Rats! Was that all she was going to say? That I would know soon enough? Why wouldn’t she just tell me now? A deep roar surged through me as I dwelled on the thoughts in my head.
I changed the subject and began to tell Grandma about the ogre in the mountains I wanted to help. “Anna, he doesn’t belong here, either,” she said. “He doesn’t? Well, then where does he belong?” I asked. It started to seem that my predictions were becoming correct; all the creatures here were actually people.
“Strange…” I said, under my breath. “What was that, child?” Grandma Mesha had heard me. “Huh? Oh, nothing,” I said in a bit of a shock. I thought I had been discreet with my thoughts.
Grandma and I strolled through the meadow side by side as she proceeded to tell me about my heritage. I was beginning to understand why Queen Chelynna was the way she was. Grandma Mesha said she hadn’t had such a great childhood.
Grandma and I were still talking, so I began to tell her my stories about my mother. She started to cry, and her head dropped down in torment from all she was hearing. She looked as if she were becoming angry. But I took her hand and told her it wasn’t Queen Chelynna’s fault based on how she had been raised. She squeezed my hand as she wept and said, “Anna, my girl, that is so not true. We all have a choice to make.”
“We make a wrong choice or a right choice. Your mother chose to act exactly like her mother and made the wrong choice!” Grandma sounded sad and her tone boiled. I leaned in close, wrapping each one of my arms around her and said, “I’m ok, Grandma. See? I’m here with you!” She looked me up and down as she dried her tears with her shirt.
“You will never experience anything like that ever again!” she said with a commanding voice. And in that moment, I felt loved. Not even Queen Chelynna could take this from me.
CHAPTER 18
We arrived at the mountain. I noticed grandma had a suspicious look on her face as we began to hike up to the waterfall. “We’re getting close, Grandma, I can smell it.” “You can smell it?” she asked. “You can’t?” I asked back. “Oh! That horrible smell,” she said while using her fingers to clamp her nose. She turned her glance toward me and let out a chuckle, seeing that I was plugging my nose also. We both had to breathe out of our mouths and our eyes started to water from the sting of the odor.
I looked at grandma and said, “This is odd. When Tay and I came up here, it didn’t smell this bad.” She looked a little puzzled and concerned that I had been here before. “So, you have already been up here?” she asked, while tapping a finger on her lip.
“Yes, Grandma. That is why I wanted to come up here with you; we can change it and see who it is.” “Annalise, not just anyone is changed into something so bad for no reason. I think it best that we leave this one alone.” She snatched my hand quickly and pulled me away from the entrance to the ogre’s cave.
“What are you doing, Grandma? We have to help it!” I shouted. With her strong hold on me, she said, “Not this one, Annalise. Not this one!” Even though I had just met her, there seemed to be a sense of knowing to not talk back and to just go with her.
Hand in hand, we rushed down the mountain. We leapt off onto solid ground. The moment our feet touched the grass, we heard a furious roar from the top of the mountain. “Hurry, Anna, quickly!” Grandma yanked me so fast that my feet could not keep up. I started to trip over my own steps, so Grandma took my wand and made a vine wall that hid us from sight.
“Ok child, you can catch your breath.” I pretty much figured she was talking to herself since she had been the one doing all the running and all I had been doing was tripping and falling.
“Grandma Mesha…” I said with a feeling she would not want to answer my question, but my curiosity was overwhelming. I took a giant inhale, then exhaled… “Grandma Mesha, who is the ogre? I know you know, otherwise there would be no reason for us to run like that.”
She looked down at me, brushed her fingers through my hair and said, “I believe that is the king’s brother. Your mother exiled him here for doing unspeakable things.” My eyes filled up with so much water as I saw my grandma become heartbroken about the torment of her own son.
Unspeakable? What could be more unspeakable than what Queen Chelynna had done to me? “Grandma, what does that mean?” I asked, still deep in thought and lost in my own memories. She answered, “No, Annalise. It’s called unspeakable for a reason.”
