by D. H. Quinn
“Before?” I question.
Arden’s face becomes serious. “There is a before and an after for everyone, mine came early,” he shakes his head as if this will get rid of the disturbing memories that are stored in there. I understand he does not want to share more.
“Do you travel this way because of the Mahrts?” I ask curiously as he leads us down a street made of steel and metallic houses.
Arden shudders, “partly, I don’t like them but that is not the only reason.” Arden pauses in the middle of the street. His face serious once again. “We have to watch out for voids, they show up every once in a while, and suck us up,” he explains, his hand makes a claw shape and motions downwards.
He starts to walk again and I follow him closely. “That does not sound pleasant,” I say.
“It’s not,” Arden replies simply. I wait for him to say more but he doesn’t. I can imagine Arden’s past traumas contribute to his current state.
We turn down an alley way. A figure crouches in the shadows but I dare not give it attention. Arden grabs my hand and pulls me forward quickly. Once he makes contact with my skin, something flashes in my mind. An old dream, when I was young. Arden and I were in a land made of sweets.
We hustle past the shadow. “Arden, I know you. You were in one of my,” I stop myself. I don’t think Arden liked being reduced to a dream walker or being featured in dreams for that matter. “We met before when we were kids,” I amend.
“Did we?” He asks. “There has been so many humans I hardly remember.” His response disappoints me.
“We must be the same age then,” I say. Dream walkers might have ages too.
“I suppose so,” Arden says and then goes quiet. He releases my arm and I stay quiet as well. He had been patient with me thus far but I remember him shushing me and Garrett and I figure he might need the silence to concentrate. Besides, I did not want to run into anything like the snake creature or a void for that matter if they are indeed worse than Mahrts.
He shakes his head and turns back around to the way we came. Sure, his method is exhausting but if it got us to where we needed to go safely then I could respect it. We end up at a small village area that reminds me of a snapshot out of a history book. The paved dirt road aligns the thatched roof huts made out of mud.
An older weathered man leans against one such building. “Gavin,” Arden calls out. The man lifts his right arm and waves and I notice his other arm is missing. Gavin stands taller and smiles at us as we walk over.
“Hey Arden good to see you.”
“Gavin we want to try something on you,” Arden says bluntly.
“Is that so?” Gavin eyes sparkle with curiosity.
Arden glances around wearily. “Let’s go inside,” Arden says and then storms into the house.
“Arden’s the same as ever,” Gavin says, shaking his head with a smile on his face. “Who are you by the way? I have never seen you around?”
“I’m Kamari,” I say, sticking out my hand which Gavin shakes. “We should follow him,” I say quickly, trying to avoid any further questioning, keeping a low profile as Jack had recommended. Gavin takes the lead inside his house and I follow. We walk into a big circular room with nothing on the walls besides the door we came through. A hammock stands on one side of the room and a table and one chair sits on the other.
Arden stands impatiently by the hammock. “We need to do this,” Arden says.
“I'm not sure what I agreed to,” Gavin says hesitantly then adds, “or if I agreed to anything for that matter.”
“You don’t like dreamlusions,” Arden says.
Gavin shakes his head. “As I have said before, my arm is fine.”
“I know but you are trustworthy and worthy of our test,” Arden says. My jaw drops. I am meant to create his arm. A bubbling nervous feeling occurs in my stomach.
“Arden I trust you, you know that but I don’t know,” Gavin scratches the back of his head in thought.
“Give it a try,” Arden says and then looks at me. “Do it.”
“Are you sure, I don’t know if I can.” Arden’s eyes glaze over and I can see that he desperately wants this. What did he owe this man? I swallow my questions. “I may not be good at this,” I address Gavin.
Gavin glances over at Arden and sees his stony stare. “Do it, whatever it is," Gavin says to me with confidence. I stare at Gavin’s sleeve that is missing an arm and the thought comes instantly, a peg leg, a pirate and Gavin transforms and grimaces down at his new leg and clothes. He laughs.
“Kamari!” Arden scolds.
“Shoot, I am sorry,” I place my hand over my eyes in embarrassment. I can’t look at Gavin without wanting to laugh and that brings in a slew of other thoughts.
“Wait a minute, this is real?” Gavin gasps.
I focus and picture the man he was when I met him and I am relieved to see him back in his normal state. I look at his other arm for inspiration and picture his other arm on the other side and will it to existence.
Gavin lifts his new arm up, mouth agape. “Wow, I,” Gavin begins.
“See, it is done,” Arden says causally but the relief in his body is evident.
“Did you need some furniture while I am at it?” I ask before I can stop myself. I look around his bare bones structure.
“Thanks but I much prefer my house how it is,” Gavin replies. My face flushes.
“I am sorry, it is my mother speaking,” I say. Gavin just raises his eyebrows.
“Your mother speaks through you,” Arden asks as he steps towards me. He examines my mouth as if my mother would just pop out.
I laugh then, “I am sorry Arden,” I place my hand on his shoulder. “It’s just a metaphorical phrase not a literal one,” I say and see confusion grow on his face. “It’s not real,” I say finally.
