by Graham Hall
Valentine’s Day 2011
Another Valentine’s Day is upon us. Oops? Did you forget to get your special someone something? Well here are a few last minute gift ideas for your sweetheart that is sure to make your day unforgettable (whether you’ll want to forget it or not is an entirely different story).
This idea came to my email just a couple weeks ago in the form of a marketing newsletter: why not get your special someone an iPad? Seriously you can afford it right? I’m sure she won’t get the impression that you’re trying to buy her love either. (I’ll be your special someone if you buy me an iPad…)
Or why not be totally creative and give your sweetheart those nasty heart-shaped edible pieces of chalk with phrases printed on them. What better way to tell her “I luv u” or “u rock”. Seriously, she will not be expecting that.
Also in the candy department, get her some edible underwear. Seriously, thats probably one of the best gag gifts you can give someone. I mean, c’mon who wouldn’t get a kick out of edible underwear? It’s such a pointless…oh…I just figured it out.
Ok well this just got awkward. Happy Valentine’s Day I guess…
Games and the App Store
In the summer of 2008 Apple opened it’s app store with the release of iOS 2.0. Nobody could have predicted that this app store could change the face of portable gaming, leaving Nintendo, the king of games-on-the-go, quaking in their boots.
When Apple first announced the App Store I was ecstatic. Just months before the announcement I had sent an email to Steve Jobs asking him if Apple had any plans to allow 3rd party apps on the iPhone. I remember exactly what he said, in typical Steve Jobs fashion: “We’re working on it.” In hindsight, I wish I had saved a copy of the email for posterity. Live and learn.
Even with all this excitement I never expected games to be a huge part of the App Store. For me, portable gaming came in the form of a Nintendo DS with physical buttons, not the greatest touchscreen phone on the market (at the time). This still holds mostly true for me, though I do have a few games loaded onto my iPod touch for those times I forget my DS at home. In my opinion iOS devices can’t really stand up to the DS (or dare I say the PSP) as far as gaming goes. Though I’m not going to beat the dead horse of “touch controls suck”, I have played plenty of games with well implemented touch controls.
The App Store has popularized the idea of ‘cheap games’. Why do we have to pay $30+ for a brand new DS game when we can get an iOS game for 99¢? The problem with this mentality is that a $30 DS game generally offers a much deeper gameplay experience, while a 99¢ iPhone game tends to offer very little in the way of depth. There is nothing inherently wrong with these bite-sized games, they’re perfect if you need to pass the time waiting at the DMV but if you want to sit down for an hour or 2 and just relax and play a game you’ll find yourself getting bored pretty quickly.
On the App Store you’ll be hard pressed to find a game that costs more than $10. In order to stay competitive, developers have to sell their games cheap, and to do that they have to cut a lot of corners. As a result, games on iOS have become cheap, mass-produced, disposable, commodities. There are a good number of fantastic games, but they tend to get buried under the crap and shovelware.
Great gaming experiences are rare on any platform but it seems harder to find them on iOS. For every Chaos Rings there are 50 Angry Birds (yes I went there). I have over 100 games for iOS (only 22 currently loaded on my iPod) but can you guess how many games I’ve spent more than 1 hour playing? By my estimation, 12. How many for more than 10 hours? 1, maybe 2. As an extreme example, I have logged over 170 hours on Pokémon Platinum. So I would have to buy 170 somewhat decent iOS games to get that amount of play time and those games tend to be at least $3 so I’d be looking at $500 for 170 iOS games vs $35 for 1 DS game.
Now I’m not the kind of person who goes around smack-talking casual games, hell I’ve played more Bejeweled than I care to admit, they have an important place in the market. But the App Store has created a weird race to the bottom price war, as a result even the hardcore games tend to have weak gameplay, and those that play well are mostly ports from other platforms.
If someone offered a deep, highly polished game on the iOS for $20 (which I think is a fair price after factoring out cost of media and packaging) on par with some of the best DS and PSP games it would fail. Why? Because the App Store has created this skewed price perception. Anything over $2.99 is beyond the impulse buy category and anything above $10 is unthinkable! This is something that Apple can’t really fix unfortunately, and while the iOS devices are fantastic for music, movies, the internet, and apps, they seem to be doomed when it comes to deep gaming experiences that hardcore gamers crave.
