He’d given her the perfect opening, and his honesty made her realize that he deserved the same from her. She stepped back, looked up into his eyes. “There is one thing you should know,” she said.
“I’m listening.”
“Okay.” She let a couple of moments pass while she gathered the thoughts she had rehearsed for this moment. “My divorce is fairly recent. In fact, Mark and I only split up a bit over two months ago.” She studied Reed’s face for any sign of shock or disappointment. Finding none, she continued. “That explains why I’ve only been in Bufflehead Creek such a short time. When the divorce was final, I took the money I settled upon and immediately bought Cottontail Farm.”
He nodded his head in quiet contemplation. “I see.”
“Are you disappointed to hear that?” she asked.
“No. I am a bit surprised that this move was such a sudden one. You made a few major decisions at a stressful time in your life.”
“I know it seems that way, but the decision to leave Mark was not sudden. We hadn’t had a real marriage in years. Without a firm purpose in mind, I stalked Realtor.com on the internet, looking for properties in the southern part of the state. For a long time it had been my dream to get away from Charleston and settle quietly with Esther on my own piece of tranquility.”
He smiled, a slight upturn of his lips. “And no regrets?”
“None. I didn’t question my decision, and I’ve never been sorry. The four walls I inhabited with Mark, as lavish as they were, never felt like home. With one step into that little clapboard farmhouse where I live now, I knew I’d arrived where I’d always wanted to be.”
She took hold of the lapels of his jacket and ran her hands down the fine material. “I hope I haven’t shocked you. It must be difficult to accept that my marriage ended so recently. But I felt you should know how and why I ended up at Cottontail Farm, the place where I plan to be for many years.”
“I’ve never been fixated on dates, Cam. Two months...two years. Doesn’t really matter. What does matter is that we’ve found each other now and what we’ve found is worth exploring. I hope you agree.”
She wondered if he could read the sincerity, the promise in her eyes. “Reed, haven’t I shown you that I agree one hundred percent?” Rising up on her toes, she kissed him lightly. “If I haven’t, then I’m doing this all wrong, and I promise to do better.”
His arms came around her, enveloping her in warmth. The kiss he returned was exactly what she needed. “Let’s go home,” he said, his voice husky. “Because you are doing everything right.”
* * *
OH, MY. In the car heading back to Bufflehead Creek, Camryn’s anticipation grew. What was Reed expecting would happen when they got back to her place? She would ask him in. She wanted to and it was the polite thing to do, and besides, she didn’t want the evening to end so soon. But if he thought... No, she wasn’t ready for anything more than a few of those spectacular kisses.
She could offer him a cup of coffee or a lemonade. Those were the only choices she had in her house besides one lone bottle of whiskey in the cabinet above the fridge. Camryn had brought it all the way from Charleston thinking that if she became too anxious some night, she could take a few sips. She never had.
She would offer him the whiskey. She would turn on some music softly in the background while they talked. Maybe they would snuggle a bit under the afghan her Grandma Esther had given her on her fifteenth birthday. And they would kiss. My, yes, they would kiss. He would stay a while. They would get closer. Perhaps because she’d told him how recent her divorce was, Reed would understand her reluctance for anything more than kisses right now. He had taken the news quite well.
Reed turned on the car radio to an easy listening station. Once she had planned the rest of the evening out, Camryn relaxed into her seat. She felt cozy and safe. Totally stress free. And then she thought of Brooke.
“You have to tell him, Cammie,” Brooke had said. “He’s got to know that you’re pregnant.”
Well, yes, she did. After they’d both opened up to each other tonight, it was the right thing to do. And as Brooke so truthfully pointed out, Reed would know soon enough about her condition anyway. He had taken the news of her divorce practically in stride. Would he react the same way to this news? At least a girl could hope.
Reed turned off a four-lane highway onto the country road that led to Bufflehead Creek. Camryn sat up straight in her seat. “How much farther?”
“About five miles,” he said. He smiled over at her. “I thought for a minute you were going to fall asleep.”
“I think I could have,” she said. “But I’m having such a nice time I don’t want to miss any of it.”
He reached over, patted her hand.
“Reed?”
“Hmm?”
“There is one thing I haven’t told you. And before we go any farther with this relationship, I think I should.”
“Okay. Sounds serious, so don’t keep me guessing.”
“You remember I told you about the two miscarriages I had?”
“Of course.”
“Because of that, Esther is so special to me. For a long time the only situation I could imagine where Esther wouldn’t be my sole and top priority was if I were to have another child.”
The car swerved slightly. Reed righted it immediately. “Whoa, Camryn. The conversation we’ve been having tonight has suddenly taken a sharp turn. I’m not ready to talk about children. I’ve only just confessed my feelings...”
She felt like a fool. Her face flushed hot and tingly. She’d said that all wrong. Of course he thought she was pressuring him about future children.
