by Elle Casey
Candi pushed the visor back up. “As if,” she mumbled under her breath. It’s my stupid hair. I can do whatever I want with it. “I’ll be right back,” she said, getting out of the car on impulse before Jonathan could pull out of the parking space and jogging over to the drugstore that was next to the copy shop. She ignored the yelling out the window coming from Kevin and Jonathan.
Candi quickly cruised the aisles looking for scissors and hair dye. I’m not just going to cut it; I’m going red, too. She’d always wondered what she’d look like as a redhead, and nobody was going to stop her from doing whatever the heck she wanted with her hair. She studied the color swatches on the shelves and the boxes, finally picking one that looked like a deep reddish-brown. She bought two boxes, not sure how much of the dye it would take to get her blonde hair the right shade.
The cashier rang up her purchases without a word, more worried about the text message waiting for her on her phone than customer service. Candi paid with cash and left the store with her plastic bag swinging at her hip. She was proud of herself, taking her destiny and safety into her own hands. No one would be able to identify her when she was done. No more blonde-haired girl with dreadlocks for the police or FBI to track down. When she saw this old lady who owned the cabin, she was going to be a short-haired, normal-looking redhead.
***
Jonathan was afraid to wake Sarah up. He’d heard Candi in the bathroom banging around for a while, but she’d been quiet for way too long. Then a few cusswords came out from behind the door.
Xena lifted her head off her paw once, but then went back to sleep. The smaller dog, James, had taken up a position just outside the bathroom door, practically leaning on it in his desire to be near Candi.
Kevin and Sarah were both sound asleep on separate beds. Kevin had checked them into the sleeziest motel room Jonathan had ever seen, using his charm on the heavily made-up woman at the desk to avoid having to give his identification. It was an hourly rental type place, so it probably hadn’t taken much to convince her.
As soon as he laid eyes on the room, Jonathan knew they’d be sleeping with all kinds of bacteria and maybe even lice or bed bugs. He’d insisted on spraying the entire room down with a can of disinfectant he purchased in the store down the street before allowing Sarah to go inside, and he did a thorough check of the mattress for bugs. The windows were open now to let some of the smell out. Even with the disinfectant soaked into every crevice of the room, the rancid odor of old cigarette smoke and nicotine would never leave; they were just going to have to deal with it for one night.
Jonathan walked up to the bathroom door and tapped on it lightly. “Are you okay in there?”
“No, I’m not, thank you very much,” came Candi’s annoyed voice from inside.
“Anything I can do to help?”
“Yeah.” The door flew open. “You can go get a razor to shave my head with.”
Jonathan stood there, staring at the girl who was supposed to be his sister. He blinked several times to clear his retinas of the misinformation they were sending through his optic nerve to his brain.
“Stop blinking at me like that and say something.”
“Uhhh … uhhhh … that is such an … interesting color. It reminds me of Mars.”
“Eerrrrrhhh!” yelled Candi, slamming the door in his face.
“I like the color of Mars,” said Jonathan to the particle board that was inches from his nose now. “Kind of a reddish-orangish-brownish.”
“What’s going on?” mumbled Sarah from the bed.
Jonathan strolled over, in no hurry to unleash the fury that would be Sarah realizing Candi had taken hair matters into her own hands.
Sarah sat up, running her fingers under her eyes. “I heard Candi yelling. Is she mad about something?”
“Maybe,” said Jonathan, sitting down and taking Sarah’s exposed foot in his lap. She liked massages. He was thinking maybe she wouldn’t go so bananas over his sister’s hair if she had nice happy feet to walk around on.
Sarah squinted at him. “What are you hiding?”
He widened his eyes trying to look innocent. “Who? Me? Nothing. Nothing at all. I’m just sitting her rubbing your feet with zero ulterior motives.”
Sarah pushed him off and stood up. “Liar liar pants too long in the dryer and now they’re squeezing your hacky sack. What’s Sugar Lump hiding from me?” She walked over to the bathroom, knocking on the door with a knuckle. “Hey! Sugar Lump! Let me in.”
“No! Go away!”
“No can do, Scooby Doo. Open it, or I’ll have one of my bouncers take it down.”