I knew she was torn up about it, so I let all the questions in my head drift away. I didn’t want to upset her any more than she already was.
Silently, we headed back across the meadow with the large vine still shielding us. Neither of us spoke a peep. Both of us were deep in our own thoughts. Grandma was probably thinking about my uncle, and I was still wondering what he did that was so bad mother turned him into an ogre.
It dawned on me why there was so much secrecy in my family. No one wanted to own up to their mistakes and release their guilt. Instead, they wanted to run and hide from their mistakes. I guess they thought it was ok to never speak of them again.
Still, I wanted to help everyone who had been changed here. And if Grandmother wasn’t going to help me, then I guessed it was time to call on Tay to learn all she could teach me.
Grandma Mesha wasn’t too happy with my impatient decision. She spoke with concern about it. “Annalise, this could lead you far away from what your heart truly desires. Are you sure this is what you want? You could end up fighting for, or helping something, that could lead you down a really dark path.” It was funny. I could hear her distress and could see the gloom on her face, but not knowing the full puzzle began to lead me astray from Grandma’s warning.
I walked up to her and gave her a tight embrace, trying not to pay too much attention to the water droplets wetting my hair. “Grandma Mesha, please don’t cry,” I said as I drew her even closer to me. “I know you want me to be safe and protected, but I need to find this out on my own. If that means stepping on a few cracks in the floor to get there, then that’s what I’ll do.”
It was weird. It was as if Grandma knew something important but wouldn’t share it with me. My palms were starting to moisten while I was in deep thought about what Tay was going to make me do, or rather, what I was going to have to make myself do.
After all the embracing and crying with Grandma Mesha, I decided to bid her farewell for now. “Grandma Mesha, I bet you miss home terribly.” She nodded her head slowly. When I saw another frown starting to form up on her face, I quickly added, “I can send you back, Grandma. I know how.”
A shocked look came across her face as she shouted, “How do you know this child?!” “Tailya taught me,” I said, as I hung my head down shamefully. I had thought she would be excited for me, but she seemed more enraged and frightened than anything else. There was no reasoning with her now. She wouldn’t pay attention to anything coming out of my mouth.
“It’s ok Grandma. I see loud and clear that you do not want me to tamper with any of this, so I won’t. Ok?” A sight of satisfaction appeared upon her smiling face. She seemed pleased. Trying to change the subject, I asked, “Grandma, what was my king like when he was my age?”
“Well, Annalise,” she said as a huge chuckle burst out, “Let me just say he was no picnic.” She giggled deeply and let out a giant breath of air. “He wasn’t?” I asked in a suspicious manner.
Grandma Mesha closed her eyes to think back on some memories to share with me. I suddenly thought, “This is my chance!” I immediately grabbed for my wand. Swirling my hand around and flicking my wrist toward my grandma, I shouted “Spiti!” I did exactly what she hadn’t wanted me to do. I used magic to send her home.
A giant lump of regret dredged up inside of me as I got lost in thought of what she was going through right now. How much pain and heartache had I just caused her? A strong down pour raced from my eyes faster than I could swipe it away. I had lied to my grandma, someone who loved me deeper than words could express.
I started to feel d
eeply ill once more, and I knew that feeling all too well. It was another piece of my heart dropping to the floor like a dying rose petal falling off its stem. Oh, what had I done? I dropped to my knees and wept.
I opened my eyes to two bright suns. I rubbed my eyes, realizing I must have cried myself to sleep. I started to think about my actions again and felt deceitful. Still, it was time to do what I seemed to be good at… Time to push my regret deep down inside.
I was beginning to understand why people hid their feelings. I headed off to find Tay and Starbeam.
CHAPTER 19
Great. I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere. I stomped my feet and wondered where I should go. I saw a bright like shining down from the sky. Yes! I would follow the rays of the suns. Surely, they would lead me back to Starbeam and Tailya.
