I gently grab his chin, urging him to look at me. He finally sets his gaze on mine, his eyes full of longing. “You are so much more to me than just a knight, Lucien,” I say.
He lets out another soft sigh as he grips my waist tighter, drawing me in closer to him. I reach up, just barely grazing my lips across his. They tingle in anticipation, wanting to feel all of him.
Finally, he presses his lips against mine. Gently at first, becoming more urgent with each passing second. My skin burns hot with needs I never knew existed inside of me. I press my body closer to him, and feel his bulge against my stomach.
Anxiety sets in as flash backs of Elias swarms my head. I remember the way he grabbed me, the way he brutally stuck his fingers inside of me. I remember how afraid I was when I felt his bulge pressing against me, for I knew what was to come.
I want Lucien, more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. He excites me in a way I never thought possible, but the trauma I have endured these past few days has come crashing down on me. Suffocating me.
I slowly back away from him. “I’m sorry,” I say, breathless.
Lucien reaches up and brushes the hair from my eye, giving me a soft smile. “You have nothing to be sorry about. I’m sorry If I made you uncomfortable.”
I shake my head. “No. It wasn’t you. I just started getting flashes of...of…”. I can’t bring myself to say the rest. I can’t stand the thought of Elias’ hands on me.
He gives me a look of sympathy as he cautiously steps closer. “Come here,” he says in a whisper.
Lucien wraps his arms protectively around me. I bury my face in his chest, feeling like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders every time I breathe him in.
“I should have been a little more gentle with you. I’m so sorry, Blair,” he says.
“No,” I say, looking at him now. “Lucien, I want you. I want you in ways I never expected to want anybody. None of what just happened is your fault.”
He gives me a look of surprise, passion burning hot within him. “I had no idea you felt that way,” he says.
I let out a laugh. “How? Hasn’t it been obvious all this time?”
“Well, I always had the feeling you were attracted to me. But I had no idea you cared as deeply for me as I do for you,” he says, a small smile playing across his lips.
I caress his cheek, “Of course I do.” I press my lips to his again, and wish more than anything, he could stay with me through the night.
And I wish more than anything, this man was mine. Maybe then I could breathe again. Maybe then I wouldn’t be so afraid of everything.
I hear a light tap at the door and back away from Lucien. I know it’s probably just Milly, but I didn’t want to take the chance of anyone seeing us entwined as lovers. I couldn’t risk Elias ever finding out.
I stay in place for a moment, not wanting to let go of Lucien’s hand. I know this probably won’t be the last time we feel each other’s touch, but I wanted to stay like this forever. I never want a single moment I have with him to end.
Chapter 20
I finally settle into bed, wrapping myself tightly under the covers. It’s nearly midnight, and I can hardly believe it’s been twelve hours since Adelina’s life was brutally taken from her. I begin to shiver at the thought of what she must have gone through. Did they make it quick? Did she have time to be afraid? It must have happened as soon as I went to see Elias. That was the real reason he wanted to see me. It wasn’t so much so that he could yell at me for what I did. It was to distract me so I wouldn’t know one of my ladies was missing. How clever of him really. Why would anyone ever suspect their king of such a brutal act when he had an alibi? His alibi being me. That was just as sick and twisted in its own sort of way. He used me to kill my lady. My best friend.
My only comfort now is knowing that I have Lucien and Jake right outside of my door. I had Milly moved to the room directly across the hall from me, so I could keep her close. Tobias hand-picked the guards for her room himself. I would never trust anyone else in this castle to do it. Who knew which guards were loyal to Elias? So now, it’s really like Milly and I have four guards protecting us since our rooms are so close together. But how much protection could they provide if Elias decided he wanted to storm in and hurt me? Or kill Milly? He wouldn’t be alone, he’d have his loyal servants doing his bidding. He’d have a small army at his side. And if the king wanted to do something, he could do it. What guard would dare to try stopping a king? He’d be dead. Or if I know Elias like I think I do, he would kill their families like he’s threatened mine so many times before.
