Epsilon

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Epsilon Page 14

by Dezirae Bates


  Cassidy held on to the door, glancing from Sebastian and taking a step into the room and the groan fled from her lips before she could even attempt to stop it. When she expected Sebastian to leave her alone inside the room, she didn’t anticipate him following after her, helping her walk through the room despite the negative effects he’d feel from sitting in an Epsilon channeling room.

  “Sebastian, you don’t have to stay in here, you’ll feel like shit before you even realize it,” Cassidy said, finding a nice sized couch and enjoying the cozy feeling that settled not only her nerves but every fiber of her being.

  Sebastian knew it would be hard to tell the changes that the Epsilon room would make on him as time ticked by but it was worth it for him to stood where he stood, despite what he’d feel like afterwards. It wasn’t something he wasn’t already used to.

  “You worry about you, let me worry about me, alright?” he said, sitting across from her, glad to see that it seemed to be working enough for her to calm down more.

  “You’re mad at him, at Chase,” Sebastian said after a few moments of letting Cassidy absorb what the room could give her.

  It really was a Godsend, what channeling rooms could do for that Origin. Sebastian could feel the oncoming feeling of his hands wanting to shake but he subdued it enough so that Cassidy wouldn’t notice.

  “I don’t know what I am with Chase,” she said with a gentle laugh, shaking her head and resting her cheek against her knees with a heavy sigh. “I thought that I knew him, that I knew what he stood for, that he wouldn’t...”

  She swallowed, clearing her throat. “I had my entire history erased from me. I don’t know what’s real... I don’t know what is fake. I don’t even know my own damn Dad anymore and...” She took in a deep breath. “To have him seemingly willing to just alter my memory to get his own way, that’s...” She licked her lips and looked up at him, trying to process through the night’s events. “Terrifying,” she finished, her thumbs running against the comfort of her jeans.

  “That's why you came here, though, isn't it? Even if you didn't know what you were going to find, we offer a way to show you that they're not such a happy family. You have your doubts just like we all did.” Sebastian tried to offer some semblance of good faith, knowing that she wouldn't feel better until she found a way to speak to Chase.

  “Is there a way to block it?” Cassidy asked, strengthening the hold on her legs as she watched him. It was never a thought that she thought she needed to handle but obviously, it was something she was suddenly curious about. The privacy of her own thoughts and mind were hers, and hers alone. And she'd prefer to keep it that way.

  “Not that I know of.” He swallowed. “Wherever this all started, someone somewhere made sure that only one can control one Origin. A Chi can read another's mind and vice versa. We've learned how to cover it, to think of other things to confuse someone getting into our heads but there's no known way to do it. Yet, at least,” he said, standing up and quickly shoving his hands into his jeans to prevent from showing how much they were shaking.

  “You rest and let me know when you want to go back home and I'll get you there. You might feel like a prisoner but, I promise you, we just want to keep everyone safe.” Sebastian watched her until she nodded, walking to the edge of the Epsilon doorframe, glancing back at her.

  “Sebastian?” she said, watching him and cracking a smile. “Thanks, for staying with me,” she said before he nodded his head towards her.

  “Anytime.”

  Chapter 17

  Nearly twelve hours later, Cassidy woke back up with a start. The woman who electrically manipulated the screens when the newbie was found was inside the Epsilon channeling room had picked her up and was dragging her out of there as quickly as she could.

  “Hey!” Cassidy yelled, clamouring to her her feet and instinctively bringing the green Origin to attack her but the woman let go of her and pushed her against the wall, trying to keep her voice low.

  “Look, I let you sit in there as long as I could but Geneva is bound to go in there soon and having you caught in there is far worse than me dragging you out,” she said, trying to calm Cassidy down. She nodded, straightening up and smoothing out her clothes that were now sticking to her body, the blood stains practically burned into the material.

  “No, you're right, you just startled me,” she said, glancing to her hands as the woman took a step back.

