“Are you all right?” she asked.
He added a dash of something else to the steak. “Fine. Why?” His tone was light, but a tension that matched hers ran through it.
“You seem—I don’t know—someplace else, I guess.”
He turned long enough to squeeze her hand, before giving his attention to the meal again. “It’s all good. I promise. Will you grab an extra plate and such for the table?”
She eyed his back with curiosity. “Are we hosting an imaginary friend?”
“A real one. I invited an old buddy over for dinner tonight. I thought I said something. I hope it’s okay.”
She was certain he hadn’t told her. “No worries.” It made sense the longer they were here, the more people from his past he’d run into.
Antonio was finishing up, when someone rang the bell. He had his hands full, so Emily said, “I’ll get it.”
“Wait,” Antonio called.
Emily was already answering the door.
Justin stood in the hallway, looking better than she remembered and wearing a sheepish grin. “Surprise.”
Her heart dropped into her shoes, and her mind stalled. “I don’t think now’s a good time. We’re expecting company.” Stupid thing to say. She didn’t have the mental capacity to figure out why.
“You’re early.” Antonio’s voice carried from behind her.
Justin shrugged. “I think I’m the company.”
“Oh.” She moved aside to let him in. She was hung up on the surreal contrast of the moment. It felt right to see Justin here. As if it was always meant to be. At the same time, it was wrong. Antonio refused to say more than a few sentences to him over the last month, and that was with Justin halfway around the world.
Now he stood in their living room, Antonio greeting him as if nothing happened.
Justin held out a bunch of wildflowers and a bottle of wine. “For my charming hosts.”
Antonio moved to Emily’s side and took the drink. She grabbed the bouquet, to have something to do, and turned away. “I’ll see if we have a vase.”
Her mind kicked into overdrive when she broke eye contact with Justin, several thoughts spilling into her head at once. Both men knew this was coming. Why did Antonio keep it a secret? Did he know last week, when he told her how he felt? That didn’t make sense, but neither did any of this.
Irrational panic gripped her stomach, and suddenly dinner didn’t smell so good. Would this cost her Antonio? They’d talked about not having to choose, if Justin came back into their lives, and she believed Antonio meant what he said, but with every emotion filling her, it was difficult to remember those simple promises.
Antonio wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and pulled her close. “Are you all right?”
“I don’t think we have any vases.” It wasn’t the right answer, but she was fortunate to form words at all.
He took the flowers from her and set them on the counter. “They’ll be okay here for now. Come keep our guest company, while I bring out dinner.”
“Sure. Okay.” She let herself be led to the table and took a seat across from Justin.
“I’m not used to seeing you at a loss for words,” he said, teasing in his voice.
She gave him a weak smile.
Through the meal, both men tried to draw her into the conversation. They chatted about the fact that Justin was partnering with the company, and asked for her thoughts. They talked about what had changed since Justin was last here and asked about her favorite parts of the city so far. It only lasted an hour or so, but the meal seemed to Emily to stretch on for an eternity.
It was as if they were never angry at each other. As much as she tried to tell herself she was overreacting, she couldn’t silence the part of her asking if she was about to lose something wonderful.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Justin had expected Antonio to be antagonistic this afternoon in the office. When the meeting went better than Justin dared hope for, he dropped his defenses. Which meant he was doubly unprepared for the lukewarm reception from Emily. Her cool, single-word responses and refusal to make eye contact during dinner dug deep, jarring him more than he expected.
He followed Antonio’s lead through the meal, keeping up his half of the conversation. Dessert was served, and Justin sectioned off a forkful of tiramisu. “I missed your cooking.”
“There are leftovers. I’ll wrap some up for you,” Antonio said.
Emily pushed back from the table without touching her food. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to do a thing.”
“Em, wait.” Antonio hurried after her and stopped her halfway between the dining room table and what Justin assumed were the bedrooms. Antonio grabbed her arm. “What’s wrong?” He kept his voice quiet.
Justin couldn’t help but hear, anyway, in the small space. He tried to busy himself with his food, rather than eavesdrop.
“This is a bit out of the blue is all.” Emily’s grumble carried through the room.
Unless Justin plugged his ears, he was going to hear the conversation. “I’m not here to cause a rift. I can leave, if you’d prefer.”
“No.” Antonio glanced at him, then turned back to Emily. “We talked about—”
“I know what we talked about. I was there.” Emily’s tone was curt.
“It doesn’t matter. That’s not why he’s here,” Antonio said.
Justin should stay out of this, but his curiosity got the better of him. “Why am I here?”
“To visit. As a friend.” Antonio kept his gaze fixed on Emily. “I didn’t know he was coming until he showed up in my office today. I thought inviting him over would be a pleasant surprise. I promise I didn’t invite him as a way to trap you into making good on a hypothetical conversation.”
Intriguing.
Emily looked past Antonio to Justin, making eye contact for the first time that evening. “Pretend I’m a tad insecure about reaching a new level in this relationship, and assure me you’re not here to screw things up. That you didn’t fly halfway around the world, without warning either of us, because you hoped—I don’t know—that being face-to-face would make Antonio more likely to listen when you told him you were wrong. That you love him too.”
