by G. K. DeRosa
Ugh, locked in a room with werewolf Barbie? Kill me now.
“Hurry back,” I called as he darted out.
Vessa stabbed at some lettuce, dragging it around her plate. After a few beats of silence, she glanced up at me. “Vander told me about your memory loss.”
“Umhmm,” I mumbled around another bite.
“Is it getting any better?”
“Yup. I’m starting to remember things, but they come in bits and flashes. Sometimes I feel like I’m playing connect the dots.”
“Must be annoying.”
Annoying? A toothache was annoying. This was hell. I shoved down the thoughts along with another mouthful of meatballs.
“Well, I know Vander was really worried about you when you were gone.” Her amber eyes met mine. “Talon too, but I did my best to keep him happy.”
A burst of jealousy flared in my chest. I ground my teeth together to keep from saying something nasty. Despite our complicated past, Talon and I weren’t together. From what I’d gathered from the other guys, we never really were. Still, I could barely restrain the urge to punch her.
“Talon’s so protective,” she continued. “He always gets too involved in the lives of his marks. It’s sweet, but it doesn’t last. Once his mission is over, he moves on.”
Anger swirled through my insides, entangling with the jealousy and a snarl built up in my throat. Talon is mine. My demon’s voice echoed through my mind, her words ping-ponging across my skull.
“I’m pretty sure I’m more than just his mark,” I spat out.
Her lips puckered. “Doubtful.”
Flashes of Talon and me skirted across my vision. They were the hardest to hold onto. I couldn’t remember details but the feelings they incited were too powerful to ignore. “He loves me,” I blurted.
Vessa’s light brows slammed together. “You’re wrong. He’s only obsessed with you. I’m his true love, and I always will be. He always comes back to me. Like he did for weeks while you were missing.”
Rage tore through my veins, heating my blood to boiling. Black blanketed my vision and before I could stop her, my demon took over.
Hungry. The inane shifter chattered on about my man. He’d been sworn to protect me after all, not this silly girl. The hunger clawed at my throat, but more than that, anger at the she-wolf’s words spurred me on. I leaned closer, and my jaw unlocked.
Vessa’s eyes widened as I neared, a swirl of blue vapor spilling from my lips. “Wh-what are you doing?”
I clasped the back of her neck and wrenched her face to mine. She opened her mouth to scream, but I clapped my hand over it. Locking my eyes to hers, I could feel the black eclipsing my vision as I caught her in my mesmerizing gaze. Gotcha.
Tendrils of dark energy poured out of me. Finally. The heady rush of power made my head spin. I dug my fingernails into her scalp, holding her firmly in place as the fine mist invaded her body. I breathed her in, the scent of wildflowers and patchouli mouthwatering.
Inhaling deeper, I drew her essence forth, a pale amber vapor escaping her slack jaw. Her light filled the darkness inside, and a wave of giddiness swam over me. I giggled as her head lolled back. Her power was average at best, not the strength I imagined her wolf brother would contain, but I couldn’t have him yet. I’d keep him around to satisfy other urges. I sucked in another breath and dazzling energy surged through my veins. Vessa may have been weak but she was better than nothing.
A sharp crash jerked my attention from my meal, and my head spun toward the entrance. The dragon shifter barreled through the locked door, the flames of hell burning through his irises. “Azara, no!”
Dammit, he always ruined my fun.
I dropped the blonde, her petite form curling into a ball on the rug. “She’s still alive,” I muttered as Talon slid to the floor beside her. He didn’t even spare me a passing glare.
“Thank the gods.” He pulled her into his arms, and a twinge of unexpected envy twisted my insides. After he called for the healer, I watched as he set her down on the couch with surprising gentleness for such a burly dragon. “You’re going to be all right, Vessa. Just rest,” he whispered.
Talon did care for her. The mindless she-wolf wasn’t lying about that. Another pang of jealousy assaulted me, squeezing my lungs. “It’s true then, you have been with her.”
