by Jami Gray
Earlier, when she asked who choose to save her, the man or the wolf, he gave her the truth. Both. Neither one could bear to let her go. Yet, life taught him some harsh lessons. Love did not conquer all. And sometimes love, no matter how strong, could warp and break even the strongest couples.
Savage memories rose, seeking cracks in his emotional walls. He ignored them, focusing on the issues Xander pointed out in their discussion. She wanted him to leave his end of the bond open, but there was no way he could drop all his barriers. Not even for her. She was the only one who looked at him as if he were whole, as if there was more to Warrick Vidis than alpha of the Motoki Pack. He couldn’t lose her. If he let her see every inch of him and his wolf, she would realize how little of the man really existed and just how in control his wolf really was.
An alpha did not remain an alpha because he was compassionate. An alpha was, to borrow Neil’s words, the top dog because he was ruthless, conniving, and would protect his wolves through any means necessary. And for the one they considered their mate, there was no line they wouldn’t cross.
Xander was a warrior, ruthless in her own way, but under it all, lay a core of loyalty and compassion that kept him warm. She would protect her mate and children against all threats, just as she did the pack. Her need to be his partner echoed through their bond, but even if his human side understood, his wolf’s primary drive was to keep her safe. She was his to protect.
If he let her stand beside him, their enemies would target her to get to him. And therein lay the problem. Xander would always be his weakness. It didn’t matter if she could hold her own against all sorts of foes, it would take just one mistake on his part and she’d be gone.
The incident in Arizona drove that fact home. He had been subconsciously tracking her through his pack ties. Uneasy and tense, he had paced for hours before she let him in. Her fear at facing something threatening not just her life, but her connection to the pack sent him running. He left the pack without notice, traveled hundreds of miles to invade another alpha’s territory, and raced into an unknown situation because she was in danger.
He hadn’t been thinking about the pack as he cradled her broken body. As his rage turned into a living, encompassing demon he hadn’t given a thought to the repercussions of invading Chavez’s territory without Ryuu or Sebastian. But when Raine killed Chavez’s deranged mate, Warrick had gloried in the vicious satisfaction flooding his veins. He sure as hell hadn’t considered the consequences of bonding Xander to him, heart and soul.
Xander’s hip brushed his shoulder again. He leaned in a little, needing her touch. What was done was done. Now he needed to figure out how to deal with the woman beside him without destroying them both.
Raine and Xander herded him across the dark street. They moved past the semi-clean front stoop of the mission and down the side of the building to the narrow alley behind it. The alkaline scent of stale urine mixed with rancid trash, seasoned with a hint of kerosene, drifted from partially empty brown bottles nestled along the alley’s edges. Warrick sneezed as the nauseous brew stung his nose and his ears flattened.
Xander met his baleful look, ignoring the glee Raine didn’t bother hiding. “Beggars can’t be choosers.”
He chuffed in disagreement.
White trash bags leaned against the rusted steel door. Grabbing the first one, Xander made quick work of finding a pair of ripped jeans and an oil stained T-shirt, with a drunken clam printed on the front. Setting them aside, she cupped his face, making sure he was paying attention. “Hurry and change,” she told him. He stood there, watching her tug Raine out to the alley’s entrance. “C’mon, Raine, the smell is making me sick.”
Like it was any better for him? He turned to look at the outfit she had chosen and leaned down to sniff at the clothes. A faint scent of detergent teased his nose. At least whoever left these had washed them first. He turned back to see Xander give Raine a push as she slouched against the brick wall. She looked at him and mouthed, Hurry up, before giving him her back.
He sighed and reached for the shift. The familiar wrenching of muscles and sinew didn’t interfere with his ability to eavesdrop on the conversation between the two women.
“So.” Raine tucked her hands into her jacket pockets. “Finally forgave him, huh?”
Xander closed her gritty eyes and let her head bump against the brick at her back. “There was nothing to forgive.”