Music
I’m not a musician at all, though I did play trumpet in my middle school’s band. Even so, I still find the subtleties of music compelling. Call me a nerd but my favorite thing to to while listening to music is to listen to all the details, and kind of explore how the sound is constructed.
There are always little details in the music that you don’t pick up on while just passively listening. You really have to focus and it becomes easier to isolate something like a subtle drum beat that you may be subconsciously aware of, but don’t really hear until you’re looking for it.
My main focus is visual art but I feel that I can appreciate the thought that goes into constructing a single piece of music. Both mediums rely on subtleties that the viewer/listener usually isn’t consciously aware of but can affect them in some way. Wether it’s a color, shape, rhythm, or musical tone, it has some kind of psychological effect.
When I’m creating something, I look at colors like a composer looks at musical notes. I pick my colors carefully. Imagine if a composer just used random notes, chances are their song would be an ugly, overstimulating mess, much like if I were to choose random colors.
Why I Hate Call of Duty
I’m not really the kind of person who hates something just because it’s popular (just check my iTunes library), it just seems to me that the more popular something gets, the crappier it gets and the lazier its creators get (with few exceptions).
I used to enjoy Call of Duty. No really, I did. I played the hell out of 2 and 3, but since then the series has lost my interest. With each iteration it seems that very little new things are brought to the table. The 4th game, Modern Warfare, changed the traditional World War II setting to a present day setting. Since then the series has become a major success, not because the games are good, but because Activision is good at marketing.
I’m not saying a well marketed product is always bad, but marketing has a lot more to do with the success of the product than the actual quality. For example the iPod is an wonderful little gadget, but it’s not popular because it’s the best portable media player on the market (which it is, IMO), it’s popular because Apple is great at marketing.
So why do I have so much hate for a video game? Why do I care what other people play? Well one major reason has to do with online multiplayer. I enjoy playing video games online with other people but every time a new Call of Duty comes out, the multiplayer lobbies for games that are actually good are pretty bare. It’s pretty frustrating when you want to play online but everybody else is playing the latest Call of Duty. It must be even more frustrating for developers who put a lot of work into their games only to have the vast majority of their multiplayer community snagged by Activision’s re-skinned shovelware.
Well then why don’t I just buy a Call of Duty game so I can have a rich online experience with lots of other people? Well because I don’t have $60 to blow on a game that really has no entertainment value to me.
The problem with Call of Duty is that it doesn’t really add anything to the shooter genre. It’s a bland ‘run to the next objective while shooting down anybody who gets in your path’ game. It completely forgoes the puzzles and the exploration that makes shooters so fun.
So why remove impo
rtant and proven elements from a game genre? Dumbed down games appeal better to the masses. It’s the same line of thought that lead Square-Enix to the sub-par game that was Final Fantasy XIII. I do believe that games should be more accessible to more people but dumbing them down is just lazy.
I look at the Pokémon series as a perfect example of an increasingly complex game that still manages to be accessible. In Pokémon you can get through the game with just a basic knowledge of the mechanics, or you can really get into it and learn about stats, EV training, and breeding. It doesn’t limit hard core players and it doesn’t alienate casual players.
So Activision, if you take some time on a new Call of Duty game, which God forbid will mean no more yearly installments, really add something worthwhile and add some depth to the gameplay for the people who want it, then you have yourself a new customer. Not that you care, because you seem to be able to sell this garbage to millions of people regardless of quality.
Silly, Silly Humans
There’s a reason I tend to shy away from religion and politics on my blog, with a few exceptions. No matter what you say about either of those topics you’re guaranteed to piss someone off. Even something that sounds non-atagonistic like “I agree with Obama on a lot of issues but don’t agree with his methods” would send both Liberal and Conservative people into a tizzy. Not saying that’s my opinion on the matter, it just serves as an example (that clarification probably ticked more people off).
