Your Sturdy Back skill is now level 6!
Threadbare followed the big cat’s scent deeper into the tunnels. He knew he was close behind, when he found shredded remnants of other trash mobs along the way. “Party Screen,” he said with relief...
...and gasped when he saw that Pulsivar was down to half of his hit points. “No!” He ran forward, following the trail as fast as he could, trying to move at top speed without losing it. But it was hard, and to his horror, Pulsivar’s hit points kept dropping, five or six at a time...
...until they stabilized at about thirty. Threadbare didn’t let up, until he came to a red lacquered door, standing slightly ajar. Gold-painted letters on it announced to the world;
TRASH PANDA
Threadbare burst through the door, trash mobs following, clanking and tumbling...
...to find a room filled with paper screens, currently shredded. The floor was full of torn up mats, and odd looking weapons made from junk hung on the walls. Pulsivar was nowhere in sight, but lying against one wall, gutted with stuffing bursting out of her shredded hide, was Missus Fluffbear.
Wait.
No, this wasn’t her. This version of her had white fur mingled in with her regular black color. Also she was two feet tall, nowhere near the six inches she started with. About half the size of the Bearserker.
Just to be safe, though....
“Eye for Detail”
Your Eye for Detail skill is now level 4!
No, this one was something called a “Trash Panda.” Another midboss, by the looks of it. Another construct. Huh, wait, she had the Fancy Flourish skill as well...
That’s about the point that an ungodly racket sprang up behind him, and Threadbare whirled to find a big black bobcat ripping one of his bound Trash Mobs to bits.
“Wait! No!” He ran and hugged Pulsivar, and the cat twitched, surprised. Golden light flared.
You have healed Pulsivar 90 points!
Your Innocent Embrace skill is now level 10!
Your Fascination skill is now level 3!
The Bobcat abruptly stopped attacking the mob. When the mob went after Pulisvar, Threadbare called it off. Then the big cat was purring, and licking his face.
“Okay, okay, okay,” Threadbare patted the cat until he backed off. If Threadbare was right about what had happened last time, then midboss corpses didn’t last forever. They had to loot it and hurry away. Threadbare salvaged a yellow cloth belt from the fake Fluffbear’s corpse, wound it around his waist, and hurried on through the only other door out of the place, with Pulsivar and his Trash Mobs at his heels.
After the door shut behind them, Threadbare checked his status screen. Nice! The belt boosted his agility and dexterity, and gave a bonus to his Fancy Flourish skill. While he was there he checked his new pants, and found them good as well. They had something called “Hammerspace,” which let him store a blunt weapon in their pockets regardless of its size. They’d be handy for storing his scepter if he ever got ahold of it again.
Missus Fluffbear had been holding the scepter when the raccants dragged her off. Maybe it was still in here?
The corridors they ventured into were different from the rest. As they went down them, the trash mobs disappeared, replaced by the occasional wandering raccant carrying thin paper boxes full of strange-smelling stuff that crunched underheel after Threadbare and his party fought and slew the wandering monsters. He lost the Trash Mob that Pulisvar had wounded, but scarcely noticed as the scenery changed.
The corridors now had brightly-colored flashing lanterns strung along them, and occasionally they passed a rolling red-and-white striped ball, or a bit of cloth arranged to look like the outside of a tent, strung up along the stone tunnel. A strange music started to play in the distance, cheerful and upbeat and bouncy.
It was all more than a little surreal, and Threadbare was glad when they emerged out into a huge cavern, as brightly-lit as day. All around them, to his horror, were stands full of raccants, stone steps laid out like bleachers. But on the upside, at least some of them thought his pants looked cool.
Your Work It Baby skill is now level 6!
Directly ahead were three rings, each as big around as the entirety of Caradon’s property.
One ring held an arrangement of scrap wood hammered together with poles and ropes in it. A raccant was balancing on a wire stretched between the two highest poles, twirling a parasol and resplendent in a tutu.
Another ring had a small wooden wagon with a bulging cloth cover over it, zooming around. On closer inspection, raccant feet were visible just under the wagon, trampling along and driving it in circles.