“Good.”
The wealth of sincerity in that one word had Xander blinking her eyes open. All signs of Raine’s earlier humor were gone, replaced by an unnerving intensity. Puzzled, Xander asked, “What am I missing?”
Raine shook her head. “Nothing. It’s just…” She dropped her gaze and hunched her shoulders. “Even if I had realized what Vidis was going to do, I wouldn’t have stopped him.” Her lips clamped tightly closed and she lifted her head to met Xander’s gaze almost belligerently.
It took a moment for Raine’s seemingly out of context statement and ill-at-ease body language to click. Raine, who never apologized for anything, was looking for forgiveness. She and Gavin were the ones to find Xander in Arizona. Between the two of them, they held her body and spirit together until Warrick’s arrival. Warrick tried everything to keep Xander with him, but when it looked as if he was going to lose her, he used Raine’s unpredictable magic to repair the damage the Soul Stealer had done to Xander’s spirit. As with most things Raine touched, the results were anything but normal. When all was said and done, Warrick and Xander were indelibly linked.
For some reason, Raine now thought she had to apologize for her actions. Xander racked her brain for some pithy comment to snap the uncomfortable tension, but drew a blank. As the only two females in the Wraiths, girly heart-to-heart talks weren’t easy for either of them. Yet, Xander’s friendship with Raine was an unexpected boon. In the predatory warrior, Xander found a kindred spirit, someone who understood the bloodier aspects of their world but was just as much at a loss when it came down to the whole male-female relationship thing.
“I’m glad you didn’t stop him,” Xander finally answered.
Although Raine tried, she didn’t fully succeed in hiding her relief at Xander’s response.
Xander bit back a small grin and turned her attention back to the night-shrouded street. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Do you and Gavin—” Xander stopped, uncertain how to continue. Trying again, she said, “You and Gavin share…”
When the pause began to stretch, Raine prodded, “A love for good food? A taste for sharp-edged weapons? What?”
Her flippant questions caused Xander to choke back a laugh. “No, you idiot. The tie between you two, how do you manage?”
When Raine didn’t immediately respond, Xander turned and met Raine’s shrewd gaze. As if that was what she had been waiting for, Raine finally asked, “Manage what?”
Xander grimaced. “To stay separate. To stay…you.”
“Trial and error.”
The simple answer set her back. “That’s it?”
“What? You were expecting Dr. Phil?”
Before Xander could respond, the sound of a quiet male curse cut through the night. She and Raine turned to the alley in time to watch Warrick limp toward them as he pulled the T-shirt on over his head.
Xander sucked in a breath. No man should look that good in torn jeans and a ratty T-shirt. Even as the thin material drifted down to hide the sculpted muscles of his chest and stomach, images she stuffed in a box over the last few weeks began to leak out. They teased her with tactile memories of running her fingers and tongue over that intriguing map.
“Shoes.”
The word emerged as a growl, jerking her gaze up only to be caught by the flash of answering heat and hunger that added a wickedly seductive element to his savage stare.
“You’re drooling,” Raine said, sotto voice.
“Don’t care,” Xander muttered.
“Do you remember what I
asked you in Arizona?” Raine asked, a hint of laughter in her voice.
“You asked a lot of things in Arizona,” Xander said.
“Smart ass.” Raine bumped her shoulder into Xander’s. “So has your answer changed?”
Dragging her gaze away from Warrick’s hypnotic pull, she wracked her brain to remember what Raine was referring to. “Answer to what?”
Raine tilted her head, all traces of her earlier humor wiped away. “Is it worth it?”
As Warrick came to a stop in front of them, she looked right at him, knowing he heard every word. “Yes.”
Chapter Eight
After leaving Raine at her car with plans to meet up at Taliesin the next morning, Xander led Warrick over to her bike. “So where to next?”
“Home.”
At his abrupt answer, she stilled for a moment and narrowed her gaze, fighting not to turn around. “Home?”
