by Lois Richer
“Are you dreaming about Christmas, dear?” Aunt Margaret entered and poured herself a coffee.
“More like watching Ben and Vic. They had an argument.” She suddenly felt guilty for repeating that.
“So did Tillie and I. She wants to go downhill skiing. I think it’s too dangerous. At her age—at our ages—we shouldn’t take silly risks.” Frustration tightened Margaret’s lips.
Adele couldn’t help staring. She’d seldom if ever heard the aunts disagree. To see Margaret’s irritation now was upsetting.
“Why are you frowning, dear?” Margaret asked.
“It’s just—I’m surprised. I’ve never heard you and Tillie argue.”
“Well, we do. She’s a daredevil and that disturbs me.” Her aunt plunked the cream pitcher on the table as if to emphasize her words. Then she sighed. “I’ll get over it. I always do.”
“Oh.” Adele wasn’t sure what to say.
“I recall how arguing always bothered you. You always wanted harmony and peace. But some disagreement is healthy, Adele. Everyone has an opinion and to keep silent just to avoid an upset isn’t necessarily good. We must express our feelings and trust the ones we love will respect us for them,” Margaret murmured. “As we must respect theirs.”
“I guess.” Adele didn’t like this conversation. Quarreling always reminded her of her parents’ bitter feuds and how afraid she’d been as they escalated.
“You see, dear, it’s all in how you disagree. From the little you’ve told us in all these years, I doubt your parents disagreed with respect. They just vented and let their anger pour over the other person with no concern for their feelings. That demeans the other person. It doesn’t allow for their thoughts and feelings.” Margaret sipped her coffee but was clearly not finished. “If you love someone, you owe it to them to listen to what they have to say just as they owe it to you to do the same. Meanness of spirit has no place in disagreements. It all boils down to how you love others.”
“I understand, Auntie.” Adele spotted their campers tromping up the hill toward The Haven and checked on the frying bacon.
Maybe Aunt Margaret was right. Problem was Adele only remembered her parents’ claims of love. They said the words, but their actions didn’t show love. Her mother had claimed to love each successive husband, too, but those relationships had ended in bitter divorce. Sort of like the way Rafe had claimed he loved her and then lied to her.
But Victoria’s laughter and Ben’s full-bodied chuckle as they reentered the house a while later proved their quarrel had been resolved or at least tabled. Maybe their marriage was one of the few that could allow and survive arguments. For now anyway.
As she poured the waffle batter onto her griddle, Adele wondered if arguing would quash her new and unexpectedly tender feelings for Mac. Those were definitely not the best-friend kind of feelings.
“Delly?” Francie tugged on her apron to get her attention.
“Good morning, sweetie. You look nice.” But Adele saw trouble brewing in the little girl’s dark eyes.
“No, I don’t.” Francie’s arms crossed over her thin chest. “Franklyn said I’m fat. Franklyn’s stupid and mean.” Tears welled.
“Am not. And you are so too fat for that dress.” Thunderclouds roiled in Franklyn’s eyes. “Dummy.”
Adele heaved a sigh. More disagreements. Perfectly normal, Victoria and Aunt Margaret had both said. Which probably meant there’d be more of this in her future.
“That’s enough from both of you. We will not start our morning with nasty words.” Adele raised her eyebrows at both children. With a sigh they grudgingly apologized to each other. “Good. Now let me look at both of you. Oh, I see the problem.”
“What problem?” Francie demanded, smoothing her skirt.
“Sweetie, you and Franklyn have both grown. Your dress is a bit tight, just as Franklyn’s pants are a bit short. We need to get you some new clothes.”
“A Christmas dress?” Francie’s eyes expanded, her interest tweaked. “Sparkly like your top?”
“And c’n I get black pants like Mac’s?” Franklyn added. “With cowboy boots?”
“If Stella can stay late today, we’ll check out the stores this afternoon for school clothes. Okay?” With that issue settled, the twins plunked down on chairs at the table and began eating breakfast.
