“How’s Deidra?” Jacoby asks to shift attention to me.
I cut my eyes at him. I know damn well he didn’t ask out of concern. He dislikes being out of the loop. Tasha is the friend with seniority, and he hates when she keeps better tabs on me.
I sip apple juice and try to think of something that’s bothering me. Really, I can only complain about sex deprivation. Deidra has been out-of-town for three days. She filled my tank before departing for Virginia. My fuel, however, has rapidly depleted and I’m persisting on a fourth tank of erotic memories. I tried to fill-up when Deidra called last night. I missed her and wanted more than her voice. I suggested we video chat.
So she hangs up the phone and calls me back on my tablet. I prop up the tablet on the nightstand as she teases me with her bulging cleavage. She recaps a part of her long day before the conversation turns naughty.
“Take off your pants,” she commands. “Panties too.” I slide my bottoms from my waist, happy to let air grace the tingling between my thighs. “Your turn.”
“Shirt,” I request.
Without hesitation, she draws her camisole over her head. She removes the clip from her bound hair and tosses her head left-to-right, hair concealing the bra straps across her shoulders. She never lets her hair down during foreplay. This new element of playfulness sends me over the edge. I move to the center of the bed to ensure my knees are within the video frame, spreading my legs so she can see my eagerness.
She’s happy to watch me self-pleasure and I want to see her do the same. So she rests on her back, slowly moving her phone downward, the camera panning along the brown skin I love to tickle, resting on the pussy I’m missing and can’t taste.
Her fingers start to dance on her clit and mine do too. But the more we tango, the less I view. “Baby,” I say to stop us. She raises the phone to her face. “Get the phone out your hand.”
She follows my order and searches for something to brace the phone while I stare at the ceiling of her room.
“I’ll use my purse.” She steadies the phone and asks whether the angle is acceptable.
Finally, I have a full view of her hips. “Perfect,” I say. So she opens her legs and delights herself again. I firmly massage between my lips and begin to reach the point where I want to throw my head back and moan with my mouth open until her camera goes black.
“Baby,” I say to garner her attention.
“Shit!”
She picks up the phone and attempts to prop it in a steadier position, but I tell her to forget it. The interruption douses my flame. We remain clothes free and video chat until we almost fall asleep.
The thought of how good Deidra looked with her hair down and legs wide open is arousing. I try to take my mind off that by eating a bit of food. Then I answer Jacoby. “She’s good. Just working and getting ready for her daughter’s graduation party.”
“Oh, when’s the graduation?” Tasha asks.
“Tomorrow.”
“When did she get a job?” Jacoby inquires.
“Last year!” Tasha answers.
“She’s stripping?” he asks.
I tilt my head.
“That’s a legitimate question.”
I exhale and stare at him until he apologizes.
“Okay. Who is she staying with up there?”
I place my fork aside. I shouldn’t hold a fork while he’s pressing my buttons. Deidra is staying with a friend, a detail only I need to know. “I could have sworn it was my damn turn to vent.”
“You didn’t say anything.”
I turn toward Tasha to officially vent. “What do you do when your best friend only talks shit about your woman?”
“Pick up your fork,” she says.
I do as instructed.
“That shit ain’t funny,” Jacoby complains.
“You’re not funny!” I stab the fork in my hash browns instead of his hand. Then I take another bite to focus on something other than him and my frustration.
“Anyway,” he says. “What’s next for the kid? School? Job? Travel the world?”
“Memphis,” Tasha informs him.
“For real?”
This is another small thing Jacoby should’ve known already. A few weeks ago, Deidra persuaded Shannon to attend UofM. Actually, ‘persuade’ is an understatement. Deidra bribed Shannon. Deidra mailed her daughter a box full of school paraphernalia and promised her a gently used car if she comes to Memphis. She even pulled me to the phone so I could brag to Shannon about how much I enjoyed attending UofM.
