by T L Swan
Bridget flops into the seat next to me. Oh damn it, I want to listen to what they are saying.
“So Ben and I kissed,” she whispers.
“Yes,” I answer but I am trying to strain my ears to hear what Joshua is saying to Cameron.
“So what’s the problem?” I ask. Oh god, Didge, not now, I need to hear what’s going on.
“He kissed me when we were dancing,” she replies.
I smile and grab her hand. “This is good,” I whisper.
She shakes her head in disgust. “So then we got carried away and started making out on the dance floor,” she whispers, mortified, and I bite my lip to stifle my smile… it must have been the night for public displays of affection. My cheeks heat at the thought that I had sex on a public beach last night. What was I thinking?
My eyes flick past her to the boys. What are they saying? “Ok, so what’s the problem?” I frown again as I strain to hear above her.
“He went to the bathroom and then didn’t come back for ten minutes and then when he did it was like a different person came back,” she replies.
I frown. “Huh, what do you mean?” I ask.
“I think you should ring her now and demand answers,” I hear Cameron assert.
Oh shit, are they going to call Margaret? What the hell is he going to say to her? Is he going to say he heard it from me? Will she deny it?
“He told me that he wasn’t interested and that he must have had a brain snap,” Bridget sighs.
I frown as I watch the boys. Joshua gets out his phone in slow motion and my eyes widen.
“Are you fucking listening to me at all?” Bridget whispers angrily.
“Huh?” My eyes flick to Bridget. “What did you say?” I ask.
“You’re incredible. Thanks for the advice,” she whispers furiously and gets up and goes back to her seat.
Oh crap, I rub my head in frustration. Now Bridget’s shitty with me too. Joshua dials the number and I sit still. Shit, shit, shit, this is a nightmare.
He hangs up. “Voicemail,” he snaps angrily. Cameron replies something that I can’t hear and then I hear Joshua. “No, I will wait till we get home.” I sigh in relief. Thank god. I sit still in a trance trying to imagine what story Margaret is going to spin. It seems more likely that Joshua and I are cousins but then Cam said that his blood is the same as his father’s… if that’s even his blood type. Mum’s not exactly an expert on this subject. Joshua continues to sit with Cameron for the next hour and I am earning a medal for ear straining. Feeling guilty for my selfishness with Bridget earlier I get up with my iPad and walk back to her seat and sit next to her.
“Sorry Didge.” I grab her hand and she frowns and snatches my iPad from me and starts to type. Ben is not far behind us and she doesn’t want him to hear.
She writes, “I know that your life is perfect now that you have Joshua but please remember that my life has been totally fucked in the process!”
I give her a sad face and take the iPad to write back. “Babe, I’m sorry for not listening. There is just some serious shit going on with the boys this morning and I was trying to listen to what they were saying. It wasn’t fair to you and I’m sorry. Tell me about Ben.”
She frowns as she reads the text and snatches the iPad from me and starts to type. “What’s going on?”
Should I tell Bridget? I type. “Promise me on your life that you can keep a secret.”
“I promise” she writes.
“There is a question over Joshua and Cameron’s paternity.”
She reads the text and her horrified face meets mine. I nod as I narrow my eyes.
“I have no idea what is going on but Cameron had blood tests done and he and Joshua can’t genetically be full brothers” I write.
Her eyes widen as she reads the text.
I write: “And I knew about it.”
She holds her hand over her mouth as her eyes nearly bulge from her head.
“What the fucking hell!” she writes. “How?”
“Margaret told me a year ago that Joshua and I were not cousins and I have kept her filthy secret and this morning I fessed up to Cameron and Joshua” I write.
“Holy fuck!!!!!!!!!!” she replies.
I snatch the iPad from her and type furiously. “Now I know the bitch is going to turn on me because I told them.”
Bridget’s horrified eyes meet mine and she shakes her head. “I have no words” she types.
I nod sadly. “And now Joshua has hardly spoken to me since and I know he is furious. When we get back to his house it’s going to be fucking Armageddon.”