Picking up my feet swiftly, I raced to my destination. For a moment, I let my mind wander and BAM! I smashed straight into a giant green bush. My eyes slammed shut the moment I hit it. There was something odd yet inviting about the bush.
This bush was not like the others. It was soft and inviting, like when your head hits the pillow for bed. Opening my eyes, I realized I wasn’t hurt. In fact, there was not one scratch on me. Strange. I slowly reached out to touch the leaves in front of me. They were so soft that it started to puzzle me. I stood up and noticed I was actually inside the bush and couldn’t see which direction I had come from.
I began looking side to side and up and down for an opening. Something to jump out at me and say, “This way!” But, nothing did. It looked as though I was on my own. I would just have to decide on a direction to go. With a hint of hesitation, I made up my mind to just push straight ahead.
When I raised my right foot, ready to take the first step, the bush opened widely before my eyes. A quick panic struck my body as I gazed through the alive bush. It seemed to have a mind of its own. I felt fear coursing strongly through my veins as I entered the path that had opened in front of me.
Black. Nothing but darkness all around me. Afraid that something might jump out at me, I picked up my pace. I hoped there wouldn’t be anything to trip over in here. I couldn’t see a thing. Still running through the abyss and feeling like it would never end, I whined aloud.
“I’m never going to see light again!” And in that instant, I reached an end. I fixed my eyes on this huge white house that had fire protecting it. Coming out of the soft pillow-like bush, I began my way to the fiery gate. With every step I looked all around. The house was beautiful! It had gold trim around every post.
“Whoa!” I shouted. The fire split in two when I reached the gate. It seemed this house was alive as well. I stood there in front of the fiery gate that was inviting me through. Instead of walking through, I became weary and started to pace back and forth, asking myself if I should trust whatever this is. Would I get burned? What would I find beyond the fire? Was it evil?
So many questions popped into my head, like popcorn kernels when they get hot. It was starting to make me feel a little bonkers. Then I heard a small voice say, “Please, come in child.” It sounded like a man’s voice, but it was very faint so I could have been mistaken. I mustered up the courage to walk through the split fire of the gateway. “What?!This place is EXQUISITE!” I blurted excitedly.
I was standing in an astronomical number of red roses, tulips, lilies and carnations. Up ahead were all kinds of purple and white flowers I’d never seen before. The lawn was green with no trace of yellow or white in it. It was almost as if it had never been scorched by the burning hot suns.
The light which beamed over the house was different. I could see the huge rays of sunlight bursting through the puffy white clouds above, but no sky to hold them. It was quite an astonishing sight!
Making my way to the door, I saw children running and playing about, though they could not see me. Was I dead? Just then, I heard the voice again. “Please come in, Annalise.” Chills ran up my spine, causing me to shiver when I heard it speak my name. “Do not be afraid, dear one,” it said to me.
Still trembling, I lightly treaded through the threshold. “Yyy…yes…” I stuttered as I walked through this house that was beginning to look more like a palace. I saw diamonds, rubies, sapphires, ambers, topaz and so many more jewels!
This surely had to be a kingdom or something. As I approached a throne room, I saw odd people with trumpets and a weird-looking guitar that was solid gold. Everyone was uncontrollably joyful. Their grins were what was giving the throne room its light.
Then HE entered and everyone fell silent. A sudden warmth of peace swept through the air as he approached his throne. I was only able to see him for a moment before the brightest light surrounded him. The light was so bright I had to look away. Then it dawned on me… I’d seen this before… hadn’t I?
I heard an answer to the question in my head. Only this time it was gentle, and I wasn’t afraid. I crept up to him slowly, still unaware of who this gentle voice truly was. I had already met a fairy, unicorns, an ogre and a witch. I wasn’t taking any more chances.
“Oh… err… umm…” Could hear my thoughts as Fawn had been able to? His bright shine started to fade slowly as I approached him. He began to chuckle and said, “That is quite some inner voice you have going on in that little head.” I smiled, then giggled while nodding my head.