He stepped closer, trapping her between him and the bike. Even though he kept a deliberate sliver of space between them, the heat of his body wrapped around her. It tempted her to lean back, to let the night’s events catch up and pull her under, safe in the knowledge he’d be her anchor. That seductive promise of safety was part and parcel of his draw as an alpha. They were the ultimate protectors.
But who would protect him? The insidious whisper left behind a tendril of worry. They were no closer to identifying the threat or the mastermind running the show.
Behind her, Warrick leaned in, setting his hands on the bike’s seat and locking her in a cage of skin and heat. A fine tension sang through her. Against her shoulders, she could feel his muscles bunch as he nuzzled the patch of skin where her neck and shoulder met. Exposed by the too-large sweatshirt, it was vulnerable to the onslaught of his warm breath and the whisper-soft brush of his lips. Her pulse skipped a beat.
Hungry for the small touches she had denied both of them for so long, she closed her eyes, resting her head against his shoulder, granting him even more access. Her body melted into his.
He wrapped an arm around her waist, anchoring her as sweet sensations piled one on top of another, dragging her into a world where only his touch mattered. A helmet hung forgotten in one hand as she curled her free hand over his wrist, digging her nails in as he hit a particularly sensitive spot that wrung a low groan from her throat.
“Home,” he whispered. Her lashes fluttered open as he grasped her chin and turned her face to his. His skin was flushed with a nearly violent need. “No more challenges.” The command was given against her lips.
With a purely feminine thrill at his show of dominance, she let him take what he wanted, offering no resistance as his lips crushed hers. Lips and tongues dueled as she met each of his demands with her own, until they were both breathless. Her exhaustion, worries, and fears were crushed beneath a wave of intense desire.
When he finally let her go, she dragged cool night air into her lungs, hoping to clear her haze of need. Her lips felt swollen and her skin flushed. She blinked, trying to focus beyond their combined hunger.
He didn’t back away, crowding so close she could see the individual pinpricks of amber in his brown eyes. With no way to hide from the wolf or man, she didn’t try, standing still under his intense study.
Releasing his wrist, she cradled his jaw, shivering at the rasp of stubble against her palm, It took her two tries before she could clear the huskiness of want from her voice. “Let’s go home, alpha mine.”
At her capitulation, his eyes lit with a fierce satisfaction, while a devastatingly wicked grin warned her of the dangers ahead. He gave her enough room to get on her bike, before he settling in behind her.
Nervous excitement warred with an almost painful need, causing her hands to shake as she started the engine. Terror and desire sent her pulse racing as they sped through the darkness toward home. Tonight, Warrick would claim her, and she him.
Years ago Xander fell in love with Warrick’s house. The custom built log cabin sat at the end of a winding gravel drive on prime acreage nestled next to Forest State Park and acted as the pack’s central gathering place. His nearest neighbor was a couple miles away, and the isolation suited not just the man, but the pack as well. The old-growth forest gave plenty of room for hunting and playing under the light of the moon.
Tonight, she was grateful for the privacy as the Ducati’s engine fell silent. Her fingers trembled as she locked the helmets into place. Warrick’s heat at her back, and the soft brush of his lips against her neck rekindled the erotic storm from earlier.
“Warrick.” Her protest was drowned out by her groan as his teeth found a particularly responsive spot. Dear gods, it had been so long. Now she and her wolf wanted to bask in his touch, but first— “Inside. We have to get inside.”
He answered with a wordless hum as his quick hands delved under the baggy sweatshirt and wrapped around her bare waist.
She twisted until she could turn and face him. Curling her hands around his jaw, she dragged his head up, forcing him to meet her gaze. “I want a bed.” The words were breathless but clear.
Her demand broke through his desire and his eyes sparked. A wolfish grin curled his lips. “Fine.” His agreement was too close to a growl but at least he listened. He shackled her wrist and drew her behind him as he unlocked the front door and pulled her inside.