“She’s gonna stay with you, too?” Jacoby asks.
I ignore his snide undertone. Though Shannon is welcome in our home, Deidra wants her to partake in the complete collegiate experience. “No, she won’t be a commuter anytime soon.”
Jacoby stops prying, but I’m still annoyed by his attitude. I’m happy with my life and the new additions. Why isn’t he happy for me?
I’m putting mistakes and distrust behind me. I’ve moved on, and he’s overdue for moving on, too.
34
DEIDRA AND I have full schedules for Memorial Day weekend. We don’t have a lot of time to prepare for her daughter’s visit or complete neglected chores. I’ve been occupied with volunteering for the hospital’s telethon, and Deidra is constantly traveling throughout the tri-state area for promotional events, working ten to fourteen hour days. She clears just enough space in her Thursday afternoon to get Shannon from the airport to the house. After that, she’s off to her next site. Now, I’m rushing home from work to clean up. I promised Deidra I’d have the guestroom ready, except I’m too late.
“Hey,” Shannon says, staring at her phone. “My mom said she’ll be back around seven.”
“How was the flight?”
Her index finger repetitively swipes the screen of her phone. “Too long and too crowded.”
I pull off my shoes. “You ready for tomorrow?”
Her finger freezes. She sits up on the couch and smiles. “Oh yeah! I already set my alarm and picked out my clothes.”
Shannon flew down for UofM’s annual Freshmen Friday, a day of touring and indoctrination for incoming students— a significant event for Shannon because it’s her first campus visit.
“What do you look forward to the most?” I ask and sit on the loveseat.
“Seeing the dorms. You lived on campus, right?”
“Freshmen and sophomore year. By junior year I was bound to kill a roommate, so I moved off campus with my friend Tasha.”
“Can you talk my mom into letting me live off campus next semester?”
“Ha! I doubt it.”
She smiles at her effort.
“Well,” I say, pausing to yawn. “I need to wash the sheets in the room.”
“You don’t have to. You look tired.”
My eyes are heavy and I desperately want a nap, but the bedding hasn’t been washed since Tasha occupied the guestroom after her home flooded. I’ve lived with Tasha before; God knows what happened in those sheets when Deidra and I weren’t home.
I toss the first of two loads into the washer and clean the entire first level of the house. Shannon is sitting on the floor feverishly texting when I walk into the room with an armful of warm laundry. She giggles at an incoming text. I throw my armload into the wingback chair next to the bed. I pull the sheets from the entangled stack and she stops her fingers to help me stretch them across the mattress. Afterward, I grab the comforter from the chair. I accidentally sweep the nightstand with the bulky material, which knocks her purse to the floor.
I quickly retrieve the contents that slid out of her purse as she hurries to my side of the bed. She snatches a box out of my hand just as I realize it’s an open box of condoms. “Please don’t tell her you saw these,” she says with worried eyes.
I smile a little. She thinks I’ll tell Deidra about the open box. Hell, who am I to snitch? When I was seventeen I had sex whenever I could and sadly in too many God-awful places. At least she carries protection.
I was too naïve about my sexuality at seventeen, trying to prove to my boyfriend that I loved him while also trying to prove to myself I could be straight by having sex without condoms. And I was stupid enough to trust him with the pullout method.
I know all too well what it’s like being seventeen and sexing, luxuriating in risk and immaturity. But, I’m an adult now and feel I should at least say something to her. “You… you know how to use those?”
Her eyes remain downcast as she grabs a pillowcase. “I’ve had sex ed from school, church, my dad, and Aunt J.”
“Juanita?” I stifle a laugh.
“The last time I was here, she threw that box in my lap and said ‘don’t be like me.’ Then she said some stuff I don’t ever wanna hear again.”
“How thoughtful.”
“Right. And your girlfriend made me practice on a banana when I turned fifteen, sixteen, and seventeen. And she gave me female condoms and dental dams and made me watch a bunch of YouTube videos. So, I’m good.”
