by Kasey Krane
I didn’t feel like sitting down, so I paced around the room.
“You’re the one who has shown up out of the blue five years later.”
She sighed and shook her head.
“I went to live with my aunt’s family. I’d never met them before, so they were basically strangers to me. My dad spoke to them and made the arrangements.”
“And you just followed his command.”
“I had no other choice, Aidan.”
“Yes you did. You could have come to me. You could have told me how they were guilt tripping you. Unless you agreed with them.”
Her green eyes grew larger as she stared back at me. I stood very still, waiting for an answer. I needed to know if she agreed with her parents.
Leah finally broke the gaze and looked away.
“Of course I didn’t agree with them, Aidan. I was in love with you.”
Tears filled her eyes. She refused to look at me, and I could see she was embarrassed by her own emotions. She didn’t want to cry in front of me, and all I wanted to do was wipe away her tears.
I didn’t care about someone crying. In fact, I had no patience for it. Except when Leah cried.
I wanted her to stop. I was on the verge of promising her the world. I’d give her everything she wanted—as long as I didn’t have to see her cry.
She hurriedly rubbed her cheeks in an attempt to stop.
She stared at me again, clutching the bottle of beer tightly.
“I was very young and very stupid, Aidan. I made a big mistake.”
Maybe I pushed it too hard. Maybe Leah was right. How many times was she going to apologize? Hadn’t she done it enough? When would I be satisfied?
Maybe I could never forgive her.
Maybe this was never going to work.
I didn’t even know what she wanted from me. Why was she here?
“Would you have returned if it wasn’t for your mother’s illness?” I asked.
She stared at the bottle in her hands—in an effort to avoid looking at me. Then she looked up and licked her lips.
“I don’t know how to answer that question truthfully, Aidan. I have worked very hard the last five years to try and forget about you. I never came back here because I knew I’d come running straight into your arms if I did. I didn’t think it would be fair on you.”
“What makes you think I’d take you back?” I growled, narrowing my eyes at her.
“That’s not what I was expecting. I still don’t expect it. I just…thought it would be for the best if we both moved on with our lives. The way you have been doing.”
I emptied the beer from my bottle down my throat. I wanted her again. Already.
Watching her sitting curled up on my couch like that made my cock throb. She wasn’t wearing any underwear. Despite the long length of the shirt, her pussy was still on full display. The tastiest, juiciest pussy I had ever taken possession of.
I didn’t know how long she would be here. If she would ever be mine again. I wanted her now. Before time ran out.
“So you came back for your mother, and I’m just a side note.”
Leah shook her head.
“I came back for mom because I felt it was a part of my duty as a daughter, a part of my moral obligation. But you’re not a side note. You’re just…something I couldn’t resist. No matter how much I tried to leave you alone. I thought I was doing it for your sake. I thought I could come here and you would never find out about it. But I had to see you.”
My shoulders heaved as I glared at her. Maybe she was right—it would have been easier in so many ways if she hadn’t made that phone call. I wouldn’t be in the mess I was in right now if I never saw her again.
“I’m sorry if I’ve made your life more complicated, Aidan. I wish I was strong enough to resist the temptation of seeing you again,” she continued.
I stood against the wall, knocking my head back on it and staring at the ceiling.
“You can stop apologizing to me now,” I replied.
I believed her. I believed she had done what she thought she had to do.
I blamed her parents for everything.
Leah got off the couch, put her bottle down on the floor and came towards me. The closer she came to me, the weaker I felt. She walked slowly, all sexy, staring at me from under her heavy lids.
I was falling for her again. For her beauty and her smile, for that amazing curvy body of hers, for the softness of her voice. It fucked with my head because I couldn’t get away from the other problem.
The problem of the Barons.
I would have to bring it up at some point. She owed me an explanation for what she was doing with that guy. But I didn’t want to ask her right now.
She put her arms around me and I pulled her in for a kiss.
I was a sucker for those plump luscious lips.
I kissed her hard and she sighed.
My hand slipped under the shirt and I touched her wet swollen pussy. She was ready for me.
“Friends again?” she asked, biting on her lip. A smile tugged the corners of her mouth.
“I don’t ever want to be friends with you,” I growled, flipping her around.
It took me ten seconds to pull down my pants as she positioned her ass up against my thighs.
I could feel the warmth and juiciness of her opening.
I thrust my cock in her pussy and we both groaned with pleasure.
I had her by her waist, wrapping my arms around her while she bent down in front of me. My legs banged against her chunky bouncing ass. My cock pounded her from behind. Her moans became louder and louder with every thrust.
Our bodies moved together, moving with each other.
I rammed into her, hard and fast until I was ready to explode.
I wasn’t waiting for her this time. I needed to come. I needed to lay claim of her.
But she came with me. My cum shot into her and she cried out my name. She shook and moaned as she came. I emptied myself in her and then pulled her up so that she stood straight.