“No, no. I didn’t mean... I’m not talking about you and I having children. Oh, Reed, you must think I’m being ridiculous... I didn’t mean that at all.” She was babbling and needed to speak in complete, logical sentences soon.
He glanced over at her. She noticed his hands were wrapped tightly around the steering wheel.
“I’m glad to hear that, Cam, because I’m just embarking on a long and difficult path with the two I’ve got. So, what exactly did you mean?” he asked.
“I intended only to tell you that...” Suddenly the words that meant so much to her seemed stuck in her throat. This baby, this second child was all she thought about. But how could she explain the situation so he would understand?
She thought about changing direction, making up a topic completely unrelated to the one she’d started. But she’d already said too much, forgotten everything she’d rehearsed, and her brain just wasn’t working properly. So she took a deep breath, looked at his rigid profile in the low light from the dashboard and said, “I’m pregnant, Reed.”
“What?” His voice had risen an octave.
She knew he’d heard her. Still she said, “Pregnant. Three months. I’m going to have a baby.”
“But...but you’re divorced.” After a pause, he said, “You are divorced, aren’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Then do you know who the father is?”
His question cut like a knife into her heart. “Of course I do! How can you even ask me that?”
“How can you not have told me?” he snapped back.
“Frankly it didn’t seem like it was your business to know,” she said. “But then, tonight—the restaurant, the moonlight, your words to me—I realized you should know.”
“Well, fine. So who is the father? And more importantly, where is the father?”
“The father is my ex-husband,” she said.
“But you told me the marriage hasn’t been good for years.”
“Yes, I did, but there was one time...”
A vein thrummed in Reed’s temple. “Does he know?”
“Yes, he knows. You don’t think I would keep this information from the baby’s father, from the man I wa
s married to?”
“I don’t know, Cam. I don’t know anything right now. I don’t know why you waited to tell me.”
“I was obligated to tell my ex-husband,” she said. “I was never obligated to tell the man who is renting my barn!” She didn’t want to become angry, but a slow burn had begun in her stomach and seemed to be traveling through her bloodstream.
“Wait a minute...” They’d reached Cottontail Farm. Reed pulled into the lane and stopped the car. He swiveled in his seat and gave her a hard stare. “So how do you explain that you hadn’t had a real marriage with Mark for something like three years? Isn’t the act of producing a baby part of a real marriage?”
“Yes, of course. But what I told you is true.”
“Then how did you ever end up...?”
She gathered her thoughts as best she could. Unfortunately her tumbling emotions didn’t allow for logical expression right now. “We went to a marriage counselor, Mark and I. We thought that because of Esther we should try to save our relationship. But there was nothing to save.”
He looked down at her stomach as if some alien monster was about to burst forth and make a mockery of everything she said. “Apparently there was enough to save if you managed to sleep together. And apparently without any thought to pregnancy prevention.”
“The counselor advised us to try and recapture some of the intimacy from our earliest years together,” she explained. “We did try, that one time. We both got carried away...”
“Carried away? You aren’t teenagers, Cam.”
“We didn’t even kiss! But we did, well, make a baby. The night we spent together didn’t mean anything to either of us. We still went ahead with the divorce. I didn’t even know I was pregnant when I signed the papers.”
Several moments passed when Camryn didn’t know whether to run from the car or burst into tears. “Will you please say something?” she finally asked.
“I don’t know what to say,” Reed answered. “I suppose I’m still processing this news. Did you and Mark discuss your options? Did you even think about staying together?”
“In truth, no. I had already accepted the divorce as the logical road to take with our marriage. When I found out I was pregnant, I was happy. I turned my focus into preparing for this baby, into assuring that I would have a successful pregnancy.”
She stared at his profile, wishing he would turn toward her, that she would see that warmth in his eyes she had seen just an hour ago. But he didn’t move. “There is still an element of risk,” she said. “But with each passing day, that risk diminishes. I’m now hopeful that I will carry this baby to term.”
He nodded, a slight, barely discernible movement of his head. “That’s good. I wish you the best.”
He wished her the best? That sounded so final, as if he were saying goodbye and good luck. As if he were telling her that he wouldn’t be a part of this new miracle coming into her life. She reached for the door handle. Fine. It was better that she understood now. She’d known this baby for three wonderful months. She’d only known Reed for a few weeks.
“Wait. I’m coming.” He got out of the car and came around to open the door for her. He offered his hand and she took it. And then they walked, without touching, to her front door.
All her plans for inviting him in suddenly vanished in the smoky haze of her disappointment. “Thank you for dinner,” she said, putting her key in the door lock.
“Do you want me to come in with you...to make sure everything’s okay?”
She stared at him a moment. What did that even mean? Everything was miles away from being okay. Besides, why wouldn’t everything in her cozy home be okay? Because he wasn’t part of it? She shook her head. “Rooster’s inside. Don’t you hear him whining?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“He would be barking if anything was wrong.”
