Collide
Book 3
Jessica Gilliland
For my Husband, Rob, who never stops encouraging my “Happy, Disney, Everything-is-Magical” personality even though he doesn’t understand or share it.
A Note From Jessica
Thank you so much for taking a chance on Anomaly! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
If you like what you read, please consider writing a review on Amazon for me. I am a new author navigating the rough waters of self publishing. It’s been a very scary experience for me to have strangers reading my stories and opening myself up to criticism, as I’m sure it is for all authors.
Before embarking on this journey, I didn’t realize the immense weight a review can have. I have a new respect for authors and artists who put themselves out there, and I appreciate every single person that takes the time out of their day to spread a little joy and share their experience in a review.
As scary as it can be, it’s also very exciting when someone tells me how much they liked my writing, and it totally makes up for any negativity that comes my way.
If you have any thoughts about the series or just want to chat with me, I’d love to hear from you.
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Amazon Author Page:
Http://www.amazon.com/author/jessicagilliland
Links to each book in the series:
Anomaly (Book 1)
https://www.amazon.com/Anomaly-Jessica-Gilliland-ebook/dp/B07NQJ8NPC
Shift (Book 2)
https://www.amazon.com/Shift-Anomaly-Book-Jessica-Gilliland-ebook/dp/B07NQ3T7QX
Collide (Book 3)
https://www.amazon.com/Collide-Anomaly-Book-Jessica-Gilliland-ebook/dp/B07NQ2JV8L
Defect (Book 4)
https://www.amazon.com/Defect-Anomaly-Book-Jessica-Gilliland-ebook/dp/B07NQ3M6V6
Rise (Book 5)
https://www.amazon.com/Rise-Anomaly-Book-Jessica-Gilliland-ebook/dp/B07NQ4FZL8
Chapter One
Blood pooled at the surface of my skin. The needle pulsed in and out, over and over, creating the sharp black lines that formed the compass on the back of my neck. The symbol of the Nomads—the family that had taken me in and brought me back to life—would now be permanently etched on my skin. It would cover the scar ACT had left when they buried their implant beneath my flesh.
The tattoo artist, Blake, methodically wiped away the excess blood and ink with a wet cloth. His movements were precise and his mind was completely focused. The skilled, repetitive motion was comforting, despite the pain.
Headset's blue eyes were wide and awestruck as he watched the needles move over my skin. Bebe stood at Headset's side, her hand clasped tightly around his, to steady him. Her ability to heal meant she wasn't afraid of blood, open wounds or needles.
"I think that's enough, buddy," Charlie said, scooping Headset up and away from me. She held her hand out for Bebe and they went back out into the waiting room, but not before taking a quick peek and shooting me a wink. Her long blonde ponytail swished from side to side, and I tried to focus on it, and her excitement, to keep my mind off of the pain.
"You doing okay, there?" Cash's smile grew wider, but concern radiated out of him. He sat next to me. He offered moral support, and what was supposed to be a rock-solid emotional grid to hold onto. Unfortunately, his worries about me were sinking into my skin and making my nerves rattle.
He wasn't worried about the pain of the tattoo I was getting. That wasn't that bad. It was the pain of the woman on my left getting a lotus flower on her shoulder, the couple getting wedding rings to my right and most of all, the man in the next stall getting a recreation of Guernica on his back. I could feel all of them simultaneously, and the Guernica guy was heavily into the shading on the right ribs.
"Yeah," I said, trying to keep as still as possible.
"Almost done," he assured me. His knee bounced nervously as his eyes grazed over the tattoo shop at everyone else. Blake gave him a sideways look because he'd just started on me, but Cash wasn't talking about my piece. He was talking about everyone else. He wanted to spare me all the extra agony. He'd even offered to buy out the shop when I insisted it was time for me to get my Nomad mark, but we were on the move again, and needed all the money we had. I couldn't ask him to spend it on something frivolous.
Since the fall of Hawthorn, we’d been living in various hotels as we moved south, down the California coastline. We were forced to abandon the Lair after ACT had tracked us down. We hadn't found anywhere quite like it, and nothing felt like home. We had a tough decision to make. With everything that happened, it didn't make sense to stay so close to the Lair. To Charlie's dismay, we'd briefly discussed moving inland again and finding a place off the grid. We hadn't pulled the trigger yet, but everyday we spent in a cramped hotel, living out of backpacks, pushed us closer to the inevitable.
Dozer went AWOL from ACT after their attack on the Lair and never looked back. He wasn't in the agent game long before being placed with the Nomads, so he had no real insight into their methods, or what they'd do after everything that happened.
"All I know is that ACT doesn't like loose ends, and after what happened at Hawthorn House, us being unaccounted for is like pulling a thread on ACT's torn sweater," Dozer said when we discussed our game plan.
Charlie was the most nervous about our lives on the run. We never stayed in one place more than a week. Our modified van, lovingly dubbed the Beast, still worked despite its busted hood and rusted paint job. When money got low, Cash did his thing, singing on busy streets or farmer’s markets. He made enough to keep us going from hotel to motel. Life on the move hadn’t presented a problem just yet. We were Nomads, after all.
