by Rebecca York
“Would you like that? It’s going to be Christmas soon. We can find a nice big tree for the living room and decorate it together.”
“And I’ll be spending the night with you, right?”
“That’s right.”
Clapping her hands, giddy and excited, Hollie hugged the older woman, careful not to squeeze too tightly. “I’m so glad. Maybe we can go shopping and you can help me buy Mommy’s Christmas present.”
“Of course I will. We’ll have such fun.”
***
First, Belinda stopped at the hallway mirror, ran her hands through her hair and checked that her lipstick was still noticeable. She wanted to look presentable to the jerk who she had full intentions of berating.
She opened the door and the handsome man who looked up from his phone seemed just as shocked as she felt.
“Reed!”
“Lindy. Why you must be the person who takes such good care of Maeve. The one she brags about all the time. She calls you her sweet housekeeper.” He smiled, delighted with his conclusions. “I fully get it now.”
“She told me her doctor’s name was Dr. Darling.” Belinda’s feet seemed glued to the floor and she held onto the door, not opening it far enough to allow him entry.
He chuckled. “That spritely gal does have a way with nicknames, doesn’t she? That’s an old joke. You see I’ve always called her darling when I tried to talk her into certain… ahh, procedures. Her usual retort is… don’t you darling me, and now she calls me Dr. Darling in retaliation.”
He stepped forward, expecting her to let him in but she couldn’t move. For too long she’d held a grudge against the idiot who she’d decided hadn’t given proper care to Maeve. Now to find out that the idiot was none other than the man she’d slept with last night was more than she could handle.
Weak-kneed, tears close, she tried to make some sense of the confusion drumming in her head. “I don’t understand.” She turned away and moved quickly to sit down. “Maeve’s doctor is an old fool. It can’t be you.” Tongue loosened by shock, she blabbered the thoughts that had free range in her head. “I was going to give him – you -- a good talking to. For not operating. For giving up on her. Lung cancer can be managed with surgery. Yet you aren’t doing any. She’s dying and you aren’t trying to save her.”
“Darling—”
“Don’t you darling me either! I’m not an old woman who you can manipulate. I want answers.”
Reed stiffened. “I can’t talk about my patient with you, Lindy. You know I can’t.”
“But I can.” Maeve wheeled into the room and stopped next to Reed. She slid her hand into his and clung. “Hollie is fetching me some water so we don’t have a lot of time.”
“I’m sorry, Maeve.” Belinda didn’t know what else to say. She’d been caught messing in the other woman’s affairs, but she just couldn’t stand by and see such an injustice.
“Lindy, Dr. Carlton, who has always been a darling and patient man, tried continuously to talk me into surgery. He thought I had a good chance of surviving for longer but he couldn’t guarantee what level of functionality I’d be left with. You see, I’m also in the beginning stages of congestive heart failure which means that any operation is doubly dangerous. So it was my decision to enjoy the months I had left, be able to live them as normally as possible, and let the cancer eventually take me when my time came.”
Belinda stifled a cry but not before it was heard by the others. Reed hurried to her side and sat next to her as if shielding her from the pain of Maeve’s words.
Maeve wheeled closer and reached out her hand to her. “Please don’t cry. I’ve had a wonderful life, especially since you and Hollie came into it four years ago. You’ve been like a daughter to me and Hollie is as sweet a grandchild any old woman could have. With you moving in to help me, it will make it possible for me to spend the last of my days in my own home, and I can’t tell you how happy that makes me.”
Hollie sped around the corner, carefully holding a tall glass only half filled with water. “Here’s your water, Auntie…. Reed!” Hollie quickly passed over the glass and then ran, leaping into Reed’s open arms. She hugged him, exuberance spilling out—happiness lighting her pretty features.
“Hi, sunshine. So you’re the little angel that Maeve keeps talking about. Now I see the resemblance.”
Hollie laughed. “I don’t look like Auntie Maeve.”