I try not to think too much about it. I let my mind go to Lucien. Of the kiss we shared, and the love I feel so deeply for him. But every time I close my eyes, I see Adelina. I see the blood dripping from her lifeless head. I see her eyes staring down at me as I sit in her pool of blood so helplessly. I can’t take it any longer. I have to get up and keep my mind busy.
I take out the inkwell and pen from the drawer, and begin writing my father:
Father,
How are you? I haven’t heard from you since you left Cryptshiere. A lot has changed since we last spoke, and I need more than anything to talk to you. I have an urgent matter I wish to discuss. I feel it is far too important to explain in a letter, so I hope you can come to me. I’ll be seeing you soon, father. Until then, know that I love you. Tell Liam I love him too. And give him a kiss for me.
Your loving daughter,
Blair
I fold the letter, and put The Queen’s seal on it, so father knows it’s an urgent letter. I’ll hand it over to Tobias so he sees it safely leaves the castle. He’s been here long enough to know who is to be trusted and who isn’t. But even if it were to get in the wrong hands, I left it just vague enough. Hopefully Elias would only think that I wanted to speak to father about giving up my claim.
I open the door to my room, turning to Jake. “Jake, will you please take this letter to Tobias? It’s urgent,” I say.
“Of course, your majesty. Right away,” he says, taking the letter.
“Oh, and Jake? This needs to be kept between us. Don’t let anyone suspect anything, okay?”
“Yes, your majesty,” he says, bowing his head, quickly walking away.
Lucien gives me a curious look. But before I can say anything, a maid comes to me.
“Your majesty? I was asked to give this to you,” she says handing me a piece of crumpled up paper. She quickly walks away before I can ask her any questions.
I look down at the paper, suddenly feeling nervous. Anything that happens in this godforsaken castle is never good. I open it to see a beautifully hand written note.
Blair, I must speak to you right away. Come to the dungeons. -Charolette
My hands begin to shake as I see the name. Charolette. She’s never been anything but suspicious from the moment I arrived at the castle. And where has she been? Why is she in the dungeons?
I suddenly realize what Randolph said to me earlier. He hadn’t seen his mother in a long time. When he mentioned it, Elias became more aggravated. Was it possible that she was being held as a prisoner? But why?
“Blair, what is it?” Lucien asks.
My mouth is dry, and I’m having trouble getting my words out. “It’s-It’s Charolette. She wants to see me in the dungeons,” I say.
Lucien’s eyes widen. “Blair, no. You cannot do that.”
“Why?”
“Because, what if it’s a trap? It could be the king’s way of getting you down there,” he says.
“That doesn’t make any sense, Lucien. If he wanted to hold me in the cells, he’d just drag me down there himself. He would have no need to lure me into a trap.”
He stays silent, as he clenches his jaw with worry.
“Besides, you heard Randolph today. He said he hadn’t seen his mother in a long time. I have a feeling she’s being held down there,” I say.
His eyes soften. “I had forgotten abo
ut that,” he says, and then sighs. “If you insist on going down there, I’m going with you.”
I give him a smile. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Just as we’re getting ready to leave, Jake comes back, confirming that he dropped the letter off to Tobias. Lucien suggests he come with us. We have no idea what to expect when we get down there.
We make our way down the winding dark halls, the only source of light is the moon shining brightly through the windows. I’ve never wandered through the castle this late at night before, and it has an unsettling feel. The silence is deafening, and my heart begins to pound harder with each step I take.
We reach the stairs to the dungeon and I stop, wondering if I’m making a mistake in coming here. What if this was some kind of a trap?
Lucien draws closer to me, his chest grazing my shoulder as he whispers, “One of us will be in front of you. The other, behind you.”
“I’ll go first,” Jake whispers back.
