He’d watched her at Steam. Seen her laughing with her co-workers, using that fabulous smile to defuse impatient customers and working her amazing behind off without a complaint. She had a goal and she was doing everything she could to reach it. She’d taken the same steps in her life that he had in his own. She’d found her own path and she’d done it without anyone else’s help.
There was a self-assurance about her now that went bone deep. She carried herself with confidence and poise and she hit him hard on so many levels he couldn’t even count them all.
But could the woman love him as the girl once had?
She took a sip of merlot and then ran her tongue across her bottom lip, chasing down a stray droplet of wine. His gaze locked on that action, and his body tightened, sending what felt like stray shots from an M16 ricocheting through his blood stream.
“Mike?” she said softly, calling him back as if he’d wandered off—as, actually, he had.
In his image-filled mind, they were no longer seated in the quiet, upscale restaurant. They were instead rolling around on a big bed, naked, sweaty and locked together. And no way did he want to leave that image for the stilted reality of the present situation.
“Yeah,” he muttered thickly, reaching for his cup of after-dinner coffee. He took a quick gulp, set the cup back down on the table and forced a smile. “Sorry.”
“Where’d you wander off to?” she asked. “Nice place?”
“I think so.”
She smiled, slowly, slyly, as if she knew exactly what he’d been thinking. Mike’s blood pumped even harder as he asked himself what the hell was going on. One day she’s ready to fry his ass for the mistakes made years ago—and the next she was looking at him like she wanted to lap him up.
Well, hell. Did it really matter what was happening here? Wouldn’t he rather have her smiling than shouting at him?
Oh, yeah.
“I was just asking you about being a SEAL,” she prompted.
“Right.” A SEAL. His job. The one mainstay in his life. His gaze locked on her full lips again, and coherent speech died a quick death. “It’s good.”
She laughed, and the sound was silky, draping itself around him in a tantalizing web that only strengthened the need rippling within.
“Could you vague that up for me?”
He smiled. “I like it. I’m good at it.”
“I bet you are.”
“How’d you know about me being on a SEAL team, anyway?”
“Colleen’s kept me posted,” she said, with a small shrug, “at times, whether I wanted her to or not.”
“Yeah?”
She took another long sip of her wine, and Mike’s gaze locked on her mouth again. Couldn’t seem to look away.
“So why the SEALs?”
He sucked in a deep breath, and prayed that there was enough blood left in his brain to keep it working for a while longer. And prompted by Kelly’s question, Mike’s thoughts turned to the Navy. The SEALs and his team members—his family.
Smiling, he said, “I wanted the SEALs because they’re the best. Because you have to work your butt off to prove you deserve to be one of them. And once you’re in…”
“Yes?”
“You’re a part of something that’s bigger than anything you can imagine.” He fought for a way to explain the incredible sense of worth that being a SEAL had given him. But there were no words important enough. So he kept searching as he said, “It’s tradition. And honor. And respect—for the service and for your team members.”
She watched him, and he saw understanding flash in her eyes and he was grateful for it. The Navy would always be a bone of contention between them, since he’d walked out of their last argument, had one too many beers and signed up. But he had to believe it had been the right thing to do. For both of them.
He studied her eyes. The eyes that had haunted him and were with him still. Those cool green depths looked fathomless. Like staring at the surface of the sea—he knew there were wonders hidden, all he had to do was dive in and find them. But to do that, they had to clear up the past first. Taking a chance, he followed his gut and splintered the easy feel between them.
“I joined the Navy looking for—”
“Escape?” she asked and her gaze flickered brightly with a flash of old hurt and anger.
“No,” he said, reaching across the table for her hand. His fingers closed around hers, and he held on when she would have pulled free. He had to make her understand that he hadn’t been running from her, but toward something else. “No, I was looking for purpose, I think. We were so young, Kel.” He shook his head and shrugged at the mistakes of the past. “I didn’t have a clue about what to do with my life beyond loving you.”
She flinched, but recovered quickly. “And that wasn’t enough?” Her voice sounded small, as if the words had escaped her throat before she’d had the chance to cut them off at the pass.
His answer would hurt her, but damn it, wasn’t it time they said everything they should have said six years ago? “No, it wasn’t.”
Again she tugged at her hand, but he held her fast. Her shoulders stiffened and she lifted her chin in the patented Kelly O’Shea fighting tilt. Hell, he’d missed their arguments almost as much as he’d missed loving her. And now that he’d started, he had to finish.
“I loved you, Kelly. Always did. From the first time I saw you.”
Her mouth worked, and he thought he caught the shine of tears in her eyes before she blinked them back.
“But it wasn’t enough—not for either of us. Hell, I didn’t even have a good enough job.” Back then he’d been working at a friend’s auto repair shop and wondering what the hell to do when he grew up.
“We could have made it.”
“Maybe,” he conceded, though he’d often wondered if hard times would have cemented them together or shattered what they’d had, “by giving up everything we wanted.”
