it’s nice. I just hate that he’s dead, too, you know?”
“I don’t think he is.” Noah hadn’t realized he’d thought it till the words were out of his mouth and realized now it was true.
“Why?”
“Because we didn’t find a body. This serial killer never goes to that much trouble hiding a corpse. The fact that Danny Howard wasn’t where we thought he’d be is a good sign.”
She seemed to consider it. “You could be right. Is someone looking for him, do you think?”
Noah had made sure of it hours ago. She didn’t need to know details, though, so he just nodded.
Once they were at Station 6, on the east side of town, he pulled into the parking lot in front of the station and they went to the door.
“Welcome.” A tall woman who looked to be in her early fifties answered the door. “I’m Chief Elaine Murphy, we spoke on the phone.”
“Moose Haven Police. Chief Noah Dawson.” He stuck out his hand, shook hers. “Thank you, Chief Murphy, for letting us come by today.”
She nodded once. “I don’t like the idea that anyone we have here could be responsible for any of the crimes you’re investigating, and I don’t think anyone is, but this is the quickest and best way to prove that.” She studied Noah for a minute, then looked to Erynn and nodded again. “I’ve got a fire truck out at the moment, so I thought you could just use that empty bay to conduct your interviews.”
Noah nodded, not wanting to cause any more trouble than just their presence already had. “That will work fine.”
“Any particular order you want me to send them out to you in?” Chief Murphy asked.
“Anything is fine.”
They interviewed two firemen, neither of whom raised Noah’s suspicions at all. Both men remembered the fire and remembered the kids, but did not seem emotionally invested. Noah was expecting that their killer would have been passionate about that night one way or another, as it had apparently triggered something in him that resulted in his becoming a killer.
“Next one,” he said when Chief Murphy walked in, shaking her head as she left again.
A woman entered the bay area. A paramedic, judging by her uniform. “I’m Annaliese Watkins. I heard you wanted to speak to me about the fire at Holloway House? That was years ago. Fifteen or so?” She shook her head. “I’d just started this job.” She smiled a little. “Literally, that was my first week.”
Well, this was finally getting interesting. Someone who’d been under a lot of pressure, in a new job, seen something that could have been dramatic...?
It still didn’t play out the way Noah would have expected, and that rubbed him wrong, but he was desperate for a lead. Any lead.
“Do you remember—?”
His words were cut off by the pop, pop, pop of close-range rifle fire. “Get down!” he yelled to Erynn and Annaliese. The chairs they were in, portable folding ones, clattered to the ground as they hit their knees. Noah looked around the bay. Empty. He didn’t see anything.
Glass shattered somewhere, but he couldn’t figure out where because the lights in the station flickered off. Came back on. Something to be thankful for.
He scanned the area again. Glass had been broken at the top of one of the bays. Shot out?
An alarm sounded. Noah tried to stay in front of Erynn, to keep her from getting shot. There had been a break: five seconds, then ten without shots fired. Did that mean it was over?
“Noah...”
Erynn’s voice was weaker than it should have been. Fear grabbed him, shook him with unrelenting force. If something had happened to her...
He turned around.
She was bleeding, the blood staining the blue of the jeans on her upper thigh crimson. He looked at her eyes, basic EMT classes he’d taken before coming to the forefront. Her color was good, breathing seemed normal. Shock wasn’t a threat right now, but if they didn’t get that seen to...
“Is everybody okay? We heard the shots.” The chief ran into the room, a paramedic they hadn’t met yet on her heels. “Chief Dawson?”
“No. Erynn’s bleeding.” He glanced over at Annaliese, who’d huddled behind a plastic chair and was now crying. “And your paramedic here needs attention,
too.” Noah needed Erynn’s injury seen to, and the hysterical woman beside them wasn’t going to do anyone any good.
“I’ll take care of her.” The Chief nodded, started speaking to the other woman in calm tones. After a minute, he helped her out, leaving Noah, Erynn and the male paramedic alone in the bay.
“Gunshot in the upper thigh?” The male paramedic motioned to the truck parked one row over. “Can she move this way? No, of course not. I can bring things to her, it’s fine.”
Noah knelt next to Erynn. “Are you okay?” He met her eyes, waited until she willingly met his and nodded.
“I’m going to be fine.”
He wished he were sure. Her leg was losing more blood than he was comfortable with, but he was still hopeful it might just be a bad graze. They could still finish the interviews... Was that what was best for Erynn, though?
“We can go back to Moose Haven...” Noah offered but trailed off. She wanted this case over as much as he did, but he felt like he had to offer. Thankfully she smiled, shook her head.
“No, I need to see this through to the end.”
If only her words didn’t sound so foreboding to him. The end held too much finality right now for a man who had just watched the woman he loved get shot.
* * *
Erynn’s leg stung, her pride along with it, but she tried to focus on her breathing as she waited for the male paramedic to finish gathering whatever supplies he needed to come back to her.
While she waited, she glanced at her watch again. Just another hour or so and they could go back to the police department and interview Rich Evans, the man she still wanted to talk to, there. One of the people they were talking to today had talked to her dad, been the last one to see him alive.
The one to end his life.
Erynn felt her face heat, the anger threatening to overpower her. It wasn’t fair. She’d never, ever, made peace with the injustice of it all, never would.
“Okay, let’s see what’s going on here.”
Just that fast she lost track of the other sounds around them, which became a dull blur in the background. That voice, she knew it. She’d heard it before.
Alaskan Christmas Cold Case Page 17
