He swallowed his coffee wrong and almost choked. “Li Mei?”
“I saw some memories,” I said.
“Shit.” He flushed. “That might be embarrassing. I was such a kid.”
“No.” I impulsively sprung up to kiss him. “You were sweet.”
He looked at me for a moment and then he took my hands and squeezed them tightly. “What did you remember?”
“Have a seat,” I said, as he handed me the plate, and for the next half an hour I was able to give Jie something I could tell he had yearned for all these years: reminiscing over old times with the girl he loved. He cut in frequently to tell me his own side of things.
“It was terrible,” he said. “I thought you were so pretty, and too good for me, but I had only just been turned and I wanted to drain every drop of blood out of you…” “I was always fighting with Rayner but I worried he might kick me out of the clan. Seems funny now. He wouldn’t have kicked me out. Even when he’s an ass, he’s a loyal ass.” “…but he was pissed at me after that, yeah, he definitely knew we had sex. He took me into the cargo hold and beat the shit out of me.”
“What!?”
“No, it was the right thing to do,” Jie said. “A clan leader has to maintain hierarchy. I had agreed to the terms and I broke my oath over you.”
“I will never understand vampires…”
“You’re already starting to understand vampires,” Jie said. “You saw what happened to Alice. If she had a sire like Rayner, he would never let her run around alone, get involved with sketchy thralls, and for damn sure, he wouldn’t let her have any drugs. It’s a two way street. If we don’t learn discipline, we end up dead. I was thinking about taking you and running away. Neither of us would have survived that, Plum.”
“It still seems…brutal. I loved you, not him.”
“I shouldn’t have usurped him. We’re a clan first. Well, you come first, but only if we all understand what you mean to each other. You were still Rayner’s wife first. And you were my wife before you were Thom’s.”
“What if I had never loved Rayner or Silvus?”
“It’s never happened,” he said. “And I guess it never will, will it? This is our last chance.”
Since Jie seemed the most modern and easygoing of all the vampires, it sounded especially strange to hear this moral code coming out of his mouth, unmovable as stone. They were a clan and I was Lisbeth, Meg, Li Mei and Bertie, in that order. As soon as I thought of it like that, I felt trapped again, even if I loved them. The love I felt for them would always be imprisoned by all the people I had been before—each of them, in turn, trapped in their own love by the legacy of Lisbeth and Rayner.
We were interrupted by Silvus, who walked in and gave me a pointed and almost stern look as he set his coffee on the table between us. “Jie,” he said. “We have to get to the airport. Thom wanted me to tell you the shower is free.”
“Great. Shit, is it already eight?” He left the booth.
Jie didn’t seem bothered, but I was slightly unnerved by the dominant air around Silvus. He sat down and his eyes said many things before he spoke.
“Remember what I told you, pet,” he said. “I don’t think you should look to your memories.”
“You’re scaring me, Silvus.”
He was unflinching. “I’m afraid I need to scare you.”
“But…”
“I beg you,” he said. “The past must stay past or it’s only a matter of time before you turn over stones best left alone.”
A shiver went through me.
Chapter Nineteen
Alissa
We settled into our seats on the airplane. I had the window with Jie and Thom beside me and Rayner and Silvus were on the other side of the aisle with an empty seat between them. I felt a little nauseated and the plane was still boarding. I knew witches didn’t deal well with airplanes, and I’m sure I had some normal human nerves too. I could hardly believe this thing could propel us over the ocean. My village was located in a spot where we didn’t even see planes overhead very often. The battered old books we passed around were often written before airplanes were common—or even invented. Every beep and thump and rumble made me jump.
Judging by how pale Silvus and Rayner looked, it was obvious I wasn’t the only one. And Thom’s leg was wiggling restlessly.
Jie was looking at a guidebook. “Once in a while…I would kill to eat,” he said.
“I’d kill to eat,” Thom said, staring at the man who was standing in front of him trying to jam his luggage in the overhead compartment. His shirt was riding up and his stomach was nearly in Thom’s face. “Right now.”
“Beef tendon noodle soup…”
“You still miss food?” Rayner muttered.
“How can you not miss food?” Thom shot back a little too loudly. But the sound of the plane engines was loud enough to muffle them.
“This is a full flight,” the attendant broke in over a loud intercom. “Please keep smaller bags under your seat and do not overcrowd the bins. If your bags don’t fit please give them to a flight attendant to check.”
The plane was almost full now as a few more stragglers jammed into the stray seats, except for the one between Rayner and Silvus.
And then suddenly a small figure in large sunglasses came running down the aisle. She was wearing a black jacket with dangly leather fringe and shoulder pads that would be noticeable from a mile away, and saying to the flight attendants, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…thank you for waiting, aren’t you sweet…”
Apparently Alice had booked the last seat. She gave me a tiny, feeble wave. She had a small bag with her and stood in front of Rayner with her hands on her hips.
“What the hell are you doing here?” he asked. “And this is the outfit you thought you should wear?”
“The Jon-Benet collection was on clearance?” Jie sputtered with laughter.
“I’m going to Hawaii! I was tryin’ to wear something fun!” she said, sounding anguished as she looked at her outfit. “Never you mind the rest!”