A third ring held an oversized raccant in a mask that said “LYIN”. He had a mane made out of straw, and wore big brown pajamas. Currently he was sticking the head of a small doll in the mask’s mouth, then pulling it out again. With a shock, Threadbare recognized Beanarella, Celia’s old dolly!
“Welkim! Welkim!” A voice boomed from overhead. Threadbare and Pulsivar jumped...
...as a portcullis dropped behind them, sealing off the tunnel they’d come through.
“Welkim tooda gray test shon nerf!” The voice continued, chittering, as a platform lowered from the ceiling, revealing the biggest raccant yet.
This one had a different mask from the others. It said “HOOMIN,” and bore a warped caricature of Mordecai’s face. Threadbare could tell by the bushy eyebrows. They were made from real bushes.
The raccant was dressed in a long red coat with tails, in addition to his own, fluffy ringed tail. He bore a whip in one hand, and a cone that he shouted through in the other, and on his head was a tiny top hat. A familiar tiny top hat. Threadbare had worn that many a time, during tea parties.
“You took those!” Threadbare accused, his voice lost in the calliope music. So they’d salvaged more from the house, than just his friend! Well, he’d have it all back, then. Just a matter of beatings. He flexed, called up his self-esteem, and bodyguarded Pulsivar for good measure.
Your Flex skill is now level 13!
Your Self-Esteem skill is now level 13!
Your Bodyguard skill is now level 6!
The Ring-tailed master nodded, as the bear made his preparations and the cat hunkered low, freaked out by the noise and looking for something to kill to shut it up.
“Komm iffu dair! Chall enj all freerings to winna prise!”
Turning aside to the audience, he mock-whispered through the megaphone; “The prises beetings.”
Well, he was right. Just not in the way he intended.
Threadbare and Pulsivar rushed the first ring, and the tightrope walker hurled down circus balls at them, that bounced for minimal damage when they struck. Eyeing the distance up to her, Threadbare considered that she’d be throwing things at him the whole time he was trying to climb up there to get at her, and then he’d have to fight her while balancing on a tightrope... yeah, no.
Threadbare looked around for an edge, and saw the jumble of planks that made the “poles” that her tightrope wire was stretched between. They were pretty poor construction, and jiggled every time she ran back and forth up there. An idea formed, just as another ball bounced off his head.
Well. Why not?
“Animus,” the little bear breathed as he touched one of the supporting poles. “Invite Pole.”
Your Animus skill is now level 11!
Your Creator’s Guardians skill is now level 11!
The tightrope walker stared at him uncomprehendingly, up until the point that one of her supports suddenly twisted, went spastic, and jiggled her wire so hard she fell off the rope.
Right into Pulsivar’s waiting jaws.
CRUNCH.
The crowd oohed, aahed, and applauded. Her parasol fluttered down, pink and frilly, and Threadbare caught it, tucking it away into his apron with nary a thought. His eyes were on the next challenge. He dismissed the pole from his party, leaving it to its own devices, as he moved on to the second ring and the wooden wheeled
wagon.
Well, maybe he could animate the wagon, too. Threadbare started towards it, ignoring the cries and shrieks of the dying raccant as Pulsivar ate her, and stretched out a paw to slap the wagon. But just before he could reach it, one of the cloth covers flipped aside, and a raccant spilled out, wearing a mask smeared with white and red makeup.
Then another.
Then another.
Then another.
But by that time Threadbare’s trash mobs had caught up with him. He left the curious raccants to the mobs, and slapped his hand on the wagon, even as it spilled out far more occupants than it could possibly carry. “Animus,” he declared, tanking hits as he got his paw on the little wheeled device. “Invite wagon.”
The Klwon Kar has resisted your spell!
Then the thing zoomed off, leaving him in a mob of... Klwons? Okay. The wagon stopped a little ways away, and spilled out more raccants.
They weren’t tough raccants, his trash mobs looked to be taking them down pretty easily, but they bounced all over the place, squirted him with weird water bottles that damaged his moxie, and ran around honking weird rubber and metal devices for no reason at all. Doing his best to ignore them, he ran after the car, managed to catch it, and slapped it again. “Animus! Invite Klo... Klw... Invite Kar!”
