by Sandy Barker
‘Right, dream job …’ I felt myself relaxing, silently grateful for a reprieve from the hot seat. ‘I’d like to get to a point where I can do my job from anywhere – and still basically do what I do, consulting, but be location-agnostic.’
‘Location-agnostic? I haven’t heard that before, but I think I get what you mean.’ I filled my plate from the array of dishes while he explained.
‘It would mean paring back my possessions and moving about the world freely. A few months here, a year maybe. Asia, South America, Europe, parts of the States I’ve never seen. I’ll arrive and find a place to live – short-stay apartments, sub-lets, that sort of thing. I’ll live like a local as much as possible – try to learn some of the language if it’s different …’ He trailed off and took a bite of lamb.
I was intrigued; it sounded like a fascinating way to live. I wondered if I could live like that.
‘How do you get to a point where you can do that, do you think?’
‘I keep working on my skills as a developer, I put my hand up for the tricky, niche projects and I learn as much as I can over the next few years. I’ll want to get to a point where I can strike out on my own, choose which projects I work on, and as long as I have internet, I’ll be able to work from anywhere.
‘That’s the plan anyway.’
‘So, how do you get around work visas and those types of restrictions?’ The lamb was incredible, by the way.
‘Well, you’d be surprised by how easy it is to get a visa for a lot of places. And then for the rest, you usually get at least three months on a tourist visa and can be paid into a US account. There are a few things to work out – like not getting extradited for avoiding local taxes – but I’ll do my research.’
‘And you’ll have what? Your clothes, a laptop, and that’s all?’
‘And my phone.’
‘Oh yes, the phone.’ At the start of the trip, Josh had found it difficult to switch off from technology, and he’d brought his phone everywhere we went – even when there was no mobile or data coverage. Duncan had teased him relentlessly about it.
Then about halfway through the trip, we went out for the day and Josh purposefully left the phone on board. He’d done that ever since. Still, I got the sense it was something he couldn’t do without for very long.
It was like me wearing a watch again when I got back to the real world. Practically my whole life ran to a schedule, and that wouldn’t change because I’d taken my watch off for a week while sailing around the Greek Islands. On some level, I understood Josh’s attachment to his phone. Still, I was glad he’d left it behind, especially while we were on a date.
‘It must sound far-fetched,’ Josh said.
‘I don’t think so; it actually sounds feasible. As technology improves, and as social networks connect us with all these different threads to the people in our lives, it becomes less and less important to be there in person. I think the type of professional life you’re describing will one day be mainstream.’
‘I hope not! I’m going for this unique kind of “lone wolf wanderer” lifestyle. Hard to do that if everyone is doing it.’
‘Of course, by then, you’ll have found some other subversive way to live. I would never expect you to settle for being mainstream.’ I tried to ignore that he’d freshly declared his dream of a solitary life.
‘Right, exactly. Everyone will be off the beaten track, and by then I will have made my way back to Chicago, where it will just be one other guy and me.’
‘And Obama.’
‘Maybe he’ll be the “one other guy”.’
‘That would be cool. But what you’re saying is that you don’t let society define what you are – just what you aren’t.’ He eyed me with mock suspicion. Maybe he knew where I was going with my teasing. ‘But isn’t that the same thing? You’re still letting society choose what you are, aren’t you?’
‘This is getting way too deep for me.’ This time it was his turn to deflect. ‘You should try the briami, by the way. It’s fantastic.’ I put a large spoonful on my plate and took a bite. Delicious.
‘The briami is fantastic.’
‘Should I write this down?’
‘What?’
‘That I’m right.’
‘Hilarious. You’re so funny. No, really. I mean it.’ I hoped my accent didn’t mask the intended sarcasm, but he laughed, so I guessed not.
‘But getting back to what you were saying, I think your goal is impressive. You want to grow professionally, you want to travel, you want to dig into the places you see. It’s more than holidaying, it’s even more than travelling, because you’re buying groceries, you’re learning about the neighbourhood, the language, you’re meeting the people. It sounds incredible.’
