by Evans, A. K.
“It’s a possibility,” I confirmed. “I guess it’s time to see what I can find out about who owns those homes. Maybe that’ll give me a bit more to work with until I get the final piece here. Although, I can’t imagine that it’s going to give me anything other than a picture of my house.”
My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and my breath seized.
I know. I feel the same.
Ekko missed me, too. I instantly typed out a response.
Let’s get together. I know you have school, so we can meet this weekend if that works for you.
I realized she must have been on her lunch break because three dots inside a conversation bubble showed up immediately.
I don’t think that’s a good idea. We aren’t together anymore and it’ll just complicate things.
Me: We can do it somewhere out in public. How about bowling? This way there’s no pressure.
I watched my screen intently hoping she’d agree. It took a little longer for her to even start typing, but her reply finally came through.
I’m sorry, Dom. I can’t.
“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath.
“Everything okay?” Pierce asked.
I had forgotten he was there.
I slid my phone back into my pocket as I shook my head. “Ekko broke things off nearly two weeks ago.”
“Really? I thought you two were solid. What happened?”
Shooting him a look of frustration, I answered, “Consider it another unsolved case.”
“I’m sorry, man. I know she was special to you.”
“She is,” I corrected. “I’m doing my best now to balance these two situations, but I really wish I could get this damn case solved so I could focus on her. She’s got something else going on and I need to figure out what it is.”
“Let’s get back to the office. We can get Trent the addresses for those homes so he can locate the owners’ names. Then, I’ll help you dig through some of your older cases and see if we can make a connection.”
“Appreciate it, Pierce.”
With that, we picked up the puzzle and put the pieces away. I tucked the envelope under my arm and we left.
As we drove back to the Cunningham Security offices, I couldn’t help but let my mind wander to Ekko. I loved knowing that she was missing me, but I hated that she refused to see me. While I never expected our relationship to end this abruptly, or at all for that matter, it was truly a shock to me that she was willing to completely cut me out of her life. After everything I’d learned about her, I never suspected she’d be able to just walk away without ever seeing me again.
That realization felt like a knife to the gut and I wasn’t too proud to admit that my heart was broken. My only hope was that I’d be able to soon figure out what pulled her away from me and how I was going to fix it.
There was no way I could let go of her.
I just needed some time and a clear head to get her back.
“You’re dead on your feet,” Kate announced as she walked into the break room at work. “Did your man keep you up all night?”
I lifted my head from the table and looked at her. With one look at my red-rimmed, puffy eyes, her smile died.
“Are you okay?” she asked as she sat down next to me at the table.
Kate didn’t know what had happened. The first week following my break up with Dom, I managed to hold myself together while I was at work. During the few days that we had lunch together, I kept the conversation away from the subject of my non-existent relationship by engaging her in the details of her own or by talking about things going on at school.
It was now Thursday afternoon on week two following the most devastating experience of my life and I’d finally succumbed to the pain. It started last night. Elle and I got together at my place because Wednesdays were my night off from school. It was the first we were seeing each other since her wedding at the beginning of December. I had missed her and wanted to hear how things were going for her and Levi adjusting to married life.
After telling me all about her honeymoon, Elle pulled out her wedding album. I flipped through, feeling happy for her and the love that she found. About three-quarters of the way through the album, though, I lost my composure. Elle’s album had been arranged in chronological order of her wedding day. Things took a turn for me when I reached the reception portion of the album. I had completely forgotten until that moment that Elle’s photographer had gotten a photo of Dom and me at the wedding.
In fact, it wasn’t just one photo; there were three of them. Dom’s arm was wrapped around me in all three as he pulled me close to him. I remained focused on the camera in the first two, Dom was like that in only one of them. In the second one, his attention was on me and the look on his face was nothing but pure adoration. In the third photo, I had tilted my head back to look up at him. We were both smiling and happy, blissfully unaware of anything going on around us.
I stared at those pictures for what felt like an eternity before realizing Elle was talking to me.
“I had those printed for you,” she said as she dug through her bag and brought out a folder. The moment she slid it into my hands and I flipped it open to see us inside, the tears started. I quickly closed the folder and her album so I wouldn’t ruin them, and Elle immediately pulled me into her arms.
I told her that Dom and I were no longer together, letting her know that I was the one to break things off, but I never gave her the full truth. I didn’t tell her that I loved him enough to let him go so he wouldn’t have to give up his dream of being a father to lots of children.
Elle stayed with me for a long time, waiting until I’d calmed down before she left. Unfortunately, once she was gone and I was alone in my bed, the tears flowed again. They had done so most of the night, too. With very little sleep, I somehow managed to pull myself together enough to get to work on time and get through the first part of my day.
Now that I was on my lunch break, I found I was struggling to keep it together. So, I rested my head on the table and tried to do some deep breathing to settle myself down. I hadn’t gotten very far before Kate walked in. And now she would know the truth.
“I ended things with Dom about two weeks ago,” I blurted.