“Okay.” He paused a moment. “I’ll be in touch in the next couple of days.” He turned, started to walk away, but stopped and looked back at her once more. “Oh, and Cam, take care of yourself.”
The first tear gathered in her eye. “I’m sorry you’re disappointed, Reed.”
He shook his head. “I don’t know what I am. I just know that this was a shock, one I can’t deal with right now.”
Not trusting herself to speak, she simply nodded her understanding.
“If you need anything...” He never finished the sentence.
“I won’t.” She stepped inside. “Good night Reed.”
She went into her house, crouched down on the floor to ruffle the fur behind Rooster’s ears. The night hadn’t turned out as she had planned, and she would have two more days to think about what this all meant before Esther came home. She didn’t want to cry, but her eyes welled with tears.
After all, what had she expected? That a man she’d so recently met, a man who was trying to start his life over, a man who had problems of his own, would suddenly rise up at her announcement and declare, “Wow, that’s great!” Even if her relationship with Reed wasn’t so new, those expectations would have been unrealistic.
“Don’t let foolish dreams cloud the reality of your life, Camryn,” she said out loud. “You did not leave Charleston and move to this farm to find a man. No, you left to discover an absence of stress and a healthy environment for your two children.” And she had. Because of Esther and this baby, she had so much to be thankful for.
So she rubbed her eyes dry and patted her tummy. “It will all be okay, little one. Just keep getting ready to come into the world. I can’t wait for you to get here.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
REED’S PARENTS DIDN’T expect him home until quite late. He hadn’t expected to be home until late, as well. The clock in his SUV read 10:30. The boys would have turned in, and perhaps his folks would already be asleep in his bed. Reed didn’t feel like hurrying home to stretch out on the couch. So he drove past his house and kept going.
For an hour he twisted around country roads, stopping occasionally to view some sample of South Carolina wildlife, a bird, or small creature darting across the road to forage in the bushes on this dark night. He’d gone over his conversation with Camryn several times. He couldn’t bring himself to regret the words he’d spoken, though he knew he had upset her. She had shocked the heck out of him. How did she think he would react?
But he did regret the way the evening had ended. He’d so hoped... He’d been thinking about this night for so long, imagining what it would be like to sit next to Camryn on her sofa and talk about the near future, a future that he’d begun to think of sharing with her as more than friends. He’d allowed himself to think that Camryn Montgomery could be the one to make him forget the bruises of his last marriage, the one to make him believe in a life of calm contentment, the one who would warm his bed each night.
He supposed he’d blown that image all to heck now. But how was a guy who didn’t have too many skills at fathering supposed to react to hearing another baby was on the way? If his relationship with Camryn was to lead to a trip down the aisle, how was that guy supposed to share in the responsibilities of another person’s child, especially when that person was Camryn, the most uptight mom he’d ever met?
No, he’d said what his instincts urged him to say, what his sense of self-preservation dictated, and he’d protected the life he’d established for him and his sons. He pulled into his drive and drove to the darkened house.
He walked slowly up his porch steps and went into the living room. His mom had left a light on by the couch where she’d arranged a blanket and pillow. Nice, but he probably wouldn’t sleep much. Tonight with Camryn, he’d been hoping for so much more and now, as he looked back, he wasn’t at all certain he wasn’t the one who blew it. He had spoken harshly, perhaps, but he’d spoken the truth.
Early the next morning, after his parents opted for the peace and quiet of their motor home,
Reed put his sons in his car and drove to the barn. Before letting the boys out of the back seat, he turned around and issued a strong warning. “You guys stay in the barn, got it? Don’t come out unless the building is on fire.”
“What are we supposed to do in there?” Phillip asked.
“I’ve got that all figured out.” Reed smiled. “Each of you take a Curry Brush from the trunk and give Saucy a really good cleaning.”
Phillip, with the disdain of an eleven-year-old, scowled. Justin popped up and down in his seat. “I like doing that! And Saucy likes me best.”
“Whatever, just do it.” Reed brought Brute from his stall and threw a saddle on his back. He needed a short gallop to clear his head. He’d just fastened the cinch when he saw Camryn out of the corner of his eye. She came out of the small gardening shed behind her house with a bucket in each hand. Reed looped Brute’s reins over a fence post and marched toward her. Might as well break the ice with a good deed.
He stopped a few feet from her. “What are you doing with those?”
“Good morning to you, too,” she said, her facial features registering only a bland indifference.
He took both buckets. “Give me those. You shouldn’t be carrying heavy loads.”
She let him carry the chicken feed to the grazing lot. “Where were you yesterday? I’ve been carrying these buckets for weeks.”
“Yesterday I didn’t know you were...” He stopped, frowned.
“Pregnant?” she said.
He kept quiet, not wanting to bring up the subject again.
Once they reached the grassy area where several dozen chickens waited impatiently, she began throwing handfuls of the grain onto the ground.
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