Embracing Today, a firefighter romance: (The Trading Yesterday Series, #3)

by Kahlen Aymes

  It didn’t matter to me that I was only wearing boxer briefs and a t-shirt. It was late and my neighbors would be sleeping. I moved through the house to the back door off of the kitchen and pushed it open, turning on the porch light; it was so late that I wasn’t worried about my lack of attire. I moved gingerly down the steps and sat Gem in the dew dampened grass. She was so small that the grass came up to her belly and she had a hard time navigating through it.

  “Man, I guess I need to mow,” I muttered to myself. Soon she was walking around, turning circles until she found a place to do her business.

  When she was finished, she looked up at me and then waddled the short distance back to me. Before I could even bend to pick her up, she had laid down in a little ball, then rested her head on my foot, clearly intent on sleeping where she was.

  My heart melted. “Awww,” I said, and bending, I picked up the black ball of fur and nestled her against me with one hand as I went back inside. If I wasn’t careful, I’d become attached and then where would I be? I couldn’t have a dog because of all of the time I spent at the firehouse, but this precious little thing sure made me long for one.

  After I’d poured a little milk in a saucer and heated it slightly in the microwave, Gem was soon lapping it up happily. “Is that good, sweet face?”

  My bedroom was upstairs, and the house was dark, so I scooped her up and returned to it. I yawned, contemplating how the puppy’s owner was doing in the hospital. I hoped she’d at least be able to sleep.

  I placed the pup back in her kennel and she started crying before I even had the door closed. Sighing, I gave into the inevitable and was soon back in my bed with the puppy sleeping contentedly on my chest as I petted her in a slow rhythmic motion. I mean, if I wanted any sleep at all, what choice did I have?

  I smiled into the darkness as my hand stroked back and forth over the silky black fur. Yeah, it was the least I could do for the beautiful young woman who’d probably just lost the love of her life. This little dog was all she had to come home to; I reasoned, feeling sad that we hadn’t been able to save the man.

  The woman’s heartbreaking sobs still rang through my mind, as did her smoke smudged and tear stained face. I took my job seriously, and tonight was a particularly grizzly scene. I tried to remain impartial, but this… was worse than most. I could only imagine what it had been like for her to watch the man she loved burn to death. His screams must have been horrific. I’d witnessed something similar once and it still made me cringe to think about it.

  I inhaled a sigh of regret as the dog shifted on my chest and smacked her lips a couple of times the way dogs do when they are content and snuggling in for a long night’s sleep. I was loving every minute of my time with little Gem and I had to admit, having her with me tonight was nice. I was also looking forward to checking on her owner in the morning… as soon as it would be acceptable to do so. She’d just lost someone dear to her, but something deep inside me longed to know her better… The caveman inside me roared. I felt protective of the frail, broken young woman. I wasn’t sure if it was because I’d failed to rescue her partner, or if it was another deeper connection that would have stirred regardless of how we might have met. It struck me that, somehow, she would be a big part of my future.

  MARIN

  I was looking forward to getting out of the hospital. The house would be empty; a screaming reminder of what had happened, but then, so was being in the hospital. The horrific image and sounds of Carter burning would haunt me forever. It was awful.

  My injuries from the night before were relatively minor, though I’d been given IV fluids and some type of medication to sleep. They discovered two cracked ribs from one of my scuffles with Carter. I tried to hide it, but I’d winced during the initial examination, so they’d ordered x-rays. Hiding any injury had become such a habit over the past months, it hadn’t occurred to me that without Carter around to threaten more abuse, it wasn’t necessary to lie about it.

  The physician, who self-proclaimed himself the hospitalist, visited around 6 AM. I’d been anxious to leave ever since, as the gravity of the situation hit me. I was totally alone in the world but at least I had the ranch, the horses, and my little baby dog. Carter was a bastard, but at least he was someone to go home to. I was so devastated after Uncle Leonard died, I was ignorant to Carter’s motives.

