by Jenn Hype
"Bambi," I said with a jerk of my chin. Her eyes narrowed hatefully.
"It's Brandy."
"Oh, my bad."
I'd like to think if my night wasn't already going so terribly I wouldn't have felt so emotional at seeing them. The reason tears sprung to my eyes was a culmination of things, the least of which had anything to do with James and his slut. Running into him during such a vulnerable time only amplified my emotions.
Most women probably would have been angry. Would have wanted to say mean, hurtful things. I wished I felt that way. Maybe the fact that I'd never gotten angry was a sign I never really loved him in the first place. Or maybe it could be attributed to the fact that I rarely got angry. Liam was quite literally the first person to ever make me so mad I thought steam might come out of my ears. Instead of making me want to stay away from him, it only made me want to be around him more, no matter how much I denied it to everyone else. The adrenaline rush I got from our arguments felt thrilling and a little dangerous. Sad that the most exciting part of my life was arguing with someone, eh?
Speak of the devil...
"There you are, sweetie."
Liam slid his arm around my waist and leaned in to press a kiss to the side of my head. Immediately my body sagged into him. Just having him near filled me with relief. Why? No clue. If anything, I probably should have worried Liam would only add to the night's humiliation, but somehow I knew that wasn't the case. He gave me a hard time, but he always seemed to know when to pull back. Hopefully he could tell now was not the time to start with our drama.
"And who are you?" He asked, extending his hand to a stunned-looking James.
"I'm James McCallan. This is my girlfriend, Brandy."
Internally I winced. So it hadn't been about fulfilling a physical need like he'd said after I caught him. There were actual feelings involved. I waited for anger to finally surface but it never came.
"Are you friends of my Clara's?"
I didn't miss the possessive way he asked the question and a thrill ran through me at the thought of actually belonging to Liam. Even though I knew it would never happen, that Liam had no desire to have anyone to call his own, especially someone like me, I couldn't deny I liked the idea of it.
I held my breath, waiting to see how James would respond. He looked uncomfortable, which made sense. What threw me though was how nervous he seemed.
"Clara hasn't told you about me?" James looked to me for confirmation and I shrugged, as if to say he meant so little to me that mentioning him never occurred to me. Pain flashed in his eyes briefly, and a small part of me felt a little victorious for standing up for myself.
"Hmm. Not that I recall. Then again," Liam paused to give me a very sexy smirk, "we don't spend much time talking when we're together."
His implication was clear. Based on the way James started choking on air proved he got the message.
My cheeks heated, dirty images of 'not talking' to Liam assaulting me at the most inconvenient time. Or maybe it was the exact right time. My reaction only confirmed the attraction, making what Liam said believable.
Liam's eyes darted to the bartender delivering an updated bill. Pulling his wallet from his back pocket, he tossed a credit card down and slipped his arm around me again. Our eyes met and all the oxygen was sucked right out of the room. James, the home wrecker, my date that ditched me, the rest of the whole damn world just disappeared. Affection, clear as day, shone from his eyes.
I wanted more than anything to believe it was real. That Liam didn't notice how upset I'd been right before he approached and felt the need to swoop in and be my hero. All the guys that worked for my brother had hero complexes. They lived to serve and they couldn't resist a damsel in distress.
His affection might have been real, but it likely wasn't anything other than something platonic. Over the years I'd gotten good at putting on a front when it came to sexual maturity. Pointing out when I found someone attractive and making remarks about wanting to do dirty things to them usually led people to believe I wasn't as innocent as I truly was, but everyone closest to me knew how inexperienced I was when it came to sex. If Liam had heard, he likely felt an overprotectiveness towards me just like CJ. If anything, he probably viewed me as more of a little sister than a grown woman.
Pushing a strand of hair behind my ear, Liam bent his knees so we were eye level.
"You ready to head out, babe?"