  “Jane, by the way.” She looked Cassidy over and shook her head. “Come on, let's get you cleaned up and fresh clothes on. It'll help,” she said and Cassidy cracked a smile, following after her. “Don’t take Geneva so seriously. She doesn’t do well with competition, whether it is another person in her Origin or someone that might take Sebastian’s eye away,” Jane laughed, the long strands of her black hair in a side braid that hit around her ribcage. Black jeans with a black shirt, black eyeliner and bright hazel eyes, Jane was probably a few years older than Cassidy but they had similar builds.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Cassidy laughed as the two walked, trying to remember the ways in which Jane led her down the maze of halls to her room.

  “I mean, Geneva and Sebastian used to be a thing, long time ago. He spiraled pretty quickly after your Mom died and she seemed to do a pretty good job at distracting him for a while until he realized how much of a bitch she was. They haven’t been together in over six months but there’s still some hostility there and she’s far too possessive. She doesn’t enjoy sharing.” Jane opened the door to find a rather lackluster room.

  “There’s nothing going on there. He helped save my ass and happens to be Chase’s brother. Since I’m joined to Chase still, there’s obviously some brotherly stuff going on that I don’t really know all too much about.” She shrugged, glancing around until she spotted the shower, pointing towards it.

  “More than you could ever imagine, actually,” Jane teased as she nodded, moving to grab up a towel and a wash rag. “I’ll grab you some spare clothes, feel free to take your time. I’ll be down in the cove if you need me,” she said, gesturing over towards where the rotunda of channeling rooms were, leaving Cassidy alone once she left.

  Cassidy glanced at the pair of jeans and black t-shirt that was on the bed before bringing herself to look at the mirror in the bathroom.

  “Fuck,” she muttered, bits of her makeup smeared on her face, her hair a mess piled on top of her head. The biggest point of staring at herself was to see just how her body had held up to her own attack against it. A lightning strike brand ran from the epicenter of her elbow to about halfway through her forearm. It was strange to see such a brand on her own body since she was able to control the element without harm but it was because the attack affected Chase that it had caused a scar to form. Her blue eyes locked on to the gaze in the mirror, leaning forward as she stared at herself. So much had changed over the past few months that she wasn’t even sure the woman looking back at her was a woman she liked anymore.

  Her fingers pulled at the fabric, slowly rolling it up towards the top of her head and dropping it to the floor in a rather unwanted pile on the ground. It took a bit more effort to shimmy out of her shoes and jeans but she was glad when the clothing was off of her. It made everything from the night before seem less real now that she wasn’t in clothes that proved her memory to be right.

  Using her abilities, it only took the water about half a second to reach the desired temperature she wanted, the water running a bright red color to a dull orange once her blood was rinsed off of her skin. The pool of water at her feet was a shade of orange, Cassidy sticking her head under the shower to happily rid her frame from the horrors of the night before. The few moments that she had beside herself caused her chest to heave, the worry, the terror, the anger, every emotion she had managed to bury deep within the pit of her stomach managed to break the surface and her hands were trembling as they pushed through her drenched hair. Each breath was harder and harder to take as she replayed the night in her hea
d. Remembering Chase disregarding the woman’s free will, his threat to take away her own if she didn’t choose what he wanted her to. The cold metal piercing her skin—even if she didn’t feel it in the moment, her memory of it was more vivid than she ever anticipated it could be. Having held in everything she’d experienced recently, it felt refreshing to just let out it.

  A whimpered cry left her throat, leaning against the wall to hold her legs up as they begged to buckle, wishing that they could simply clamour to the ground and be free from the responsibility that she seemed to have. Her breaths started to become more and more labored, a lightheadedness creeping up through her mind and it was quickly taking longer to take in a deeper breath. The warmth of hives started to spread against her chest, taking the place of her normally pale skin. She could tell that she was having a panic attack but there didn’t seem to be a way to calm herself down.

