by Krista Lakes
But he also wanted his life in New York. He wanted to be respected in Manhattan for his business acumen, he wanted to be able to sit at the same table as his major competitors and broker large deals side-by-side, he wanted Kerstman Enterprises to run almost like a machine, succeeding with or without him at the helm, maybe even have it become something that he could pass down to the next generation of Kerstmans.
And Nicholas, now more than ever, realized that he could not have both.
Of course, a part of him had always know that. He’d always known that he’d have to go back home to New York, back to a place without Molly. He’d always known that their days were numbered since the very first moment that they’d met.
And worst of all, despite all of his experience with fixing businesses and fixing other people’s lives, Nicholas didn’t know how to fix this.
A rare sense of helplessness washed over him, even as his phone vibrated with an incoming series of text messages:
Mom: Good morning, Nicky! Your dad and I decided against coming with you to meet the investors today. We think it’ll be best for all of us if we just let you do your thing. Good luck, son!
Mom: And did you already eat breakfast? I made you a plate of bacon and eggs, if you have the time. I didn’t want to say anything at dinner last night, but you’re looking a little thin.
Mom: Oh, and if you’re with Molly, tell her I made an extra takeaway plate for her too, if she wanted to swing by to pick up another one.
Mom: Sorry, meant to say *since not *if
Nicholas chuckled at his mother’s rapid-fire delivery of texts, surprised that she’d gotten so good at sending them out at such a high speed. But his chuckle turned into a groan, as he reread her last message.
She’d meant to say since, not if.
Since he was with Molly, not if he was with Molly.
He wondered if his mother had seen him carrying Molly through town. The Kerstman home wasn’t something Nicholas passed on the way to Molly’s apartment complex, but it was a small town. He wouldn't be surprised if three people on the street had called her as soon as they saw him.
He then wondered if his mother had been using one of her old professor tactics by suggesting he was in a relationship with Molly and trying to get him to respond with the truth of the situation. It was a strategy his mother had so often employed with students she’d suspected of plagiarism or being shady behind-the-scenes. Nicholas had picked up on all of his mom’s tricks while growing up, becoming used to her inventive ways of fishing for information about his personal life.
Nicholas didn’t dwell on his mother’s tactics for too long. He had too many other things to worry about at the moment. He needed to head back to his cabin and change before he met with the investors, unless he wanted to look like he was a baker gone mad.
When he’d lifted himself from the couch, he heard a small sound coming from somewhere behind him.
It sounded like someone's hum of pleasure.
“Nicholas?” It was Molly’s voice, but still drenched in sleep.
Nicholas gave her a warm smile as he turned back towards the couch. “Ms. Molly, you’re awake.”
“Did you... did you carry me home?” she asked, her eyelids fluttering in an attempt to see him.
“Yes,” he told her, smoothing out her hair again.
“Thank you.” Molly paused. “Do you really have to go?”
“What?”
“Do you really have to go...” Molly’s words slurred near the end as she drifted back off into sleep.
Nicholas’ heart ached behind his chest.
He knew that Molly had been barely conscious, but her question tapped into something at his core.
And he knew that if he could, if it was even possible, he’d stay right here with Molly until she woke up, even if it was three days from now.
Nicholas bent his head down to Molly’s, giving her a tender kiss on her cheek. It was all he could do right now, unable to express his feelings to her in her sleeping state.
He then moved towards her apartment’s front door, leaving Molly behind.
Chapter 26
Molly
Molly woke up in the afternoon, confused about how she’d gotten into her bed.
She grew even more confused when she realized that she wasn’t in her bed at all, but instead on her couch. In fact, she’d been tucked into her couch cushions.
Oh.
Right.
She shook the sleep off like a blanket as she stood away from the couch.
The memories came flooding back to her as she walked into her apartment’s kitchen.
Memories of Nicholas Kerstman offering to carry her through the streets, as if he were a superhero ripped straight from the comic-books.
She smiled at the thought of Nicholas with an over-sized letter “N” written across the chest of some hokey costume while she began to pour herself a glass of water from her fridge.
Her eyes then went towards the clock in her kitchen, watching the green numbers change: 12:35 to 12:36 PM
Panic flickered through her until she remembered she still had time. She hadn't slept through everything.
She still had time before she was supposed to meet Liam for their plans. She would meet Nicholas this evening and present her reasons to keep the store. She had time. She hadn't missed anything other than Nicholas carrying her home.
Still, she still felt frustrated at sleeping away so much of the day. There was still so much she wanted to get done before Christmas day. She went to her her closet and settled on a lime green dress with brightly colored ornaments painted all over the fabric. She called it her Christmas Tree Dress.
It was one of her favorite outfits to wear on Christmas Eve, as it was so over-the-top-festive that no one could deny the joyous holiday that was right around the corner. That, and it made her curves look really good. The dress had an amazing cut.
After a quick hop into the shower to remove the cake batter from her hair, a fast ironing of her dress, and taking at least thirty minutes to style her hair with mistletoe just in case she ran across Nicholas, Molly was ready to face the day.