I grab the last pillowcase, wondering whether she plans to put any of that banana education to use in Memphis. Why else would she fly here with condoms in her purse? I resist asking and leave for my bedroom.
Deidra arrives by the time I’m finished with chores. I run her a bath and head downstairs so she can unwind. I rest my feet by lying on my favorite end of the couch to watch a new movie. Eventually, she comes downstairs to spend time with her daughter. Near the end of the movie, Deidra slides between the couch and me, wiggling her head until she finds a comfortable spot between my arm and shoulder. I’m glad she’s next to me, but I can’t miss the best part of this movie.
“Let’s go upstairs,” she whispers.
“Maybe later,” I say, hoping she’ll stay quiet for just a few more minutes.
We haven’t been intimate in five days because Deidra refuses to have any form of sex during or immediately after her period. Apparently, she’s ready now, though I’m hesitant to make love with Shannon in the house because her mother has a tendency to get too damn loud. Heavy breathing leads to moans that lead to profanity at the top of her lungs.
Deidra tries to convince me otherwise by moving my hand to her back and leisurely kissing my neck. The soothing tongue play forces my eyelids closed, causing me to miss a significant scene in the movie. I reach for the remote to rewind, but she grabs it from the ottoman and tosses it to the loveseat.
“This movie comes on every other day. Record it,” she says and nibbles on my lips.
She knows the teasing kisses aren’t enough to fully unleash my sexual urges. She pulls her maxi dress up and shifts her hips until sitting in my lap, pinning me between her thighs, treating me to slow, deep kisses.
“I’ll use the new toy on you,” she whispers on my lips.
I don’t budge. She can wait until after this movie.
I try to sit up but she sinks into my lap, rubbing the core of her body along mine while teasing my mouth. Then her lips graze my ear as she moans. Her moans always get me. She knows a soft, lustful moan full of yearning will lure me to intimacy. I intently listen as the sweet sound and her gliding hips cast a spell on me, leading my hands down her back to softer, rounder areas of her body. I completely change my mind about seeing the rest of the movie tonight once my hands realize that her dress is the only barrier between her flesh and mine.
I’m on the verge of directing us off the couch until I hear footsteps in the living room. Deidra releases her lock on my lips and I let go of her ass. We adjust to appropriate positions.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Deidra asks.
“Ma, we just talked about this. I told you someone was picking me up around ten.”
“Don’t start with that ‘someone’ crap, Shannon.”
“Out with Phillip. We’re friends. You know him. He used to live next door to Aunt J.”
“Next door? Girl, there’s a different family in that house every year.”
They go back and forth about the details of going out with Phillip. I hope Deidra will cut Shannon some slack, for both Shannon’s sake and mine. I’m relieved when Deidra says, “Change clothes first.”
“Why?” Shannon objects. “He’s outside waiting on me.”
“So? Only a fool would let you walk out at night dressed like that.” I silently agree that the shorts are too small and tight as Shannon storms out the room.
I take Deidra’s hand. “You ready?”
She pulls away like I’m interrupting her. I roll my eyes and rest against the couch. I’m so horny now that waiting only agitates me. Shannon marches back into the living room wearing black leggings. She stops in the center of the room for her mother’s approval.
“Tell him to come inside,” Deidra says.
“Mama, are you serious?”
“Now!”
Shannon looks at me as if I can save her at the last second. This battle is between her and her mom. When I cross my arms, she sighs and walks out the front door.
I cannot believe Deidra is being so difficult with her college-bound daughter. We were in the middle of something, now she’s stalling. If she’s this guarded with Shannon’s social life now, Lord knows how she’ll react once Shannon is a freshman.
Shannon returns with her date. He steps into the foyer, quickly speaks to us, and waits as Shannon closes the door behind them. His baggy hoodie, new J’s, and shiny watch don’t match the nervousness across his face.