  I sucked in a deep breath, shaking my head in an effort to rid my mind of such thoughts. As the television droned in the background, I wondered what needed to be done about Carter’s funeral and how to find his family. I didn’t have time to feel sorry for myself. Thankfully, Uncle Leonard’s life insurance had a nice payout though I hadn’t touched a cent of it. I would be able take my time and find a job I really wanted, and I’d have the money to cover the funeral.

  Maybe I’d go to back to school for my MBA. I hadn’t done so before because it was just assumed that I’d keep working at the shop as the business manager. Uncle Leonard taught me the billing duties when I was sixteen, so I had some practical experience that I could build on. My uncle loved having me involved and I wanted to make him happy.

  The pert young nurse who had worked the overnight shift popped her head into my room. She was dressed in the hospital RN uniform of monotone dark blue pants, top and long-sleeved jacket. The employees wore color-coded uniforms to easily distinguish their role in the hospital.

  “You’ve been cleared to get out of here, Marin. The discharge papers have been signed so you’re good to go! Do you need help getting dressed?” She smiled her encouragement.

  “Um…” I hesitated. “I don’t really have anything to wear home. I just have the clothes I came in here with and some of them were cut off in the emergency room. Is there a gift shop?”

  She looked at me sympathetically. “Sure,” she said. “If you want to dress like you’re sixty and spend a boat load of money to do it. Those ER doctors just get down to business after an accident without thinking about stuff like that. Thankfully, you weren’t hurt too badly.”

  I glanced at the white board on the wall to recall her name; Gina. “It’s understandable how they do it,” I answered, though I was worried. I couldn’t go home in a hospital gown.

  “Do you have anyone I can call to get you some clothes or to pick you up?” Obviously, she’d noticed I didn’t have any visitors during my brief stay.

  “I don’t have anyone. I spend most of my time with my animals, and our place is out in the country. Growing up, I pretty much kept to myself.” I’d had one or two high school friends, but they’d left Jackson Hole after graduation and never returned except an occasional holiday. I knew some of our neighbors, but they were more friends of Uncle Leonard than of mine. I ran a hand through my still dirty hair, realizing how gross it felt. “It sounds pretty pathetic, doesn’t it?” Tears blurred my vision and began to sting my eyes.

  “Not at all. I love animals, too. I have a dog, and three cats.”

  “I have a few horses and a new puppy.” Thinking about Gem crying from her kennel when I was calling 911 and how I had to leave her there, hurt my heart and made me anxious. I hoped the fireman who had volunteered to take care of her was good to her. He seemed like he had a big heart and a certainly had a kind face. I could tell he was handsome, despite the soot that was smudged all over it.

  “I was very sorry to hear about your boyfriend,” Gina said softly, coming into the room now.

  “Thank you,” I wiped at my eyes. I wanted to tell her that I was actually relieved, but guilt stopped me short.

  “I get off in about an hour and I could run home and get you something to wear. You can borrow something of mine… we look about the same size. And then I could take you home, if you like.”

  “Really? That would be amazing and very kind, thank you.” I dabbed at my eyes. She seemed close to my age and I felt a pang that she was so established in her life and I wasn’t.

  Gina smiled warmly. “It’s my pleasure. I’ll let my replacement know you’re waiting for m
e to come back during our shift change.”

  “Thank you, Gina. I really appreciate it.”

  As she was leaving, a large masculine frame appeared in the doorway, hovering.

  “Hey,” he said gently. I recognized his eyes from the night before. In the harsh light of the back of the ambulance, the cornflower blue color had been striking against his soot and dirt covered skin. I couldn’t help the way my heart leapt inside my chest. He was so good-looking my breath caught. Tall, with a muscular frame that had been hidden by his bulky gear, and dark blonde hair that was short in back and on the sides, but a tad longer on top.

  “Oh, hey…” I felt a small smile settle on my mouth. I wasn’t expecting him to drop by the hospital, and thought I’d have to go by the several fire stations in Jackson Hole, to find the one where he worked, in order to get Gem back.

