by Beth Bolden
“And Ren, of course,” Sean said in a teasing voice, like he knew that him mentioning Gabe’s cousin in this context would bother him. But Gabriel knew now that Sean had never been interested in Ren—except to drive him crazy enough to give in.
“Ren was scandalizing everyone forever,” Gabe said. “I think he enjoys it.”
It had never occurred to Gabriel that, for Ren, it was about anything else other than enjoying himself and life, but after their conversation yesterday morning, he had to wonder. Had someone broken his cousin’s heart, and he’d never realized it?
Had nobody ever realized it?
He thought about asking Ren, but it was clear from what he’d said that he wouldn’t talk about it.
“Someday,” Sean said, smiling as he took a few steps closer to Gabe, “someday he is gonna meet someone who makes him reconsider everything.”
Gabriel couldn’t help but think Ren had already met the person who’d made him reconsider everything. But he didn’t want to betray his cousin’s confidence, so he just nodded. “Yeah, that’s gonna be a day,” he said.
“Lennox was prowling around right as it was getting dark,” Sean said, changing the subject. “Did you see him?”
Gabriel nodded. He had, off and on all day. And he’d seen some of what had to be Lennox’s employees, all in seemingly identical dark suits, prowling around, checking the cameras that they’d been putting up around the perimeter of the lot.
“I guess we’re gonna have to keep it in our pants on the lot now,” Sean said with a dimpled grin. “There won’t be any more dark corners to make out in.”
“It’s alright,” Gabriel said, putting an arm around Sean’s shoulders and tugging him closer. “I’m perfectly happy to make out in your bed. Or on your couch. Or in your kitchen.”
Sean smiled. “Yeah, I bet you are,” he teased.
“Hey, as long as the making out is part of it, I’m satisfied,” Gabriel said. Which was the honest-to-God truth. He didn’t want or need more, just Sean pressed up against him, loving every moment.
“I could use a little more satisfaction right now,” Sean said, wiggling a bit.
“You’re incorrigible,” Gabe said, but suddenly he wished they could go back to that dark corner and he could get Sean off, without anyone else knowing.
But with Lennox and his people skulking around, Sean was probably right; those days were over.
“I guess we should enjoy the music,” Sean said mournfully. “You want to grab a beer?”
“You closed for the evening?” Gabriel wondered.
Sean nodded. “Everyone’s here for the band. And the beer.”
“I left Ren holding down the fort,” Gabe admitted, “but you’re probably right. We can close down. Alexis always stays open late, and so does Tony.”
“The blessing of having employees,” Sean said.
“You could get one,” Gabriel said. He knew Sean sold enough that he could afford it.
Sean shot him a look. “And put them where exactly?”
“I’m not sure, but it’s something to think about. You can’t do everything, forever,” Gabriel said.
Sean didn’t argue, just gave a thoughtful hmmm to Gabriel’s suggestion.
“I’m gonna tell Ren to close up,” Gabe said, pulling out his phone, and shooting Ren a quick text. He looked up, and Sean was staring at him, expectantly. “You wanna go grab a beer and a dance?” he asked casually, like his heart wasn’t in his goddamn throat. Because sharing a drink and definitely sharing a dance wasn’t what hookups did. But they hadn’t been doing what hookups did for awhile now. Honestly, Gabe wasn’t sure they’d ever done what hookups did.
But Sean didn’t argue or look conflicted at all. He just grinned, brightly. “That sounds great,” he said. “The music sounds great tonight.”
Gabriel didn’t say that it wouldn’t have mattered if the music sounded like a toddler pounding on a toy drum set, he would’ve still wanted to dance with Sean.
“Yeah,” he agreed, hand sliding down Sean’s back, resting right in the small of his back, feeling the heat of his skin through the thin fabric of his t-shirt. They wandered over to where Tony was pulling beers.
“Hey,” Tony said glancing up at them. “It’s a great night, isn’t it?”
“It is,” Gabriel agreed. “I’m glad we do this.”
“I’m glad we’re still doing this,” Sean added.
