by M J Marstens
“For ninja pegging.”
Again, I’m left in a state of utter bafflement.
This time, I don’t ask for an explanation, but simply look into her thoughts.
And immediately regret it.
She has Lina bent over a very specifically labeled barrel and is. . .fucking her.
In the ass.
And, I forgot to add, she’s dressed like a ninja.
Is this something American women do to one another for fun?
I hate Lina. . . but there’s definitely something erotic about the fantasy.
Until Mars replaces Lina.
It takes a lot to frighten the man who rules sickness, pain, and suffering, but damn if I don’t scream like a bairn when I’m suddenly in the picture and getting fucked in the ass. It might be just her imagination, but damn if the lass isn’t mental.
She laughs hysterically while I glare at her.
“You’ve killed the mood.”
“Pft, the mood was over. We both got off; now let’s go direct.”
“It’s sad when Death is the romantic in the relationship,” I comment. “You know you could hop dimensions and just collect us all?”
“Yeah, but Nyam said you would all know when I made you direct and it’s just faster. We can all meet in the third dimension.”
“Alright, do your thing, but first, clothes. Oh, and never think about ninja pegging again.”
Another giggle escapes as I feel cloth form over my body. It feels like some kind of robe, but I don’t even bother asking. I can’t see it, so it doesn’t bother me. Another second passes and I can sense her concentration and then. . .
We’re in the third dimension again.
I still can’t see, but the lack of brightness is almost staggering.
“Zahra?” I hear Mercury call out weakly.
“Mio!” She yells.
All around me, my brothers shout greetings to one another. I wish I could see them, but it’s good to be together once more.
Neptune claps a hand on my back, “I see you’ve let Zahra dress you.”
I wince, having forgotten.
“What are you dressed in? Hogwarts’ robes?” Uranus asks.
“What the fuck are Hogwarts’ robes?” I wonder.
Mars comes up, chuckling, “You three really need to indulge in some Western society.”
I hear the twins scoff and mimic them.
“Well, she didn’t dress you in wizarding robes. She’s dressed him as the Grim Reaper,” Mars tells the twins.
Even I know who the Grim Reaper is.
So Zahra thought it funny to dress up Death as the Grim Reaper?
What a little smartass.
I mutter this comment out loud and Mars laughs some more.
“You going to retaliate?” he asks me.
“Good god, no!” I shudder in genuine fear.
I can feel Mars’ curious gaze on me.
Whatever scares me should terrify everyone else.
I send my warfaring brother a mental image of Zahra’s ‘ninja pegging’ and feel him blanch inside my head.
“She’s still on that, huh?” he finally chokes out.
“What?” Neptune asks.
“Trust me, you don’t want to know,” Mars assures him.
Neptune is smarter than the rest of us and doesn’t push for more details.
Or maybe he saw into Mars’ thoughts and is in shock.
I don’t have time to contemplate it further, because Zahra is calling us all to attention.
She clears her throat a couple of times.
“We did it! We finally made it back together again! I’m going to call the Minors together, and then we are going to get a plan of action to break this curse! We. Are. Going. To. Bend. Moon’s ass. Over. The. Barrel,” she shouts in staccato triumph, “and ninja peg the shit out of her!”
Mars’ and Saturn’s groans join mine.
Fuck our lives.
CHAPTER 20
ZAHRA
I feel the deep glow of love spread through my body when I see all my guys together again. Of course, we all ended up back in their office. Fitting, since this is where it all began. I’m so happy to see Mio again. I run to him and tackle him to the ground, kissing his face over and over. He’s so weak that he’s in human form, so I feed him some of my powers with each kiss to fortify him.
Caed, Khal, Arawn, and the twins are still in god form, and I’m glad to see how strong they are. I know Caed and Arawn can pull strength from me through our bond and the others can do the same from one another. I feel the others feeding Mio energy, as well, and my grin grows. Bitchhole’s attempt to weaken us didn’t work!
Unless you count losing Nyam and Kane. . .