So for those of you still reading, first off, thank you. Secondly, doesn’t this drive you crazy? Part of what makes the human race so special is that we’re all very different. You’d think that we could all just put our differences aside for once. Instead we judge people who are different then us. “That conservative is an idiot.” “That muslim is a terrorist.” These are all broad generalizations that even the best of us seem to succumb to.
Another fun factoid about us humans is that we hate to be wrong. We automatically think we’re right and everyone else is wrong, stupid, or evil. “You’re an idiot for voting for Obama!” “You’re going to Hell for not believing in Jesus!” Yes, people do say things like this. Why? The fear of being wrong, plain and simple.
I used to be of the belief that if everyone was the same the world would be better. And in a sense, I think it would be. But what would really be even better is if the world was still as diverse as it is, but everyone accepted and embraced that diversity. Because at the end of the day, does it really matter who someone voted for, or wether or not that person believes in a higher power?
Embrace diversity. Accept the fact that even you might be wrong. But at the same time believe in what you believe, and allow others the right to believe what they believe without being judged or persecuted. Sounds beautiful doesn’t it? Well for some people, it’s a pretty scary concept. We’re just a bunch of silly, silly humans.
I Can Haz Epic Space Battlez?
Forgive the lame title.
I realized something the other day. Something I’m surprised I didn’t realize sooner. Where are the space combat games? Games like Rogue Squadron and Star Fox were some of my favorite games of the last couple console generations (I can’t tell you how many hours I spent playing Rogue Squadron 2 on the GameCube). Now here I am, with the PS3, dreaming of how awesome a space combat game would be on the latest hardware.
I spent some time searching, in vain, for a space combat game for the PS3. The closest thing I could find was some crappy multiplayer thing inside PlayStation Home. It’s quite depressing to think how much potential there is for an epic space combat game on the PS3 that could put the previous games in the genre to shame. Not to mention the multiplayer possibilities.
Pokémon Black: A Review
I’ve played every iteration of Pokémon since the originals came out on the GameBoy, and before I get started I’ll just say that yes the core game is still the same as the originals. People say that Pokémon is just the same game over and over with minor improvements and I can’t really disagree. I am of the opinion that “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”, and the Pokémon series has followed that mantra to a tee. Nintendo hasn’t made any revolutionary changes to the series in the past 15 years, but that’s because they’ve chosen to refine the experience.
One of the most obvious additions brought to the series are the 150 new Pokémon, bringing the total number of creatures to well over 600, and frankly it shows. I do somewhat miss the simple yet adorable designs of the first two iterations of the series (Red and Blue & Silver and Gold), and it seems that the designs and names seem to get more outlandish and uninspired. Also, catching them all has become somewhat impossible.
Another thing you’ll notice as you go along is that there are no familiar faces. In fact, not a single Pokémon from a previous version will show up until after you complete the main story. While I disliked this at first, I grew to enjoy the challenge of the unknown. My near memorization of the strengths/weaknesses of certain types didn’t help much when I had no idea what type Bouffalant is.
The story is the deepest so far in any Pokémon game thus far and deals with the morality of using Pokémon for battle. The obligatory team of villains, known as Team Plasma, and lead by the mysterious N, want to free Pokémon. But they use Pokémon for battles, which is kinda hypocritical. It has an interesting ending, so I won’t spoil it for you. It’s definitely not the strongest of stories, but it does the job. Of course there is still the aspect of defeating the 8 gyms and beating the Elite Four. After you beat the game there’s plenty of post game content. There are a total of 3 more towns to visit, several previously inaccessible areas to explore, and more Pokémon to catch.
But this game brings more to the table than just new Pokémon, a new region, and a deeper story. It also brings animated battle sprites (FINALLY!) and some weird 3D camera motion which make battles way more visually interesting. Also, the game finally makes good use of the DS’s 3D hardware with really nice 3D effects and angles that really give scale to the world you’re exploring.