Or rather, to face the afternoon.
She headed out her apartment door and then down the street, quickly making her way to the center of the town square. She soon spotted Liam waiting for her arrival.
“Ms. Carmichael!” Liam called, running to greet Molly with a firm hug. “I thought you weren’t coming this year.”
“You thought I wasn’t coming?” Molly checked her watch. “Liam, I’m not even a little late!”
“Yeah, but you usually come a lot earlier.” Liam informed her, pulling away from Molly. “What happened? Did you get lost or something?”
“Sort of...” Molly thought back on her late-night-trial-and-error-baking in Hannah’s kitchen. “Are you ready to do our annual house hunting?”
“Yeah!” Liam responded, taking his usual place beside Molly. “I brought a paper and pen and everything!”
“Good,” Molly said with a nod. “Hopefully, we won’t lose track of our points like we did last year.”
“We didn’t lose track of our points,” Liam replied with a giggle. “You just didn’t want to lose! I saw you throw the notebook away in the trash!”
“I have nooooo idea what you’re talking about, Liam,” Molly said with as much innocence in her voice as she could muster. “The notebook totally fell out of my hands. The trashcan just happened to catch it.”
“Uh-huh.” Liam snorted with a laugh and adjusted his winter hat. “This time, I’m keeping track of the points.”
“Fine.” Molly feigned a scoff as they continued to walk away from the downtown and towards the houses nearby. It was time to start their holiday game of looking at houses and earning points for the decorations.
Last year, Molly had created the House Hunting tradition with all the rules in just a few minutes. She’d gotten a desperate call from Liam’s parents asking if she’d be available to look
after him on Christmas Eve, at least until dinnertime. Liam’s parents were freelance accountants whose services always seemed to be in high demand around this time of year. Molly figured that it was because people wanted to balance their Christmas budget, not wanting to overspend too much on the holiday.
Liam’s parents being busy meant that they needed total silence in their household around the Christmas season, which worked out just fine when Liam spent his days at the shop with Molly.
However, on Christmas Eve, the shop was closed, which meant that Liam would’ve been stuck at home for an entire day with two, overworked parents cooped up inside with him.
Neither Liam or his parents were too fond of that scenario, and thus the House Hunting game was born. It was a way for Molly to hang out with Liam outside of the shop, and today she was grateful for the opportunity to be outside. She felt like she hadn’t spent as much time with Liam this Christmas season, with all of her attention going towards Nicholas.
She mentally kicked herself for even thinking about Nicholas right now. She needed to focus on Liam.
“Ms. Carmichael, can I ask you a question?” Liam asked softly. He dug a toe into a mound of snow and looked up at her. “Or is it private stuff?”
“I won’t know if it’s private stuff until you ask me the question,” Molly replied with a grin. “You can ask me anything, Liam. You know that.”
“Are you and Mr. Nicholas getting married?”
“What?” Liam’s question made Molly come to a complete stop in the middle of the sidewalk. “Liam, where’d you get that idea from?”
Liam shrugged, as he looked up at Molly. “The way you look at each other.”
“The way we look at each other?” she asked, not understanding.
Liam nodded. “Sometimes, you look at him the way my mom looks at my dad. And sometimes, he looks at you the way my dad looks at my mom. The same way he looks at her when he says it’s their anniversary.”
“Oh. Well, that’s... interesting,” Molly said, trying not to wonder what else Liam had noticed. “But no. Nicholas and I aren’t getting married, Liam. Sometimes, people just look at each other?” Molly was unsure of her own response, but she nodded along with her words like she knew what she was talking about.
“Yeah, right,” Liam said, rolling his eyes at her horrible response. “Sure. Sometimes people just look at each other. Grown-ups are so weird.”
“Hey, I heard that!” Molly said, giving him a small bump with her hip. “I’m serious, Liam, sometimes people just look at each other and it doesn’t always mean—”
“Thirty points!” Liam exclaimed as he took out his pen and paper, scribbling words and numbers down. “House with a red door. No Christmas lights. Wreaths only.”
Apparently, Liam had decided he was done talking about grown up things and wanted to play their game.
“Wreaths only?” Molly peered up at the house, a frown taking over her expression. “I hope that little brown house down the street is still worth sixty points, or else I’m definitely losing the game this year.”
“Yeah, the same way you lost last year,” Liam told her, handing the pen and paper to Molly. “Your turn. You gotta’ call out the first house you see, no cheating! And then we’ll add up all the points at the end.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don’t need to remind me of the rules. I’m the one who taught you how to play the game, remember?” Molly said, placing the pen behind her ear as she squinted towards the upcoming row of houses.
“Ooh! Red bow tied on the mailbox! Christmas lights! Wreaths in the window!” Molly shouted, pointing toward a house. “If there was a Santa Claus in their front yard that house would be worth 100 points!”
Molly then wrote down the house’s description and her subsequent amount of points. She heard Liam kicking at the snow, signaling his impatience.
“Come on, come on! My turn, my turn!” Liam took the pen and paper from Molly as soon as she’d finished writing down the final number.
