by Krista Lakes
“Yes! Exactly!” Molly sat up on the couch with a start. “Hannah, it was the strangest thing. One minute, I felt like I knew him, and then it’s like a switch flipped, and all he could care about was his business.”
“Maybe his business is his first love,” Hannah suggested. “Maybe, no matter how much he cared about you, how much he cares about anyone, his business will always come first. Some people are just like that, you know. They don’t really get sentimental.”
“But he said I had his heart,” Molly whispered. She could then feel the tears building up behind her eyes again, but she managed to keep the flood at bay. “It's all so stupid.”
“Well, if he's dumb enough to do this, he doesn't deserve you,” Hannah told her. “Good riddance.”
Molly's face crumpled. “Hannah, what if I’m the one making a mistake? What if I’m supposed to go with him? Mom told me that sometimes, when you love someone, something big has to change. What if I’m supposed to be the one who changes?”
“Molly Carmichael, listen to me carefully,” Hannah said forcefully. “It’s one thing to change a bad habit, but it’s an entirely different thing to change your heart. You’re not built the same as Nicholas Kerstman. You would never choose money over following your dreams or doing what makes you happy. You would never choose a sack full of cash over the person you love, either.”
“But what if he's the one?” Molly asked, tears filling her eyes again.
Hannah sighed. “I don’t know, Molly. I just don’t think you’re the one who’s supposed to change here. You’re a good person, all the way through.”
Molly smiled over at Hannah. “You’re just saying that because you don’t want me to move to New York. You don’t want me bothering you when you’re all rich and famous.”
“Hey! I’ve put up with you for twelve long years. Haven’t I suffered enough?” Hannah asked, crossing her arms and wearing a withering look.
Molly finally let herself laugh. She knew Hannah was trying to cheer her up.
“You know, I really don’t think New York is so bad. I mean, it was the first place I grew up. But I just don’t know, Hannah,” Molly said with a sigh. “I like it here. I like living here. I like being close to my parents. I like my job. I'm a part of the town.”
“You don’t have to explain to anyone why you want to stay anywhere, Molly,” Hannah told her. She smiled over at Molly. “You can just stay. No questions asked. As long as you’re sure staying is what’ll make you happy.”
“I’m sure. I think,” Molly said, her face furrowed as she tried to decide. “Maybe?”
“Maybe?” Hannah asked, raising an eyebrow.
“No, no. I’m sure, I’m sure. I can almost imagine myself in New York, but it never feels right.” She shook her head and sighed. “I just wish being so sure it's not the right place didn’t make me feel so awful.”
Hannah hugged her friend. Molly leaned against her, wishing that she knew what she was supposed to do. She just wanted to be happy.
“Hey. That hot chocolate offer is still on the table,” Hannah said after a while. “Are you sure sugar won’t make you feel even a little bit better?”
“You know what? Let’s give it a try,” Molly said, running a hand through her hair. “There’s nothing wrong with giving tons of sugar a shot.”
“Nothing wrong at all,” Hannah agreed. She grinned back at Molly before she moved away from the couch. “Just give me five minutes in the kitchen. And in the meantime, put on one of those Christmas movies you like. Maybe the Muppet one?”
“But you don’t like that one,” Molly replied. “You like the one with the Star Trek guy better.”
“But you love that one, so that’s the one we’re going to watch,” Hannah told her. She squeezed Molly's shoulder as she headed off to Molly’s kitchen. “Put it on, put it on!”
Once Hannah was out of the living room, Molly let her brave face fall and sadness come back. Her shoulders slumped and she wanted to crawl into a miserable ball and sob some more. This was a sadness that went far deeper than sugar could ever hope to touch.
Not only was she losing the store and Nicholas Kerstman, but she had a feeling, deep in her stomach, that this would be the last Christmas Eve she spent with Hannah like this.