We'd taken Bebe in, since she had no family to speak of. She adapted well, and Headset loved having someone to play with. She was extremely nurturing, always tying his shoes for him and fixing his minor bumps and bruises with her healing powers. In return, he introduced her to the world of comic books and trading cards.
Jeri had taken off to a safe house with the scientists we were able to get out of Hawthorn before it collapsed. He said he would be in touch, but I hadn’t heard from him and I feared the worst.
Bebe and Headset sat on the floor of the waiting room playing a card game with Glitch while Dozer and Charlie flipped through the design book. She and Dozer had gotten exponentially closer since he’d almost been shot by ACT. They spent more time with each other, talking quietly and stealing long glances, but they still denied the chemistry between them. I couldn't tell if it was Dozer's betrayal lingering in their minds or the fact that the flirty beginning of the relationship was just too much fun. Either way, it made my heart happy to see them getting closer. It also tore me up a little. When I was around them, I was reminded of Jason, which reminded me that he was gone, drowned at the bottom of the ocean among the ruins of Hawthorn. It was a downward spiral from there, so I tried to focus on anything else. Usually, that something else was Cash. He was my rock.
I'd known for a while how he felt about me, but after everything that happened, he didn't pursue it. He gave me my space. That meant the world to me, but I also needed something to steady me. Cash did that for me.
"You're all set
," Blake said, pushing back from the table and handing me another mirror to check out the work.
I couldn't see the scar anymore. It was completely covered by the tattoo; a sketchy black compass outline with an eight-point star and a nautical feel. It was exactly like the one the other's had.
"Where'd you get that scar, anyway?" Blake asked, applying ointment to my neck.
"Tracking chip surgically implanted by a secret government agency," Glitch said, grinning, suddenly at my side.
Blake laughed, then we all followed suit.
Cash paid the man and we made our way back to our current hotel. We'd settled at the Hide Away Hotel, close to the San Diego Zoo, and more importantly, connected to Glitch and Dozer's favorite taco spot.
"It's poppin' at the pool, you guys," Glitch said excitedly, dancing a little as we made our way to our rooms in the courtyard area where the hotel's pool and restaurant were. Lights flashed and the fiesta music was blasting. It smelled like grilling meats, and vegetables, and I even detected the sweet smell of churros wafting toward us.
"Can we go to the pool party?" Bebe and Headset asked, bright eyed and hopeful.
Glitch was right there with them, shooting Charlie and toothy grin. "Pleeeeease, Bubbles?" He drawled.
"I'm up for it." Charlie giggled and looked at the rest of us.
"Yeah, let's do it," Cash said.
Charlie squealed a little and took the kids to grab their swimsuits. Glitch, Dozer, Cash and I grabbed an open table and ordered a pitcher of margaritas and a couple of virgin-ritas for the kids.
Charlie and Dozer moved on to the swim up bar to be closer to the kids as they played in the pool. Bebe splashed around in her hot pink suit, pretending to be a mermaid while Headset circled her like a shark in the shallow end.
Glitch made his way to the dance floor and found himself surrounded by a bachelorette party. He threw the bride-to-be around the dance floor. She laughed as he spun her around, her dark curls bouncing up and down to the rhythm of the music. Needless to say, Glitch was in heaven, surrounded by beautiful women with wedding fever.
Charlie and Dozer watched him from the water. She saw me staring and tried to wave me over to join her at the water's edge. I shook my head and immediately tensed at the thought.
Aside from short, nearly scalding showers, I didn't go into the water anymore. I couldn’t stand to be in anything but hot water these days and I never swam in the ocean. Even the thought of it brought me back to Hawthorn. I remembered how it felt under the surface, how the walls closed in on Jason and I; how the rising water suffocated me and flooded into my lungs, and how I welcomed the darkness.
Cash sat across from me, lightly rotating his sweating glass. His warm brown eyes caught mine and broke me out of my dark reverie. A chill ran up my spine.
"You doing okay, Rivera?" he asked, eyebrows raised, concern radiating out of him.
"Yeah, I'm good."
"Really? Because you're about to break that glass." Cash's eyes shifted down to my margarita glass. I hadn't realized I had a vice grip on it. I exhaled and set the glass aside.
"Look, I know this has been rough on you, and moving a round like this isn't helping," he said.
"I'm going to be okay, Cash. I just need some time."
"You know you can talk to me, right? I know what you lost and I can't even begin to understand how you're feeling right now, but I know you're not going to come to terms with it if you keep it all bottled up inside."
He was right, but my anxieties and the trauma of that night were sealed tight. I was afraid if I opened up, I would explode and I wouldn't be able to put myself back together again.
I broke away from his gaze and stared down at my hands and said, "I'm not ready."
Cash sighed and placed his hand over mine.
"I'm going to call it a night," I said, pulling my hand away from his. I offered him a tired smile, but didn't make eye contact again.
"Okay, want me to walk with you?" He asked.
"No, I'll be fine. I'm going to crash the second I get in the door."