He whirled at me, deep lines furrowing his brow. “What are you talking about?”
“The wolf said you’d been together in my absence.”
“I’m not talking to you about this,” he snarled. “Bring Azara back.”
I clucked my teeth, shaking my head. “I am Azara. You’re mistaken to believe that we’re two individuals. I am simply her demon half. If you love her, as you say you do, you must love all of her.”
“How can I when you do something like this?” He stared down at the unconscious shifter, anger darkening his features.
“Accept me or don’t. It’s up to you, dragon.”
Talon leapt to his feet, surprising me and I staggered back. His broad shoulders and barrel chest loomed over me, his searing irises boring holes into my head. I’d never admit he intimidated me, of course. I threw my own shoulders back and met his piercing gaze. “Azara’s strong. Stronger than you think, and if she wanted to, she could banish you to the darkest corners of her mind. So I think you are the one that needs to make a decision. Play nice or not at all.” His hands cupped my cheeks, and he locked his eyes to mine. The silver smolder tore into me, leaving me bare and exposed. I wrapped my arms around my middle as the darkness receded. “Bring her back,” he hissed.
My humanity flickered back on, and a rush of emotions pummeled my insides. I squeezed my eyes shut and fought against the brewing storm. I didn’t want to come back and face what I’d done.
“Azara, Azara, come back.”
That voice like warm honey drew me back from the dark recesses of my mind. It was no use fighting it, my body reacted to that smooth timbre like tides to the moon. I was hopeless against its pull.
I blinked and hot tears filled my eyes as they focused on the disappointed face a few inches from mine. Talon’s warm breath swirled with mine as I choked back a sob. Over his shoulder I could make out Vessa’s motionless form on the couch.
I remembered this time. I was aware of every second my demon had the reins. “I’m so sorry,” I blubbered, the weight of his gaze too heavy.
He slowly shook his head and pulled me into his chest. I buried my nose into his shirt and his comforting scent filled my senses. “Gods, Azara, what am I going to do with you?”
“Just lock me up and throw away the key. I can’t do this anymore. Just when I think I’m getting better, I lose it. My demon’s too strong.” I smothered another building sob in the soft fabric of his undershirt.
He pushed me out to arm’s length and captured my chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Don’t say that, Azara. Never stop fighting, do you hear me?”
I shook my head and lowered my gaze. “I’m starting to remember things and I—I don’t think I’ll be able to live with what Thax and Remy made me do.”
“Yes, you will. I’ll help you; I promise.”
I lifted my gaze to meet his, and a raging tempest of emotions crashed over me. “Why? Why do you keep giving me more chances than I deserve? I’ve been awful to you.”
His lips pressed to form a thin line. “Because despite everything, I can’t stop loving you,” he finally gritted out.
Steel bands closed around my lungs, and I sucked in a ragged breath. I didn’t deserve him. I opened my mouth to say just that, to warn him away from me for all the reasons I was wrong for him, but the door swung open and my jaw snapped shut.
Fiona rushed in with Logan at her side. “What happened?” The warden’s anxious gaze bounced from Talon to me and back.
Talon ticked his head at Vessa, still motionless, stretched across the sofa. “Next time I ask you to watch Azara, you might want to listen.”
Logan paled as his
eyes raked over the blonde. “I only left a few minutes ago, and they were fine.”
My dragon protector straightened, releasing me. A chill settled over my body the moment his was gone, every nerve protesting his absence. If remembering my time with Thax meant uncovering my past with Talon, I resolved to endure it.
Every fiber in my being screamed at me that it would be worth it.
“I’m taking over Azara’s recovery,” Talon announced, “And I’ll be with her twenty-four-seven. I won’t let this happen again.” He turned to Fiona who was tending to Vessa. “I want her admitted to psych immediately. Tell Dr. Ollie to make up a private room.”
I groaned internally. Talon I could handle, but a psychologist?