‘Thanks. You know, I’ve never really told anyone about it before.’
‘Oh?’
‘Well, my friends, we’re close in a lot of ways, but – I’ve talked about this before – mostly they are married, or getting married, and buying houses, having kids. Talking about all this stuff with them – I don’t know. I never really thought they would get it, so I haven’t ever brought it up.’ He shrugged.
‘Well, you’ve thought it through. You have a semblance of a plan. Maybe it’s time to trust them with it – your close friends anyway. If they’re really your friends, they won’t judge you.’
‘It’s not that I think they will, but you know how you said that sometimes your friends look at you with the ‘head tilt’ thing, like they don’t really understand what you’re talking about?’
‘Oh yeah. I do. I get it. You’re more worried about that – having to explain the ‘why’ rather than the ‘what’.’
‘Exactly. That’s one of the things I like about being with you. I can tell you this stuff, and not only do you not judge me, you get it as well. It’s –’ he seemed to struggle for the right word, and then he found it ‘– refreshing.’
For a moment we regarded each other, smiling. The sweet, but awful toast and the awkward question about Neil faded away. It had turned back into a lovely date.
I refrained from stuffing myself with the incredible food by reminding myself – repeatedly – that I was on a date. Even though I was with Josh, who had seen me devour an entire gyro for lunch, it was still a date. And that meant date-like behaviour, and that meant not making a pig of myself.
When the waiter brought over a dessert menu, I politely declined and he graciously took it away.
‘Oh, sorry. I should have asked,’ I said, realising I had declined for both of us. ‘Did you want something?’
‘I had something else in mind.’ Had his voice dripped with innuendo, I would have assumed he meant that I was dessert. Men had used that line on me a few times – once it had actually worked. But Josh seemed to genuinely have something else in mind for dessert.
‘Oh?’ I prompted.
‘It’s a surprise. It’s also a little bit of a walk from here. Is that okay?’
‘Of course.’ I was intrigued. I also needed to pee, so I excused myself and went in search of the ladies’ room. As I washed my hands, I looked at myself in the mirror above the sink. I looked contented, and it sat well on me. I was also excited about the next part of the date.
When I returned to the table, Josh stood up to greet me. ‘You know, I should have told you before, you look really beautiful tonight.’
Suddenly shy at the compliment, I said a quiet ‘Thank you.’
‘How did Duncan put it? You scrub up nice.’
I grinned, my shyness dissipating. He knew just how to disarm me. ‘That is the correct saying, yes.’
‘Ready?’
‘Ready.’ He took my hand and led the way out of the restaurant. I smiled at the maître d’ on the way out and we climbed the stairs back onto the narrow street. ‘So, where to now?’ I asked, more and more curious about the next part of our date.
‘You’ll see.’
We walked in silence, traversing the hill and heading closer to the marina.
When we were in the thick of the bustling energy of the town and without warning, Josh stopped walking and turned towards me. ‘I don’t know if I can wait any longer.’
‘For what?’
‘To kiss you.’ He didn’t wait for my response – he just gathered, me into his arms and kissed me. I forgot where we were – standing in a busy street – and wrapped my arms around his neck. His mouth was hot against mine, and his lips firm and insistent. The tips of our tongues met, the only tentative part of the kiss. I melted into him, my body pressed to his. I felt desirable and treasured all wrapped up in him like that.
What seemed liked minutes later, we broke the kiss. His forehead pressed against mine, and I could feel his breath on my face when he spoke through a raspy voice. ‘Sarah, you’re going to be the undoing of me.’ I would unpack those words later, analysing every nuance, but in that moment, I took it for what it was. Because I felt the same. Exposed. Electrified. And completely his.