How the fuck did she know that?
“That’s not what this is about.” A waver ran through Antonio’s words.
“I’m asking Justin,” Emily said pointedly.
Justin reached for denial, to make her feel better, but he didn’t grasp it quickly enough.
“Fuck.” Emily stepped back, face twisting in pain.
“But you two look so good together, I couldn’t say anything.” Justin struggled for the right words to fix the situation.
“I can’t do this.” Emily spun and strode into one of the rooms, shutting the door behind her.
At least she didn’t slam it.
Antonio sank onto the couch. “Wow. You have shitty timing. Ten years, and you pick now to figure things out.”
Justin cringed at the words. Antonio wasn’t kicking him out or telling him to go fuck himself. The realization offered little consolation. “This isn’t what I wanted. And don’t tell me I should have thought it through first. I’ve spent the last month missing you and trying to figure out why and admitting to myself how I feel. I wouldn’t be here, though, if I thought... I should have known the two of you would wind up together. You wouldn’t have made the move if you weren’t falling, and you always got along better with Emily than I did.”
“Jealous?”
“Immensely.” The answer slipped out without thought. Justin realized how true it was. He flew here to confess his love to Antonio, and now he was envious he didn’t have Emily. Fuck, he was a selfish prick.
“You couldn’t have known.” Antonio sounded sympathetic. “You took her at her word that we were friends. What else could you do?”
“You’re taking this well.”
Antonio gave a barking laugh. “I’m screaming on the inside. I don�
��t know whether to deck you or kiss you, and neither one matters, because Emily needs me. I need to talk to her.”
Justin stood and crossed the room in time to grab Antonio’s arm before he could knock on the bedroom door. “Let me?” Justin didn’t know what he was going to say, but he broke this; he needed to fix it.
Antonio held up his hands in surrender and backed away.
Justin knocked. “Can I come in?”
There was no response.
“Emily?” he said.
Seconds later, the latch snicked, and the door creaked open an inch. Justin nudged it wider and saw her standing at the other side of the room, facing a wall covered with photographs of Milan. He walked toward her but stopped about a foot back. He was intensely aware of Antonio watching from the doorway.
She pointed at one of the photos. “I took that the day we got here. I was completely jetlagged, and riding the high of being someplace new.” She gestured toward another one. “We took a weekend trip to Rome. I saw the freaking Sistine Chapel and the Colosseum.”
He looked at the collage of images. Some were of Antonio, others of her or the both of them or buildings and landscapes. All of them radiated her passion.
She slumped her shoulders. “This is a lifetime of memories from less than a month. I’m not saying I live in some sort of magical utopia, but I’m really fucking happy with our life here.”
“Tell me what I have to say to make this right.”
Emily shook her head. “I don’t know.”
That was better than you can’t. Justin hated confronting this frigid side of her. It was worse than in those early days, when the two of them clashed. Back then, the last thing he wanted was to like her, even professionally.
Now, if she refused to forgive him, it would hurt as much as Antonio leaving. The revelation hit him like a fist to the gut. “Help me figure it out.”
“You scare me, Justin. No, that’s not quite right. You terrify the hell out of me.” She whirled to face him, and he was stunned to see the red rimming her eyes.
“Why?” Justin would do whatever it took to make this right.
“Because you have the ability to take away the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and you act like it’s nothing. Like that’s not the most important power in the universe. And at the same time, you have the ability to be the other half of that same best thing ever, and that’s chills me to my core.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” Antonio’s voice carried from the back of the room.
Emily looked past Justin. “Living it is different than saying it.”
“And I’m not trying to break the two of you up.” Justin poured sincerity into his words. “Though if you’re looking for a third...” No. Stupid. Bad. This was the worst way to go about making this better.
The twist of her lips said she agreed. “I can’t do what we did before. I won’t be an excuse for the two of you to be together without admitting that’s what you’re doing.”
“Never.” Antonio moved next to Justin. “I promised you that, and I do mean it. I won’t break your heart. I don’t want to. I need you.”
The passion in his words threatened to snap Justin’s heart in two. How could he hope to come between them? Wait. He was still looking at it wrong. He didn’t want to drive Antonio and Emily apart, obviously. But he wanted to be a part of this thing they shared. To have them both.
Emily crossed her arms. “I don’t know that letting Justin into our lives works on anything beyond a hypothetical level.”
They discussed him that way? Justin couldn’t ignore the overjoyed feeling inside, but he did manage to keep it from his face. “It can work, if you’re interested.” He was in his element. Shooting from the hip. Letting momentum drive his reply. “The two of you have this deep, passionate bond, and that doesn’t have to change.
“You and me?” He made sure he had Emily’s eye. “That doesn’t have to change either. I miss that heat. I miss you as much as I do Antonio. And all three of us, when we put our pretenses and insecurities aside—we’re brilliant together. If you’re willing to hang onto all of that and let him and me explore what I’ve been slow to recognize, then we can find that intimacy that comes from watching and being part of it at the same time.” He summoned her words from the first night they met.
She smiled. “You remember.”
“It’s only been a few months. God, has it really only been three months? Yeah, I remember.”