“Holy shit, does Mum know?” she writes.
I shake my head. “No and don’t you dare tell anyone. Not even Abbie.”
She nods. “You have my word.”
I run my hands through my hair in frustration and type in another message. “What did Ben say?”
She shrugs sadly. “That he had a brain snap and that he didn’t mean for it to happen.”
I frown as I take the iPad from her. “Brain snap! That’s an awful thing to say. Screw him Didge” I type.
She nods. “I know, right? What a prick!”
I nod and take her hand in mine and she takes the iPad from me and starts to type. “I don’t want to go to LA anymore. It’s going to be weird now around Ben, and Joshua is going to be as cranky as all fuck. Sounds like pure hell.”
I nod as I stare out the window. “It certainly does.”
A couple of hours later I am woken by Joshua cupping my face tenderly as I sleep on Bridget’s shoulder. “We are landing soon, presh. I’m going to get changed,” he says gently as he grabs my hand.
I sit up sleepily and I squeeze his hand in return. “Ok baby.” I smile. I wait for him to finish and he emerges from the dressing room in the hottest charcoal suit known to man, a white shirt and navy tie. He looks edible, how on earth did I ever get this man?
I rise from my seat and go to my hand luggage. Even though I know Joshua is not openly angry at me, I can feel his disappointment and I think that’s worse. I would prefer he was raging mad, but then I think that’s coming down the track anyway. I go into the dressing room at the back of the plane to change. One good thing that did come from Adrian breaking up with Nicholas was that he needed intense retail therapy to keep his mind occupied and it seems I am his latest styling project. I have underwear to match my outfits, and shoes, bangles and lip gloss to match my handbags. We shopped daily for two or three hours when I finished work and Adrian spared no expense… or should I say Joshua’s credit card spared no expense. The funny thing is I found out he styles Cameron and Joshua too. They haven’t been shopping for themselves for over three years. He does a good job—they always look frigging hot. Apparently the look he is giving me is Olivia Palermo… whatever that is. I put on my new underwear and a new ice-blue dress. It’s gorgeous, made from silk and hangs just above the knee. It drapes and has a low V-neck front and capped sleeves. I think Adrian called it elegant sexy. I gently apply a full face of makeup and pull my dark hair back into a low messy bun. I frown as I pull out the high-heeled strappy ice-blue sandals. I have never been this matching in my life. I look like the damn queen. I then finish off the whole outfit with a cream-coloured large satchel handbag. I stand still and look at myself in the mirror in awe. I don’t even look like me. I look… like I have money. This outfit was damn expensive and I think the shoes alone were over 600 dollars. Adrian instructed me to wear this on the return flight to LA and I feel my nerves rising. I slowly open the door and exit into the plane to find everyone gathered together talking in the aisle. Cameron sees me first and does a low whistle and everyone’s eyes turn to me. My eyes are only on Joshua who is sitting on an armrest. He slowly looks up and gives me a sexy smile as he stands. “You look exceptionally hot Miss Marx.” He holds his head angled to the side as if assessing me.
I gently wipe my hands over my thighs nervously. “I thought if I was going to be a Stanton I had better look t
he part,” I reply awkwardly.
Joshua’s eyes lock on mine and he gives me the best come-fuck-me look I have ever seen. “Did you now?” he replies.
Everyone else on the plane has disappeared and I inwardly smile to myself. He liked that answer, he liked it a lot.
“I like the sound of you being a Stanton,” he whispers darkly with his eyes still locked on mine.
I give him a small smile. “Me too,” I reply quietly. My eyes flick to Adrian who gives me a smirk and a wink. I love that man—this is all his doing. Joshua holds out his hand and I take it and he leans in and kisses me gently on the cheek. I feel like I want to jump in the air and punch the sky… this outfit is a direct hit… yes and exactly what I had hoped for.
We walk back to our seat and I hear Cameron and Abbie behind us make some joke about watching bad porn and I giggle.
We sit down and Joshua leans across and grabs my face and kisses me passionately.