The interior was bathed in deep shadows. It was a good thing shifters could see well in the dark, because he wasn’t even taking the time to turn on any lights.
She barely noticed her surroundings as Warrick drew her past the living room and up the stairs to his bedroom. Her pulse began to pound as needy hunger coiled low and tight. She followed his broad back through the double doors of his bedroom. Stopping, she twisted her wrist, forcing him to let go.
He took a couple of steps forward then, with one rough move, yanked the stained T-shirt over his head, tossing it on the floor. She sucked in her breath as moonlight cast intriguing patterns over his back. The borrowed jeans barely held their place across his hips and clung to his very tight ass.
Before he could turn around, she closed in and curled her hands around his bare waist. Running her nose along his spine, she followed the teasing touch with little open-mouthed kisses. The feel of his skin under her hands and lips set every nerve on fire. She missed this. The freedom to touch, to taste.
His head fell forward and his hands covered hers as he let her play, his soft groan urging her to continue.
His back was an erotic canvas, his skin stretched across broad shoulders, defining the underlying muscles that flexed with his every move. With her hands trapped under his against his flat stomach, she pressed closer, using the only weapon left to her, her mouth.
She nipped and licked the taut expanse of his back. Her breathing roughened and desire spiked, threatening to shatter her fragile control. Soul-deep want rushed through her like a wild fire, searing away her emotional confusion. Sensation and emotions coalesced into a knee-weakening brew.
Tugging her hands free, she mapped each dip and rise of his muscled abdomen. Slow. She needed to take this slow, to savor each touch. It didn’t matter how touch-starved she and her wolf were, or how temptation sang along her veins, demanding she gorge—she needed to take her time.
Every delicate brush of skin over skin, every damp kiss drove the heat higher, sinking sensuous teeth deeper. Tonight, she and her wolf would take their mate and cement their bond because this man, this wolf was theirs.
Her emotions roared down their connection. A shudder went through Warrick and he looked over his shoulder, his voice rough. “Xander.”
Even in the dimly lit room she could see the taut line of his jaw and the red flush running along his cheekbones. His answering wave of need, want, love, and possession flowed back, causing her breath to catch at the whirlwind of his emotions, Yet the chaotic brew settled inside her and she held the precious gift close. For the first time, she caught a glimpse of what they could share as their bond flared into brilliant life
.
Amazingly, she could feel an echo of her touch and his need for more even as he held back, not wanting to scare her. Silly man. As if the erotic pictures rolling through his mind weren’t giving her ideas. It was wildly exciting to feel what she did to him. Heeding his reactions she gentled her touch here, deepened it there, making sure to discover what set his blood on fire. The storm of desire strengthened, becoming a force of nature. She let it take her under, uncaring if she broke under the pressure.
Instead, he broke first, capturing her exploring hands and turning to face her. With her wrists trapped in one hand, he cupped her face with the other. She tilted her head, burrowing deeper into his touch, nipping at his palm, craving his warmth.
He brushed his thumb over her bottom lip, causing her breath to catch and stutter. Her audible reaction drew a slow, tantalizing smile from him.
She shuddered as the pads of his fingers traced over the intricate lines of her tattoo, slowing when he found the rougher ridges of old scars hidden among the design. She tried to evade his touch, but stopped at his low growl.
He released her hands and cradled her face. “Someday, you’re going to tell me the story of these.”
Unable to look away, she managed to get out, “Why? It’s not that important.”
His smile faded and he nipped at her lower lip. “It’s part of you. It’s important.”
She blinked against the sudden pressure of tears his answer caused, and turned her face into his hands, hiding how deep his words hit.
His fingers brushed along her face once more. As whisper soft as his touch was, the depth of emotion behind it burned through skin and blood, leaving an indelible mark on her soul.
She licked her lips in a telling move, her tongue flicking over his finger as it completed its path.