“No. I was talking about the pretty angel I saw in a book recently. All you need are the wings.”
Giggling, Hollie gave him another hug. That’s when she noticed her mother’s face and saw the tears. “Mommy? Are you alright?” She wiggled away from Reed and ran to Belinda. “Mommy?” Fear rang in her voice and was just the strengthening agent Belinda needed.
“Yes, munchkin. I’m just happy that Reed is Maeve’s doctor and he’ll be helping us look after her.” Belinda patted Hollie’s arms and ruffled her hair.
“Can he help us get a Christmas tree too?”
Chapter Twenty-one
It took some time for Belinda to wrap her head around the fact that Reed was Maeve’s doctor. For so long, she’d held a grudge against the unknown physician that it took a lot of head-straightening to let go of her resentment.
Understanding that Maeve would not be having surgery hit her hard, took away her last hope. At most, her friend would live a few more months and Belinda would be left alone to parent Hollie. Never again could she bring those silly worries or proud accomplishments to Maeve. The ones most parents shared. The older woman’s simple logic had soothed her many times when she couldn’t see things clearly herself.
Working away like a zombie, cleaning out the upstairs bedrooms Maeve had designated for her and Hollie, Belinda’s mind teemed with everything that needed to get done.
She’d settled Maeve for her nap and had left Hollie happily working away in her new Christmas coloring book they’d picked up at the drugstore this morning….
Drugstore! How the heck could I forget?
Her hand dove into a pocket and found the three packages of different brands of pregnancy sticks she’d wasted money on. But she had to know. Would last night’s uncontrollable desires kick her in the ass again this time? Would she have to pay for the rest of her life for a night of enjoyment? It had been spectacular, mind-blowing, but…
She dropped the dust cloth and sped into the bathroom. Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, she stared into the mirror across the room. Slowly she approached and looked into her eyes.
What will you do if it shows positive? What – will – you - do?
She closed her eyes and thought back to the first moments she had found out about Hollie. How terrified she’d been, alone, and questioning everything she believed in. She remembered the litany. This was her baby. Hers! No father in the picture. She was alone.
Could she do it?
Would she do it?
A little baby…
The answer had come over her like a rush of knowing. She wasn’t a child herself this time—and she had skills. Life promised challenges but then hadn’t she always thrived on them?
Shaking herself away from the past, she lifted the first stick and unwrapped it. By golly, if she had another hardship to face, there’d be no negativity. Emotions flooded inside, love and gladness. If she was pregnant— right from the beginning—this baby would only know how much it was wanted.
Chapter Twenty-two
Reed woke up on Christmas morning, ruffled Cloud’s silvery softness and let the daydreams roll before starting the day.
The last few weeks had been hectic as hell and the night before weariness had caught up and slammed into him like a knockout punch from Mohammed Ali. Tuckered, he’d hit the sack and felt a lot better for the full eight hours he’d gotten.
Thinking back over the last couple of weeks, astonished at the amount they’d accomplished, satisfaction flooded in when he thought about how settled Lindy and Hollie now were with Maeve. They’d worked hard t
o set up Christmas for the old lady and her little sidekick, and last night, before he’d kissed Lindy good-night at the door, he’d taken one last look around and felt great.
The tree they’d bought from a farm on the outskirts of town sat in the corner beautifully decorated and glowed with Maeve’s old-fashioned twinkle-lights and the many ornaments she’d squirrelled away over her years of being a Christmas freak.
More twinkle lights had been intertwined with the garlands that were plastered in the main room and hallway, making a surprising display that had turned out rather classy and not the overkill he’d expected.
Hollie, vibrating with happiness, had made the work fun. He’d never wanted to please anyone as much as he’d found himself wanting to please the little dynamo. Free with her hugs, he’d cherished every moment her arms had wrapped around his neck and she’d squeezed him with affection.