The introduction of seasons that change each month is also a nice touch. It works similar to the day/night and day-of-the-week systems in that certain events only happen and some Pokémon can only be caught depending on the season. I would have liked to see more done with it visually, as in most cases the only visual cue is the name of the season popping up when you start playing. I would have preferred obvious visual cues throughout the games world, like trees with brown leaves in winter, or blossoming flowers in spring, but it seems that only certain areas in the game have these visual cues. Oh well, maybe they’ll fix this when the obligatory Pokémon Grey comes out in a year or two.
The game also sports some new online features which were supposed to become active by now but due to the earthquakes in Japan, Nintendo has delayed the launch to conserve energy. When the online portion will be available is not clear, but I’m willing to wait a little longer if it means it’ll help the people in Japan. As far as I know online battles and trading still work, and they’re even easier to access than before, as it’s now integrated in with the other multiplayer functions in the Pokécenters.
So yeah, my verdict probably won’t come as any shock. Pokémon Black, and it’s companion version White, add sufficient new content for Pokémon fans and newcomers to enjoy, but if you haven’t really enjoyed a previous Pokémon game chances are you won’t like this one.
My (Kinda) Quick Thoughts on Android
I’ve been using an Android phone for a few months now (specifically the Motorola Backflip) after destroying the screen on my iPhone 2G. I couldn’t really afford a new iPhone so I settled for the Backflip. Now I wish I had waited and got the iPhone 3GS for $50 but I had no idea that just a couple months later the price would drop. I’m still kicking myself though.
Well I’m not here to bash Android. Not at all. I just want to share my personal experiences with Android. First off I should say a couple major problems I have that I don’t really attribute to
the Android OS.
First off, the reception sucks and I get dropped calls a lot, especially in my apartment. I attribute this to the poor Motorola hardware, and the fact that my phone prefers to use 3G over 2G even if the reception is better for 2G coupled with the fact that there is no way to turn 3G off. Secondly, the phone is slow and can’t run games at a half decent framerate (not even Angry Birds, I kid you not). I attribute this again to the crappy Motorola hardware, a cheap CPU, and a pathetic amount of RAM.
Ok, now that my gripes with my specific phone are out of the way, the rest of this blog entry will focus on the Android OS itself.
Let’s first hit upon the open-ness aspect. Everyone, including Google, trumpet the fact that Android is an open OS. Ok, to an extent it is. You can customize it to your liking, replace pretty much anything with 3rd party software (even the home and lock screens!). This is nice, but is it really open? I would argue that it’s not. In fact I would argue that Android is not truly open.
Now before you Droid-bots start flaming me with hate mail, let me explain my position. Have you ever tried to uninstall carrier apps from your Android? Or for my fellow AT&T users, have you ever tried installing an app from a source other than the Android Market? Unless you’re a turbo-nerd who hacked their phones, chances are you had no luck. Until every user can install and uninstall apps at their will, remove the bloated manufacturer custom UIs, and install custom ROMs, I will continue to say Android is not open.
Now this isn’t to say I dislike Android. It’s not the most well designed mobile phone OS out there, but the default Google apps have a Google-eque charm to them that I have a soft spot for. The Maps app in particular is one of my favorites. Some of the apps can get little daunting, like the settings and music apps. Hell I hate the Music app on Android so much I carry around my iPod when I want music.
So Android is a pretty decent mobile OS. It’s not going to win any design awards, and some of the 3rd party apps make me want to vomit, but it’s does what it’s supposed to do. I just think Google needs to tighten the reigns a bit and set some standards, because for all of Androids problems, the biggest one is consistency, and I think when thats solved the rest will fall into place.
Cherish What You Have
So the other day I read this blog ( https://www.jamesshelley.net/2011/05/fight-consumerism-love-your-stuff/ ) about loving your stuff. It was very interesting so I wanted to share my thoughts on the topic.
Now I am by no means a materialistic person. In fact I go so far as rejecting objects that I don’t see as adding anything to my life. Our lives have become over encumbered with useless trinkets that don’t do anything to enrich our lives simply because we allow these objects to make our lives more complicated.
The biggest enemy of this way of thinking is consumerism, which is basically the attitude that buying lots of shit makes you a better person. Wether it’s in your own eyes, or someone else’s, the more you can buy the better you look. The ads people are bombarded with every day are probably the biggest contribution to consumerism.