“What?! What happened?”
Kate didn’t know Dom. She wasn’t friends with his friends. She was my friend. And I wanted to do something I hadn’t ever had the opportunity to do before now. I wanted to tell her about my troubles and cry on her shoulder.
This didn’t mean that I didn’t value my friendship with Elle. It’s just that I knew she had a loyalty to Dom as well and she was so sweet that she’d want to do what she could to help. That would involve her telling him the truth.
So, I told Kate because I could and because I wanted her support. I explained how I’d been having painful periods for months and how I finally went to see a doctor a few weeks prior. I told her about the diagnosis.
“I don’t understand,” she started. “What does your diagnosis have to do with you not wanting to be with Dom?”
My shoulders fell. “I do want to be with him. I love him. It’s just that we had a conversation back at the beginning of December after we went to that wedding. We talked about children. The both of us want to have a large family with a lot of kids.”
“Isn’t that a good thing?” she wondered.
“Yeah, it was a great thing. Until I got this diagnosis and learned that it can make it difficult to have children.”
Kate reached over and gave my hand a squeeze. “Oh, Ekko. I’m so sorry. Did they say you won’t be able to get pregnant at all or that you might have a hard time with it?”
“My doctor said it’s not impossible, but that it can be very difficult.”
I watched as my friend grew angry on my behalf. “He didn’t feel strongly enough about you to stick by your side through this?”
My eyes rounded. “He doesn’t know. I didn’t tell him.”
“How did he respond wh
en you ended it?”
“He tried to convince me not to and he practically begged me to tell him why.”
Kate kept her head pointed straight at me, but her brows furrowed and she did a lip curl while her eyes stared off to the side. “So, let me get this straight,” she began after a moment of silence. “You love Dom. He makes you happy. You’re miserable without him right now. And you broke things off with him without telling him the reason even after he asked you why and tried to get you to change your mind. Do I have that right?”
I gave her a nod.
“What are you thinking?” she nearly shrieked. “Ekko, please know that what I’m about to say is because you’re my friend and I care about you.”
“Okay,” I responded hesitantly.
“You’re an idiot!”
“What?”
I couldn’t believe she just said that to me.
Kate was so fired up she stood and started pacing. “Finding someone who makes you over-the-moon happy is not easy. Dom did that for you. And you broke it off without even telling him the real reason for it. Don’t you think he deserves to know so he can be the one to make the decision about what he wants?”
“I don’t want to guilt him into staying with me. I couldn’t bear to have him stick by my side out of obligation now, and then years down the road, regret that we’re struggling to have even one child. He wants at least four kids and it would be unfair of me to take that away from him.”
“So you took yourself away from him instead?” she asked, incredulously. “Did you ever think he was able to discuss having that many children with you because he finally found someone with whom he would be happy having those kids? Is it even a remote possibility that without you he might not even want kids?”
I made a feeble attempt to defend myself. “I’m sure he still wants kids. You don’t just give up on a dream because someone does something to throw a wrench in your plans.”
She stared at me in disbelief.
“You did.”
I jerked back at her statement. The weight of the situation settled around me and I realized she was right. I gave up on my dream of having a family with a man who would love me.
Kate must have realized she struck a nerve because she didn’t wait for me to respond. “Have you spoken to him since you ended it?” she asked.
Swallowing past the lump forming in my throat, I struggled to get out, “He sent me a text earlier today and I just sent him a reply before you came in here.”
“What did he say?”
I couldn’t bring myself to repeat it.
He missed me.
I pulled up the text on my phone and handed it to her. She read it and looked at me. A tear leaked from my eye and Kate scanned my face a moment before she pulled the chair next to me and engulfed me in a hug.
“I’ve said my piece,” she started. “As your friend, it’s my job to tell you when I think you’re making a mistake. I’ve done that. It’s also my job to be there to comfort you and support you in whatever decision you make that you feel is right for yourself in a situation like this. That’s what I’m going to do now.”
Kate fulfilled her duties as my friend and comforted me. Nearly two weeks of not having him around me had taken its toll and I took advantage of having someone there who cared enough about me to see me through it. Kate no longer scolded me for my choice. Instead, she held me in her arms and made me feel better just by being there.
“Thanks, Kate,” I finally said when our lunch break was nearly over.
“You’re welcome. I’m here anytime you need me.”
Saturday rolled around, and it was the official two-week mark since I’d last seen Dom. It was also the day I was getting together with Kendall and Jojo. I had questioned whether it was a good idea to meet up with Dom’s sisters and had initially hesitated, but Jojo was persistent. In the end, she managed to convince me.
We had originally planned to meet at Jojo’s apartment, but she called me this morning and said she’d pick me up. I had no idea what was going on, but I wasn’t going to fight her. I knew she wouldn’t accept it if I declined anyway.
When ten-thirty rolled around, there was a knock at my door. Opening it, I found two bright, smiling faces on the other side.
“I hope you’re ready for a day of fun,” Jojo bubbled.