Stella arrived moments later, agreed to work late, and immediately began serving Adele’s fluffy waffles and a multitude of fruits and syrups to the young guests who were filing into the dining room. For a moment Adele’s world was at peace.
Then Mac burst through the back door.
“Delly, I’ve got the most fabulous idea,” he said in the most excited tone she’d heard from him in ages. “You have to hear me out.”
Her heart gave a jump for joy at the sight of him and her eyes couldn’t help lingering on his handsome face as her heart lifted. So much for peace and quiet.
“Good morning, Mac. Have a seat. We’re just serving breakfast.” She smiled and set a fully loaded plate on the table for him. At least she and Mac would never argue so hard it would fracture their friendship.
Suddenly her day seemed much brighter.
* * *
“It’s an amazing idea and I do want to hear more,” Adele said in a rushed tone. “But I have to take the twins to preschool now.”
“Yeah. Okay.” Mac was disappointed. “I guess I have a trail ride to lead, too.” He thanked Stella when she cleared away his plate. “Maybe I could pick up the twins after school. We could talk after that.”
“No!” Francie glared at him. “That’s when we’re goin’ shopping for my Christmas dress. Delly promised.”
“I promised we’d go shopping, Francie. I didn’t promise anything about a dress,” Adele corrected. He guessed she didn’t want to divulge her secret sewing project for the twins just yet.
“Shopping. Oh.” Not his favorite activity.
“After that we have practice for the kids’ Sunday school program.” Adele thought a moment, then suggested, “Later this afternoon?”
“Gabe and I have to, um, fill a beef order,” he said with a sideways glance at the twins. “But maybe after supper, if we’re finished.”
“Hmm. This group is leaving after their ride with you, but the church youth are coming for a sledding party tonight,” she mused aloud. “I have to be here to feed them. I can’t ask Stella to stay that late. Anyway, I’ll need her help with the dinner tomorrow night. The aunts always host it for the church choir. Text me,” she said. “Meanwhile I’ll muse on your new idea for a daylong ski clinic.”
Mac saw her glance at the clock before urging the children to get their coats on. Knowing he couldn’t hold them up, he followed them out.
“You really think Victoria will go for a daylong ski outing?” he asked when Adele finished belting in the kids.
“We’ll plan every detail so well she’ll have no doubts. Gotta go. See you.” She waved at him before driving away.
Restless, Mac played with Spot and Dot for a few minutes, throwing sticks they could fetch, laughing as they rolled in the snow as part of the game. Finally he walked to his truck, wishing he could get Delly’s input now. It struck him then that she was becoming more and more important in his plans.
“Yoo-hoo, Mac!” Tillie and Margaret’s faces were rosy with the cold—they were obviously returning from their morning walk. “Can we have a moment of your time?”
“Sure.” He followed them into The Haven, wondering what this conversation would be about. Once he’d hung their coats and his own, he trailed them into the family room, shrugging when Stella blinked in surprise at his reappearance. “How are you, ladies?”
“We’re wonderful,” Tillie exclaimed, eyes shining. “God is good.”
“Please, sit.” Margaret waved toward a chair, though she and Tillie claimed
the wingbacks closest to the fire. “We wondered how you’re doing, dear. Are you feeling closer to understanding God’s will for you?”
“We’ve been praying for that for you, Mac.” Tillie folded her hands and leaned forward to listen.
“Thank you. I’m not certain that what I’m doing is God’s plan for my future,” he began, struggling to organize his thoughts. “But so far the trail rides seem to be very popular.”
“Very.” Margaret smiled, then leaned her head sideways in a gesture for him to continue.
“Adele has helped me refine my general ideas and tailor each ride for the specific groups. I actually came over today to discuss a new idea I’ve had.” They looked at him expectantly. “I thought perhaps the older kids who come here needing a challenge might enjoy a daylong ski event through the woods.”