“Oh,” Arden says, seemingly disappointed. He rests his hand on my shoulder mirroring me. “Thank you for this,” he tells me earnestly. He releases me and I him.
“Well thank you for your visit. It’s about time I,” Gavin stops mid-sentence as I wake up. It is Sunday and I am awake at 10 am.
“Good morning Auggie,” I say to my dog who jumps up from his warm part of the bed and stretches. I have a full day to just relax. I do have some errands to do but nothing too time consuming. My mind is consumed with thoughts of my dreams. I have never had such a coherent dream let alone a continuous story from the last dream. It doesn’t make logical sense.
After breakfast I dive into research about such dreams. The first thing I come across is lucid dreaming. This is when an individual is awake within their dreams. They can control the environment they are in and they can control the narrative. This explains my situation somewhat except I do not believe I am in charge of every aspect of my dream.
I read story after story of lucid dreaming, hoping for an explanation. Some are amusing and some are downright disturbing. They all are nonsensical though which does not match what I am experiencing. I type in Mahrt and pull up some tabs. The concept originated from Germany, a demon of dreams. I stare at the picture of a Mahrt, eyeless with sharp angled features, its mouth wide with long fangs, its tall and shrouded in darkness. I think of the figure that stood in my bedroom and shiver. I close my laptop and sigh. This is not helping.
I take my dog for a walk in the nice weather to clear my head. My dog happily prances on the sidewalk in front of me and my nerves start to calm. I am over stressed about a dream and it is ridiculous. Still, I cannot get over the realness of the people in my dreams, their emotions, their motivations. I focus back on my dog who slows his pace an indicator that it is time to head home.
My afternoon crawls by slowly due to my anticipation for tonight. I decide to go to the grocery store and prepare for the week to keep my mind off of it. Afterwards, I feed my dog and cook dinner. Everything I do here is normal and boring and draining but my dreams are different, they make me feel something. Even if much of that is fear at least it’s something. I am in b
ed by 9pm. I excuse it, knowing I do have to wake up early for my job. I doze off at 9:30pm.
Chapter Three
I awake in Gavin’s almost empty house. The sunlight pours through the door and I step outside. Gavin leans against his house much like he had been the day before. His arms rest crossed against his chest.
“You’re back.” Gavin’s voice is welcoming.
“I am. I guess I just appeared here today.”
“It’s true then, you are a human.” His eyes widen.
“I am,” I pause almost adding that being human is hardly an achievement. “How’s your arm?” I ask instead.
Gavin swings his new limb back and forth, “great! Feels better than before.”
“I am glad.” I smile slightly.
“I’ll call Arden over to come get you.”
“Wait, can I speak to you for a moment?” I ask.
“Let’s go inside.” He nods. We end up standing awkwardly by his table and his one chair. My brain focuses on the chair and I automatically create a duplicate chair.
“Sorry.” He didn’t want more furniture in his house. He takes a seat on my newly created chair and I sit in his old one.
“It’s quite alright. Feels sturdier than that one,” he laughs. “So what is it you wanted to speak to me about?”
“Arden,” I reply simply.
“About him?” Gavin’s face grows cloudy.
“You all have a past,” I say. “I think understanding more about Arden would help me understand this world and the people.”
Gavin stares at me thoughtfully. He says nothing for a moment. I for a moment doubt that I correctly read Gavin as an open person.“That boy has been through a lot. We all have.” His eyes cast downwards. I wait patiently as he gathers his thoughts and words. “We used to go out together, to help the human world.” He looks up at me and I nod in reassurance. “We were the same age at one time believe it or not.” He shakes his head sadly.
“In later years, I would often participate in dreams for the both of us. He didn’t want to. So we would always stay together and I would always claim he participated if they questioned us.”
“What made him not want to be in dreams?” I ask curiously.
“That is deeply personal to him but let’s just say some humans have abhorrent desires,” he replies. Sadness overcomes me, not just for Arden but for all of the dream walkers. Humankind isn’t even aware of how they are affecting these beings. How could they? It is not like dream walkers ever proclaimed their consciousness to us.
“And you?”
“I could handle it on some level,” he looks down briefly, clearly ashamed.
“So you guys don’t go out together anymore?”
“No, we stay in. Luckily with Jack’s protection, we are allowed to stay in.”
“And what did it, what was the turning point that stopped you?” I ask.
Gavin sighs deeply. “I suppose it was when I lost my arm. Mares overran me and Arden was farther away than expected. Usually, he would help me escape when the human’s dreams would transform but he said he was distracted. He never told me by what. I am lucky to have escaped but they touched me and not only did I lose my arm but I lost a part of my mind.” Mares! Those are the things chasing me before I found safety in this city. I shiver at the thought.
“And Arden?”
“Arden went out a few more times after that. He forced himself to participate in dreams due to the guilt of what happened to me until he had a mental breakdown. I am not sure exactly what happened when he went out. Anyways, Jack decided to keep him in after that and labeled him incompetent.” Gavin glances guiltily at the front door as he says this.
“That seems like it was for his own benefit, may I ask why he is so afraid of Jack though?”