Even though Molly knew that staying here would make her happy, even though she couldn’t imagine a life in New York, so far away from the sights and sounds that made her heart feel safe, it still pained her to think about future Christmases spent without either one of them by her side.
By the time Hannah had come back into the living room, holding a hot chocolate in each of her hands, Molly managed to plaster on a bright fake smile as her best friend settled into the couch beside her.
“You okay?” Hannah handed Molly her respective drink before taking a sip of her own.
“No,” Molly answered honestly, reaching for the TV remote. “But, I will be. Eventually.”
“Good, eventually works,” Hannah agreed softly. “Now, get that movie on.”
Molly flipped through the Christmas movies, determined to enjoy her last night of normalcy.
* * *
Molly woke up bright and early to her alarm.
She’d set it to wake her up just in time for her family’s traditional Christmas breakfast. She groaned and turned it off, wishing that she could have another hour of sleep. Or maybe just another hour of not thinking about Nicholas.
Hannah was gone, of course, having headed out at around midnight last night. Molly knew that Hannah had so much preparation to do for her big BakeTown special later that day, and she was so grateful that Hannah had still chosen to spend her Christmas Eve by Molly’s side.
Molly got ready to leave for her parents’ house, pulling on a pair of knee-high black boots and a dress that looked like it’d been patterned after the brightest of Christmas wrapping paper. She hoped that maybe the festive dress would make her feel a little more festive herself.
Today, however, she’d decided against the mistletoe in her hair. She couldn’t handle her father making a passing joke about her “trying to get Nicholas Kerstman to kiss her under the mistletoe” because Molly knew that she couldn’t handle thinking about Nicholas Kerstman today. She especially didn't want to think of kissing him.
That made her heart ache and her body miss him.
Instead of worrying about her previous romantic entanglement, Molly resolved to get lost in the spirit of Christmas. She was going to use all of her mental energy on the holiday, maybe stopping by to visit Liam after she’d had breakfast with her parents. Of course, she’d reserve the majority of her energy for Hannah’s big event, wanting to be the person cheering the loudest for her friend when she introduced Sweetness & Light to the entire TV watching world.
Before she left her apartment for the day, Molly noticed Nicholas’ wristwatch glowing on the living room table, glistening with the reflected light coming from her windows.
She hesitated for a moment and she looked down at her empty wrist. She swallowed hard.
It was such a strange feeling, still wanting to somehow keep him close to her even though she knew that she’d never see him again. Why would she? Nicholas Kerstman had no reason to step into this town again., He was attached to New York now. Molly knew that it would take something special to bring him back into her world.
And she couldn’t think of anything special off the top of her head.
Still, she grabbed for the watch, slipping it onto her wrist.
She hated how her heart felt so much lighter with merely the idea of Nicholas Kerstman seeming to calm the storm behind her chest. It was so incredibly stupid.
She decided that if anyone asked about the watch, she’d insist that it was a gift from a Secret Santa, as she was unwilling to let Nicholas’ name even cross her lips.
Molly then headed out her front door and made her way to her parents’ home.
Chapter 31
Molly
“Molly!” Mrs. Carmichael
greeted her with kisses as as she pulled her daughter inside her home. “Merry Christmas, my sweetheart!”
“Ah, lay off the girl, Emma! She just stepped through the door,” Mr. Carmichael told her. He was holding a cup of coffee in his hands and he smiled over at his daughter. “Merry Christmas, Molly. Where are our presents?”
“Dad, you know I put your stuff under the tree weeks ago,” Molly replied with a grin. She walked over to her father, pulling him in for a hug as well. “You’re always trying to trick me into getting you guys more presents.”
“And one of these days, you’re going to fall for it. Hook, line and sinker,” he said with a laugh. “I hope you still like sausage, hash-browns and Christmas waffles. Your mother emptied out an entire can of whipped cream over the stack of waffles this year.”
“Sounds perfect,” Molly said. She turned to smile back at her mother who was still standing near the door. “Thanks, mom.”