He heads down the deteriorating stone steps, and I let out a breath. I should turn around. I shouldn’t be doing this. Nothing good could come from going down to the cells in the middle of the night.
“It’s okay. I’ll be right behind you,” Lucien assures.
I give a quick nod, and make my way down the steps before I can think any more of it.
It’s surprisingly quiet down here, with no one in the cells. I was expecting them to be full of people that Elias had held prisoner. I expected them to be bloodied from the torture they have endured. I expected shaking hands reaching out to me, crying for help as I walked past them. But there was nobody. Just dark, empty cells. The floor and walls appear to be moist with condensation. The only source of light is coming from a small torch hanging by the stairway.
I hear shuffling in the cell closest to the wall on the other side of the room, and I hesitate. Jake comes up beside me, and Lucien follows suit on the other side. They have their hand positioned on their swords, ready to fight at any given moment.
I pray it doesn’t come to that.
“Is someone there?” Charolette says in a small voice. It’s coming from the far cell.
“It’s me. Blair,” I say, cautiously walking up to her.
When I finally reach her, I’m taken aback. She looks pitiful. She doesn’t look like the fierce woman I know. Her hair is mangled in a nest on the top of her head. Her skin blackened with dirt.
“Charolette?” I ask. “What are you doing down here?”
She reaches her hand out to me desperately, and I instinctively grab it.
“Oh, Blair,” she says in a sigh of relief. “It’s Elias. He’s gone completely mad.”
“He...he did this to you?” I ask. Honestly, who else?
Charolette nods her head slowly. “I need you to understand. I didn’t mean to treat you so terribly when you first arrived here. I didn’t want to, I should say.”
I give her a confused look. “So why did you?”
“I was hoping it would make you reconsider your marriage with my son. If I was terrible enough, terrifying enough, you might want to leave while you still had the chance.”
I stand still, stunned. “Why?” Is all I can manage to say.
She gives me a pitied look. “Oh, darling. I know what he did to you. He did the same thing to Marjorie so many years ago. When I found out that you were assaulted, I knew it was my son who did it to you. I was terrified. For you. For all of us. I confronted him, asking if it was he who harmed you. He admitted it like it was nothing.” She stops briefly, rubbing a shaky hand over her forehead.
“I told him I wouldn’t let him get away with it a second time. That’s when he threw me down here. He said if I ever opened my mouth on the subject again, he’d have me killed.”
I begin to shake, almost uncontrollably. I knew Elias was insane. This shouldn’t surprise me. Nothing about that man should surprise me anymore. But it just keeps getting worse. How will I ever manage to get out of this? I’m about to end up just like Marjorie. Dead.
I cave and tell her everything. I need someone with some power to know what has been happening. Even if she is locked up down here. She’ll know what to do.
I tell her about Elias threatening my claim to Myrkdovia’s throne. How he has guards sitting in Myrkdovia, waiting to kill my father and cousin if I make one wrong move. About how he brutally assaulted me, and how he tried executing an innocent man for his act. And I told her how I stopped the execution and stormed off.
Her eyes become wide. “Dear, God. Blair, you need to keep an eye out. He’ll never let you get away with that.”
A tear slides down my cheek. “He killed my best friend, and put her head in my chambers,” I say, choking back a sob.
Charolette puts a hand to her mouth, tears welling in her eyes. “God, no. I’m so sorry, Blair. He has gotten much worse than I thought. You need to leave here. Immediately.”
“I wrote my father. He should be here soon. I could say that I need to go back to Myrkdovia to tie up a few loose ends.”
She nods her head. “Yes, that should work. I don’t think he’d start anything in front of your father.”
“I better be going before Elias notices I’m gone,” I say, turning to walk away.
“Blair?”
I turn to look at Charolette. Her eyes filled with sadness and defeat. “Promise me you’ll look after Randolph. Promise me you’ll take him with you when you go. I can’t have him here growing up around Elias.”