"Alright." Cash felt like he wanted to say more, but thought better of it and let me be.
I stood and reached for my bag, but Cash was already up and handing it over to me.
"Thanks," I said, inching by him.
When I looked back, he'd taken off his shirt and was wading into the water to ambush Headset. Though he was playing with the kids, I felt his attention still lingering on me, so I hurried to the room.
We had three adjoining rooms. I shared a room with Charlie and Bebe, but most nights they would crash in front of the television in Glitch, Dozer and Headset's room. It was a two-bedroom suite with a full kitchenette, which was more accommodating for extended stays. Cash had the smallest room all to himself at the end of the hall, but the main suite is where we spent the bulk of our time.
I slid my keycard in and opened the door, relieved we'd left the air conditioning on. I shut the door behind me, undressed and slipped into bed; ready to be dead to the world. Unfortunately, my mind wasn't as ready to check out as my body was. I lay awake a while, staring up at the ceiling, trying to calm my rising nerves.
This is what happened every night. I relived the fall of Hawthorn from the moment I found Jason cradling Stone's body, to the moment I woke up on the beach after Charlie had pulled me out of the water. My mind raced through every decision I'd made, looking for alternatives and possibilities that my friends were still alive. No matter what alternate courses my brain thought of, the outcome was always the same. Jason was dead, Lexa and Mars were probably dead and I couldn't be sure my sister made it out either. Needless to say, my bedtime ritualistic torture never ended with me feeling any resolution, or relief in the knowledge that I'd done all I could. It always just wore my brain out, and eventually I passed out from complete exhaustion.
Chapter Two
I woke up gasping for air. Tears poured out of me, soaking my neck and pillow. In my nightmare, I'd been trapped in Hawthorn again as the water poured in. I'd found Mars, Lexa, and Mia under the water. They were all dead, floating like driftwood in the murky water. Only Jason was still alive, struggling for air.
I took Jason's face in my hands and kissed him. I breathed into him every bit of air I had left in my lungs, until my vision blurred and I felt the salt water pushing its way inside me. His fingers tightened on my arms and I felt his lungs collapse. His body convulsed and his eyes rolled back. The final beat of his heart felt like someone had stabbed me.
Even as I woke, I could still feel the phantom echoes of pain where the salt water burned through my lungs and throat. My limbs moved sluggishly like I were still underwater. I opened my mouth to scream, but nothing came out. At least not a sound. My power leapt from my body and shot outward in a huge blast that shook the room and shattered the mirror, picture frames and television screen. My hands fisted tightly in my sheets and I shut my eyes, waiting for the water to recede and the real world to seep back in.
When my breath came back and my heart slowed, I slid out of bed, tiptoed around the broken shards and grabbed the keycard on my nightstand. I left my room and ran barefoot to the end of the hall, to the place I always ran when my nightmares consumed me.
When I stepped inside, the darkness fled with a soft click and the flicker of a dim light bulb. Cash sat up. His hair was sleep tossed and his eyes tired as they glanced at his bedside clock. It was just passed three in the morning. It was always around that time when I found my way to his room.
I closed the door behind me gently, and leaned back against it.
“Another nightmare?” he asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. I could feel his concern sinking into me.
I only nodded.
“Was that you, a minute ago? The shaking?”
Again, I nodded.
“I broke a lot of stuff. I'm sorry.”
In the tired state between consciousness and sleep, he instinctively pulled back the covers. I slid in next to him, pulled the b
lankets back over us, and pressed in close to him. I rested my head against his chest and rested my arm across his torso. I was still tense, trying hard to get a solid grip on myself. His hand came to my back, passing slow circles over it. He flicked the switch to draw night back down on us and instinctively wrapped around me, resting his chin on the top of my head. We lay quietly together in the dark as my body relaxed and I felt my power subsiding. It curled up inside me, appeased for the time being.
“Which one tonight?” Cash whispered.
“Forever,” I said, closing my eyes.
I didn’t even need to think about it. Of all the songs he'd written, it was my favorite. It never failed me.
After I'd nearly drowned in Hawthorn, he'd sang to me and chased away every feeling I couldn't fight off. His voice was a lot of things to a lot of women, but over time it became like a drug to me. I couldn't sleep without it. I couldn't fully focus or relax. It numbed everything else and left me with the kind of serenity I couldn’t achieve on my own.
I needed Cash and everything he had to give me. Don’t get me wrong, I felt badly about it. I knew how selfish I was being. I knew exactly how he felt about me and how much it destroyed him to have me so near, and so untouchable.
As much as I cared for Cash and didn’t want to hurt him, that selfish, shattered piece of me didn’t care. That piece of me knew he would never deny me anything, and it longed to be soothed by his voice. No matter how hard I fought to hold it back, that piece of me always won out.
So, when the nightmares got too real, and my guilt threatened to unravel me, I ran to him. He always accepted me with open arms. He never complained, and he never asked anything of me. Tonight was no different. Like so many nights since the fall of Hawthorn, I fell asleep listening to the rhythmic pounding of Cash's heart and the sound of his voice.
Collide (Anomaly Book 3) Page 1