“Sure thing.” Fiona gave me a reassuring smile. “He’ll have her as good as new in no time.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Dr. Ollie pushed up his glasses and eyed me over his notepad. He was young, with light auburn hair and matching eyebrows. “You’ve certainly had quite an interesting few months, Azara.”
I grunted. “Yeah, you could say that.” Once I’d been admitted, I’d spent a few hours telling the good doctor my life story. Most of it was based on what others had told me, but some I actually remembered. GG’s potion was working wonders, which meant a mix of emotions knotted my insides.
I’d done terrible things under Thax’s control. New tormented faces starred in my nightmares just as I’d begun to deal with the ones from my bender at the Fae club.
“What else do you remember?” he asked, jotting something down.
I recounted the bits and pieces that flew through my mind on any given day. The memories about Talon were the hardest to unravel. My cousin specifically wanted him obliterated from my mind, and I still didn’t understand why.
“I’m sure you’ll do well here, Azara. I’ve helped many an inmate keep their dark urges under control. You need only to want help.”
I nodded, twirling the magic-siphoning cuff around my wrist. “I do.” I didn’t want her to control me anymore. I didn’t want to hurt people. But I couldn’t help the tiny swirl of satisfaction at the look on Vessa’s face as I drained her. A smile curled my lips, unbidden.
“Good. Then we’ll get straight to work.” He scribbled something else on his notepad. “In addition to your sessions with me, you’ll complete physical training with Talon. Healing the mind and the body is essential in these sorts of situations.”
“Okay.” I scanned his office, and my eyes landed on a diploma from a university I recognized. “You went to medical school in the human world?”
He dipped his head and adjusted his glasses. “I am mostly human, Azara. My great grandmother was a witch, but unfortunately I didn’t inherit any of her powers.”
“Maybe not unfortunately,” I mumbled. Having supernatural abilities wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.
He clucked his tongue. “By the time you leave here, I think you’ll feel differently.” He placed his notepad on the desk and regarded me with gentle eyes. “Do you have any questions for me?”
“Yes. Why wasn’t I brought to you when I first arrived?” I’d been back at Darkblood for weeks, struggling with my demon. Why the hold up on letting the doc work his psychological magic?
“Do you remember what I said about wanting help?”
I slowly nodded.
“Do you think your answer would’ve been the same a few weeks ago?”
“Probably not.” When I’d first arrived, I was too lost. I didn’t care about anyone or anything—not really anyway.
“And that’s why you’re here now.”
I wrapped the towel more tightly around my chest, tucking it under my armpits and hazarded a quick glance in the mirror. For the first time in a while, I recognized my reflection as my own. The darkness the demon brought was receding. Or maybe it was the magic of a hot shower. Running my hand through my wet hair, I inhaled the clean scent. It wasn’t the expensive shampoo I used back at home, but it was ten times better than the crap they gave us on the other side of the fortress. Maybe psych wouldn’t be so bad.
I stepped into my room, and a pair of silver irises fixed on me. Their intensity seared over my body from head to toe. I squirmed, adjusting my towel once again.
“Sorry,” Talon muttered, lowering his fiery gaze. Dr. Ollie said you were done so I wanted to check in on you.
The good doctor had barely won the argument over whether Talon could attend my sessions. My bodyguard had been adamant about spending every moment with me despite Dr. Ollie’s assurances I’d be safe here. I was currently only one of two residents in the entire ward.
Still, Talon had remained outside his office for the length of my session. I was surprised I hadn’t found him there when the doctor escorted me to my room.
“No, it’s fine,” I finally answered as I headed to my closet.
“Do you want me to--?” He hitched his thumb over his shoulder at the door.
“Nope, I’ll just be a minute.” After sharing a cell with two guys, having the luxury of a private room was too odd to consider. He averted his gaze, and I tugged a tank top over my head and slid into a pair of yoga pants. One of the perks of the psych ward were that jumpsuits weren’t required. “I wanted to ask you something,” I said over my shoulder.