  “How are you doing?” his deep voice reverberated in the small, stark room.

  I felt self-conscious of my surroundings and the hospital gown that I wore. I nervously began to fiddle with the edge of the rough cotton blanket that covered me to the waist.

  “I’m a little sore, I guess. How is Gemmy? Did she keep you up all night?”

  “She did a little, I can’t lie, but… she’s amazing.” One side of his sensuous mouth tugged into a lopsided grin. He was so disarming. “I don’t think I want to give her back,” he teased. “She had some warm milk last night and then we had oatmeal and peanut butter toast for breakfast.”

  “We?” I smiled gently.

  “Oh, yeah. I shared mine with her. You should have seen the way she went to work on it.” He stood, towering over me at the foot of the bed. “Sorry, she didn’t seem to like the puppy food I grabbed from your house.”

  “I’m sure she loved it. Thank you, again, for taking care of her; I don’t know what I would have done without you. Would you like to sit down? Forgive my lack of manners.”

  “You’ve been through an ordeal,” he said, understanding lacing his voice. “I can’t stay long.”

  He was right, I had. “But, still, after everything you’ve done to help me, I should be more thoughtful.”

  It felt weird to be equally intrigued and yet have the inherent fear of the male sex which Carter had instilled into me over the past several months. The man’s face twisted ironically, as if to say he didn’t consider me in anyway rude.

  “I’m glad to be of help’. He eased his long body into the one reclining chair next to the window after he moved a pillow from it. “So, you’re getting out of here today, then?”

  “Yes. As soon as my nurse comes back with some street clothes.” I felt embarrassed by my pathetic circumstances.

  “Ah.” His amazing eyes seemed to look right into my soul. I could sense the questions behind the blue depths. Surely, he was wondering why I had no friends or family who could take care of my dog or bring me clothes. “I went out to your ranch this morning to feed the horses, but the puppy cried when I put her in the house and in her kennel. I figured the same thing would happen at my place; strange place and all. So, I thought I’d take her with me to the firehouse for the day, if that’s okay?”

  “Oh, I don’t want to burden you. I’ll be home in a couple of hours.”

  He nodded his understanding, but his brow wrinkled as if he were pained. “Yeah, but they say an hour to a dog is like an entire day to a person, and I just can’t stand leaving the little thing alone that long. Or… at all,” he said with a sheepish grin. “She’ll get to run around, and everyone will love her. I promise I’ll take good care of her.”

  I was looking forward to seeing my fur baby, for that’s what she’d become in the short time I’d had her, and it was sweet that in one night this big, tough fireman had fallen under her spell as well. “It’s so nice of you, but you’ve already done so much. I can see if Gina can bring me to the station to pick her up on the way home.”

  “I can bring her out to your place tonight after my shift. I only have a partial day today. I picked it up for some extra cash. Then, I can take care of the horses, too.”

  “Oh, Ben, you don’t have to do that,” I protested. I felt like I was sliding down in the bed and tried to shift up to get a better position but winced at the pain that shot through my mid-section. “I’ll be home by then.”

  His expression was concerned. “Marin,” he said in mock sternness, proving he’d remembered my name as well. “By the looks of things, you’re in no shape to do chores just yet.”

  I’d done chores in worse shape than this, but I was ashamed of the situation with Carter and I didn’t want to tell him I was used to working with injuries. “I’m okay,” I said, instead. “I’ll be fine.”

  He stood up, shaking his head. “You’re dealing with a lot, and probably not just physically. Let me help you out for a few days until you get back on your feet. It’s the least you can do in exchange for your pooch keeping me up all night.” Ben offered a wink.

  I could feel my skin flush at his teasing. I had a rush of guilt that I found him so charming, but I couldn’t help it. “Well, since you put it that way,” I agreed, a warm blush of happiness washing through me.

  “The fire commissioner will probably be around the burn site to do some investigating later. They might have a few questions for you, too. It’s standard procedure,” Ben assured seeing my shocked expression.