  It was then that she felt Chase in her head, first in calming waves and then his voice. Her stomach flipped and churned at her body’s automatic response to his invasion into her mind but she just couldn’t push him out in the moment.

  Cassidy, are you alright? Regardless of the fact that his words were only to be heard in her head, she could tell that there was a lingering worry brimming the surface under his words. It seemed genuine and it caused Cassidy’s knees to finally give way, collapsing to the ground where she pulled her legs to her chest, letting the hot water to continue to cascade around her.

  Get out of my head, Cassidy replied, her fingers running up through her hair as she cried, pulling at the ends as she still tried desperately to capture a breath. Chase’s feelings that overwhelmed their bond did a mediocre job of settling her heart rate but the presence of them in the first place caused her anxiety to increase tenfold. The whole reason she was so unsteady at the moment was what he was putting her through.

  Cass, don’t shut me out. You wanted to go work the other side. I have to hold up appearances. Cassidy, tell me you’re alright. Chase’s words didn’t calm her down like she hoped that they would. Days ago, she wasn’t worried about facing the challenges that being a double agent was going to cause her. She thought she understood the dangers, the things she was going to have to give up to make things safer for everyone but apparently that simple realization was harder to swallow than she ever imagined.

  I just didn’t think that seeing- that being on the other side of this would be so hard to watch. Seeing you, wondering if you were just that good of a liar... I need time, Chase. Even if she wasn’t working on the other side, watching Chase lie without a blink of an eye, it was intimidating. There wasn’t many times that she was able to be clear of Chase’s influence over her. Even when she was by herself, he had the ability to come in and soothe her, rile her up; it was an intoxicating relationship. Volatile. Deadly. It was becoming increasingly apparent how much she didn’t truly know the man that she was attached to. Whether she was learning that from the distance posed between the two of them or simply time, the clarity was welcomed. Hell, she knew if she were having this conversation right in front of him, he’d manage to have her calmed and a puddle in his hands practically instantly. It wasn’t that she was gullible by any means, she just trusted far too easily. Love and emotion impacted her in ways that were indescribable. The Exodus themselves fit her so well because there was a hole that she desperately tried to fill. With anything.

  Just, leave me alone. She finished her sentence, disconnecting herself from their connection the best she could. There was no known way, at least to her knowledge, to shut it off completely but she knew that if she ignored him long enough, it would get easier. As long as she controlled her emotions, as long as she kept herself mellowed enough to survive, she would do just that.

  Cassidy gazed at her hands, expecting to watch them shaking but they weren’t. Perfectly calm, the water having ran clear by this point and she was able to take in a stable few breaths to settle the rest of her heart rate down. The realization was key to not only who Cassidy was but who she also wanted to be. No one could help her. No one could make her stronger or more powerful. She would need to be her own white knight at the end of the day. Standing up for what she believed in and putting her best foot forward was the only way she was going to keep sane through the world she was now living in. And, that was good enough for her.

  She sat for another few minutes, her eyes closed as her body took the hot water as it impacted against her back, embracing both the good and bad pain it caused her. By the time she shut the water off, her skin had shriveled up into prunes. As she toweled off, a quick glance to herself in the mirror was rather refreshing.

  “I’m stronger than this shit,” she said, watching as her face finally agreed with the statement because, at the end of the day, she was. “No matter what happens, remember that,” she said, pointing to herself and cracking a small smile, finishing drying off the rest of her body. Cassidy pulled on the clothes that Jane had found for her, thankful that the women were similar shapes and returned to the rest of the group down the hallway in the cove.