The bartender returned with his card, saving me from having to respond. Words were not an option. If I did try to speak, my voice would be husky and scratchy. Swallowing past the thickness in my throat proved difficult. My entire body was on fire, my breathing erratic and my face burning bright red. Hopefully my makeup covered that, though.
"Well, it was nice meeting you, John," Liam said while grabbing my hand and pulling me to my feet. I reached for the boxes of food but he beat me to it. Never would have pegged Liam as a gentleman. He kept surprising me lately.
"It's James," my ex gritted out. I had to cover my mouth to hide my smile.
"Right, my bad," Liam said, not sounding apologetic at all.
"Thank you," I murmured as he led me to the door. I started to look back and see if James and Brandy were watching us leave, but Liam's hand tugged me forward.
"Don't," he whispered into my ear. "Don't look back. Just keep moving."
I followed his lead, a million questions springing into my mind. I waited until we were outside to start hurling them his direction.
"Why are you here? Why did you tell me not to look back? Do you know who James is or something?"
Pulling me to the side so we weren't blocking the door, Liam shifted us so my back was pressed against the side of the building.
"Blake couldn't come so she called me and filled me in. And no, I have no idea who James is but when I walked in I could clearly tell you were upset. Didn't take a genius to figure out the reason. I took a leap and assumed he was an ex or something, and based on the murder in his eyes when I kissed you, I'd say I guessed right. And he didn't deserve the satisfaction of having you look back."
"You don't even know him." No clue why I was defending James, but Liam making so many assumptions frustrated me.
Liam shrugged. "Don't have to. If being around him upset you, that tells me he's a dick."
He started walking, not bothering to see if I followed him. I considered staying put just to be stubborn, but the desire to save my shoes pushed me forward. With no money for a cab or even the subway, I'd have to walk more than a dozen blocks to my apartment. No thanks.
"You're welcome, by the way," he said nonchalantly once I caught up to him.
"I was going to thank you, you didn't have to point it out. You took off before I had the chance."
He smirked but stayed facing forward.
"Where are we going?" I asked after a block of struggling to keep up with his long strides.
"My place is right around the corner. We're going there to eat. Not a chance am I wasting food that cost as much as I pay for groceries a month."
"Sorry about that. I'll pay you back," I offered, earning a glare from Liam.
"I wasn't saying that to make you feel bad. The only person who should feel bad is the asshole who bailed."
Liam approached a seriously fancy apartment building. I could barely afford the rent for my own apartment because CJ demanded I live somewhere with a doorman for security. I could only imagine how expensive an apartment would be where the lobby looked fancier than a five-star hotel.
Not to be judgy, but I couldn't figure out how Liam could afford such a place. I knew what CJ payed his employees.
As if reading my thoughts, or perhaps sensing my apprehension, Liam turned to me once we were in the elevator and answered all my unspoken questions.
"My dad is a rich prick and I let him pay my rent. He's always been a shit father, so I figure if he wants to pay for me to live somewhere nice and safe, I'll let him. Lately I've been thinking of moving, though. The string
s that come along with it are fucking annoying and I'm getting too old to put up with his shit."
That's a lot more information than I'd expected...
He said it as though it wasn't a big deal, but I could tell by his stiff posture and clenched jaw that his relationship with his dad was a trigger. Why did he share all that with me? Sure, we were trying the friend thing, but Liam didn't strike me as the type of person to spill his secrets to just anyone and we weren't that close yet.
I wanted to say something reassuring, or maybe something light to soften the moment, but I came up empty. What I really wanted to say wasn't nice and I didn't think that would help the situation at all.
"Your dad sounds like a prick."
My hand flew to my mouth, my eyes widening in mortification.
"I can't believe I said that out loud," I said, the words coming out muffled through my hand.
Liam just looked at me. And when the elevator dinged, announcing our arrival, he didn't move towards the doors sliding open. He just stood there with an unreadable expression on his face.
Oh God, what have I done?
CHAPTER TEN
Liam
My mind and body warred with itself, trying to figure out how to respond.