“Anything for you, my Molly.” Mrs. Carmichael closed the front door and headed off to the kitchen. “Go sit with your father in the living room while I check if the hash-browns are cooked all the way through.”
Molly liked the feeling of tradition. Already, she could feel her heart mending. Tradition kept her grounded. It brought her joy, and today, that's exactly what she needed.
She headed to the living room, ready to continue with opening presents and then gorging on food. Her father stopped her, grabbing at her wrist.
“Whoa.” Mr. Carmichael whistled. He then bent to get a closer look at the watch on Molly’s wrist. She tried not to squirm away. “Where’d you get this? I’ve only seen these kind of watches locked up behind display cases.”
“It was Secret Santa... I...” Molly fumbled as she tried to force the lie to come out of her mouth. But she sighed with a heavy heart, when she realized that she could never lie to her father, not even if she wanted to. “It’s from Nicholas. He gave it to me before he left.”
“Is this what the kids are doing now? Instead of giving you his picture in a locket he gives you a watch that costs more than this house?” Mr. Carmichael teased, as he let go of Molly’s hand. “And when did you two get so close, anyway? Or is he just a really generous kind of guy?”
“We, um, worked together. A lot,” she said noncommittally. “Pretty much every day when he was here.”
“I see.” Mr. Carmichael took a step closer to his daughter. “So, you hung out. And he gave you his watch. Did you kiss him?”
“Dad!”
“I’m allowed to ask questions!” Mr. Carmichael threw up his arms in a huff. “Although, all that really matters is if he kissed you first.”
“Yes. He kissed me. I kissed him. Do you want more sordid details or can we please skip the rest of this conversation?” Molly was having painful flashbacks to the awkwardness of her middle school years when her dad would ask her if she liked any boys in her classes.
“Do you like him?” he asked her.
Molly gave her father a hurried nod, trying to speed through the conversation as fast as possible. She knew he wouldn't stop until he had the answers he wanted. It was better just to get it all out now.
Her father responded with a grin. “That’s good. It’s good that you like him, because he’s obviously in love with you.”
“No, he's not,” Molly assured him. He wouldn't have kept the sale a secret if he was, she thought to herself.
“Nicholas Kerstman is obviously in love with you. Do I really need to expand on that?” Mr. Carmichael gave the watch on Molly’s wrist another glance. “I only met the boy for what felt like ten minutes, but whenever he was talking to anybody else, whether it was me, your mother, or his own parents, he would look at that watch every five seconds.”
“So?” Molly shrugged. “He's a busy guy.”
Mr. Carmichael’s smile then grew even wider. “Except when he spoke to you, Molly. I never saw him check the time when he was talking with you. Like suddenly, it didn’t matter what time it was or how much of his time you happened to eat up, as long as he got to listen to what you had to say.”
“Dad...” Molly sighed, wishing she had the guts to tell him that Nicholas had broken her heart when he gave her the watch. That this wasn't the happy story he seemed to think it was. “He never said he loved me.”
“He didn’t have to say the L word. You’re wearing it on your wrist, aren’t you?” Mr. Carmichael said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Now, let’s go sit down, yeah? I’d like to check out one of those Christmas parades on TV since your mom and I missed the local one.”
Mr. Carmichael patted Molly's shoulder before he found his seat in the living room.
Molly followed right behind her father, her fingers playing with the watch on her wrist.
* * *
Christmas breakfast in the Carmichael household had been business as usual, with Molly feeling too stuffed from the endless amount of sausage and hash-browns to even get through one complete waffle. Her father had offered to finish off her Christmas waffles for her, and Molly had handed him her plate.
Tradition felt good.
Opening presents around the tree had also been a normal affair. Her mother made sure that Christmas classics were playing through the home’s Bluetooth speakers. As they continued with their gift exchange, there was also the distinct scent of cinnamon in the air, with Ms. Carmichael lighting scented candles and placing them all around the living room.