I give her a soft smile. “I promise. I’ll protect him and love him as if he were my own child.” I pause for a moment. “But I will get you out of here.” I don’t know how I planned to do that, exactly. But now I had to.
She lets out a sigh of relief, giving me a nod. “Thank you, Blair.”
Once back to my room, I collapse to the bed and let out a huff. I’m having trouble processing everything Charolette just told me. So she’s just as terrified of Elias as I am. Her own son. And she always has been.
I always knew the rumors about the way Marjorie died were true. Especially after what Elias did to me, I had no choice but to believe it. But I always had my doubts. I’ve always doubted that I could see the dead. That I could see into the past. Things like that just didn’t exist in my world. But now they did. And Charolette just confirmed it.
There’s so many things in my life right now that I just can’t wrap my head around. Never did I think my life would come to this. Any of it. I never thought I’d marry a mad man. I knew I would have to marry a man I probably didn’t love. But I never expected the man I married to be dangerous. Deadly. I never expected this same man to take the life of my best friend and display her in such a horrific way. I never expected I’d fall in love with a man I could never have. And have that man love me in a way I could only hope for in my dreams. I was stuck in an impossible situation. One that could only end in bloodshed and death. And I had a feeling the blood had just only begun to spill.
The only thing I am absolutely certain of, is this will end. One way or another .
Chapter 21
“Blair?” I jolt upright, for I know this voice.
She’s sitting on my bed next to me, looking at me with such sadness my heart begins to break for her.
“Marjorie,” I say.
“I’m sorry about Adelina. She should have never been taken from this world so soon.”
”How do you…?” I stop myself. Of course she knows. She sees and hears everything that goes on in this castle. Somehow.
“Thank you,” I say.
“She didn’t suffer. She didn’t see it coming at all,” Marjorie says.
“You saw it happen?” I ask. “Who did it? Was it Elias?”
“He gave the order. His puppets swung the axe.”
I flinch. They beheaded her while still alive. And she never saw it coming. She was going about her day, not knowing she’d be dead before she could take another breath.
“How do I get out of this, Marjorie?” I
ask helplessly.
She gives me a soft smile. “You’ll find a way.”
“How can you be so certain?”
She sits all the way on the bed now, crossing her legs. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think she was alive. She looks so normal. So human. If it weren’t for the deadly pale skin, and the slight glow she has, I would have to second guess myself, thinking maybe she just lived in the castle walls or something.
“I can’t explain how I know, Blair. All I can tell you is, one day the answer will just come to you. And you’ll act on it,” she says.
“When?” I ask. “We need to get out of here soon.”
“Soon,” She confirms. “But I must warn you, more destruction will come your way before you leave here. Starting tomorrow.”
My heart leaps to my throat and my skin tingles hot. “What happens tomorrow?”
Marjorie shakes her head. “I don’t know for certain. It’s more of a feeling. A knowing. Please just keep your guard up.”
“I will,” I say.
“That dashing guard you’ve got should do the trick,” she says, teasingly.
I look up to her, a faint smile playing at my lips. “So you know about Lucien too.”
She lets out a laugh. “I know all, Blair. I see everything, all at the same time.” She stops, staring off into the distance. “It gets to be a little too much at times.”
“You can’t leave? And go to...I don’t know...heaven?” I ask.
“It’s not so much heaven, as it is a different realm.” I give her a confused look, but she ignores me and continues, “ But yes, I can go whenever I want to. I’m choosing to stay here.”
“Why would anyone choose to stay in a place like this?” I ask, shocked.
“For you, Blair. I’m here to help you through this. I can’t watch your life end the same way mine did. I stayed all these years after my death because I knew you’d be coming.”
I’m speechless. And humbled. A girl I don’t even know, never had known, stayed to help me. Even after death.
“Marjorie…” I say, instinctively reaching out to touch her hand. But I feel nothing but ice cold air. I reach my hand back, startled for a moment.
The Deadly Alliance (The Deadly Alliance Series Book 1) Page 14