Fuck, she did weaken us.
I push the depressing thoughts out of my head. We’re finally together again and we need a plan of action.
ASAP.
I call everyone’s attention by shouting my intentions of getting the Minors and ninja pegging Lina’s ass. Instead of a resounding cheer, I’m met with silence. I take that back, Khal and Caed are groaning. Ungrateful wretches! I give them a glare, then close my eyes and summon the Minors to me. Instantly, Vesta answers that she, Ceres, Juno, Pallas, and the Elements are on their way.
“What about Edgar?” I ask Mrs. Gerty.
“He’s decided to stay back in the tenth dimension. He’s investigating something.”
“What?”
“I don’t really know,” Mrs. Gerty murmurs absently in my head.
I suddenly get the image of her, staring at Water, with the same love-struck face he’s looking at her with.
Ugh, young love.
Caed chuckles at my thoughts.
“We’ll be there soon,” Mrs. Gerty promises.
Khal, of course, then takes over bringing order to our group. He walks over to his computer and checks something, before announcing:
“We have only a few days before the total lunar eclipse. Much time has been lost in the other dimensions, as well as two of our brothers. As Zahra said, we need a plan of action now. We know Lina will be at her strongest during the eclipse. Zahra is the one who realized this.”
“What else have you learned?” Mio asks me.
I think back to my conversation with Caed when he feared the curse was closing in on them and I first realized about the total lunar eclipse. I parlay the conversation back to the others:
“You all know I got into a fight with Bitchhole-”
“I didn’t,” Mio interjects.
“Caed, would you catch him up to speed?” I ask the rust-red man-god. “I fisted her good,” is all I say to Mio, whose eyes widen. “As I was saying, I realized something while fighting that slippery cuntcushion. The astrological movements of the third dimension affect the planetary gods, in any dimension. Lina, as Moon, is the fastest moving body in the third dimension and as such, she quickly changes houses and signs. I watched this pattern in the fluctuation of her powers as her planet became ingress- that is, as it entered a new sign. If she’s compatible with the sign, it strengthens her powers, but if it’s not a compatible sign to the Moon, it weakens her. Of course, the moon phases also plays an important role, too. Lina’s strongest during a full moon and weakest at a new moon. That’s when it hit me, the total lunar eclipse will be upon us soon, and that’s like a full moon on ‘roids. Worse, this full moon will be in Libra, the sign of partnerships. Not only is this a compatible energy for her power, but it also will allow her the tools to manipulate your relationships with her. She’ll be practically unstoppable in creating the bond she wants with you guys. She isn’t going to let you guys not choose her.”
I lapse into silence as the guys mull over my words.
“Also,” I continue after a moment, “I realized my powers are not as strong because Venus and the Sun are still semi-square right now, so Nyam’s Luminary energy is not at its most compatible with my inherent powers as Venus, but that should change a little before the total lunar ec
lipse. I’m hoping with having her Luminary powers stripped and cutting off her access to the Minors, Lina will be weaker. Theoretically, I’m stronger, but the full moon puts her in a position to exert dominance over you guys via the curse. I guess, in a way, you can say she bonded you to her with it and can control you through it, as she has for centuries here on Earth. Until the curse is broken, you are beholden to her. You say I’m the key to breaking the curse, but I’m not sure what I can do. . . Venus’ powers aren’t a counterpoint to the Moon’s.”
“Actually, I’ve been thinking on this,” Khal announces and I smile.
Of course he’s been thinking about this.
“I don’t think it’s necessarily your powers as Venus as much as your tie to this dimension and your humanity.”
I wait for him to expound as Caed, the twins, Arawn, and Mio shake their heads in agreement. I wait some more and realize the obnoxious man has said his piece. How in the holy fu-
“She’s ranting at you in her head,” Caed tells Khal.
“What did I do?” he demands.
“Apparently, you didn’t explain yourself. She’s confused. And we should probably turn back into human form,” Caed comments casually.