“I can’t,” came a weepy voice from inside.
“What do you mean you can’t? Is it broken?”
“No. There’s nothing wrong with the door.”
“What is it then? Come on … pregnant lady’s gotta pee.”
“Go in the sink.”
Sarah laughed. “I’m not going to pee in the sink. Seriously, what’s wrong with you?” Sarah looked over at Jonathan and ran her finger in a circle around her ear.
Jonathan shook his head. His sister wasn’t crazy, but her hair sure looked it.
“It’s my hair.”
“What’s wrong with your hair? I can help you, just let me in.”
“There’s no helping this horror show. It’s over. I’m going to have to shave it down to nothing.”
“You’ve got five seconds, Sugar Lump.”
Jonathan could tell Sarah was serious now. Apparently, so could Candi, because the door creaked open slowly. And as more and more of Candi was revealed, the more shocked Sarah’s expression became.
Sarah said in an awed voice, “Holy Mexican jumping beans, what in the hellsbells did you do to your hair?”
“I cut it. And I dyed it Midsummer Night’s Dream Red.”
Sarah just shook her head. “Oh, no you did not, young lady. You massacred it, and dyed it bleeding carrot red.” She grabbed Candi’s arm and pulled her out to face the big mirror. She talked to the reflection of them both. “All my hard work. Hours of dreading, of fixing, styling, slaving over a hot head of frizzy hair … and now this.”
“I know!” wailed Candi. “I’m so ugly, Kevin’s going to break up with me as soon as he sees me!” She dropped her face into her hands, crying for real now.
Kevin sat up, looking around, disoriented. “What? Who’s ugly?”
Jonathan said nothing. He just pointed.
Kevin scooted forward on the bed so he could see what Jonathan was gesturing at. A second later, he snorted.
Candi whipped around, dropping her hands to her sides. “Don’t laugh!” she screeched.
Kevin broke out into loud guffaws, rolling over sideways on the bed and falling onto the floor when he ran out of mattress.
Candi shrieked in frustration and ran back into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind her.
“Hey! I have to pee!” yelled Sarah, banging on the door.
Candi yanked the door open, grabbed Sarah’s arm, and pulled her inside, shutting the door behind both of them.
Jonathan could hear echoing voices from within. Candi was whining and moaning, and Sarah was first trying to sooth her and then just yelling at her to shut up and stop complaining. He smiled to himself. Sarah’s particular brand of tough love was usually quite effective. He had no doubt that she’d fix Candi’s hair as much as it was fixable at this point. He looked down at Kevin who was wiping the tears from his eyes as he crawled back up on the bed.
“Are you going to break up with her?” Jonathan asked, worried about his sister dealing with a broken heart along with all this other stress.
Kevin frowned at him and laughed once before answering. “Are you kidding? Hell no, I’m not going to dump her. She looks like Strawberry Shortcake. Do you have any idea how much of a crush I had on that stupid character when I was a little kid?” He sighed as he flopped back onto the bed. “My mom had these dolls in plastic containers in her closet from when she
was younger, and one of them had this reddish pink hair that smelled like strawberries. I thought she was so pretty when I was, like, five or whatever.”
“I’d say Candi’s hair is more rusty red than pink.”
“Meh. Rusty red … pink … it’s all the same to me. Hilarious and cute.” He swiveled his head to look at Jonathan. “Dude, she could shave her head bald, and I’d still want to be with her, you know?”
“Yeah. I know.” Jonathan had the same emotional ties to Sarah.
“I never felt that way about a girl before. I used to like a girl just for that stuff - looks and shit. Now,” he shrugged, “doesn’t seem like it even matters.” He pointed at Jonathan. “Don’t tell her I said that, though. I don’t want her to let herself go or anything.”
“But I thought you said it didn’t matter what she looked like.”
“Dude, it’s not about looks. It’s about personal pride. I need to be with the Candi who feels good about herself, proud, confident … you know? I don’t want some depressed mopey girl for a girlfriend.”
“Oh, okay … I see what you mean. So as long as she’s confident, she can be ugly.”