Your Animus skill is now level 12!
Your Creator’s Guardians skill is now level 12!
Thoroughly annoyed, Threadbare gave the Kar its marching orders, and it revved up, wheels squealing as the occupants inside shrieked and tried to escape. A few more got out, but then the little Kar zoomed at high speed across to the next ring and plowed straight into the unsuspecting “Lyin.”
For some reason the Kar blew up into a big fireball. A red ‘264’ floated out from the debris, as did the charred remnants of the Lyin’s mane. Threadbare turned his back on the explosion, glaring at the remaining Klwons with button eyes.
Boy, there were a lot of them. Three of his Trash Mobs were down, leaving one more trying to hold back a tide...
...then a black shadow passed overhead.
THUMP.
Pulsivar came down, and went to work. Threadbare waded in as well, claws out and shredding. It was surprisingly satisfying. They’d worked up his temper with all those water bottles and klwoning around, and he took it out on them, killing with satisfaction for the first time ever.
And at the end of that fight, new words came up.
Congratulations! By killing in anger you have unlocked the Berserker job!
You cannot become a Berserker at this time! Seek out your guild to change jobs.
Huh. Well... Threadbare felt slightly ashamed, for no reason he could tell. He slowed, looking around him at the carnage—
—then another stupid jet of water hit him, and he shrugged and waded back in. They had it coming.
Finally, the ring was empty of the enemy. Their strange corpses faded, leaving behind only one of those rubber and brass honking things. He didn’t see a use for it, but Threadbare picked it up anyway.
“Weldon! Weldon!” The Ringtailed Master chittered, and he hopped off the platform. “Clozure I’s an nopen wyde fordee prise! Nukkle sammisches!”
He rushed them, and got a face full of Pulsivar’s claws, reeled back snapping his whip at the big cat—
—to find Threadbare on the other side.
“Challenge! Guard Stance! Fancy Flourish! Grrrrr!”
Your Challenge skill is now level 3!
Your Guard Stance skill is now level 3!
Your Fancy Flourish skill is now level 6!
Your Growl skill is now level 2!
The Ringtailed Master’s Woop Woop skill hurt their moxie, but they persisted. His Whippersnapper skill, which had bonuses against big cats, was thoroughly thwarted as half his attempts were intercepted by the bodyguarding Threadbare. And damn did Pulsivar hit hard.
The bear was no slouch either. And he could heal any damage the boss dealt.
Your Brawling skill is now level 25!
Your Weapon Specializaton skill is now level 6!
Your Weapon Specialization skill is now level 7!
STR +1
DEX +1
Critical Hit!
Your Weapon Specialization skill is now level 8!
Your Weapon Specialization skill is now level 9!
Your Claw Swipes skill is now level 21!
Your Weapon Specialization skill is now level 10!
Your Mend skill is now level 16!
Your Mend skill is now level 17!
Your Claw Swipes skill is now level 22!
At the end of it all, the outcome was inevitable. A level six boss in a rarely-visited and under-evolved dungeon was just no match for a massively-multiclassed toy golem and a level twenty-one beast. Finally, the Ringtail master fell. Relieved, Threadbare swooped the top hat from the boss’s head, and replaced it on his own. “Mine!” he declared.
And to the victor, went the experience.
You are now a level 10 Bear!
You may Rank Up to a Tier II Bear Job at this level!
Would you like to do so at this time?
“Yes!” Threadbare declared. He’d made his choice long ago, taking everything into account. And then he fell down, holding his head, as it grew by a few inches. His eyes elongated, the buttons becoming bigger...
...and suddenly the bright light in here seemed a little TOO bright.
And then Threadbare was a Cave Bear.
Still a teddy bear, still a Greater Golem, but a bit thicker and with a bigger head.
You are now a level 10 Cave Bear!
CON+10
WIS+10
Armor+5
Endurance+5
Mental Fortitude+5
You have unlocked the Darkspawn Skill!