“Afraid of her, Ha! He fears everything now.” He smiles but a distant flicker in his eyes tells me more exist of this story.
“Well thank you for taking the time to talk to me. I suppose I should go see them before I run out of time.” Gavin nods and pulls out a cellphone from his pocket. He presses one button on the phone and I hear a voice on the other side.
“Yes, she is here,” he says before hanging up. “He should be here shortly.”
Arden surprises me and arrives ten minutes later which is faster than I thought it would take him. Sweat drenches his brow. He must move quickly when he is by himself.
“Hey,” Arden says with a smirk. “We should be going.” Arden is more chipper than usual and Gavin’s current state must be helping with that.
He cautiously leads me through a crowded area. Others’ glances land on me a moderate amount as we pass through. “Does everyone know who I am?” I ask when we are in the middle of a well-lit street. Arden does not answer my question, instead he shakes his head no. I must be paranoid.
We stop our travels at a New York city landscape that looks straight from 90’s movies minus the taxi cabs. In fact, I hadn’t seen any cars in the city whatsoever.
“Do you drive at all?” I ask Arden. A car could help his traveling within the city.
“No, too dangerous and it is just not our way.” He shrugs. The roads that drastically shift could not be easy to drive on either. Arden stops at a building and looks up. “In here,” he leads the way to the entrance.
I push the glass doors and enter into the bare bones structure. Nothing in this building exists besides the four steel walls and the roof. “This is strange,” I say, my voice echoing. “How was all this created?” Dream walkers can not create so I wonder how they built this city. Was it through the route of construction? With the randomness of this city, I did not think that was correct.
Arden realizes I am referencing the city and says, “it has been here as long as any of us can remember although things change, we still believe human influence has something to do with it.”
I nod as I examine the building once again. The never ending emptiness feels intimidating. “What did you want me to do with this?”
“Jack wants an office.”
A sudden urge of creative energy overtakes me, A strong desire to create. “Done,” I say simply closing my eyes and picturing a lobby on the first floor, a security desk and elevators. On the second floor and 60 floors later, I picture cubicles and some corner offices. I picture office supplies and cleaning supplies. Arden gasps. The job is complete. This was an easier task than creating an arm on an individual.
“Does she really need all this?” I ask. The first time I met Jack she seemed so unconventional, now she seems boring.
“Yes I do,” Jack’s voice fills the room as she walks through the entrance. She wears a long gray dress that fits tightly around her waist and hips. Her long hair is slicked back and pushed behind her shoulders. She smiles tightly at me.
Heat rises on my face and I find myself curling inward. A nervous laugh escapes me. “I mean you could avoid becoming less human-like and more dreamlike, more creative,” I bite my lip. Aleksander follows her in shortly and a role reversal has occurred as I try to avoid his gaze. We aren’t supposed to know each other.
Her hands rest on her hips. “Do you think we are clowns?” Jack’s irritation is evident. “I mean I know you humans are selfish but maybe we just want to be normal and not just for your entertainment,” she sighs. My face flushes. Why did I try to give input in their world once again when I knew nothing.
Still, I can’t stop myself, “I meant if humans had no limits, we would be all over the possibility to create something unique.” I want her to understand me. The office I work in like this is nothing special, but the carnival, the psychics tent with touches of their magic, of dreams that was.
“I know what you meant,” she snaps at me, her eyes roll dramatically. “And not that it matters to you, but this office will give all of us a purpose once again.”
I sneak a glance at Aleksander who makes himself small again. Arden disappeared somewhere else rather quickly and I wonder how. “I am sorry. I am ignorant to all o
f this.” I give her what she wants, my resignation and her win.
“Yes you are and it is so disappointing. Honestly, the one human we get,” she waves her arm dramatically in the air.
“But ignorance can be learned from so teach me, don’t berate me.” I lift my shoulders high and look her directly in the eyes. I am faking my confidence sure but, in this moment I feel strong. These characters did not know me and in this world I could create my own identity. I no longer wanted to be meek and inhibited.
Aleksander’s head shoots up and he looks me in the eyes and smiles so warmly. I can also see the moment Jack becomes calm. The annoyed and impatient look disappears from her face. “You’re right,” she says raising her eyebrows at me in surprise. “Maybe we can take the time to learn from each other.”
“I’d like that,” I nod with a small smile that is mostly for Aleksander. I still do not trust Jack, I don’t feel like she is being genuine.
Jack looks around the office, admiring the tall vaulted ceilings. She steps towards the elevator. “I am going to take a tour,” she says . It is not an invitation. She glances back at me as she enters the door, a bemused expression on her face. The elevator closes with a ding.
I approach Aleksander quickly. “Hey.” He is back to his all black outfit and I wonder if Jack forces him to wear this in her presence.
“You shouldn’t be doing this,” he shakes his head.
“Talking to you, yeah I know.”
“No, I mean going off of Jack’s every whim. It won't end well.” The concern is evident is in his eyes.
“You follow her every whim,” I say with a little more snap than I intend too, jealousy rearing its ugly face. What right did I have to even think of a dream walker this way? He probably hated humans just like most other dream walkers.
“She’s my boss, not yours,” he replies rather calmly.