“Hey, Liam, look over there!” Molly directed a finger towards a house with only a few scarce decorations, the result of it not being occupied in years. The previous tenants had moved to a different city several summers ago. The nearby neighbors would sometimes add a wreath or two onto the home’s door, just to keep it decorated in the same style as the rest of their homes for the holiday season.
Liam’s attention followed the sound of Molly’s voice and he soon had a devastated look on his face. “Hey! No fair! That house is only worth 10 points!”
“All’s fair in House Hunting, buddy,” Molly reminded him, ruffling Liam’s hat on top of his head. “Gotta’ keep your head in the game, kid.”
Liam muttered and mumbled, but he wrote the house down on the score sheet.
And Molly looked back at the empty house.
It was painted all-white with elegant pillars holding up its main frame. There were at least three stories since Molly could see a snow-frosted window that looked out from the attic. She could also see into the home’s large backyard, and she could easily imagine there being an in-ground swimming pool installed on its grass, perfect for the summertime.
Molly had always liked this home due to the neighborhood and how close it was to Christmas Wishes. Even though Molly would still have to drive to reach her main job at the elementary school, she envisioned those perfect winter mornings during the Christmas season where she could roll out of bed and walk over to the shop, even having enough time to stop for a morning hot chocolate at Sweetness & Light.
Molly turned away from the house, feeling like her heart was breaking right down the middle.
She couldn’t pinpoint why her heart felt so shattered, but she had a feeling it had something to do with how she’d been imagining her future in that house. She'd been imagining a future with Hannah. With Nicholas at Christmas Wishes.
Except she knew that wasn't what was in the cards. The house was a dream.
Nicholas, with his amazing kisses that lit her body on fire, was a dream.
Even if she convinced him to keep the store, his life wasn't here. He wouldn't stay. She shouldn't get her hopes up.
“Your turn, Ms. Carmichael,” Liam reminded her as he offered her the pen and paper. “Go! Go! Go!”
Molly shook her head in a vain attempt to shake off her lonely thoughts. She then took the pen and paper out of Liam’s waiting hands. Now wasn't the time to be sad. Now was the time to crush a seven year old boy's dreams of winning a game.
“House with a red door. Wreath and blow-up decortations. Thirty points.”
Chapter 27
Molly
“Liam! My favorite seven year old in the world,” Mr. Carmichael exclaimed, embracing Liam as soon as he stepped through the front door of the Carmichael home.
“What about me?” Molly asked, feigning hurt.
“And Molly! My favorite twenty-five year old in the world,” Molly’s dad exclaimed, using the same intonation. He pulled her into the shared hug with Liam.
“You don’t always have to announce our ages, Dad,” Molly said with a laugh as she shimmed her way out of her father’s bear hug.
“Yes, I do. It’s how I keep track of my favorite people. What? You think you’re the only Molly I know? I know thousands.”
She rolled her eyes at her father, but secretly enjoyed it just the same.
“So, no work today?” Mr. Carmichael asked.
“Christmas Wishes is closed for the day,” Molly replied. “As per tradition.”
“You do like your traditions,” her father agreed. “How was your new tradition of managing the store without the bosses around? Did you like being by yourself?”
“She wasn’t by herself! She had me!” Liam pointed out, looking hurt at being forgotten.
Mr. Carmichael gave him a grin. “That’s right! How could I forget the world’s best helper? You know what helpers get, don’t you?”
“Presents?” Liam suggested.
“Something better than pres
ents.” Mr. Carmichael kept his voice at a whisper while he guided Liam back towards the family’s kitchen. “Come with me, kid, but you have to stay quiet. Emma just finished making a fresh batch of gingerbread cookies, and no one’s supposed to have any until dinnertime, but you and I are going to have some for lunch.”
“Yes!” Liam shouted. He looked around and in a much quieter voice, said it again. “Yes!”
Molly chuckled at her father’s shenanigans. Her mother had never truly kept any baked goods off limits, but Mr. Carmichael made it seem like he and Liam were getting away with something. Molly recalled when he’d do the same with her on Christmas Eve. Her father would say that although Santa’s milk and cookies were only for Santa, he was “willing to get in trouble” for Molly’s sake and sneak her a few cookies in the middle of the night.
As her sweet childhood memories had finished replaying in her head, Molly took a few seconds to glance around her parents' home, noting the festive decorations. There were lights and a tree. Her mother had added some new poinsettias and greenery.
A bright smile came to Molly’s face when she saw her favorite Christmas fixture in the Carmichael household. It was a large plastic candy cane that reached from the floor all the way to the ceiling. This year, the Carmichaels chose to rest the candy cane against the living room wall right beside their glowing Christmas tree.
The candy cane had been in their family for as long as Molly could remember, even being displayed in their home in New York. Although, since their home there was much smaller, the candy cane was always laid on its side. Molly remembered being so happy the first time she got to see the candy cane in its proper upright position.
“Is your dad off with Liam?” Mrs. Carmichael asked, appearing beside Molly and resting a hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “They’re already eating my cookies, aren’t they?”