“Fantastic.” Tillie clapped her hands together, her excitement obvious.
“Are you sure you can handle it?” ever-practical Margaret asked.
“Gabe and I are going to do a couple of practice runs to make sure,” Mac explained, knowing the ladies were always concerned about the safety of their guests.
“Excuse me.” Tillie pulled her chiming phone out of her pocket and read the text. With a frown she passed her phone to Margaret.
“Oh, dear.” Margaret handed the phone back but said nothing more.
Suddenly uncomfortable, Mac hesitantly explained, “I’m hoping that tonight I can get Adele’s input on a couple of things to perfect my plan.”
The aunts glanced at each other, faces telegraphing something he didn’t understand.
“Is something wrong?”
“Adele might be unavailable for a bit.” Tillie sounded sad.
“Why?” Immediately Mac’s radar went on high alert. “The twins?”
“Gina.” Margaret sighed. “That was Adele’s text. She just received a phone call with more disappointing news about locating her sister. We’re to ask Stella to take over for a while. Adele said she needs some time off this morning.”
For Adele to deliberately escape cooking—Mac had never heard her do that before. Which meant his best friend had been decimated by whatever she’d just learned. He bit his lip, wishing he’d been nearby to at least comfort her.
“On the other hand, thinking about your idea might be just the thing to take our girl’s mind off her troubles,” Tillie murmured thoughtfully.
“Perhaps it would. Momentarily.” Margaret sighed. “It’s so frustrating that she can’t find out anything about Gina. I wonder what God’s doing. And how we can help.”
“Remember, sister, James said, ‘If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.’ Let’s go ask him.” Tillie patted Mac’s shoulder. “You’ll excuse us, won’t you, son? It’s time we prayed for our Adele.”
“I have to go, too.” Mac drove to the ranch, deep in thought. The aunties wanted to help Adele, but so did he. He was supposed to be her best friend. There had to be something he could do.
He walked inside the house for a cup of coffee and to think. Spying his Bible, he recalled Tillie’s comments. He grabbed it and thumbed through the pages until he came to the first book of James. Verse five was the portion Tillie had quoted. He read further.
“But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering.”
Okay, that was clear enough. If Mac wanted to help Adele, he could ask God to show him how. But what if... His eyes riveted on the last part of verse six.
“For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.”
Was that what was wrong with his prayers? That he hadn’t truly expected God would answer him, would show a way to be free from the load of guilt he carried, a way to run the ranch the way God wanted, to be Adele’s good friend?
“I have to do something to help her. She’s helped me so often, cheering me on, encouraging me when I didn’t think I could do it. She always comes up with great ideas that enhance mine.”
For a few minutes Mac let himself enjoy the flutter of joy inside that thoughts of this special woman always brought. Each day he cherished their times together more, so much so that he couldn’t fathom not always having Adele in his world, in his corner.
And when she knows the truth about your “accident?” his brain prodded. When she understands that this so-called best friend of yours still hasn’t heard your apology? That you haven’t even bothered to see him? That you have a medal you don’t deserve? That you’ve never owned up to causing that accident?
Adele would be appalled by his silence. Mac could visualize disappointment filling those amber eyes, feel her pain as she tried to hide her disenchantment with him. He could almost feel the empty chasm yawning inside when she began avoiding him.
Just thinking about Adele not being there was like a knife to the heart. And yet, he couldn’t tell her the truth. Not yet.
Instead Mac bowed his head and asked for God’s leading, so they could find Gina. He’d barely breathed the prayer when the name of his buddy who did private investigation flickered through his mind. Though almost certain the guy was still unavailable, Mac decided to text him and ask for ideas on how to locate Adele’s long-lost sister on their own. For a moment his faith wavered, but he gritted his teeth and repeated the ending of verse six. “For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.” That was James’s advice.
Mac was pulling on his boots moments later when his phone chimed.
Simplest thing is to place an ad in big city papers asking for information.