I couldn’t explain my feeling of worry to him. It didn’t seem like I needed to because he somehow already knew. “I know what you have been through, Annalise.” My eyes widened as I looked up at him. How did he know? Could he read my past thoughts? What was he? I had so many questions rolling over in my mind that I chuckled once again.
“Annalise. Annalise. Calm down dear child,” he said. A blank stare formed through my eyes as I realize yet again that he could hear what I was thinking. I took a long, deep breath and then let it out with a blurt, “How is this possible? You can hear me; Fawn can hear me. Are my thoughts not my own anymore?” I was beyond frustrated.
He simply smiled, then said to me, “Annalise, sweet girl, I’m sorry to tell you that your thoughts have never been your own.” My chin dropped as my mouth expanded and I suddenly felt myself looking like a cod fish. I started laughing uncontrollably. I was in shock as I wondered who else could hear my deepest thoughts. Then I was afraid again.
He reached for my hand in an attempt to comfort me. For a brief moment I felt peace. “Are you ready to hear why I’ve called you now? Are you ready to learn your purpose?” he asked softly. The peace I had just felt left my body. Darkness fogged over me and the feeling of fear blazed through me once more. I was about to be told my purpose, and I didn’t believe in myself enough to live up to it.
My chin dropped and my view was suddenly shifted toward my feet. “I am nobody to have a purpose, sir. I can’t possibly do anything you ask. I’m simply not good enough.” “My dear girl, I feel you may not be ready,” he said with disappointment in his voice. “I’m not, sir. And I don’t think I ever will be. I shouldn’t be chosen for such an amazing gift, because I would just make a mess of it.” “I see. Well, perhaps when you are ready, you can come find me again. I’ll be waiting patiently for your return, Annalise.”
Tears welled up in my eyes as my mind told me I would never been good enough. “Silence!” he shouted. “You have no power here! Be gone!” His loud roar startled me from my meltdown. I wondered who he was talking to. Nobody else was around except for those who adored him.
“Ok, child. It is time to go back from where you came.” Sadness sunk my heart. This was the safest I had ever felt, and I didn’t want to leave. “Remember me. Remember my voice and you will not be alone. For I am sorrowful to tell you, you do not know me and until you seek me, you will not find me. Annalise, do not forget me.”
That was the last thing I heard before everything went dark. It’s like I had entered a dark tunnel and there was no light at the end to see my way out. My heart was racing so rapidly. I began to feel light-headed and dizzy. My eyes started to flicker
; my body began swaying side to side. Before I could even try to take a deep breath, SMACK! I hit the ground. My eyes rolled back into nothingness and I laid there in a black hole. My thoughts disappeared as my mind drifted to deep silence.
CHAPTER 20
“Anna! Anna!” My eyes peeled open to the shouting of my name. Tailya and Starbeam were hovering over me with wide stares. I sat up slowly while rubbing the back of my neck, trying to piece together my last memory.
“Where have you been, Anna?” Starbeam asked. I could hear the stress in his voice, almost as if he had known already. Where had I gone? Tailya gazed deep into my eyes. It was really starting to feel a little creepy.
“Get away!” I shouted. I swatted at Tay like an annoying fly buzzing around. “Ouch! Anna, I think you got one of my wings!” Tay was turning orange and red in the face. It made me feel remorseful. I stuck my hand out for her to fly up on. She fluttered up to me and I said my apologies.
“Now, where were we?” Tay asked as she began deeply staring at me again. “Stop Tailya. You are freaking me out! I don’t remember anything and you staring at me isn’t helping my memory loss!” “Okay!” Tay shouted. “Hey, why are you two shouting at each other? I thought you were friends?” Starbeam was starting to lose it, so I jumped up and said, “No worries little one. We are just having a discussion. We’re best friends, right Tailya?” She looked at me with a coldness in her eyes I hadn’t seen before. We stared at each other for a few moments until she broke the stare with a wide smile and said, “We sure are, Anna.”
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