Even Maeve had dug her way further into his heart and the hours they’d spent together gave him a huge amount of satisfaction. Remembering made him smile. The Sunday before, when they’d all worked together to get the outside of Maeve’s house looking as fancy as the inside, had been a blast. Snow falling added the perfect touch and Hollie had glowed. Hitting him in the face with a snowball, her crowning achievement, the munchkin’s giggles had infected them all.
“Why, you little monster, who taught you to throw snowballs like that?” He’d picked her up and heaved her over his shoulder, pretending to smack her well-padded bottom.
“My mommy. She can hit anything so you’d better duck.” Before he could, another snowball had smacked him in the back of his head. As soon as he’d released her, Hollie had ended up rolling in the snow, laughter convulsing her little body and Cloud hysterically licking her face which only added to her merriment.
He’d turned to face the attacker. “Why, you monster’s mommy, it’s more than past time to teach you a lesson.” He’d chased Lindy, thrown her over his shoulder and play-smacked her bottom as well. And she’d giggled in the same way as Hollie had.
Thinking back, Reed realized that those special moments were what he’d been missing from his whole, boring, predictable life.
He pictured Lindy, the girl, who’d burrowed her way inside him years earlier. Now, Lindy the woman had become as necessary to him as the food he ate or the air he breathed. Glowing, the center and essence for everyone around her, she lured him back day after day. He couldn’t stay away from her magic.
Smiling, happily knowing that he’d wormed his way into their circle, he decided the first step had come when he’d made her accept help for their move from him and his two brothers.
It turned out to be a wonderful day and it had solved one mystery they’d all pondered over. Harley, his younger brother, had shared some great news. He’d recently met the woman who owned Cloud’s mother. Long story short, the lady’s crazy brother had taken a dislike to the puppies. Against her wishes, he’d thrown them in a cardboard box and abandoned them in the park.
At first, Belinda had worried that she might demand the return of Cloud but Harley calmed her fears.
“Amelia’s fine about Reed adopting the little monster mutt. I told her how he spoils Cloud, buys her the best puppy chow from the vets and even lets her sleep with him, the big softie.” He’d grinned at Reed’s discomfiture, looking happy that he’d put the spotlight on his older brother.
“She won’t insist that Reed return Cloud?” Reed heard the worry Lindy couldn’t hide.
“Nope. Don’t you worry; she’s just glad that the puppy has found a good home.”
When she’d leaned over and loudly whispered to Harley, he’d found himself grinning like a besotted fool. “The man dotes on her, you know. Even bought her a pink rhinestone collar and had her name etched on the fancy dangling bone. You’d think he’d bought it for Hollie, she was that pleased.”
Watching his girl charm his favorite brother, having them bond to gang up on him, had made the day better.
His plan of bombarding her with his presence; wiggling his way into her life, seemed to be working. She began including him with everything they planned.
A movie night, a dinner date, even evenings spent watching television, they’d done it all, but he hadn’t talked his way back into her bed. No matter how hard he tried to beguile her, work his charm, she’d held him off—gently but firmly.
His disgruntled sigh woke the puppy, who yawned and wriggled then came searching for her morning rub. While satisfying Cloud’s needs, Reed thought of his own. Something stood in their way, stopped his and Lindy’s romance from moving forward. A few times he’d sensed she had a secret to share, had never seemed right, the moment had always been lost.
Thank God, each night she’d come to the door with him and say good-bye. Their only intimacy was when she’d see him out. Those brief moments were his favorite time of the day. She’d let him hold her in his arms, but her kisses were chaste and not in any way an invitation to take more than she offered. Every time he’d tried to open a conversation about the situation, she shut him down, gently but firmly.
He didn’t know how much longer he could stand it. Every time she sat near him, his heartbeats revved up and his hands itched to touch. Memories of their encounter rode him, making him remember. Being a man in love…
He shot up in bed unexpectedly and the unprepared puppy, now scrambling on the floor, whined and shook off the shock.
In love?