Calling himself an idiot for not having thought of it, Mac paused. This was an answer to his prayer. It wasn’t about him; it was about God showing him what to do. Heart lightening, he abandoned his boots and went to his computer, where he composed a short ad giving his email address if anyone had information.
Satisfied that he’d finally found a concrete way he could help Delly, Mac pulled on his outerwear and hurried to assist Gabe with this afternoon’s riders. But though he worked hard to keep his mind on the youth and his horses, Mac couldn’t dislodge the niggling voice inside his head.
You’re still hiding the truth. Helping Adele won’t be enough when she finds out who you really are.
* * *
“It was a great afternoon. Thank you, Mac. The kids really enjoyed it. Too bad Adele couldn’t make it. The ice fishing idea was hers,” Victoria said three days later, ushering the last of the stragglers onto the bus. Then she followed them, waved and drove away.
Gabe scrutinized his face. “Something wrong, boss?”
“Boss?” Mac shook his head. “Hardly. And no, but why do you ask?”
“Your brain’s been somewhere else all afternoon.” Gabe shrugged. “I’ve got a hunch it has something to do with your phone. Go do what you need to. I’ll make sure the horses are okay.”
“Thanks, Gabe.” Mac grinned at him. “The ice fishing was a hit, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah.” Gabe grimaced. “If you don’t count having to clean them.”
“You lost the coin toss, remember? I’ll see you in a while.” Mac gave a half wave then hurried toward the house. The afternoon edition of the newspaper with his ad in it had been delivered. He could hardly wait to check his email and see if there was an answer today.
With a cup of hot coffee in hand, he sat down in front of the computer and logged in.
Nothing.
He checked multiple times all through the evening, skipping dinner at The Haven, desperate to do something, anything, to help Adele find Gina. Finally, after one last check before retiring, he had two replies. One was useless, but the other suggested he contact a youth center in Edmonton where the person thought they’d heard the name.
It was late. No one answered the phone, of course.
Mac spent t
he night stewing, wondering, tossing as he prayed over and over for God to help him solve Adele’s dilemma. Maybe if he found Gina, Delly would be so overjoyed to meet her sister she’d overlook his lack? Doubtful, but he would track this lead as far as it would go.
Mac was up early and completed his chores long before early-riser Gabe even appeared. He ignored the foreman’s surprise and ate his breakfast while waiting for the clock to tick past nine. Finally Mac pulled out his cell phone and dialed. Then he held his breath.
“Edmonton Youth Center,” a woman’s voice answered.
“Hi. I am trying to locate a woman called Gina Parker. Her family would very much like to reunite with her.” Mac inhaled. “I was told that she might be at your center. Is that correct?”
“Parker. The name’s not familiar but I’m sorry, I’m not at liberty to give more information over the phone.”
“But I need to know for sure. May I speak to whomever can tell me? It’s very important.” Please, God, please help Adele.
“One moment.” He heard a shuffling noise, then the voice asked, “Can you take this call?”
A moment later a man’s voice, a voice Mac knew all too well said, “This is Dave. How may I help you?”
Mac froze.
“Hello? Are you there?” The husky voice softened. “Tell me what you need. Maybe I can help.”
Slowly, carefully, Mac hung up. He set the phone on the table and stared at it.
Why was Dave at a youth center?
You got dreams, Mac? I do. Someday I’m gonna finish my degree and work with kids. I always wanted that, but university is so expensive.
Dave. His former copilot. If Mac spoke to Dave, his buddy would recognize his voice.
Mac had never apologized for causing the accident, never wished his buddy a speedy recovery, never asked if there was anything he could do to help. Mac had run away from that responsibility just as he’d spent most of his life running away from life’s hard parts.
He could hardly call and ask Dave about Gina. Not that it was likely she was there, according to the receptionist. But then why did he get that lead? And what were his choices now? Take Adele to this center, face Dave, be castigated and shamed in front of her? No!