  I tried quickly to hide my fear.

  “I just didn’t want you to be scared if you saw vehicles or people snooping around out there. If you need more time before you speak to them, I can put in a request that they wait a week or two for your statement, but they’ll need to get on-site today.”

  Panic spread through me. I was responsible for Carter’s death. If only I hadn’t gone out to the shop. If I’d waited to talk to him, he wouldn’t be dead. It weighed heavily upon my conscience and now… would I be held accountable? Would I face charges? “I’d prefer some time before I speak to them, yes.” Was that squeaky, meek voice mine? Inwardly, I was freaking out.

  “Understandable. I’ll pass that along. Don’t worry,” Ben said, knowingly. “What happened was an accident and they just have to follow procedure.”

  “Okay,” I said, my trepidation only slightly appeased.

  “Listen, your little girl is in my truck by herself so I’m gonna head out.” He pointed toward the door of the hospital room and flashed a brilliant smile. “No doubt, she’s crying her head off.”

  In light of such an onslaught of kindness, I couldn’t help but smile at the mention of the puppy. She’d been my one true source of solace, though I’d had her such a short time.

  “Which station did you say you were at? In case you try to kidnap Gem, you know.” I laughed softly but still enough to feel it in my ribs. “Ugh,” I wrapped my arms around my midsection as if cradling it would make the pain stop.

  “Oh, yeah, clearly you’re ready for hauling bales of alfalfa. Just rest and I’ll bring her out. See you later, Marin.”

  “Ben?” He’d started to leave, and I stopped him, causing him to glance over his shoulder.

  “Thank you, again.” I meant it with all my heart. He was such a dramatic contrast to Carter’s awful and unkind personality. My heart fell when I realized that when Carter had first come to work at the shop, he’d seemed kind and caring, too, and I fell for it. I wanted so badly for Ben’s words to be genuine.

  He lifted a hand and put it over his heart, barely stopping his stride. He offered a gently grin. “No problem.”

  “Bye,” I said. He left me smiling, but the starkness of the room became overwhelming after his commanding presence, which had just so completely filled the space, had vacated. I was left bereft; the prospect of my future seemed bleak.

  Ben’s kindness was amazing, his smile infectious. For a just moment, I’d almost forgotten that the night before when I’d killed Carter. Then the guilt set in again, and just like that, I broke down into painful sobs.

  BEN

  I couldn’t understand
how such a beautiful and kind young woman, who I now knew as Marin, was so alone in the world.

  She seemed so distraught, and I couldn’t wrap my head around why she didn’t have anyone to help her. Her situation tugged at my heart so much because my father split when my sister, Missy, and I were just kids. Other than Missy, I’d never wanted to protect someone more.

  Marin must be lost without the man who died in the fire. After all, he was all she had in the world after losing her uncle. The responsibility of the ranch and auto shop had to be intimidating. It would be for anyone who’d recently lost so much. I just wanted to make sure she was okay and ease her burden; even if it was just helping out with care of the horses.

  When I arrived at the fire station, little Gem and I made our entrance to a round of cheers and happy greetings. The guys and the captain had discussed adopting a dog for the firehouse, but we’d never gotten around to it, and so they were enthusiastic about this little lady’s appearance.

  “What do you have here?” Davis asked, bending to play with the puppy. “What a cutie! Is this for us?”

  “That’s Marin’s pup—” I paused at the familiar use of her name. “You know, the woman from the shop fire. Last night,” I said awkwardly. For some reason I felt the need to explain.

  My friend’s eyebrows shot up. “Marin, huh?”

  “That’s asinine to imply, Davis. As you know, Marin Landry was injured and taken to the hospital, so this little thing was left kenneled inside her home without anyone to take care of her. What was I supposed to do? Let her go hungry and leave the poor thing to sleep in her own crap?”

  “Uh huh. Don’t forget, I saw her, too. Even bruised and bloody, she was beautiful.”