  Chapter 18

  How’s she doing?” Joseph asked, the main members of the League seated around a round table in the center of the Cove. It’d been roughly a month since Cassidy decided to move in full time with the League. Her connection to the Exodus was still in tact as was her bond with Chase but it was only a matter of time until she was convinced otherwise to break those lasting ties. She was noncompliant to her double agent duties for the first week in the League but it didn’t take long to convince her that the info was necessary. Much like the Chancellor had tried to explain to her, this was bigger than one side versus the other. This encompassed all five origins abilities to stay stable. Neither group could continue on in a means to blow each other off of the map entirely. She agreed to give detailed information to the Exodus in exchange that no one in the League would be harmed. Cassidy sought a way to convince both sides that they could exist in harmony. No war, no armies, simply life. The Chancellor and the Elders had agreed to her terms and because so, Cassidy agreed to continue spying on them to hopefully find a way to convince them that fighting one another was simply too volatile for the whole. And while the Exodus seemed to be accepting Cassidy’s newfound plan of peace and harmony between everyone, the League was still out for blood.

  “Strung out, among other things,” Caleb said, glancing into the Epsilon channeling room to find Yvette, the newbie that Cassidy and Sebastian managed to save from the Exodus, curled up on the floor, shaking violently. Once the history was explained to her after the pair saved her, she became the epitome of terrifying. Her Origin, Sigma, picked her almost instantly and it appealed to her soul more than any other. She was a troubled woman, full of hatred, full of a need for revenge and that was only fueled tenfold when she had the ability to manipulate life forces. The obsession into dismantling the Exodus was heightened by Geneva and her increasingly sadistic behavior and Yvette found herself using in heavy doses, needing more and more to just keep going. They were at a point that Yvette nearly was caught using against humans out in town and that was when the League was forced to step in and handle the situation.

  “Your Origin changes a person.” Cassidy spoke up, a dark t-shirt clinging to her body with a pair of worn jeans and her hair up with a few messy curls surrounding her face. It was clear that she was battle worn, exhausted but there was an apparent strength to her that was far more noticeable than ever before. She was leaning back against the wall away from the table, her foot on the wall and arms crossed over her chest. It was clear that she wasn’t allowed in the inner circle just yet, having her connections to the Exodus even still.

  “Thank you, Captain Obvious,” Geneva said but Cassidy pushed herself off, staring into the Epsilon room with an exhausted sigh.

  “No, not origins, their Origin, Sigma. I might not wield it but the few times I’ve felt it... it’s dark and endless and that kind of power to someone already known to have issues is destructive,” Cassidy sa
id, staring at Yvette groan, unconscious but her body was still fighting her internal demons.

  “It picked her for a reason though. I won’t disagree with you but she can handle it. We just need to figure out a better way to help,” Caleb said, rubbing the back of his neck. It was obvious that he had grown to care for her over the past few weeks, especially when there weren’t that many Sigma in the first place to share stories with.

  “I know that you want to have hope, Caleb, but we have to be smart here. She nearly killed a human and we can’t have both the Exodus after us and the humans.” Joseph piped up, leaning forward on his forearms and crossing his fingers out in front of him as he stared at the others. “I vote that we wipe it from her and help her that way,” he said, leaning back in his chair and staring at the others. Some nodded but there were a few who had thoughts otherwise.

  “Absolutely not! You can’t-this woman’s mind has already been played with! And, we still don’t know if that has a negative effect in the future. It’s her goddamn mind. If anything, we should be giving her reign over that,” Cassidy argued and Caleb nodded in agreement. Geneva was obviously on Joseph’s team, Jane seeming indifferent and Bryan seemed to agree with Cassidy. Sebastian was rather stoic, seated next to Joseph.

  “And we can’t have someone with her abilities be a nutcase either,” Joseph argued which caused Cassidy to rub her face, frustrated with the entire outcome. Geneva started to speak but was quickly cut off by Cassidy.

  “What if we try my way first. I go in, try and help her, give her a place to anchor to, guide her through it and if I can’t—if I can’t get her to hold on to the part of herself that she never dare to forget, you guys can have your way,” she offered, watching their expressions. There literally wasn’t much to risk, other than Cassidy herself but she wasn’t seen as a great loss, at least not yet.

 

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