Not only do we buy objects that don’t really enrich our lives, but we tend to treat the objects we do own as disposable. Something breaks? We just throw it away and get a new one without a second thought. A new iPod comes out? The old one is cast aside as a useless piece of junk.
Consumerism has lots of detrimental effects on our lives. It can lead to debt and money problems, stress, and depression. While indeed these are problems one can have due to circumstances beyond their control, why would anyone choose to inflict such issues upon themselves?
Here are some of the rules I try to abide by:
Only buy stuff that you’d actually need for survival, or stuff that would enrich your life in some way. The first point is pretty obvious (I hope), though the second is more vague. Basically, if you can’t see something playing a large role in your life on a regular basis, don’t buy it. Avoiding impulse purchases helps. Also, don’t buy something and try to find a use for it, buy something BECAUSE you have a use for it.
If something breaks, try to fix it. What do you have to lose? It’s already broken! If you don’t feel comfortable fixing it yourself, find someone who knows how. Sometimes it can be a fun project trying to fix something, thought if you’re not very handy you’d be better off leaving it in someone else’s hands.
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. This rule is especially relevant in the tech world, so as an example I’m going to use iPods. You bought an iPod and it’s been working great for you, it does everything you need it to and more. Then comes a new version, and suddenly you have the need for more features. Resist that, just because a new version comes out with a new gimmick doesn’t mean that your current iPod (or anything really) is suddenly useless.
Be resourceful. You don’t always have to go out and buy something new just to complete a certain task. Maybe you can find a way to do it with something you already have. It may not always be elegant, but it can be rewarding, and you may even surprise yourself.
Donate or sell things you no longer need. If something has outlived it’s usefulness to you don’t just leave it sitting around cluttering up your life, and certainly don’t throw it out. Sell it or donate it. Put it up on Amazon, see if anyone you know is having a yard sale, or just drop it off at Goodwill or the Salvation Army. Or you could even give it to someone you know if they’re in need of it.
Well that was a bit more long-winded than I had originally intended…
Quick Thoughts on YouTube Movie Rentals
So YouTube launched it’s own movie rental service today. It seems pretty standard. 30 days to start watching and then it expires 24 hours after you start the movie. Dunno why but with the same prices, and the same terms as other online movie rental services I really do fail to see what it offers over it’s competitors (especially Amazon which offers streaming).
Do we really need another cookie cutter online movie rental service? How about some innovation!
Portal 2: A Kinda Sorta Review
Last year I heard about this game called Portal 2. I had dabbled with the original game but never really played it much. I had bought the Orange Box mainly for the Half-Life games, but I never gave Portal a second thought. The announcement of Portal 2 piqued my interest, and I figured I should give Portal another try, but other games got in the way and I never got around to playing it.
Finally the game came out but I didn’t have the money to get it at the time, which ended up working out for the better. Last week I ordered the PS3 version of Portal 2 for $39. Now what to do while I wait for it to come in? Well with the PSN down I figured it would be a great time to finally play through the first game. So I did. And it was really fun.
So a few days ago Portal 2 arrived at my doorstep and I was pretty excited to start playing. It took me a few days of playing on and off but I finally finished the game and it was a very satisfying experience. My only complaint about the first game was the fact that it just left me wanting more, and not in a good way. Yes the game was fun, but it wasn’t really long enough to be satisfying (in before “thats what she said).
Portal 2 is not only the perfect length, but the story is pretty fun to play through. I won’t summarize the story as it could reveal a few spoilers, but suffice to say there is a bit of a twist part way through. The story in the first game was a bit of a surprise, in that you didn’t even know there was a story until the end, which I enjoyed, but I’m glad they didn’t pull that out again.
I’ve heard people say that Portal 2 is easier than the first, but to me they seemed about the same. I found myself stumped a bit more in 2 than I did in 1 but I attribute that to the increased length. Sure, once you figure them out the puzzles are a piece of cake (see what I did there?), but as the puzzles become more complex figuring them out becomes that much harder. Though at one point in the game a few of the puzzles are absurdly easy, which is supposed to be part of the humorous element.