Her back was slick against me, damp. I wrapped my arms around her, pressing her tits, feeling the soft curves of her torso. She twisted herself around so she could look up at me.
“I don’t care what we decide to do tomorrow, Aidan. I’m just happy to spend tonight with you,” she said.
I took her mouth again and kissed her.
I wasn’t going to admit it out loud, but I felt the same way.
At this moment—I didn’t give a damn what the truth with the Barons was. I lived in the past tonight and it felt good.
Fourteen
Leah
Everything about this night with Aidan turned out to be a dream come true for me.
This couldn’t be real!
Not only was the sex amazing, but it seemed like tonight was the first time since my return that he actually opened up to me.
He told me categorically that I shouldn’t have to apologize to him anymore. He kissed me like he still cared about me, and he fucked me like he’d forgotten how much he loved my body.
This body always belonged to him, and I hoped he knew it.
But this was also a mistake.
I hopelessly led him on—knowing at some point, the truth would come tumbling out and he’d find out did this to get close to him. Because I had an ulterior motive.
While we lay together in his bed, staring up at the dark ceiling in his bedroom—I felt waves of guilt wash over me.
Aidan weaved his hand with mine. We clung to each other with our fingers. He carried me to his bed from the living room. And now, I couldn’t get close enough to him.
We made small talk. Reminisced about all our old memories. The people we used to hang out with back then, who were mostly his friends. How exciting it was to sneak around behind my parents’ backs. How crazy and wild those drunken nights used to be.
No man in this town would have touched me, or even so much as looked at me because they all knew I was taken. I was t
aken by Aidan Doherty.
But I couldn’t smile wholeheartedly now, knowing this was just temporary.
When Aidan found out about my connection with the Barons, not only would he find a way to punish me, but he’d never forgive me—he would hate me. I couldn’t stand the thought of him hating me.
I wish I never came back here.
I was willing to spend a lifetime without him, without a night like this, just as long as he didn’t find out I betrayed him. That I worked with his enemy. It didn’t matter that it was against my will. Aidan wouldn’t understand and he wouldn’t forgive it.
Worst of all was the realization that I was falling for him all over again.
I couldn’t just distance myself from the sex and the reality of being here with him, lying this close to him. I knew I wouldn’t just be able to forget about it the next morning. I would carry this feeling with me forever.
I had fallen in love with Aidan for all the right reasons. He was sexy and strong, but most of all, he actually cared about me. He thought I was beautiful and special. He wanted to keep me safe.
And now, I could see that those reasons hadn’t changed.
I was still in love with him.
And that really hurt.
I must have been lying awake beside him for over an hour.
At some point, after we’d been talking for ages, Aidan drifted off to sleep.
I’d always been able to sense when he fell asleep beside me. His body became heavier and his breathing softer. He was on his side, with his face turned to me. I could see his shoulders gently rising and falling. He looked even more handsome now.
I stared at him in the dim light of his bedroom, wanting desperately to touch him. But I knew I needed to leave him alone.
I moved around beside him a little, just to test if he would react, but he didn’t. He was sleeping peacefully and then it struck me—he trusted me. He actually trusted me.
That made it even harder for me to do what I was about to do.
I’m sorry I mouthed the words, being careful not to make a sound.
It had to be done. As much as I didn’t want to do it.
I slipped out of bed and tiptoed out of the bedroom, checking over my shoulder every moment to make sure the coast was still clear.
I wore his shirt, which smelled intensely of him. It made me feel even more guilty because it was like he was constantly around me, with his arms around my shoulders.
I tiptoed into the room at the end of the hallway. I hadn’t been in there but I figured it was his study. He used to store boxes there earlier when he first moved in.
The door wasn’t locked and I was able to step in easily. I shut it behind me and switched on the table lamp.
It was the messiest room in the apartment. Aidan clearly used this space to dump everything he thought was important or would need later, but he hadn’t taken the time to organize it.
I didn’t even know what I was looking for, which would make it even harder for me to find anything useful in the mess.
I looked through boxes that were stowed around the room. All of them contained massive piles of paper.
Business holdings, contracts, legal documents and certificates. It didn’t look like much to me, but I figured it would be useful to Aldo Baron.
I’d remembered to grab my phone before leaving the bedroom so while I rooted through the boxes, I decided to take photographs of everything that looked remotely informational.
Snap snap snap.
I snapped pictures of the pages without thinking or stopping to consider them. Hopefully this stuff would keep the Barons off my back for some time. All I tried to do was buy time.
I lifted up another box to look through it and a bunch of Polaroids slipped to the floor. Cursing under my breath, I knelt down to pick them up. They looked like family pictures.
They were old and a few of them had Aidan’s mother in them. I knew about her and how she’d died. Aidan never liked talking about her because he was very young when she was murdered, and it was a deep wound in him that had never healed.