“I wanted you,” she pointed out.
“You also wanted college,” he said, his words hushed but hurried. “You wanted to help kids. It’s a good dream, Kelly.”
“And I’m making it happen.”
“Yeah, but if we’d got married then, maybe you wouldn’t have.”
She laughed shortly, harshly. “Oh. So you dumped me for my sake.”
“I didn’t dump you.”
“No? What was joining the Navy, then?”
“Looking for a future for myself.”
“Not for us?”
It was hard to say aloud what he’d finally realized himself years after leaving Savannah. “There couldn’t be an us until there was a me.”
She yanked her hand free and leaned back in the padded, black leather booth. Her pale skin and dark red hair stood out against the dark fabric like a match struck in the shadows. She was all fire and light and, God, he wanted her back in his life.
He’d lived without her for six long years, figuring that she’d never be willing to see him again, talk to him again. He’d gotten occasional updates on her from Colleen but hadn’t tried to see her. Not after that one and only time.
A cowardly thing from a man who made his living bravely facing down dangers that most people never had to deal with. But Kelly had always been both his weakness and his greatest strength. She could bring out the best and the worst in him, and sometimes the two of them together were more flammable than anything else.
But then, what was life without a little excitement?
A damn boring proposition.
Kelly folded her arms across her chest, obliterating his view of her cleavage, and scrubbed her hands up and down her upper arms as if fighting a chill. “Okay, Mike, if you were off building a future so we could be together, why did you never come to see me?”
He rested both forearms on the tabletop and leaned in. “I did, once. About two years after I joined up, I was in town and I went to see you at your folks’ house.”
She frowned.
“You were sitting on
the porch with a guy. You looked…” Damn cozy he wanted to say, remembering the flash of pure jealousy that had nearly swamped him as he watched that man drape an arm around her shoulder. “Like you’d moved on,” he said instead.
“What guy?”
“You want me to describe him?”
“Yes.”
“No problem,” Mike said. After all, the guy’s image was burned into his brain. “Tall, blond, thin moustache, beady eyes, weak chin.”
Kelly laughed and shook her head. “Nice.”
“It’s how I remember him.” He also remembered wanting to get out of the car and plow his fist into the guy’s face.
“Jerry Soper.”
“What gave it away,” he asked, “beady eyes or weak chin?”
“Blond,” she said with another shake of her head that sent those dark, soft curls into a dance around her face. “He was a friend. From school.”
“Looked like more than friends to me.”
“Is that now, or was it then, any of your business?”
“No,” he admitted, and the single word tasted bitter to him.
“So you tried to see me once in six years.”
He shifted on the seat and squinted across the room at their waitress. If this was going to erupt into one of their legendary “conversations” it’d be better to pay the bill and talk outside, away from innocent bystanders. But the waitress simply refused to look his way. Practicing her flirting skills on a busboy, the girl didn’t even notice Mike scowling at her.
Sighing, Mike turned back to face Kelly. “Every time I talked to Colleen, she’d tell me about this guy you were seeing or some other guy. I figured you were done with me. So I did you a favor and stayed clear.”
“Some favor.”
“Yeah, I’m battin’ a thousand.”
“You should have come and talked to me.”
“You wouldn’t have wanted to see me then any more than you did now.”
“Probably not,” she admitted, “but I deserved the chance to turn you down, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, you did,” he said, leaning back and scraping one hand across his face. “I should have come to see you, Kel. I wanted to.”
“That doesn’t make it okay that you didn’t.”
He looked at her, his gaze steady. “I’m here now.”
“Because Colleen sent you to Steam.”
“Okay, I give you that much. That first night was because of her. But I’m not here tonight because of Colleen.”
“I know,” she said, and sat forward, reaching for her coffee cup. “I just don’t know what to do about it. What to feel about it.”
He grabbed her hand again and turned it over, stroking the center of her palm with the tip of his thumb. So smooth. So soft. He knew her body well. Knew her every reaction. Knew where to touch her to make her moan. Now Mike watched as her eyes slid closed and her lips parted on a sigh.
“Why don’t we just let it play out?” he suggested. “See what happens.”
She opened her eyes and looked directly at him. “If we keep seeing each other, Mike, you know exactly what will happen.”
He stroked her skin a little harder and was pleased to see her gasp. “I’m counting on it, babe.”
His eyes were deep and dark and more tempting than anything Kelly had ever seen before. Mike himself was more…everything than he had been all those years ago. He was more sure of himself. There was an air of quiet confidence about him. He was taller and stronger and more imposing than she remembered, too. When they’d walked into the restaurant tonight, every woman in the place had turned to get a look at him.
Kelly couldn’t blame them. His voice was a low-pitched rumble that rolled across her defenses and flattened them. His touch was heat and silk and gentle strength. And when he smiled, it was all she could do to keep from leaping across the table at him.
Maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea after all. But the minute that thought blasted through her mind, she found herself defending the plan. She needed to be with Mike again. How could she ever hope to fall in love with someone else, if Mike was still haunting the corners of her mind and heart?