“You can get by me.”
“I’m not crawling over your knees.”
He unbuckled his seatbelt and stood up to let her in. She slumped into the seat and said, “Ulf is dead.”
“Who the fuck killed Ulf?” Thom yelled.
“Ah—“ Rayner tensed. “I know. He told me.”
“Ulf is dead?” I asked. “Oh…no.”
“He told you!? He didn’t tell anyone!” Alice cried.
“He couldn’t,” Rayner said. “You would have all begged him not to do it and he would have struggled. But he’s earned it. Ancient vampires have to confide these things in each other. At some point you will understand.” He handed her a handkerchief.
“Thank you…” She sniffled into it. “Well, I had to get out of Savannah. I can’t handle the funeral.”
“Poor Ulf!” I had not really remembered Li Mei’s encounter with Ulf, and I only met him briefly, but I was still shocked and sad. “What will all the other vampires do?”
“The timing is unfortunate,” Rayner said, “but he planned it a long time ago. We must respect his wishes. Ancient vampires usually tell very few people they are leaving for this reason. He told his clan.”
“Why did he tell you?” Jie asked.
Rayner waved like, We have to discuss this later.
“We’re going to Hawaii to try and find Alissa’s old bones,” Silvus said. “It’s not a pleasure trip. I don’t think we’ll be much fun to hang out with.”
“I think that sounds fine,” Alice said. “I just need a purpose. You can use me if you need to, to talk to people. I can be very cute.”
“Just don’t get us into trouble,” Rayner said. He and Silvus exchanged a quick look that suggested they fully expected trouble.
“I’m glad you’re here,” I said. “And I’m not the only girl.” I was getting that protective, sisterly feeling again that made me feel so much more like myself. But…poor Ulf. I
wondered what would happen to that beautiful house, and all the vampires who had danced the night away there.
Chapter Twenty
Alissa
The plane ride made me thoroughly queasy but I managed to keep my breakfast down. The flight was almost eleven hours, but it was still just mid-afternoon when we arrived and the sun was shining on the most beautiful landscape I could imagine, with lush green forest and sparkling beaches.
I had never heard of time zones before. They didn’t teach us anything about travel in school, of course. No one ever expected a girl of the Order would be flying to Hawaii.
The mood in the airport, the rental car desk, and in our hotel was all sunshine and happiness, because everyone here was on vacation to relax, and that was another foreign concept to me. Vacation! To relax! At the beach!
“You’re like a little kid at Disneyland,” Thom said, grinning. “But we sure need to get you a bikini as soon as possible.”
“Ooh yes!” Alice said. “We sure do!”
“You’re getting a one-piece and you’re not going to drink anyone’s blood,” Thom said. “You little troublemaker.” He grinned and ruffled her hair.
“As long as you’ll pay for it, Mr. Whitman,” she said.
“I don’t know how you always manage to make my own name sound like you’re mocking me,” Thom said. “I’ll buy you whatever you want as long as you stay well out of my way when I want Alissa all to myself. Warm weather makes me want to do wicked things.”
I knew what he meant. Warm weather, sea breezes…the idea of wearing a bikini sounded scandalously delicious.
“Shh,” Silvus said, as Rayner was trying to check in.
I could already tell Hawaii was going to be different. Magical. A place where I could spread my wings a little. It didn’t belong to anyone. The vampires had never been here before.
But strangely enough, I have been, I realized. I lived here once…in the late 1600s or so. Maybe that was why the land made me feel happy, although everyone else seemed to agree.
Jie was grabbing up brochures. “Everybody’s going surfing…”
“We have to find this witch first,” Silvus said. “If we get it done quickly, then you can do what you like.”
Silvus was serious. Once we were checked in we went right out the doors again to find the witch. We drove past some hotels bunched together that faced the ocean but we were staying at a resort with a quiet beach surrounded by some houses.
“The magical community here is very small,” Silvus said. “They aren’t members of the council, but just keep to their own traditions. So I don’t know how welcoming this witch will be, but…this should be the house. Alissa…can you come with me? I expect she will want to see you. The rest of you should wait here. I don’t want a crowd at her door.”
Silvus and I went to the door together, walking through a lovely garden that reminded me of every other witches’ garden, only adapted to this climate. Instead of the sharp, hearty, and bitter herbs and fruits of winter, this was a place of sweet, fertile plants. A breeze kept tossing Silvus’ hair into his eyes as he looked around, but the screened porch was sheltered and a variety of wind chimes sang out while a cat roamed the stone paths around the yard, blinking at us without much interest.
I liked the house very much, so I was a little shocked when the woman who peered out at us was short, round, and scowling, her graying hair pulled back into a tight bun. “Who are you!?”
“I’m Silvus.”
“I don’t want anything to do with you.”
“You can tell what I am, then? I’m not here for trouble. Just on behalf of this young woman.”
“I can’t imagine what you want that isn’t trouble!” she said.
“We’ll repay you—“
“I don’t need anything!”
“Can we talk, at least?”
“Nope.” She shut the door and then all the blinds.