“I love you future Mrs Stanton,” he whispers as he studies my face, his hand on my jaw.
I smile broadly as emotion fills my eyes with tears. “I love you too, Joshua, so much.” Maybe everything is going to be ok after all.
Our moment is broken by the flight attendant’s voice in the cabin: “Please fasten your seat belts and prepare for landing.”
Fifty minutes later we are in customs waiting to exit into the airport. Ben is being his domineering self and throwing orders to all of the guards.
Max comes over to me. “Tash, when we get outside, I will be to your left, ok. Don’t acknowledge the photographers or answer anything that they say to you. Keep a hold of Joshua’s hand and walk as quickly as you can.”
I frown at him and my eyes flick to Joshua. “Listen to him, presh,” Joshua says as he fiddles with his cufflinks.
I nod nervously. “What about the girls?” I ask.
“They will be in front with Adrian, Cam and a guard,” Max replies. “Ben and I will be with you and Joshua.”
My eyes flick to Ben as the other three guards start to get the luggage and exit with it on trolleys.
“Aren’t we going with them?” Bridget asks.
“No, they will load the cars before we exit this room,” Ben replies in a cool tone.
Bridget, Abbie and I exchange looks—frigging bizarre. “This is overkill. We are not Beyoncé you know.” I frown.
Ben smiles and Joshua grabs my hand affectionately and starts to twist my engagement ring. “I don’t know. You look pretty bootylicious to me.” He smirks
My face drops. “That’s what Gran used to call me,” I murmur sadly. Joshua hangs his head and he kisses me gently. “I know presh,” he whispers as he smiles gently. “I remember.”
I frown. How would he remember? Oh that’s right, my diaries. I shake my head. Is there anything he doesn’t bloody know? The guards return from taking the bags out to the car and Ben once again starts shooting orders around. “Peter, I want you next to Bridget please.” Peter nods and moves around next to Bridget and she and I exchange looks. Adrian sighs, throws his head back and closes his eyes, obviously very sick of this routine. Cameron and Adrian then start to exit the doors with Abbie and Bridget behind them. The other guard walks next to Bridget on her left as requested, and then it is just the four of us. I remember the last time I was at this airport how oblivious I was to all of this. Adrian and I just walked through but now I know Joshua was trying to protect me and we had hardly any luggage that time.
“Let’s go, sweetheart,” Joshua says gently and my heart drops. I know he only calls me that when he feels sorry for me. He takes my hand and we exit slowly and then I see it—a huge crowd of photographers behind the glass wall rushing towards us. Ben is in front slightly, holding his arms out so that we can keep walking and Max is directly next to me.
“Mrs Stanton,” they yell.
“Did you have a nice holiday Joshua?” another yells.
Joshua quickens his pace and I struggle to keep up in these ridiculous matching shoes. Mental note, wear runners next time.
“Are you staying in LA permanently, Natasha?” another man yells.
What the hell! I hate that they know my name. We continue to walk quickly through the airport with these idiots clamouring around us. Joshua, with his head down, keeps walking with my hand in his but I can’t help but notice all of the people around us looking at the commotion. At one point Max puts his hand on my elbow to remind me to keep my head down. This really is ludicrous. Why in the hell are they interested in us? We get to the doors where I see a large black SUV with tinted windows waiting for us. The driver opens the door and I climb in with Joshua behind me. Max gets into a car behind us and Ben gets into the front seat and slams the door in a rush. My heart is racing and Joshua runs his hands through his hair in frustration.
Ben turns in his seat and smiles broadly at me. “Welcome to your new life in LA, Tash.”