Answer…she couldn’t.
He’d etched himself into her memory and continued to linger there long after she’d wished him gone. And even when she managed to avoid thinking about him during the day, her subconscious tortured her in her dreams. There was no ignoring the impact he’d had on her life. There was no escaping the fact that he had been her first love—the love she’d thought would last a lifetime.
And the only way to convince herself it was over was to sleep with him again. To let reality crash down on her time-fogged memories and show them for what they were…a broken heart’s embellishment.
He pulled her hand close and bent his head to kiss the inside of her wrist. The tip of his tongue ran over her skin, and Kelly felt heat pool deep within her, making her want to squirm uncomfortably on the bench seat.
She managed to stop a shiver before it swept completely up her spine, but there wasn’t a darn thing she could do about her blood pressure. With every stroke of Mike’s thumb against her skin, with every tiny, nibbled kiss, she felt it climb. Her pulse pounding, heart racing, she tried to seriously rethink her excellent plan of seduction.
She’d wanted closure. She’d needed it. But every minute spent with Mike felt less like “goodbye” and more like “hello, big boy.” She listened to him talk about his work—what he could tell her, at least, and she saw the pride in his eyes. The satisfaction he felt in doing a job that was important—to everyone. And she couldn’t help thinking about the other sides of his job…the parts he skipped over—the dangerous parts. And she knew that long after he’d left Savannah again, she’d still be thinking about him, praying for his safety.
And she wondered, just who was seducing whom?
Chapter 6
Mike pulled into her driveway, threw the car into Park and shut off the engine. The air-conditioning died instantly, and the heat in the car built with every passing second.
He reached for her, but Kelly must have sensed what was coming. She opened her car door and stepped out. A moment later Mike did the same. Slamming the car door, he braced his forearms on the roof of his sister’s four-door compact and stared at Kelly. In the moonlight she looked even better than she had by candlelight. The soft, pale glow of the moon washed over her, illuminating her features and making her eyes shine as if lit from within. His breath caught in his chest and he wondered how in the hell he’d ever walked away from her.
Oh, he’d done the right thing—for both of them—he was sure enough of that. He’d found himself in the Navy. Found his place in the world. The past six years had shaped him, molded him, given him a sense of duty and pride he might never have found otherwise.
But the price had been high.
Kelly lifted her face into the soft breeze and inhaled deeply. “Smell that?” she whispered. “Jasmine.”
“Never smells the same anywhere else,” he said softly. The simple truth had an explanation that was just as simple. The scent of jasmine would forever be locked into memories of Kelly. Memories of soft summer nights, young passion and the flavor of kisses full of promises. Jasmine without Kelly was just…empty.
As she looked up at him, Mike felt the power of her gaze slam into him like a bunched fist to his midsection.
“What’s it make you think of?”
He knew what she was talking about. “That last summer,” he said, memories crowding his mind. “You and me. Down by the river. Or on your porch swing.”
She inhaled sharply and let the air slide from her lungs in a sigh. “Me, too.”
“I’ve missed you.” Never more than in the past few days, when he’d been so close to her and yet separated by years of hurt. He’d watched her work, seen her with her friends, and wished that she was as easy with him as she was with them. But he’d had his chance. Was it too late now to try again? Or would he be a fool not to make an attemp
t to win her back?
“Me, too,” Kelly said, giving him a fast shot of hope.
“So what do we do about it?”
“I’m not sure.” She lifted one hand and pushed her hair back from her face, and all Mike could think was that he wanted to do that. Wanted to fist his hands in her hair, drown in its silkiness.
“Kelly…” He came around the end of the car and stopped at her side. Reaching for her, he cupped his hands over her bare shoulders, concentrating on the smooth, soft feel of her. Everything in him urged him to pull her close, to wrap his arms around her and hold on until the rest of the world fell away. Until the past no longer hung like a thick fog between them, obliterating the present and shrouding the future that could still be. But caveman tactics wouldn’t work with Kelly. Never had.
He smiled to himself, remembering all the times she’d gone toe-to-toe with him, never backing down, giving as good as she got. There were guys in the SEALs who would never go up against Mike Connelly—but Kelly O’Shea would take him on in a heartbeat.
God, he loved that about her.
“Take a walk with me,” he said, letting one hand slide down the length of her arm to capture her long, slender fingers.
“Now?” she asked, a smile peeking at the corner of her mouth. “In this heat?”
“You’re a Southerner, Kelly. Heat never stopped you before.”
She looked up at him and he held his breath. He didn’t want the night to be over yet. He wanted to be with her. To walk beside her the way he used to. To feel her hand in his and know that sweet rush of satisfaction he’d only felt when he was with Kelly.
“Okay,” she said. “Where?”
“You know where,” he countered, already turning for the sidewalk, drawing her along with him.
The Dare Affair: Summer In Savannah Anth. (Dynasties: The Danforths Book 6.5 Page 11