‘We’re here,’ Josh said as he stepped into a darkened doorway. I followed, my eyes adjusting to the dim light inside. Low-slung couches bordered the room, and tall stools lined up against a curved bar. There was a small, but lively crowd holding court at the bar, and a few couples seated on various couches. Josh spied a free one against the side wall, right in front of a low window which opened onto the street. He led me towards it and we sank into the slightly musty fabric. A pseudo-techno beat pulsed from an unseen speaker nearby, but not so loud that it drowned out conversation.
‘It doesn’t look like much, but Duncan says the cocktails here are incredible.’
‘Sounds great!’ After the kiss in the street, he could have taken me anywhere and I would have been enthused.
‘And they have a special dessert menu,’ he added.
My curiosity about this dessert was piquing. ‘You mean like they do in Amsterdam?’ I asked, imagining a menu of marijuana.
He laughed. ‘I hadn’t thought of that – that would be cool – but no. It’s something else.’ A waitress made her way over to us; it was obvious she wasn’t a Greek native. She greeted us with a North American accent, which I immediately picked as Canadian.
‘Hi, guys. Here’s our cocktail menu. We make a sidecar with Metaxa that is to die for. It’s totally my favourite,’ she enthused. I loved a good sidecar – second only to a gin and tonic – so I signalled I would have one without bothering to read the rest of the menu.
Josh added to the order. ‘Two please, and can you bring over the dessert menu?’
‘Sure!’
I watched her walk away. She was blonde, ridiculously pretty, and her body was killer. Without even thinking, I heard myself utter aloud the stupidest words I could ever say on a date. ‘She’s beautiful.’ What? I came to my senses immediately. Why on earth had I said that? To Josh!
‘She’s cute, I guess. You are beautiful.’ That surprised the hell out of me and for a moment I was speechless, with a sort of open-mouthed smile stuck on my face.
‘I wasn’t fishing.’
‘I know you weren’t.’
‘But that was the correct response.’
He threw back his head and laughed. ‘That’s awesome.’ He pulled me in for a quick kiss, his warm, soft lips pressed against mine for one delightful moment.
Our waitress came back. This time I regarded her with fresh eyes. She was pretty. But Josh thought I was beautiful. ‘Here you go – our dessert menu.’
Josh took it from her and I leaned in close to him – partly so I could read the menu, but mostly because I liked being pressed against him. The entire menu was different flavours of Loukoumia – what I would call Turkish delight. I’d bought a quite few pieces throughout our trip, indulging on an almost daily basis. The variety was incredible – so much more than the rosewater flavour I had come to associate with it.
‘Oh my god, I love this.’ I was practically drooling over the menu.
‘I thought you’d like this place. You can select it by the piece.’
My eyes widened at the thought of assembling the ideal tasting plate. ‘Okay. Here’s what I’m thinking – you can only eat two, maybe three, tops four pieces of this stuff in one sitting. I mean sure, we could take some away with us – we should do that – but how about we each choose two – no, make it three flavours, and we get two of each of those, and whatever we don’t finish tonight we take with us?’
I could hear the excitement – borderline obsession – in my voice, but Josh loved my enthusiasm, right?
‘You know,’ he started slowly, and I was immediately impatient with him. ‘I knew you would like this place, because I have watched you devour many pieces of this stuff, but there was no way I could anticipate this level of excitement over Loukoumia. I’m digging your passion.’
‘Don’t take the piss out of me, because I take my dessert seriously.’ I eyeballed him until he knew I was completely unserious.
‘That really is a charming expression,’ he retorted, nonplussed.
Ignoring him, I read from the menu. ‘Lemon, mango, and rose – gotta go traditional on my last pick.’
‘You’re not biting?’
‘Charming expression. I know – we Oss-ees are sooo crass! Now pick.’ I wasn’t biting, no. I was focusing on dessert.
Josh solemnly scanned the menu.
‘Okay, I’m going with pistachio …’
‘Good choice.’
‘Thank you. And, orange. Aaand, oooh, cherry.’
‘Noice,’ I said in my broadest Australian accent. ‘I loike your choices.’