My heart ached when I saw her in those photographs—how beautiful she looked.
The pictures had small notes at the back—names of the people in the photographs along with the date.
Aidan looked adorable with his brothers as a little boy. He had the same blue eyes and handsome smile. Then I came across a baby photo of him. It was obviously taken in the hospital right after he was born. He was in his mother’s arms with his father looking down at him proudly.
My heart stopped in my chest because I recognized that baby immediately. He was the spitting image of the boy I had given birth to.
I was alone that day when my baby boy was born.
When I say that, I mean I didn’t have anyone around me whom I actually knew. Of course, there were nurses and doctors who had tended to me, but in reality—I felt completely alone.
I wasn’t prepared for pregnancy, and similarly, I wasn’t prepared for childbirth either. I hadn’t known what to expect.
I’d been shielded from everything in my home and even when my mother found out about the pregnancy, she hadn’t given me any helpful information.
The aunt and her family I was living with resented me for my actions. Just like my parents, they were deeply religious too and despised me for being a ‘fallen woman’.
So when I went into labor, they just drove me to the hospital and left me there. I had to fend for myself.
I was in pain. Dazed and confused. I didn’t know how I would pay the hospital bills. I didn’t know how I was going to be a mother or what would happen to my child once he was born.
Would my aunt be willing to provide for him? Let him live in the small room with me? Where would I go if they kicked me out? How would I make ends meet?
Despite the fear and the pain, the loneliness and the regret—I couldn’t help but also feel joyous and excited at the prospect of finally getting to meet this person who had been growing inside me.
I was terrified that I would fall in love with this baby, because if I did, I wouldn’t be able to do what I knew was the right thing.
I had to give him away. It was the only chance this baby had at having a good life where he would be nurtured and cared for. I couldn’t give him that. I knew I wasn’t capable. I had no means. I didn’t have a job. No support system.
It was Aidan’s name I continued to whisper and scream through labor. I regretted leaving. I regretted following my parents’ commands and I knew it was too late now. Aidan wouldn’t forgive me for not telling him about the baby.
I felt like my body was being ripped open, I couldn’t stop crying, I couldn’t make it stop. I wanted the baby to stay where it was, but that wasn’t going to happen…
And then, there was calm.
The baby was born. Everyone in the delivery room congratulated me on the birth of my beautiful boy. They placed him in my arms.
He had his father’s blue eyes, wisps of silky chestnut hair and the same handsome smile. I recognized him immediately. It was like I had known him my whole life.
My worst fears came true. Without any control over myself—I fell in love with him.
And while I held him in my arms as he slept there peacefully, cocooned in my fierce adoration of him—I made the decision that would change my life forever. A decision that was an easy one because I loved him so much.
I had to give him up.
I couldn’t take any more pictures.
Hurriedly, I put all the photographs back in the box where I found them. I rushed out of the room, regretting everything.
How could I do this to the father of my child?
What choice did I have?
I went to the bedroom and slipped in. Thankfully, Aidan was still asleep.
I hid my phone in the pile of my own clothes on the floor and got into bed beside him.
He moved and partially opened his eyes as I sank closer to him.
“Hi,” he groaned in a sl
eepy voice.
“Hi. I got thirsty,” I whispered.
He threw an arm around me and pulled me to him. He felt safe and warm, and I melted in his embrace.
I turned away from him so he could spoon me, covering me with his body. It had been a long since the last time I felt this good. But every chance I got to close my eyes, I saw our son’s face.
He had been asleep in my arms too when the nurse came and took him away. He was adopted immediately by a couple who were waiting there in the hospital for me to give birth. The nurse wanted the baby to bond with his new parents, to form an attachment with his new mother.
So I barely had a few minutes with him. I fought against every natural instinct I had. I wanted to keep holding him. I thought about what Aidan would have done if he knew…if he was there. He would never give up our son.
Tears ran down my face as I lay there beside him.
Our son was out there somewhere…in all likelihood, happy. But I was here heartbroken and miserable. Lying in his father’s arms who didn’t even know he existed.
I didn’t deserve to be forgiven for the things I had done.
Fifteen
Aidan
She was already awake when I woke up the next morning.
Lately, I had fallen into a habit of waking up hungover with a throbbing ache racing at the back of my head. This morning was different in every way.
I felt fresh and light, like I didn’t have a care in the world.
Even back when she was in high school, we didn’t get this chance often—to wake up together. She always had to go back to her parents home because they’d ground her if they found her missing from her bedroom.
This morning felt like a special treat.
Leah was putting on her clothes, facing away from me with her bare body bathed in the sunshine pouring in through my window. She hadn’t noticed me sitting up in bed. She didn’t know I was watching her.
I couldn’t help but admire her beauty. Her full hourglass shape. The way that blue dress slid smoothly down over her body, covering that million dollar ass.