“Well. Someone isn’t charmed by an English accent,” Silvus said.
“Please!” I cried. “I’m just a witch. I used to live on these islands and—I need to find something here. I came all this way. I escaped the Order of the Blessed and they’re still looking for me if I can’t—“
The door opened again and the woman pulled me inside the house, slamming it on Silvus again. “The Order of the Blessed?” she said. “Oh, yes. I’ve heard about them.”
“I grew up there and they’re looking for me, but I have a chance to mess up their plans.” I told her about the Blessed Thrall and the spell, breathless at first but then finding my footing. I started to feel calmer. Maybe some sense was awakening in me of the network of witches all around the world who quietly practiced magic with the rhythms of forests and seas. The house looked very different from my mother’s house. The pale, calm tones and simple decor, the windows that opened to the sea…the vibe was expansive and peaceful instead of tight and cozy and rugged. But I could feel the very same energy of magic, practiced with skill and intuition.
“You’re looking for your 17th century bones?”
“Is there any chance they still exist?”
“If your ancestors had any idea that you had a magical gift in you, they might have saved your bones and passed them through the generations. We used to save the bones of chieftains, but most of them have since been lost or destroyed.”
“I was probably human in my past life. Not a witch.”
“Here in Hawaii, like almost all places in the world before they became so-called civilized, we didn’t see as much of a difference. The humans and witches would have been aware of each other and the witches would have told your people that you had powerful mana—if we can assume that you did.”
“How do I find out?”
“The best person to find them is you,” she said. She sighed a little. “I didn’t want to get mixed up in all of this, but you look at me like a cute little stray cat.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to!” I tried to smile a little more.
“No, that’s worse,” she said.
I wondered if I could put her in danger, or others along the way, like Paola.
“Come with me. We’ll go to the water. You said you have a clan familiar who is a whale? He can help you. Let’s read the waves and see if they will give us an answer. But those demons out there are not getting near me.”
“I fully respect your wishes,” I said. “I think Silvus understands that this is a matter between witches.”
We exited out the back of the small house and faced the sea, walking down some worn wooden steps all the way to where the water ran toward our toes.
“My name is Keao,” the woman said as we walked. “I forgot to give it to you. Not that I want you using it. I don’t think a long acquaintance with you will bring much but trouble.” The old woman seemed more curmudgeonly than anything.
“I’m Alissa. Don’t worry. I certainly hope I won’t bother you again.”
“Summon that familiar of yours.”
“Waldemar?” I called.
He appeared several feet away, knee-deep in waves. He was still fully dressed in a dark wool suit, but he didn’t seem bothered by his clothes getting wet. He looked like I dragged him out of bed. “Yes?”
“I’m sorry. Were you in the middle of something?”
“I’m your familiar. It doesn’t matter.”
“This is Keao.”
“Hi.” His tone was always between bored and sarcastic. “How may I serve you?”
“Are you sure he’s a familiar and not a reluctant genie?” Keao asked.
“He doesn’t like people,” I said. “He’s very old.”
“You’re a bad familiar,” Keao said, pointing at him, and I feared I was now about to see a Curmudgeon vs. Hermit brawl. “Your witch needs to trust you completely and know she can call you anytime, and I don’t care how old you are!”
He rubbed his temples. “Of course she can call me anytime. But when I was young, it was very bad form to speak to another witc
hes’ familiar. I do wonder whatever happened to that.”
“It’s okay, Waldemar,” I said. “Keao says I just need your help to cast one spell to find my old bones and then you can get back to whatever—“
“Don’t apologize to your familiar. I would smack him if he was mine,” Keao said.
“Whoa!” Waldemar said.
“I would never smack anyone!” I said. Silvus didn’t seem very happy with him either and I didn’t like that they wanted to treat Waldemar like a slave. Truthfully, there were many times when I wished I could just be grumpy and blunt like Waldemar was all the time and as soon as the thought hit me I wondered if familiars could absorb all the feelings their witches couldn’t feel.
“Let’s just focus on the task,” I said. “Is there anything special I should do?”
“I will lend you what magic I can,” Keao said. “I sense that you are not very experienced. All you need to do is clasp hands and ask this land if it knows you. Ask it to show you the way. The rest depends on your own will and memory.”
That didn’t sound too difficult. Waldemar offered me his hands and we stood together, his feet in the water and mine still mostly on the land—but right on the edge. I immediately sensed that we were making a link between land and water so we could search all of the islands.
I still missed my wand that Father Joshua had kept from me, but having Waldemar here was nearly as good. The thing about a wand was that it was all mine, an instrument for my will. Waldemar had a will of his own, but he could also bring me in touch with deeper forces from the magical world that I couldn’t connect with as well on my own.
Keao put a hand on my back and whispered her own spell of support to me, and I breathed patiently and let my mind flow with the water.
Who am I?
Where am I?
The waves sang back to me. At first I couldn’t understand them, but I kept asking and reaching. I had to make myself be patient and let the connection between myself and the land unfold. Luckily I had learned a lot of patience in my childhood. Maybe the Order taught me the skills of a witch without even meaning to.
Love Me Madly Page 15