I wanted to kiss her sassy mouth. My sweet, sweet Clara just called my dad a prick. I'd never heard her be anything but polite to everyone except me. The girl wouldn't hurt a fly. Yet she'd called my dad a name with barely any information. Which meant she cared about me. Without knowing the whole story, she was on my side. Somehow I'd earned this beautiful woman's loyalty. Something I valued and wouldn't take for granted.
I also wanted to laugh. She looked so damn embarrassed by her outburst. No questioning it - she really hadn't meant to say it out loud. Her cheeks turned an adorable shade of red, her eyes wide and apologetic.
"Liam, I am so sorry. That was so rude. I shouldn't-"
I held up my hand to stop her. "Don't apologize. He is a prick."
Grabbing her hand in mine, I pulled her from the elevator and down the hall. Begrudgingly, I dropped her hand to retrieve my keys from my pocket. Once inside, I motioned for her to follow me to the kitchen. She took a seat on a bar stool while I gathered plates and flatware for our meal.
"Do you want to eat here or at the table?" I asked her, gesturing towards the dining area behind her.
She turned briefly to look at the table before turning back. "Here is fine. I've never been too big on formal. Our family, as you've seen, is more of a TV tray type of people unless we have a bunch of company."
I chuckled while pulling the food from the containers and piling it onto the plates.
"Your family is the best," I said as I popped the plates into the microwave for a quick reheat. "What kind of wine would you like?"
Her eyes darted to the small, built-in wine fridge on the bottom half of my cabinets.
"Do you have any beer?" She asked shyly, like she expected me to judge her for not wanting something fancier. I couldn't hold back my smile.
"Of course."
Pulling two Coronas from the fridge, I popped the tops before handing her hers. We took a pull of our cold beers at the same time, our eyes never straying from each other. The moment was intense, yet not uncomfortable. The microwave beeping interrupted the silence stretching between us.
"Why are you doing this?" Clara asked after a few minutes of eating in silence.
"Doing what?"
In my periphery I saw her sit her fork down on her plate. I kept eating, pretending not to notice how nervous she'd suddenly become.
"Being so nice all of a sudden? Coming to my rescue instead of setting out to ruin the date yourself? This side of you is really confusing."
I sighed. I'd been dreading this question. I wasn't entirely sure yet how I wanted to answer. If I came right out and told her I wanted something more, she likely wouldn't believe me. We'd been picking on each other for too long, and she might assume I was joking.
I also didn't want to mislead her, though. When I finally made my intentions clear, I didn't want her to feel as though I'd been lying to her. I'd asked CJ to keep our conversation just between us until I figured out my next move. I stayed out of touch the past few days, trying to clear my head and decide my approach. That backfired. I hadn't even known Clara had a date tonight. If I had, I would have shown up without Blake having to call me. That prick never would have had the chance to bail on Clara, because I would have scared him off before he even got his water.
When I saw her sitting at the bar, talking to that asshat and his date, I knew immediately something was up. I didn't realize who he was until he introduced himself, but CJ had filled me in. Not with all the details, but enough to know Clara had trouble trusting men because her relationship with her ex ended badly.
Didn't even need to know that much to figure out the guy was a douche. It was clear the second I slipped my arm around Clara's waist. He didn't want her to be happy. That much he made clear with the murderous glare he kept aiming my way. He didn't want to be with her, but he didn't want anyone else to have her either. Clara. The kindest, most loving person on the planet. Who in the hell could possibly wish her anything but happiness?
An asshole, that's who.
No way was I going to let her go home where she could replay the night's events. No doubt she would find a way to blame herself. I couldn't let that happen. But bringing her back to my place, giving her the opportunity to ask me a question I wasn't ready to answer, had never been part of the plan.
"Is it so wrong to want us to get along? Neither of us are going anywhere, and I think it would be a lot less stressful for our mutual friends if you and I didn't fight every chance we got."