My brows pulled together as I stepped back to allow them to come inside. “Where are we going?” I asked, walking toward the kitchen to grab my purse.
“First up would be my place of employment,” she announced.
“What?”
“We’re having a spa day,” Kendall explained. “Massages, facials, manicures, and pedicures.”
“A spa day?” I worried, though I couldn’t stop myself from imagining just how wonderful it would be to have one. I was certainly doing better financially than I had been in months, but I was not in any position to treat myself to an expensive day at the spa.
“Yep,” Jojo confirmed. “Perks of the job mean that I get to bring one friend once every three months for the works at a highly discounted rate. But you don’t need to worry about the costs because Kendall and I want to treat you.”
I had made it to the kitchen, turned to face them, and insisted, “Oh…no, you can’t do that. It’s too much.”
Kendall walked toward me, took my hand in hers, and said, “When a friend is fresh off a breakup, her girls have to be there for her to see her through that.”
“But,” I stammered, wondering if they knew that I was the one who broke things off with Dom. “Do you know what happened?” I finally asked.
They shook their heads, but it was Jojo that spoke. “We know you two aren’t together anymore and that it was your choice. If you want to share any of that with us, you can. If you don’t, that’s okay, too. Dom’s our brother and we love him, but you’re our friend. So, while you take the time to figure out whatever it is that you need to figure out, we’ll be here for you doing what women do for each other when one of their own is going through a breakup. For you, today, that means you’re getting a day at the spa to relax.”
“There’s no pressure from us, Ekko, for anything other than a day of rejuvenation. We just want you to know that you’re important to us and that we’re here if you need us,” Kendall added.
I shook my head slowly back and forth as I took a few deep breaths, hoping to stave off the emotions that were threatening to send me into a tailspin.
“You’re all so good to me,” I murmured. “And there isn’t anything I can do for you in return.”
“One day I’m sure we’ll both suffer through some heartache,” Jojo started. “All you’ve got to do is be there to lend a shoulder to cry on.”
I tilted my head and gave her a small nod. “I can do that.”
Dom’s sisters engulfed me in their arms and held on to me for a moment before pulling back. Jojo ordered, “Now, let’s get out of here so we don’t miss our appointments.”
At that, the three of us left and made our way to the spa. Not much later, I never imagined I could have felt as great as I did. The facial was refreshing and the massage, even though it wasn’t nearly as wonderful as the one Dom gave me, was incredibly relaxing. While the girls and I were getting our manicures and pedicures together, I worried that we’d struggle to find things to talk about or that they’d try to get me to talk about why I ended things with Dom.
I was genuinely surprised to find that they respected my right to privacy and never once asked about it. In fact, they set me at ease by jumping right in with their own non-existent boy troubles.
“Maybe I’m just being too picky,” Kendall put in when the conversation came up. “I mean, I’ve been on a couple dates over the last few weeks. And while all of the guys were nice enough, there wasn’t even one with whom I was interested in going on a second date.”
“At least you’re getting official dates, Kendall,” Jojo scoffed. “I can’t land a date no matter what I do.”
I jerked my
head in surprise. “Are you serious?”
“Totally,” she sighed. “I’ve been told that I’m too outgoing and some guys are intimidated by that.”
“That’s such a bunch of crap,” Kendall said.
“Maybe I need to start toning it down,” she suggested.
“No!” I cried. “Don’t change who you are. The right guy is going to love you just as you are and he’ll love everything about you.”
As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I regretted saying them. Obviously, I didn’t want Jojo smothering a part of herself just so a guy wouldn’t be intimidated by her larger-than-life personality, but I regretted that I couldn’t take my own advice.
Both Kendall and Jojo looked at me and I had a feeling they knew exactly where my head was. Thankfully, they didn’t call me out for being a hypocrite. Of course, not knowing my reasoning for leaving their brother was probably one of the biggest reasons.
Kendall quickly chimed in, “I guess it’ll all happen for us when the timing is right. Until then, we can have spa days followed by lunch and a girls’ night in with a bottle of wine and some sappy movies.”
“Totally!” Jojo exclaimed before turning her head in my direction. “Are you up for it, Ekko?”
I grinned at them and nodded.
With freshly painted fingers and toes, the three of us took off for lunch. Afterward, we went to Kendall’s condo and I had my first girls’ night ever. I had to be honest with myself and admit that for those few hours I was with his sisters, there was a brief respite from the pain in my heart over losing Dom.
“This cannot be happening right now,” I mumbled under my breath.
It was Friday morning, the week after my spa day with Kendall and Jojo and nearly three weeks since I’d last seen Dom.
Empty was the best word I could come up with to describe how I was feeling. Sadly, I wasn’t sure that Dom was still feeling the same. Other than the one text message I’d received from him when he told me he missed me and asked me to get together with him, he never reached out again. I couldn’t say I blamed him. He was thrown away and when he made an attempt at friendship, I shut that down, too. The more time that passed, the more I didn’t like who I had become.