In the spirit of good mental health, I’d decided to ask Talon about Vessa and what had gone on during my absence. The dark voice inside my head wanted to hate him for whatever it was, but I resolved to give him the chance to explain. That was the healthy thing to do, right?
Now clean, and in my comfy new clothes, I steeled my nerves and walked over to the bed. Talon sat in front of me, his large frame dwarfing the small chair.
“What’s up?”
I folded onto the soft mattress and curled my fingers around the sheets. “I remember attacking Vessa. I—I didn’t completely black out this time.”
He exhaled a breath. “Well, that’s good, I think.”
I also remembered what my demon had said to him, about us being one in the same, but I wasn’t ready to have that discussion yet. Would he still love the real me? I buried the plaguing thought for now and focused on the other burning question. “I also remember why I attacked her. I mean, besides the being hungry part.”
He nodded, his reassuring gaze urging me to proceed.
“Vessa said something about you and her.”
His eyes widened, a flicker of tension tightening the set of his broad shoulders. “And what was that?”
“She said you were together while I was gone and reminded me I was nothing more than your mark. That you’d forget about me as soon as your assignment was over.”
His jaw clenched, that taut tendon fluttering like mad. He shook his head and kept his eyes low. “That’s why you attacked her?” he finally muttered.
And I hate her. “Mostly, yes.” I searched his eyes which finally reached mine. He still hadn’t confirmed or denied it and the longer the silence stretched, the more twisted my insides became. “Talon?”
He jabbed his fingers through his hair and muttered a curse. “Of course I wasn’t with her while you were gone. Gods, Azara, I spent every second of every day scouring the Underworld for you and when I wasn’t on the field, I was scanning hours of never-ending video footage. Vessa did come to visit once, and she sat through a few hours of surveillance with me. She may have tried to rekindle something”—he waved a nonchalant hand—"but I made it clear I wasn’t interested.”
I released the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding, and my fingers unclenched, freeing the sheets. “So she didn’t make you happy while I was missing?”
“Azara, nothing could’ve made me happy while you were missing.”
My feet took off of their own accord, leaping toward him. My arms wrapped around his shoulders, and I buried my face in the crook of his neck. His musky, mountain-fresh scent enveloped me in its comforting embrace. His arms eventually came around me too, hesitantly at first, before
his body molded around mine.
We stayed like that for a long time, hours, or maybe even days. I let his warmth chase away the darkness that had consumed me over the past few months.
By the following night, I felt more like myself than I had in forever. Maybe it was the magic-siphoning cuffs keeping my demon at bay or maybe a combination of Dr. Ollie’s soothing voice and GG’s memory-restoring potion.
I glanced over the top of the self-help book I was reading, and my lips split into a smile. Talon, my ever-present shadow, had fallen asleep. His head leaned against the wall, a peaceful grin carved into his sculpted jaw. He hadn’t been exaggerating when he’d said he would be taking over my protection detail twenty-four seven. He hadn’t left my side since the Vessa incident except of course when I had my daily session with Dr. Ollie.
Talon’s calming presence soothed my soul. Which was weird considering how intimidating he could be and how exasperating I sometimes found him. Most of the staff in the psych ward were scared of him. As my eyes moved down the tight tee stretched across his ripped torso, I couldn’t blame them. He was as terrifying as he was beautiful.
“Stop staring,” he muttered and rubbed his eyes, squirming in the hard plastic chair.
“Sorry.” I pulled the book up over my face and pretended to read.
He let out a yawn and stretched his arms over his head. I could see his hands over the edge of the book as they reached for the ceiling.
“You know, you could sleep on an actual bed. I’m sure the psych ward guards could at least take over while I’m snoozing at night.”
“And miss your snoring? I don’t think so.”
I dropped the book and stared at him horrified. “I do not snore.”
His lips curled into a grin, revealing that elusive dimple. “That’s what all girls say.”
A twinge of jealousy lit up my insides. “And exactly how many girls have you watched sleep?”
“Just one.” He paused and raised a mischievous brow. “However, I’ve slept next to quite a few.”