Tony grabbed them two beers. “It’s gonna take more than a little bit of bullshit to scare us away.”
“The glitter looks great,” Sean enthused. “Honestly, I love what you did with it. It never would have occurred to me to turn it into a celebration.”
Tony’s smile was soft and sweet. The kind of look that Gabriel would never have imagined he’d wear, once upon a time. “That’s all Lucas,” he said. “He didn’t want us to be ashamed.”
With Sean’s skin only a thin layer of cotton away from his hand and the wonder and awe of his feelings cresting through him, Gabriel thought to himself that he’d never been less ashamed in his life.
If he thought Sean wouldn’t panic and freak out, he’d tell him how he felt. He wouldn’t waste a single moment; he’d tell him tonight.
“And we’re not,” Sean said, sounding just as certain as he’d ever been about anything.
“How’s the new menu item coming along?” Tony asked casually, changing the subject. “Ren mentioned you guys were working on it.”
“It’s going good,” Gabriel said. “It’s not what I expected it would be, but I think . . .” He glanced over at Sean, who was still smiling. “I think it’s better because it’s not what anyone would expect.”
“I think so too,” Sean agreed.
“You two seem to be on the same page recently . . .”
But that was all Tony got out before Sean interrupted him. “Tony, we said we’d take care of it, and we are.”
Gabriel was surprised at the vehemence in Sean’s voice. He hadn’t expected that at all. Tony clearly hadn’t either.
“Uh, okay,” Tony said. “I wasn’t saying . . .”
“Yeah, you were,” Sean said, again not letting Tony finish. “You wanted to remind us that we still need to come to an agreement over who’s going to keep the name. I know. I think about it every day, okay? I know Gabriel does, too.”
He didn’t. Not really. He thought about it every once in awhile, the ugly thought intruding in the happiness he’d found, and every time it showed up, he pushed it away, because he didn’t know how to deal with it.
He’d never known how to deal with it.
But he was not going to be stupid enough to say that, especially not now.
“Alright,” Tony said, his expression smoothing into a charming smile. “I trust you guys.”
“You should,” Sean retorted.
“Hey,” Gabe said, fingertips brushing against his back. “Come on, let’s have that dance, okay?”
“Yes,” Sean said, and his smile was back. Brighter than ever. “Let’s do that.”
They set their beers on a nearby table, and Gabriel was pleasantly surprised when Sean was the one to take him by the hand and tug him onto the makeshift dance floor.
The band that Tony had found for the night was a little more honky-tonk than they usually got, but Gabriel found himself really enjoying it, and the lead singer’s rainbow cowboy boots.
The song wasn’t particularly up-tempo, but slow enough that it felt right for Gabriel to wind his arms around Sean’s waist and pull him close, moving along to the beat. They’d been slightly more circumspect around the lot—ever since the first night, when they’d barely been able to keep their hands off each other—but there was a crowd tonight. If anyone saw them, Gabe decided he didn’t care.
“This is nice,” Sean said with a soft sigh, as his head rested on Gabriel’s shoulder. “Really nice, actually.”
“We did duck out on the six-month anniversary party early,” Gabriel pointed out. “It feels good
to celebrate that we’re still here. Still going strong.”
Sean pulled back, his eyes deep and dark in the shadows of the evening. “Better than ever,” he agreed as they moved to the music together.
It was the perfect moment—and of course Gabriel had to ruin it by opening his big fat mouth and sticking his foot in it. “Did you mean it?” he wondered, before he could stop himself.
“Mean what?” Sean asked, sliding his fingers under the hem of Gabriel’s t-shirt, making him shiver as they danced up his spine.
“That you think about it all the time?”
Sean still looked baffled.
“The name,” Gabriel said. “You told Tony you think about it all the time.”
“Oh,” Sean said. “Yeah, actually,” he added. “Sometimes I think if I could just think about it long enough, and clearly enough, I’d come up with the solution we’d both be happy with. Because . . .” He hesitated. “I don’t want to lose this.”
“I don’t want to lose it either,” Gabe said seriously.