“Did Kevin just say I’m ugly?” whispered Candi from the open doorway. Jonathan could hear the sounds of Sarah using the bathroom in the background.
“Close the door, would ya?!” Sarah yelled.
“No! Kevin didn’t say that!” said Jonathan in a panic.
“Then why did you say that?!”
“Way to go, Jon,” admonished Kevin, jumping off the bed to join Candi. “Babe, I didn’t say that. I said, if you were ugly I’d still want you to be my girlfriend.”
“Liar! You said I’m ugly!” she yelled, going back into the bathroom and locking it before Kevin could get there to cut her off. He tripped over the dog in his efforts and stumbled to the floor just outside the door.
He looked over at Jonathan after reaching up and unsuccessfully trying the handle. “Way to go, genius.”
“What? What’d I do?” Jonathan sat on the edge of the bed, feeling like a fish out of water. This sensation was nothing new when it came to either of those girls, but it was still frustrating.
He shook his head after watching Kevin try to cajole his way into the bathroom and the heart of his sister for five straight minutes with no success. “This is totally not my fault,” mumbled Jonathan to himself as he pulled back the covers and climbed into the bed that Sarah had vacated.
He fell asleep before Kevin got into the bathroom. His dreams were filled with pink-haired aliens from Mars and angry girlfriends threatening to shave his head.
Chapter Five
Home Sweet Home
KEVIN WAS THE FIRST ONE awake. He took the dogs out for a walk, relieved to find they were both housebroken and that there was no dog crap to clean up in the room - not that it would have mattered in that place. The smell probably would have blended right in.
He got back in time to take a hot shower before everyone got up. When he was done he put his dirty clothes back on and went out into the room to join the others. He used every ounce of willpower not to bust a gut at Candi’s hair when she sat up.
She eyed him carefully. “I can see you laughing inside your head, Kevin.”
He sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled her into his arms. “Listen, Gumdrop. Sarah fixed it up nice. You look cute, so stop worrying.”
“That extra box of dye helped, but I’m still a long way from being fixed. I look like that Shirley Temple girl.”
“I have no idea who you’re talking about, but she must be hot because I know you are.” He laid a loud, juicy kiss on her unresponsive lips. “Better pucker up, Gumdrop, or I’m gonna have to tackle you and force you to kiss me back.”
She smiled hesitantly. “Are you being serious? Do you really think it’s not awful?”
He stood and pulled her to her feet. “I really think it’s not awful, I promise. It’s all good. Now hurry up and get ready. We need to go if we’re going to eat and get there on time to pay that lady.”
“What time is it?” groaned Sarah from the other bed.
“Five. Get up. There’s an IHOP down the street, and I can already smell the pancakes and sausage and bacon and pies and milkshakes …”
Sarah jumped out of bed and raced to the bathroom faster than he’d ever seen her move. When he heard the sounds of vomiting coming from around the corner he knew why. “Oh boy. Sorry about that.” He grabbed the leashes off the dresser and hooked the dogs up again. “I’m going to wait outside. See you guys in five. Don’t forget the money.”
He escaped as fast as he could without being rude about it. He loved his sister and all, but that morning sickness was just plain gross. Someday if his wife ever had a kid, he’d be there for her; but until then, he was going to leave the managing of Sarah to Jonathan. He was much better-suited to it anyway. The science behind it gave him all kinds of stuff to think about and calculate. The kid was only happy when he was reciting factoids, and this pregnancy was a bottomless well of data for him.
Kevin stood on the sidewalk absently watching the dogs goof around and the early-morning traffic using the road. A police car cruising by slowly caught his attention, the cop behind the wheel staring at him for a few long seconds. It made Kevin wish he’d stayed inside the room. He tried to turn to the side casually so he wouldn’t be so recognizable. After waiting for the car to pass, he walked over and stuck his head inside the door to the room. “Let’s go,” he said loudly, seeing only Candi standing in between the beds, brushing her teeth. “There are cops cruising around, and one of them just looked at me.”
Less than a minute later they were all piling into the car in a panic, the dogs jumping in along with them. “Are we going to the IHOP?” Candi asked from the driver’s seat, scooting it forward so she could reach the pedals.