Mr. Carmichael was the first to open his present from Molly, shaking the box for emphasis, even though Molly knew that her dad already knew what was inside. He still did his best impression of surprise when he’d found the official donation form in the box letting him know that Molly had renewed her recurrent donation to her father’s favorite charity. He’d always been so uncomfortable with proper gifts and Molly had discovered years ago that her father’s enjoyment of the holiday came from giving to others, even if that meant he didn’t receive anything, himself.
Mrs. Carmichael was next to open her present from Molly, and she smiled with delight once she’d gotten off all of the wrapping. Molly had purchased her mother a gardening set to use during the spring, and Mrs. Carmichael looked as if she couldn’t have been more pleased. In recent months, her mother had been talking about how much she missed the garden of her youth when Molly’s grandmother would use her expert green thumb to turn the backyard into a flower-filled wonderland. Molly hoped that her own mother would be able to capture the same kind of magic, and Molly looked forward to seeing the Carmichaels’ yard in full bloom someday.
Molly was the last one to open her own presents.
Her mother and father had both gone in on a gift for her. Molly pulled the rather heavy package onto the couch beside her as she started in on ripping away the wrapping paper. Once she’d revealed the present packed within, she couldn’t help the way her lips curved into a joyous smile.
Her parents had gotten her a set of children’s books, the exact kind that Molly would encourage the kids in her class to read in their free time. While the elementary school did have a library, her second graders struggled when it came to borrowing books and returning them. Molly liked to have her own library for the children to use whenever they wanted and these were a perfect addition.
She thanked her parents for such a thoughtful gift, moving to embrace them both at the exact same time. Her father made a pretend fuss about her holding onto them a bit too hard, and her mother hugged her back even tighter.
By the afternoon, they’d finished with their Christmas rituals and Molly soon checked Nicholas' watch for the time, even though the action of doing so made her heart ache in her chest.
It was nearly time for Hannah’s big shot at televised BakeTown glory. Molly gave her parents a quick kiss on the cheek before waving them both goodbye.
And once again, she was heading back out into the snowy town streets.
Chapter 32
Nicholas
Nicholas looked over his lu
ggage piled up in the rented cabin’s living room with an ache in his chest he didn't recognize. Usually, he was excited to leave this town and head back to New York. Usually, he couldn't wait to get out of here.
His eyes scanned the cabin yet again, wanting to make sure that he’d packed everything that he’d brought with him. Despite his best efforts, he felt like he was forgetting something important. He knew he had everything from the cabin packed though. The thing he was forgetting wasn't his anymore.
When he felt satisfied that he really had packed up all his belongings, he plopped down on the living room couch, letting his face fall into his hands.
He was so tired.
He’d found it difficult to get any sleep at all last night, and he tossed and turned and worried and worried and worried about Molly Carmichael.
He wanted to fix it. He wanted to find a way to make-up for the hurt he’d caused her back at the bakery. He wanted her to somehow be okay with Manhattan, maybe even taking a job as a secretary at Kerstman Enterprises until she could find a job teaching in the city. He wanted her by his side for all of his future functions and soirees. Nicholas imagined that Molly would be the only person smiling her megawatt smile, even in a room full of the dullest people on earth.
But he knew how unfair that would be to Molly.
Molly had told him that she loved living here, and he knew she was an important part of the community. It just wasn’t fair for Nicholas to expect her to be able to change like that just for him.
Nicholas’ phone beeped and blared in his jacket pocket, shaking him out of his thoughts. He saw that it was a notification from his business account.
The money from the deal had been deposited.
While sitting on his living room couch, Nicholas had become a million dollars richer.
Typically, closing this kind of business deal would cause him to be elated. He’d maybe pump his fists in the air a few times to celebrate before offering to take everyone in his office out for a lobster and white wine dinner, all expenses paid.