“We’ll get there,” Sean said confidently. His entire hand pressed against the damp skin of Gabriel’s back and he tensed, then relaxed into his touch. “Fighting with you was really fun, actually, but it turns out this is more fun.”
“Orgasms usually are,” Gabe teased.
Sean’s gaze was serious. “And you give such good ones,” he said.
He was wading right into the deep end—or maybe he’d been there long enough that the shock of it had worn off already—but he leaned in and kissed Sean anyway. And Sean didn’t hesitate, he kissed him right back, their lips moving together in a woozy rush. It was hot, because kissing Sean couldn’t ever be anything else, but there was a soft sweetness to it, a lack of rushing, that warmed Gabe’s heart.
The frantic heat of the last few times they’d fucked had been glorious, but this felt even better. Not like they were just racing to the inevitable end, but like he and Sean were savoring every single moment.
Sean broke the kiss first, resting his head back on Gabe’s shoulder. They were barely swaying with the music now, but it didn’t matter. Gabriel’s heart still felt so full it might explode. “You still going with me tomorrow?” he asked.
“Of course.” Like Gabriel would let anyone else go with him. He’d already planned the restaurant supply stores they’d go to, and the really great Asian fusion place that was near one of them. They’d make a day of it. A date of it, if he had any say in the matter.
“I can’t believe I used to think you were a stubborn asshole.” Sean chuckled under his breath.
“I can’t believe you think I’m still anything else,” Gabriel retorted. It was kind of selfish asshole territory, pushing them both into this dating thing, without even telling Sean about it, especially when he’d been so clear about what he’d wanted.
But he was a grown man, wasn’t he? If he didn’t like any of it, he could pull back. He didn’t have to cuddle in closer, burrow so near that if Gabriel could tuck him inside, he would.
“You’re a lot of things, Gabriel Moretti,” Sean said quietly. “But meatballs notwithstanding, you’re anything but an asshole.”
“I could . . .” Gabriel licked his lips. It felt like such a risk, telling him now, about the name he’d picked out, about the plans he’d made, about how he’d rather cut off his own arm than take away something that Sean cared about, like he did his ex-husband.
But what if Sean was still operating under the assumption that when they figured their shit out, it was over?
Deep down, Gabriel didn’t really believe that was true. Sean had even said that what they were doing was more fun than arguing. But how long would that last?
What if he woke up one morning and knew, once and for all, that Gabriel could never fill Milo’s shoes? The same way Gabriel knew it?
Gabe couldn’t let him go, not just yet. If he did, and it ended, he was going to end up just as bitter and bereft as Ren, and that was a cautionary tale if he’d ever seen one.
“What?” Sean asked softly. “What is it?”
“Nothing,” Gabe said. “I just wanted to say I could make you pancakes tomorrow. Blueberry. If you wanted.”
“How did you know that was my favorite?” Sean sounded absolutely delighted.
“I know more than you think,” Gabriel said.
Chapter Eleven
Sean didn’t think he’d look forward to the Sunday he’d agreed to go shopping with Gabriel, but it turned out by the time Sunday morning rolled around, he wasn’t sure he wanted to even let the guy out of his sight.
Especially if he kept making him the best blueberry pancakes he’d ever tasted.
And the way he’d danced . . . and the way he’d blown him later that night when they’d come back to his townhouse. Sean shivered just thinking about how wonderful it had been.
Even more shocking was the fact that this was Gabriel. Gabriel freaking Moretti.
What would he have done, way back when, if he had known that under all his stubborn bluster, Gabriel was like this? If the guy who had thrown a meatball in his direction was also the same one who left him limp and weak-kneed each and every time they touched?
Sean wasn’t sure.
Truthfully, he didn’t feel sure about much right at the moment, except that Gabriel’s pancakes were extraordinary. But even as he sat at the breakfast bar, comfortably hip to hip with Gabe as they ate breakfast, he felt like the ground was shifting underneath him.