And that wasn’t the only level up.
You are now a level 3 Duelist!
AGL+3
DEX+3
STR+3
But it was the final one that brought the most interesting results...
You are now a level 5 Animator!
DEX+3
INT+3
WILL+3
You have unlocked the Animus Blade skill!
Your Animus Blade skill is now level 1!
You have unlocked the Arm Creation skill!
Your Arm Creation skill is now level 1!
You have unlocked the Dollseye skill!
Your Dollseye skill is now level 1!
New skills... Threadbare shook his now mildly-larger head, and peered around with new eyes. If he could have seen himself, he would have noticed that the buttons were bigger, darker, so black that they almost seemed hollows within his head. And in there, a tiny gleam flickered like pupils.
The raccants in the stands had fled, he saw. For the minute the room was empty.
But... where was Missus Fluffbear? She had to be here!
He took a sniff. His Scents and Sensibility had helped him so often before...
And it did not fail him now.
PER +1
Your Scents and Sensibility skill is now level 16!
It was coming from above? He lifted his new, sensitive eyes —
—up to where the platform shuddered, and slowly began to retract into the hole in the ceiling.
“No!” He grabbed Pulsivar, interrupting a perfectly good groom, and held fast to the scruff of his neck. The cat jerked its eyes to the little bear, looking mortally offended. “Up! We need to go up!” Threadbare pointed with his free hand. “Jump! Please Jump!”
Fortunately, he’d just equipped some very good charisma gear.
CHA +1
Pulsivar got the gist of it, and did his thing, running and leaping for all he was worth, as Threadbare hung on tight.
Your Ride skill is now level 8!
It was a very good thing that he was so light, and had gotten so strong.
They made the platform, the cat’s claws clicking and scraping as he caught the lower edge of it, flailed, and pu
lled himself up. All told it was a good thing Pulsivar didn’t have a proper tail anymore, else it would have been severed as the platform clunked into the ceiling.
Threadbare let go, and looked around at the place...
...and realized that he was far, far out of his depth.
It was a void, a black void. The floor was stone, he could feel that under his paws, but there were no walls. Pylons filled the expanse, green pillars of light, flickering softly. In among a cluster of the pillars, a red crystal the size of Threadbare hovered, swaying up and down, as small lightning bolts arced between it and the pillars.
Some of the pillars had raccants in them. Others had jumbles of random things. Coins, bits of treasure, and familiar looking objects.
And one had Missus Fluffbear, suspended in midair. She looked a little torn and dirty, but she was still intact, still six inches tall, and most decidedly NOT a Bearserker or a Trash Panda.
“There you are!” Threadbare sobbed in relief.
Pulsivar rumbled, low in his throat. He did not like this place one bit. Threadbare patted him. “Stay here please,” he said, then ambled toward the cluster of inhabited pillars.
As he approached each one, glowing letters faded into existence. One pillar filled with a pile of worthless junk got the letters MINION – TRASH MOB.
Another held one of the raccant guards. MINION – RACCANTEER
One held the bard he’d fought. MIDBOSS 1 - MC SLAMMER
Another held someone he hadn’t encountered... a Raccant with a blonde wig and a torn up dress, holding a weird gizmo with buttons and numbers on it. She had two labels; MIDBOSS 4 – RACCANT EVEN, and MIDBOSS 5 – THE VERY MODEL OF A VARMINT MAJOR GENERAL. He hadn’t come across this one. Maybe she was in another part of the dungeon?
The one with Missus Fluffbear in it had two labels. MIDBOSS 2 – BEARSERKER, and MIDBOSS 3 – TRASH PANDA. He reached for it...
...and his paws frizzed, blurred and started flashing green. Ow! What was this? He pulled them back, quickly. It felt almost like... like that one time, back in the Catamountain, during the final fight when Celia had almost hit him with an electricity ball.
Threadbare turned, to look at the red crystal.
He moved up to the pillar under it, the one labeled DUNGEON BOSS – RINGTAIL MASTER.
The Ringtail Master looked back.
Threadbare Volume 2 Page 5