Antonio glided his palm down her arm, pulling her out of the defensive pose. “We all have to agree to this, passerotta. Your opinion matters as much as Justin’s.”
“I do want it.” Her confession made Justin’s heart soar. “But it still terrifies me.”
“Like moving to Italy on a whim?” Justin asked. “Or falling in love, in the first place? Do you think it doesn’t scare the fuck out of me?”
“I’m starting to wonder if anything frightens you.” Emily gave a nervous laugh.
“Loving you does, and I do love you.” It felt incredible to say the words. Justin looked at Antonio. “Loving him at least as much—frightening as hell. And I know what I said before you left, and I lied. I was wrong. I love you, and I think I always have, and I’m sorry I was too dense to see it sooner.”
The corners of Antonio’s mouth twitched up. “It’s hard to plan ahead when you spend so much time being impulsive, rash, and irresistible.”
“Not quite what I was going for.” Justin grinned. “But I’ll take it. Can we give this a chance?” He turned back to Emily. “All of us?”
She screwed up her face, and the seconds ticked away without an answer. Finally, her expression softened. “Do I get to watch the two of you make out? Because I’ve never seen that, and I bet it’s pretty hot.”
“It is.” Justin faced Antonio, tangled his fingers in his friend’s hair, and crushed their mouths together. Relief and need crashed around him, dragging a groan from his chest.
Antonio glided his palms down Justin’s back, gripped his ass, and pulled him close until their bodies molded together as one. Antonio’s erection dug into Justin’s pelvis, hard and insistent.
When Emily said this was scary, she had no idea. Justin couldn’t fathom what he was about to walk into. But with his cock pressed between him and Antonio, he couldn’t wait to explore and figure it out.
“Oh, hell. I was right. You were right.” Emily’s breathy exclamation penetrated Justin’s haze of enjoyment.
Antonio broke the kiss to look at her. “About what?”
She smirked, mischief dancing in her eyes. “First night we met? Justin told me he had a sexy Italian friend he’d go gay for. And we screwed to a fantasy of you sucking him off.”
Justin couldn’t believe she’d shared that. Then again, maybe he should be surprised she kept it to herself for so long. “It was a heat-of–the-moment kind of thing.” He didn’t want to deny it. He was grateful to have it out in the open. “I should have paid closer attention to myself.”
“No. Being right once doesn’t mean it’s smart to listen to you inebriated the rest of the time.” There was no malice in Antonio’s voice.
“As I was saying”—Emily interrupted—“watching you two together is making me kind of wet and squirmy. So if you want to keep it up, maybe shed a few—or most—of your clothes, I won’t complain.” She pulled out a chair from her desk. “I’ll be here, playing with myself, while you figure out which tab goes into which slot.”
Justin’s skin heated to volcanic, and his cock threatened to burst his zipper. He pulled Antonio into another kiss, memorizing the taste, the smell, the sounds... All of it.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Antonio almost believed this was a dream—the most exquisite he could have landed in. Kissing Justin. Exploring every inch of his body, as clothes came off. Not having to question what it meant or if it would last past tonight.
His lips burned from the scrape of five o’clock shadow and a string of hungry kisses that seemed
to go on forever but at the same time not long enough. Justin studied him as if he were dessert and the only dilemma was where to start.
Thanks to Emily’s not-so-subtle nudging when the three started working together, Antonio already had the memory of Justin’s naked form etched in his mind. It was low-res and disappointing, in comparison to standing in front of the real thing.
Antonio traced his fingers along the lines of Justin’s tattoos, following the same path with his gaze. Antonio glided down a chiseled chest and over a flat stomach, to tease Justin’s cock with a feather-light touch.
Justin mimicked the contact without hesitation and groaned at each new caress. Antonio was torn between the desire to spend hours exploring, and finding release for the diamond-hard insistence throbbing between his legs. Fortunately, this wasn’t a one-off experience.
Antonio thought he might pass out when Justin said, I love you—words he’d waited forever to hear in that voice and never expected to.
Justin’s dick was longer, but not as wide as Antonio’s, and the girth was an intoxicating warmth against Antonio’s palm.
“In case you’re missing something...” Emily’s voice blended into the moment, instead of shattering it.
Antonio turned his head to see her standing next to them, clothes gone and stunning body on display. He was so busy staring, it took him a moment to realize she held something.
“One of many reasons we can’t do this without you. You’re the details lady.” Justin kissed her on the forehead, the tip of the nose, and then the lips, before taking the lube and condom from her.
She gave Antonio a playful smile and walked away. He watched the wiggle of her ass. She dropped into her chair and cupped her breast, gently kneading as she watched the show. Justin pulled from Antonio’s grip, settled a palm on Antonio’s cheek, and turned his head.
“I’m over here,” Justin said. He captured Antonio’s mouth with his again, then broke away. “Turn around.”
Antonio’s anticipation spiked through his chest, and he obeyed.
Emily looked enraptured with the show. She parted her legs and slid her hands along the inside of her thighs, giving him a teasing glimpse of her gorgeous pussy.
Their Nerd: An MMF Ménage Romance (Two Plus One Book 1) Page 21