Sarah groaned.
“No. Go to a McDs or something, the drive-through. We can’t afford to sit around where we’ll be seen,” said Kevin. Seeing that cop staring at him had freaked him out. He just wanted to get to that cabin and settle in, and the first thing he was going to do was train the big dog to kick some ass. Hopefully that assbag owner who’d had her before hadn’t beaten her protective instincts out of her along with everything else.
“Should we go through with all of us in the car?” asked Candi.
“Yes, I think we’ll be okay, said Jonathan. “Fast food establishments are usually staffed by teenagers, and that’s the age group with the fewest amount of viewers of the news. I think we should just get to the cabin as soon as possible.”
Kevin held up his fist for a bump which Jonathan returned in confusion.
Candi pulled out onto the road and went two blocks before locating their breakfast stop. They asked for a few extra empty sacks which Sarah ended up using as barf bags in response to the smells from the greasy food. Candi gulped down her breakfast burritos as fast as she could.
“I’m sorry, Sarah,” said Jonathan. “When we stop for lunch, we’ll eat outside the car.”
Kevin glanced back to see her waving weakly at them from her spot in the passenger seat, her head resting on the open window frame. “Don’t worry about it. I’m feeling better. I just wish I had a cracker or something.”
“Fry?” asked Kevin, holding up a limp strip of potato in between the front seats.
Sarah took it out of his hand and ate it. “Thanks. That’s good.”
“If you can’t keep food down we’re going to have to bring you to a hospital,” Jonathan said worriedly.
“I’ll be fine. It’s just really bad in the morning. The problem is I feel like I’m sick because I have an empty stomach, but at the same time, all that food just smells so disgusting I can’t imagine eating it.”
“So you’re basically screwed,” said Kevin. “If you can eat fries, though, we can get more.”
“She needs a balanced diet,” said Jonathan.
“Yeah, but if all she can eat is fries, I’m buying her f
ries. It won’t kill her for a few weeks to be on a potato diet.”
“We don’t need to figure this out now,” said Candi, diplomatically. “We just need to get settled. I’ll bet once we have a routine and a normal bed to sleep in, everything will be just fine. I bought a recipe book, so we’re all set with home-cooked meals.”
“Assuming someone knows how to use the thing,” said Sarah, the wind out the window taking away some of the volume from her words.
“I know how to cook. My mom’s been teaching me and Jonathan for years.”
“Good. Maybe you can teach me.”
“Yeah,” said Kevin in a soft voice. “Please. Or she may do the Russian guy’s job for him by poisoning us all.” Kevin hunched over, leaning forward to try and escape the punishment he knew was coming.
Sarah pulled her head in the window and reached forward to flick her brother on the back of the ear, missing and hitting just air. “I’m nauseous, not deaf, idiot.” She sat back, putting her face to the window again.
Kevin stayed leaning forward for the next five minutes until they were back on the highway and Sarah was asleep. He never could tell when she was going to start feeling better again, and she never forgot a missed ear flick. He was safer staying out of reach while she was conscious.
***
“I’m totally starving,” said Sarah.
“I thought you were sick,” said Candi, looking at her in the rearview mirror.
“Whatever morning sickness I had before has now been replaced with a gigantic hole in my stomach that needs food in it, stat. Pull into that rest stop, Sugar Lump.”
“But Kevin said no rest stops before.”
“I don’t give flying fudge brownie what Kevin said, I have to get some food. I’ll go in and out really quick - like lightning fast, I promise.”
Candi looked at the sleeping forms of her brother and boyfriend, deciding that she could deal with their anger if she had to. If Sarah didn’t eat some real food and fast she was probably going to get sick all over again, and that wouldn’t be good for anyone.
“Okay,” said Candi, putting on the turn signal. “I’m going to park way over here behind this big truck. You put your hair in a pony tail, and put that hat on and these sunglasses.” She took the FBI-issue pair off her face and handed them back to Sarah. “Don’t talk to anyone, and don’t make eye contact. Keep your head down and hurry up. If I see anyone like a cop taking you out in handcuffs or whatever, I’m going to leave you behind, you got it?”