Chapter Twenty-three
Belinda moved over to the window side of the bed and turned in the direction where she could see the dark being gradually invaded by the soft glow of the morning sun. She stretched and then snuggled under the warmth; better take these quiet minutes to snooze. Soon Hollie would wake up and then Christmas would officially begin.
Over the last few days, she’d made up her mind: this was the day she had to let Reed go free. Pain radiated, driving her into a fetal position. Just the thought of losing him slashed a wound through her heart she didn’t think would ever be repaired. But she couldn’t keep him. It wasn’t fair to tie a man down with responsibilities he hadn’t asked for nor wanted.
It would have been better to end it earlier but she couldn’t break Hollie’s heart before Christmas. Both her baby and Maeve had built up such a hullabaloo for the holiday that she couldn’t darken the mood, not for them, and especially not for her.
Therefore, the moments she spent with Reed were bittersweet and to be stored for the future. Through his actions, the special smiles, the soft touches, him trying to get her alone, she sensed he wanted more but instead, she kept him at arm’s length. How could she lead him on when she knew their time was limited?
The squeaking door warned her someone was pushing it open slowly. Whispering, Hollie called out, “It’s Christmas, Mommy. Can I come in?”
“Of course. Merry Christmas, baby. Come and snuggle under the covers with me. It’s a bit too early to wake Maeve, and we promised Reed we’d wait until he arrives before we open our gifts.”
Hollie leapt into the bed and wriggled her cold little body into Belinda’s waiting arms, her icy feet landing on Belinda’s legs. “Hollie Page, where are your slippers?” Belinda reached down to scoop Hollie’s feet into her warm hands for a rub.
“I forgot. Mommy, I peeked downstairs to see if Santa had come, and he did. Oh, Mommy, there’re scads of presents everywhere.”
“Baby, I asked you to wait. Did you go all the way into the room?”
“No. Just to the doorway and then I came to get you. You know Santa ate his cookies and the milk glass was empty. I told you we had to leave him a lot. He gets hungry carrying so many parcels.”
Belinda swooped in for a hug. “I guess you were right, sweetie. I bet he enjoyed them.” She ruffled Hollie’s snarled curls and started to finger-comb them into some semblance of order.
Thinking back to the night before, after Maeve and Hollie had both gone to bed, Reed had helped her assemble Hollie’s new purple bicycle. Afterward, he’d s
coffed down the majority of the shortbread, commenting how much he liked the red sprinkles and green icing.
Seeing as how Hollie had been the decorator, which he couldn’t help but notice from the uneven mess, she’d grinned and whipped away two for herself. She remembered how he leaned in to lick the crumbs from her mouth and they’d ended up kissing hungrily, before she’d firmly pushed him away.
Hollie patted her face to get her attention. “Mommy? Do you think Reed will like my present?” The question had been asked and answered at least a dozen times.
The little artist had diligently painted him a special picture and had spent quite some time choosing the perfect frame. She’d drawn the whole family, including Maeve in her wheelchair, herself being held up in the arms of a really tall, dark-haired man who wore the largest smile, and of course Cloud, who sat proudly in front of Belinda.
Answering yet again, Belinda kissed her cheek. “He’ll love it, munchkin. I wish I had one too. It’s so beautiful.” Belinda meant that sincerely. It was a five-year-old’s rendition of love and a happy family, a treasure to keep forever.
Together with Hollie, Belinda had shopped for Maeve, Reed and her parents by going to a studio to have her and Hollie’s portrait professionally taken. Since Maeve had offered her frames from the stack of old ones she had stored away, one expense had covered all her gifts.
Hollie twisted in her arms, grinning at her mom. “Santa might bring you a surprise too you know? But only if you’ve been a good girl.”
“Cheeky monster. You know mommies are always good girls.” Belinda tickled her before lifting her high, crawling from the bed and heading for the bathroom. “Let’s get washed, brush our teeth and see if Maeve is ready to get up in case Reed comes early.”