I watch as the man-gods effortlessly shift into their familiar human skins. I had missed my golden Wildman; of all of the guys, he’s the most different in god form. It’s nice to see the twins looking identical again, and I adore Arawn’s green eyes. Don’t get me wrong, these men are smokin’ as gods, but it takes a little getting used to. . .
They look at me expectantly.
Oh, right, I finally get to be me again.
I close my eyes tightly and concentrate.
I want to be peach.
Not a peach.
I want to be Zahra Delsol.
I also wanted to be taller, with bigger boobs, and-
“NO!” Caed’s shout interrupts my thoughts. “You’re fine the way you are. Besides, you’ll end up a fucking giraffe with tits; just be you.”
I glare at him while I will myself to be human once more.
I know I’ve accomplished the goal when the immense weight of my long hair vanishes.
The familiar brownish-blonde strands and sun-kissed skin make me smile.
I wrap myself up in a hug and the guys chuckle.
“Khal, what did you mean about being tied to this dimension?”
“Remember we told you that when we came to the third dimension, although mostly empty, some things were already here?”
“Yes.”
“Well, the planet Venus was one of those things. I think you’re inherently part of this dimension in a way we will never be, as if the Universe knew you would be needed someday and already had you in place. Almost as if this is your domicile. And although Lina controls humanity as its creator, you’re on a different level. You don’t remember your godhood; only, I’m not convinced you had one before this. You were created to balance the Moon, but your existence has been a human one. A very specific human life, too. How many people know astrology to the degree you do? Everything you have done and learned has been for this purpose.”
“So much for free will,” I joke.
“You have free will,” Arawn says gently. “You don’t have to do anything.”
“And let Bitchhole make the men I love miserable? As if,” I say in my best Clueless voice.
“You love us?” Khal asks quietly.
Oh shit.
RED ALERT! RED ALERT! RED ALERT!
“What’s she thinking?” Illu wonders.
Both Arawn and Caed struggle to explain my panic.
“Sirens are going off in her head. . .” Arawn attempts, but trails off in confusion.
“What’s wrong, little girl?” Caed queries inside my head.
“I won’t soul bond with anyone else!” I hiss adamantly, fear twisting my insides.
The twins and Mio look crestfallen at my announcement, but Khal raises a hand in supplication.
“Ok, no one said you had to. How about we get back on track?”
Just then, the office door opens and in walks Mary.
CHAPTER 21
NEPTUNE
We all freeze, as Mary walks into the office and then screeches like a frightened hen when she sees us all. Papers go flying and she has a hand over her heart, which is beating wildly inside her chest. I feel a pang of guilt for scaring the older woman; humans are such a fragile species.
“H-h-how did you get in here?” she croaks when she finally finds her voice.
“Secret entrance,” Khal says flatly. “Sorry to have startled you, Mary. Here, let me help you pick those up. Did you get a call about the Anderssen account?”
His smooth explanation and questions put Mary at ease and divert her attention.
“Yes, Mr. Al-Zahil. I will get your messages and faxes.”
She leaves with a frown marring her brow, but says nothing more about our presence.
“She’s gone,” my twin needlessly points out. “Zahra, you mentioned the Moon becoming ingress. Are there any other fluctuations that might help us? Or are we entirely fucked?”
Both Zahra and I raise a brow at my brother’s words.
“Ingress just means the Moon’s entered a new sign,” Zahra reiterates. “I mean, again, it depends on the sign the Moon’s entering. . . Wait! I forgot! The void-of-course!”
She shouts the last part triumphantly, a beatific smile lighting her face, making an answering one grace mine. I feel Uranus stir with lust, but my own loins are already on fire with a need to claim her, to make her want us as much as we want her.
“Of course, the void!” Mercury cheers.
Zahra tips her head back and laughs, and we all revel in her carefree nature.