Chapter 5
The car trip from the airport to Joshua’s house is uncomfortable to say the least. My hand is in his on his lap but he is silent and pensive as he stares out the window. It is late afternoon and rain is sprinkling in a depressing way, like the mood in this car. Our moment of intimacy when Joshua saw my outfit has disappeared and with it so has my optimism. What is he thinking about? My heart is aching for my beautiful man. Neither of us know what’s going on but one thing is strikingly clear: his mother has lied to him. Deceived both him and Cameron. Which one of the boys is a Stanton? I want to comfort him and tell him it’s a big mistake and that maybe he is adopted. Or maybe that his parents used donor sperm or something due to fertility problems, but we would both know deep down that it isn’t true. The fact that she had this conversation in the past with me cements that information. I am still unsure whether I have done the right thing or whether I should have just let them work it out for themselves. It would have come out eventually; the truth always comes out. Ben turns to look at Joshua and narrows his eyes as he thinks. He knows something is going on but obviously hasn’t been told what. I’m going to try to change the subject.
“Ben, do you care for Bridget?” I ask. Stuff it, I need a distraction and at least I will have some answers for Didge.
“Why do you say that?” he replies calmly in his beautiful South African accent as his eyes stay on the road.
I shrug. “Because she cares for you and I just wondered.” The driver’s eyes flick to me in the rear-view mirror.
Joshua smiles broadly and punches Ben in the back of the shoulder over the seat. “I told you.” He smirks.
I smile at Joshua. “Told him what?” I frown.
“That Didge is into him.” He smirks.
Ben drops his head. “I do care for Bridget,” he replies.
“So?” I frown.
He pauses as he thinks of an appropriate answer. “So I will be returning to Johannesburg eventually and…” He pauses again.
“And what?” I ask.
“Natasha, Bridget isn’t the type of girl who would be easy to leave.”
I smile. Oh wow, Ben really, really likes Bridget. I have big news for my beloved sister.
“Don’t listen to Cameron, you fuckwit,” Joshua sighs. The driver has a snicker to himself.
I frown at Joshua. “What does Cameron say?” I ask.
“He has warned Ben off Bridget for months, carries on like a big girl.” Joshua tutts.
“I don’t listen to Cameron,” Ben snaps. “But he has a point.”
I frown again. “What’s the point?” I ask.
Ben thinks about his answer again. “That your mother has already lost one daughter to overseas and she is not losing another one.”
My heart drops. Oh, Cameron is thinking of my mum. I don’t know whether to punch him or kiss him.
“Oh,” I whisper, shocked. “I wouldn’t worry. I don’t think Bridget is thinking of marriage and babies anytime soon Ben.,” I reply.
He nods and keeps looking straight ahead.
“You should just g
o for it,” Joshua asserts.
Ben shakes his head sadly. “No, I’m not starting something. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
Joshua sits up in his seat. “Did something happen?” he asks.
Ben keeps his eyes on the road. “No,” he replies in monotone. I smile broadly and nod my head at Joshua and he smirks and narrows his eyes at the back of Ben’s head. We continue up the road until we get to the large sandstone gates with the guard. It’s so weird having a gated community. I smile at Joshua who is watching me intently.
“What?“ I frown as I gently grab his hand in mine.
He smiles again and shakes his head as if amused about something.
I smile. “What?’ I ask again.
“I was just wondering if Carson is going to be waiting at my house when we get there.”
My face falls. “Are you serious?” I gasp.
He laughs and shakes his head. “No,” he replies.
Ben chuckles from the front seat. “Not funny, Joshua,” I huff. “That man is not on my list of favourite people.”
Ben turns. “I’m guessing you are not on his either.” He smiles.
Joshua laughs out loud again as I fake a smile and narrow my eyes. “You two are hilarious,” I mutter under my breath. We turn the corner into the street with the beautiful trees and arrive at Joshua’s space-age palace gates. I can feel my nerves rise. It’s been a long time since I have been here, and I wonder if anything has changed. We make our way up the circular driveway toward the huge dark charcoal rendered palace. Fuck. I had forgotten how impeccable this place is, although I do have to admit that after being at beautiful Kamala for the last week I am more prepared for this opulence than the first time I was here. The car pulls up and the girls’ car is in front of us parked near the front doors and Adrian and two of the guards are taking luggage out of the trunk. The girls are waiting for me and have their best we-fucking-hate-you looks on their faces. I giggle when I see them and jump out of the car.
They rush me as Joshua gets out of the other side of the car.