On cue, the cute Canadian waitress appeared again with our drinks. Josh rattled off our order of Loukoumia and asked her to bring them all in a to-go box so we could take what we didn’t eat with us.
I lifted the glasses and handed Josh his drink. ‘Now I would like to propose a toast.’
‘Go for it.’
‘I would like to propose a toast to the best date I’ve ever had.’ My words hung in the air for a moment, but I didn’t care. It was the best date I’d ever had, because it was with Josh, and he’d been so thoughtful, and he was sexy and fun, and I was having a wonderful time. And most of all, because I was falling for him big time. I held my breath waiting for his response. I know that even though it felt like minutes, it must have only been seconds.
Finally, he clinked his glass against mine. ‘I’ll drink to that.’ We held eye contact over the rims of the glasses as we drank.
The Canadian was right. ‘Um, hello? This is delicious,’ I said, and then took another sip.
‘Not only the best date ever, the best sidecar ever.’
‘And, I’ll drink to that!’ I took another sip. Josh grinned at me.
Our selection of Loukoumia arrived in a white box lined with rice paper. We didn’t know which flavour was which and in the dim light of the bar, all we could do was guess. I bit into a piece, which turned out to be lemon – the lemon zing was so intense. I wondered how I could source some back home.
‘I wonder if when I get home I’m going to keep eating dinner at nine o’clock at night. A week ago it seemed weird, but now it’s my new normal,’ said Josh.
It was my new normal too, and I was fine with pontificating about our lives in the distant, unnamed future, but did I really want to think about what Josh would be doing when he returned to Chicago? No, I did not. It was another reminder that it was all coming to an end – and soon. And even though the trip wasn’t finished yet, it had already been the best trip I’d ever had. If I was going to avoid sinking into the moroseness that threatened to take hold, I would have to be honest with Josh.
‘You know what? I don’t want to think about that – what we’ll do when we’re all pulled in different directions, and not spending every day together – when we’re not a family anymore. It makes me sad. It makes the goodbyes that are coming feel too close.’
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.’ Well, good, because I don’t want to be upset.
‘Look,’ I said, �
�what if we do talk about the future, but we do it in the abstract? You know, “one day I think I might …” It’s just that when separation is nigh, I find it difficult to even think about it. I’m worried it will spoil the time we have left.’
‘I didn’t think of it like that, but I understand.’ He raised his glass. ‘To the here and now.’
I tapped my glass against his. ‘To the here and now.’ I took a sip. ‘In the broader sense, though, how fucking weird is it that they eat so late here?’
He laughed. ‘So weird.’
‘It’s the same throughout Europe. The Spaniards! They eat at, like, ten or eleven o’clock!’
‘I don’t get it. Are they up in the mornings and heading off to work for nine, like we are, or is the whole schedule skewed?’ Josh asked.
‘I think that they do get up for work the same as us, but the big difference is the siesta.’
‘Ahhh, the siesta. I seem to recall that you have availed yourself of that once or twice in the last week.’
‘Yes, but this is my holiday. We’re talking about people’s regular, everyday lives. I don’t know if I could live here all the time. I’m usually in bed by ten,’ I said.
‘Oh really?’
‘Yep. Does that make me boring? Or old?’ Anytime I could get in a little jibe about our age difference I did.
‘No, it makes you normal. What time do you get up?’
‘Most mornings I’m at the gym by six.’
‘Six? Why?’
I laughed. ‘Because I like to start my day that way. It energises me. I take it that you’re not a morning person?’
‘I like to ease into my day. You know, go through my Twitter feed, read about the latest tech, eat a cooked breakfast, have two cups of coffee, and then get ready for work.’
‘I’m gonna guess that I am at work before you even get in the shower.’
‘What time do you get to work?’
‘Usually before eight.’
‘Jesus! Yes, you are correct. At eight in the morning I am still the great hairy unwashed bachelor.’
I laughed.
‘By nine, however, I am suited up, clean-shaven, and looking fine.’
‘Oh, really?’