Deidra approaches Phillip. “I’m Ms. Jamison. How old are you?”
“Eighteen.”
“Is that your car outside?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Do you have a license?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Let me see it.”
Shannon bites her lip as Phillip fidgets in his back pocket. The wallet slips from his fingers and she helps him pick it up. He passes his license over and hides his hands in the hoodie pocket. Poor young man, his hands are probably trembling. I wonder whether he’s met Juanita. If so, he probably thinks Deidra is as crazy her sister. I shield my mouth to keep from laughing.
Deidra gives the license back. “Happy belated birthday. Where do you live?”
“On campus.”
Shannon drops her head. Phillip is so timid I’m sure he didn’t think twice about lying about his residence. By now, Shannon may be thinking the same thing I’m thinking: Deidra’s ruining the night for all of us.
“Do you have roommates?”
“No, ma’am. I’m in a one-bedroom.”
What an idiot! I stand up and walk to the kitchen. Now that Shannon’s staying, I tune them out and pour myself a glass a wine. This merlot will be my only pleasure tonight. I take a long sip and refill the glass. Then I return the bottle to the refrigerator and step to the living room for more of the sad spectacle.
To my surprise, Mr. Goody-two-shoes is promising to have Shannon back by 1:00. He opens the door and Shannon steps outside. Deidra locks the door behind them and smiles at me.
“You ready, love?” She walks over and removes the glass from my hand. “Your mouth won’t have time for this.”
“Who said I still wanna have sex?”
She laughs. “Drop the act and come on.” She slaps my ass and pushes my hips toward the stairs.
“You know where they’re going?” I ask.
“The movies. Why?”
“Aren’t you worried about him doing to her what I’m about to do to you?”
“Baby, hush!” When we reach the top of the stairs, she covers her ears. “I don’t need to hear that right now.”
“Okay, but earlier Sha—”
Deidra pinches my lips shut. “Don’t make me gag you with my panties.”
Moments later, I hear a car pulling out the driveway as I’m lifting Deidra’s dress above her shoulders. Instead of letting my conscience interrupt us, I focus on the succulent breasts before my face.
35
MAMA AND HER SIBLINGS host a family gathering over Memorial Day
weekend every year. Too many first and second cousins and grandchildren are absent from year-to-year to call the poorly planned gathering a family reunion. After years of sparse attendance, I assumed someone would step-up and coordinate an official reunion with tee shirts, activities, and a firm itinerary. But taking the lead also means accepting the risk of expenses.
So, a fraction of the family meets at my parents’ house for a Saturday of catching up and picture taking. And with Mama in charge of the menu, there’s always enough food for seconds, thirds, and to-go plates. I purposely selected this occasion to introduce Deidra to my family. One of my closest aunts and cousins are beginning to think she’s a figment of my imagination. Today, I can bring her into the fold without being the center of attention.
With Freshmen Friday completed, Deidra concentrates on the day ahead of us. She wakes me up at a quarter till six so I can come downstairs and keep her company.
“Why are we up so early?” I complain. “We’re not leaving till noon.”
“I can’t go to your parents’ house empty handed. I need time to make a sweet potato casserole and get myself dressed.”
She makes breakfast first and places a plate in the microwave for Shannon. To stay alert, I gather the casserole ingredients and help peel the potatoes. By 8:00, I’m back in bed, happily wiggling my toes against the cool sheets as my head sinks into my beloved memory foam pillow. I intend to fall asleep and reclaim the two hours Deidra stole from me, except she won’t stop talking. She goes in the bathroom to apply hair removal cream to her legs. Once her legs are coated, she steps into the closet for something to wear.
“Do your parents know about me?” She steps out of the closet for my answer.
She wants assurance that her presence is expected, so I oblige her, again. “We’ve been together for fifteen months, Dee. Of course they know about you.”
“What do they know about me?”
“They know that you care about me and that I’m serious about you.”
The Dawn of Nia Page 16