It felt like things were changing, and he didn’t know how or why. All he knew was that when Gabriel teased him, saying he was still an asshole, a week ago, he might have agreed and meant it. But now? He couldn’t. He just knew better.
He’d never really had just a hookup partner before, though, so maybe this was just what it felt like when you added in the friend to the friends with benefits equation. Because he knew that before, he and Gabriel had definitely not been friends. Co-workers, maybe. Verbal sparring partners, definitely. But now Sean couldn’t deny that they’d ventured into a real, genuine friendship.
He wouldn’t be voluntarily spending his day off with Gabriel if they weren’t. And he wasn’t just letting Gabriel come with him, or taking Gabriel with him because he needed the help—he was actually looking forward to spending the day with him.
“You’re quiet over there,” Gabriel said.
“Just really enjoying these pancakes,” Sean said, taking all the thoughts that were currently making him uncomfortable and shoving them in a box. He couldn’t deal with any of this right now.
Gabriel’s smile was as bright as the morning sun filtering in through Sean’s kitchen window. “Really?”
“Yeah,” Sean responded. “You’re a really good cook, you know.”
The flush went from Gabriel’s cheeks down his neck, where it disappeared under his t-shirt collar. Sean was charmed, and even vaguely turned on, even though they’d just had very satisfactory handjobs in the shower less than an hour ago.
“Thanks,” Gabriel said, standing and grabbing their plates to take to the sink. “I’m not. Not really. Just runs in the family, I guess.”
It annoyed Sean more than he wanted it to that Gabriel didn’t understand that he was naturally gifted in the kitchen. He was naturally gifted in a lot of other ways too, and he was totally confident about those. He could make Sean sob with pleasure by barely crooking a finger. But whenever Sean tried to tell him how good a cook he was, he just brushed it aside.
Maybe that was part of becoming Gabriel’s friend, he thought as he grabbed his keys and wallet, being offended on his behalf instead of just offended.
“I’ve got a whole list of places we can hit,” Gabriel said as they got in Sean’s car. “And,” he added, with a trace of that blush returning to his face, “we can grab lunch at this Asian fusion place by one of them that I think you shouldn’t miss.”
Sean couldn’t figure out why Gabriel would possibly be embarrassed about introducing him to a great new restaurant.
Maybe he was feeling a little odd about this evolution in their hookup relationship too. Friendship didn’t come naturally to everyone.
“Hey, that sounds awesome,” Sean reassured him. “I can’t wait. We just ate breakfast and I’m stuffed, but if I wasn’t, I’d want to head there first thing.”
Sean typed the address Gabe gave him into the GPS on his phone and plugged it into the car’s system.
“Really?”
“Really,” Sean said. “I mean, we’re experimenting with our own Asian fusion, aren’t we? But I’d hardly call us experts.”
“Right,” Gabriel agreed, relaxing into the seat more. “I almost forgot about that. We need to finish that recipe up today, I guess.”
“I was going to make the nuts tonight,” Sean said. “You could stay, after, and help me?”
“I’d really like that,” Gabriel said, even though Sean had been struck by a momentary worry that this was a lot of time to spend together. What if Gabe got freaked out or felt pressured? But it felt like the opposite instead, when he agreed. Like the most natural thing in the whole world.
Sean told himself to stop second-guessing everything and just enjoy it.
———
By the time they made it to the fusion place for lunch, they had a good haul in the back of Sean’s Outback. New spatulas and sauté pans for Gabriel, and he’d helped Sean pick out a new-to-him flat-top grill that he could install and plug in right where he’d had the original, bulky press that had been fine for starting out, but was severely limiting him now.
As they walked into the cute little hole-in-the-wall place, Sean’s mind was racing with all the new things he could add to the menu, now that he had the ability to make them.
“Hey, Moretti!” An Asian guy with a nose ring and a shock of blue mohawked hair came around the corner and greeted Gabe with enthusiasm. “It’s been ages since we’ve seen you around here.”
“Yeah,” Gabe said, falling into the hug like it was second nature. Sean hung back a little, awkward because he hadn’t realized that Gabe was such good friends with the guy who ran the place.