“No, not of course, the void. The void-of-course. It’s an astrology term. It’s when the Moon is transiting into a new sign and makes no aspects to other planets during this time. Theoretically, it’s the weakest point for the Moon. The only time Lina would be weaker is during the void-of-course while in a new moon phase.”
“How long does this void last?”
“Depends. Minutes to a few hours.”
Saturn swears eloquently.
“Listen, you sexy sailor,” Zahra says. “I can look it up and get an exact time.”
She rounds the desk and starts typing something on the keyboard. As she works, the office doors open again and Mary peeks her head back in.
“Gentlemen, ah, there’s some people to see you in the lobby. Security will not let them pass. . . the gentlemen are dressed oddly. In, ah, cloaks of some sort. They insist on speaking with you. A Mrs. Gerty is leading them. I’ve directed to have them put in the second-floor conference room until you can clear them.”
“Mrs. Gerty is here? Woohoo, I did it!” Zahra enthuses.
“Ah, you know this woman, my dear?”
“She’s a Minor go- minor friend,” Zahra corrects.
Mary tips her head in confusion.
“We’ll be right down. Thank you, Mary,” Saturn tells our secretary.
“Of course. I will go inform security.”
She leaves and Saturn, Mars, Pluto, and my twin start after her.
“Neptune and I will stay with Zahra while she does her research,” Merc announces to the others.
I raise an eyebrow, but if it means not having to see the elemental fucks Zahra created, so be it. I don’t care if they’ve found their soulmates, they still lusted after mine. I feel my twin’s amusement at my thoughts and give him a mental shove. As if he doesn’t feel the same way.
We sit silently while Zahra works on the computer, and I debate whether to speak telepathically with Mercury. I want to know what he’s done with Sun’s essence, but he looks so beaten. Weak. Even though we could all feel Zahra feeding him power, he still seems so frail.
“Zahra, you never did tell us about those homemade tampons,” he suddenly states.
Both Zahra and I give him the same bewildered look. I try to sca
n his mental thoughts, but find he’s blocked me.
“Bratik,” I call to my twin. “Merc is up to something.”
“Do you need me to come back up there? Please say yes,” he commands.
“Why? What’s wrong?”
“Fucking Josh Maitland, from the Austin, Texas branch is here. He’s waylaid us. Mary’s gone on to tell the Minors we’re coming, but I hate all the bureaucratic shit.”
Now I’m glad Merc picked me to stay behind.
“Mercury just asked Zahra to tell him about her homemade tampons,” I tell my twin.
“I’ll listen to Maitland’s crap,” he quickly blurts out in my head and I chuckle.
The fucking god of independence and new novelties doesn’t want to hear about homemade tampons? I shake my head and turn my attention back to Zahra, who is still looking confused.
“You want me to tell you about my homemade tampons, now?” she asks my distant brother of communication.
“Yes, please,” Mercury asks in his accented English.
“Um, ok. So my junior year of high school, I thought I might make some extra money making homemade organic products, like body scrubs and such.”
I glare at Mercury for even asking. How the hell does someone go from making body scrubs to making tampons?
“Neptune is curious as to how you went from body scrubs to tampons,” Merc comments deviously.
I scowl at the instigative fucker, but what else can I expect from the trickster of the group? He gives me an evil smile as Zahra starts in on me.
“I think it was a natural progression, quite frankly. And, I mean, anyone could buy organic body scrubs, but homemade tampons? Come on. I had the market cornered!”
Merc nods sagely at me and then encourages Zahra to continue.
I might strangle the bastard.
I can hear Uranus laughing in my head over his antics.
“Hope you’re enjoying fucking Maitland talk out of his ass!” I snark to my twin.
“Not as much as you’re enjoying Zahra talk out of hers!” He rejoins.
I really don’t have a rebuttal to that and turn my attention back to the train wreck unfolding before me.
i.e. Zahra talking.
“So I did some research and learned that in the olden days, women would make tampons out of cotton. Smart, right? Unfortunately, I didn’t have access to freshly-grown cotton. I’m from Minnesota, remember? So I substituted. . .”