The twisted lips and sardonic eyebrow told me she wasn't buying my bullshit answer.
My only course of action - deflection.
"How did you manage to go on a date with no one knowing this time?"
She sighed, her shoulders slumping.
"I thought if I could make it through one date without you ruining it then maybe I'd make a connection with someone. My desire to find someone is bordering on the pathetic. Even I'm starting to think it might be a lost cause."
"Why are you trying so hard? You're beautiful and smart and funny. Why not let love find you?"
She laughed dejectedly. "If only it were that easy."
"I mean, I'm not exactly an expert in this area."
"And I didn't exactly ask for your opinion," she added, but the hint of a teasing smile playing on her lips let me know I hadn't overstepped any boundaries. Yet.
"But you're still so young. Is putting yourself through all of this necessary?"
"I'm going to need more alcohol to answer these kinds of questions," she said, wiggling her now empty beer bottle in the air.
Since I'd finished mine as well, I grabbed two more bottles and gestured for her to follow me to the living room so we could sit somewhere more comfortable.
"So spill," I urged after she downed half her beer in one drink.
"I don't know. I've just always loved love. Growing up with parents who were blissfully happy played a big part in that. I wanted that happiness, the joy that came from unconditional love.
"My childhood hadn't been easy, but it was mostly my fault. I came on too strong, scared people off easily. I wanted closeness with everyone who gave me the tiniest indication of friendship. You have no idea how many people have told me over the years that I was just too intense."
She paused to take another drink.
"Other people would learn from their mistakes and adjust, but I just couldn't. I loved hard and easily. It got my heart broken more times than I can count, but that never deterred me. I understood heart break was necessary and trusted all my efforts would pay off someday. Except 'someday' is now and relationships are harder than ever."
Ahh. Just that little bit of insight made everything so much clearer.
Clara, with her endless amounts of confidence and abundance o
f love, just wanted someone to appreciate her for who she was. It wasn't about needing a man to make her feel complete or wanting someone to take care of her. She just wanted someone to love who would love her in return.
"Can I ask you something?" I asked after digesting her insanely personal confession. She nodded after finishing off her beer and without asking I got up to get her another.
"I've seen how you are with everyone else. So outgoing and friendly. Always smiling and going out of your way to help people, even strangers."
Rejoining her on the couch, she took her new beer wordlessly and waited for me to get to the point without getting impatient.
"Why were you so different with me? I know we didn't exactly get off on the best foot, but I've never seen you get angry at anyone else. What is it about me that makes you hate?"
I knew she didn't hate me. I was fishing. But I really wanted to know why she behaved so differently with me.
A pretty blush stained the apple of her cheeks and she looked away.
"This is embarrassing," she muttered.
Closing the distance between us, I scooted until our thighs touched. Cupping her cheek with my hand, I forced her to turn her eyes to mine.
"I know I gave you a hard time in the past, but you're safe with me. I won't tease you about things that might upset you. You can be honest with me."
We were so close our noses were almost touching. Her eyes searched mine for so long I started to worry she was panicking. But then she licked her lips while staring at mine. I wanted to kiss her so damn bad, but it wasn't the time. So with every damn bit of willpower I possessed, I pulled away and dropped my hand. Disappointment flashed across her face. Not able to keep from touching her in some way, I took her hand in mine. She stared at our connected hands for a long time before speaking again.
"I was really, really attracted to you."
For a second I forgot what I'd even asked her.
Confused, I squeezed her hand. "Why would that make you act differently?"
She sighed and sat back. I worried she'd pull her hand from mine but to my relief, she didn't.
"You are exactly the kind of guy I shouldn't want. I'd heard about you. A lady’s man who didn't do relationships. Even if you did, you work for my brother. Being attracted to you was just asking for a disaster. Considering how strong I usually come on when I'm interested in someone, I chose to go the opposite direction. I figured it would be easier if you hated me. No temptation to do something stupid."