Portal 2 is n
ot void of it’s predecessors witty humor, which can be annoying if thats not your thing (but why wouldn’t it be?). The main antagonist of the first game, GlaDOS returns to tear down your self-esteem once more with some new humorous insults. “I’m looking at your latest test results. They say you’re a horrible person. Odd, we weren’t even testing for that.”
LIke the first game though. Portal 2 has limited replay value, mainly because the puzzles aren’t as fun to solve the second time. Though Valve should be fixing this with some upcoming DLC which is going to add some challenge modes. Also there is a co-op mode with all new puzzles included with the game, but with the PSN down I haven’t had a chance to play that yet.
Now that you can get it on Amazon for $39 on the PS3 and Xbox 360, and $29 on the PC/Mac (though as of this writing it’s still $49 on Steam) I would totally recommend it, especially if you played the first game and were left wanting more.
Cable TV Is Dying, Get Over It!
With the advent of YouTube, Netflix, and Hulu, as well as Amazon Video and iTunes, can someone tell me why cable TV is still around? I mean, besides the fact that cable companies and TV networks are dragging their heels. You can’t? Neither can I.
In an age where we can stream HD content over the internet on demand right into our living rooms, broadcast TV has become OBSOLETE! But like any change, the corporations involved will fight tooth-and-nail to keep things the way they were instead of embracing the change. These corporations think they have everything to lose, and unless they embrace the change, then they’re right.
Let’s take a look at the music industry. Not long ago everyone who bought music purchased them on CDs. The music industry was afraid of the internet because they, like the film and TV industry today, believed that the internet would destroy their business. Now I have a lot of negative things to say about the music industry, but I have to give them credit where it’s due. Sure it took a lot of nudging by Apple, but the music industry eventually embraced the new way of doing things and guess what? It’s still around, and it’s still as successful, if not more, than it was before the ‘revolution’.
Now there is one extra obstacle with online video content, and that’s cable. Most of us have our internet service provided by the very companies who provide our cable TV, and they seem very keen to keep customers locked into both services. We’re starting to see things like data caps on most cable ISPs because they want to keep people paying for cable, or get them to pay crazy amounts of money for their internet connection. This cuts into the potential success of services like Netflix, Hulu, and iTunes. While data caps are usually more than enough for “regular” use (web surfing, email, music, gaming), they handicap a users ability to use online video services.
Here’s a suggestion for cable companies. Don’t fight the change. Cable TV is dying, get over it! Start phasing out your cable services over the next few years, and offer on demand services online. Don’t try to hamper competition with data caps, just try to beat it with more content, and integrated services.
Here is an example plan selection I came up with (based on my internet plan with Cox, who don’t have enforced internet caps BTW):
$45/month for 15Mb/s down, reasonable caps (maybe 700GB-1TB if you insist on capping). No integrated video services.
$60/month for same as above except with streaming HD video to your computer or TV.
Or just stick with your current business model and become an obsolete dinosaur by the end of the decade. Cox, Comcast, Verizon, and whoever else offers cable internet, you all have a choice. Embrace the change, or become irrelevant.
The Cloud
So it’s becoming more apparent by the day that our data in the cloud is becoming an inevitability. Is it scary? Yes. Change is scary. If you asked me just a few months ago if I would want my personal data stored in the cloud I would respond with a resounding “hell no!”
But when Apple announced iCloud I quickly realized that a cloud future isn’t so bad. That is, as long as data can also be stored on the users device.
Google has a different idea. They believe that all users must have all their data in the cloud and nowhere else. No Internet connection? Deal with it. And that’s what has turned me off of cloud computing until now.
Apple’s iCloud takes the approach I believe is the correct way to go. While I don’t know exactly how iCloud will work it seems like the concept is similar to Dropbox. Your data is still on your device but it gets pushed up with the cloud for backup and syncing with other devices.
Someday though I think that a complete cloud solution like Google is trying to create will be viable. But not until high speed Internet is easily accessible everywhere.
What do you think of cloud computing?
Sports
So I get home from work and I do my rounds of the RSS feeds and I come across a photo gallery of pictures from the riots in Vancouver last night. Now before I continue, I should say that I live in Rhode Island which means that, by law I’m supposed to be a Bruins fan. The reality is I really don’t give two craps, so yeah. Whatever.
So yeah the Bruins beat the Canucks and some of the people of Vancouver had a giant collective hissy fit that destroyed property and even worse injured, and even killed a few people. Well that’s wonderful, sounds like a wholesome family outing at the hockey rink. (To quote Homer Simpson, “In case you couldn’t tell I’m being sarcastic!”)
Honestly, it’s stuff like this that make me hate sports. While I don’t understand, I do appreciate the appeal and why people get so excited. But really when you break it down, it’s just a game. A game that some people take way to seriously. There are enough problems in our world to get upset about, why would anyone voluntarily create more things to get upset about.
I am seriously fed up with the childishness of some people. What happened last night in Vancouver was essentially the same as a baby having a fit because he didn’t get his way. I don’t care how into sports you are, you can not defend actions like that.
World hunger? Homelessness? Global climate change? Crime? Aren’t any of those worth getting serious about? Or are we just gonna get violently upset when our man-crush doesn’t make a goal?
5 Things I Hate About Facebook
Despite being a Facebook user since they opened their virtual doors to high school students, I have had quite a few things that really irk me. Over time these issues have been remedied but where Facebook stands now, it still really sucks. Why do I continue to use it? Because I’m an idiot.
Anyway here are the things that really tick me off about Facebook in it’s current state.
1.People You May Know. Facebook, in a vain attempt to be helpful, searches the friends lists of the people on your friends list and then randomly presents them to you. 95% of the time I have no idea who that person is, and the other 5% are people who I have no desire to stay in contact with for one reason or another. The point I’m trying to make is that if I care enough for someone to be on my friends list then they’d already be there, so STOP TELLING ME WHO MY FRIENDS ARE!
2.Facebook Chat. AIM’s retarded and gimpy little brother. Yes, while AIM was once the go-to service for online chat, Facebook Chat won us all over with it’s cry for pity and people have been flocking to it in droves. I have about the same amount of AIM buddies as I do Facebook friends and at any given time there are at least 3 times as many people on Facebook Chat than on AIM. Facebook Chat has no voice or video chat, no file transfers, and you’re basically relegated to using a tiny 3 inch chat box on the bottom of a cluttered web page. Well now I see why AIM is the underdog here.
3.Facebook Messages. This is to email what Facebook Chat is to AIM. I really don’t know what else to say about it. Oh yeah! Integrating it with Facebook Chat in the last major update to the site was BATSHIT INSANE!! What were they thinking? Not only is it stupid to have chat logs stored in an inbox, but it confused the hell out of the Facebook Android app because it tells me I have a new Facebook Message every time s
omebody tries to chat with me. Not to mention the fact that the Facebook Chrome extension can’t even access my messages anymore.
4.Games. Ok, thats a fairly generous term for the crap on Facebook. Now I’ve tried playing games on Facebook, but they are not fun. At all. The only objective I can see in these games is to see how many of your friends you can dupe into helping to grow your farm/city/whatever. Well either that or to see how many clicks of the mouse it takes for your finger to fall off. I for one would like to not horrify my friends with game invites, and I hope they all return the favor. I wouldn’t know for sure though because thankfully I’ve blocked ALL games from sending me messages. Think about that next time you need help growing that stalk of corn.
5.Pokes. Oh God really? Why do these even exist? Yeah ok they were cute way back in 2006, but seriously guys? Somebody pokes you, then Facebook has the gall to ask if you’d like to poke the person back! Whenever somebody pokes you in real life do you poke them back? No you don’t! You turn around and depending on your personality you either punch them in the face or say “what the hell is your problem?” A far more effective way to get somebody’s attention is to talk to them. The same rings true on Facebook. If you want to talk to me then send me a message (despite my hatred of them). If you don’t want to talk then LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!
