“To … overreact as far as being protective about it,” I continued. “We still have to do what we’re doing. I still have to work on this case. So I’d really appreciate it if you can know and also respect that I am going to continue with my normal activities at the same time. Respect my choices about this. And … maybe … not tell everyone else yet.” I looked at Andrew—Isaac was only rigid and silent anyway. “Jason knows.”
“He does?” Andrew cocked his head.
“He’s known for a while, I guess. So … maybe Kage is going to know soon but I’d rather not if we can avoid it. It won’t do anyone any favors to know right now.”
Andrew held up his hand at me as if to offer a platter, nodding at Isaac like, Duh?
I looked at Isaac and swallowed. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away. And thank you for being kind about listening and respecting my needs.” After a silence, I added, “Isaac? Are you okay?”
“What’s he supposed to do, darling?” Andrew sounded irritated. “You’ve just spelt out to him that he’s not allowed to say anything he’s actually thinking. He can’t even ask how you’re feeling or suggest you see a doctor—much less alternative uses for your immediate future.”
“I’m sorry, Isaac. I wanted you—”
“Sorry,” Isaac said at last, looking away to the door. He pressed a hand into his hair and left it there on top of his head. “You’re sorry…”
“I shouldn’t have told you with a list of rules and conditions. That wasn’t fair. What are you thinking?”
“I’m thinking you’re telling me about a miracle, a gift—” Dropping his hand and looking at me, his eyes anguished. “Do you know how rare this is? That we could be compatible is just…” Letting out a breath. “And you’re sorry?” He grabbed my hand. “Cassia, this … this is the best news anyone’s ever told me. And you’re feeling bad about it?”
“Not bad like that. Only about the timing and feeling bad about how I’m telling—”
“You noticed when he said ‘we’ he meant ‘you and I,’ right?” Andrew asked. “Not ‘you and the greater pack.’ Told you.”
“Andrew—” I gave him a frown.
Andrew threw up his hands from my feet. “Whatever. Don’t mind me. I’m just the servant girl. Wouldn’t want to come between the lord and lady of the manor…”
“Cassia, are you sure?” Isaac was staring at me, fixed on my eyes, turned to face me and very close. “How can you be certain?”
“It was only a strong hunch until the hospital. They checked on me after the fall, remember? They said the baby is fine.”
“Moon…” Isaac gasped and hugged me, crushing me to him, shaking. “Cassia, I can’t believe this. The doctor in Iceland said I wouldn’t be able to have children with a human. I thought … since I was half already, but he said I was essentially all wolf. Same odds.”
Andrew sighed very loudly. “Then you don’t think there might be a tiny chance it’s someone else’s success, snowy?” But he spoke under his breath and I don’t think Isaac had heard anything he’d said since the news anyway.
Isaac kissed me, holding onto my face, my shoulders, running his hands into my hair. His beard was rough and ticklish, his breath and hands warm, his lips healed. In seconds we were both laughing in a breathless, giddy way of teenagers. I’d never seen him like this, but I needed it, held onto his face in return, both hands, hardly noticing my sore arm anymore.
He kept saying he loved me in two languages, then Gaelic also. Then his mathematical mind was leaping ahead. “You’ll probably have a nine-month gestation, but could be eight without being too premature. That’s first of April or first of May. Beautiful times for birthdays.”
“Plenty of time for us to get our lives together, and safe,” I said. “What would you rather have? An Aries or a Taurus?”
“Either. She’ll be perfect no matter what, arä.”
“So I guess a girl… Skip next question. Why this automatic ‘she’ thing?”
“What?”
“You’ve known thirty seconds and you called the baby ‘she.’ Why?”
“Did I? We do that. In the pack. It’s hardly as if male births are not celebrated also. It’s just a little prejudice, I suppose. I have a feeling about this, though…”
“Thirty seconds—” I laughed. He was sounding like Zar, talking fast.
He kissed my neck. “Congratulations.”
“You too.”
Andrew sighed again. He got up. “Don’t mind me. I’ll just go back to the grieving rooms. As if you’ll notice. You two stay here in the nursery and make fools of yourselves.”
“No, Andrew—” I still laughed. “You don’t need to leave. You’re right. This is not a time to be celebrating.”
“Did I say that? First of all, I can’t remember the last time I saw you smiling, darling, so you get on with it. Bad things happen. That doesn’t mean you don’t have permission to enjoy the rare good thing. But, far more important, you’ll be doing me a favor by dismissing me at this point, Cassiopeia.” He left, shutting the door after him.
I sighed and leaned into Isaac again. “Thank you, Isaac. I love you so—what are you doing?”
He was removing my shirt. “Why do only Andrew and Jason know?”
“Because they’re the ones who figured it out. You’re actually the only one I’ve told. Can you keep the secret for a while? And I’ll—Isaac, I don’t know what you’re smoking but the time and place—”
“I love you, arä.” Mouth on my throat, he dropped my shirt on the foot of the bed and pulled off his own.
“Although … we came in here to change for bed anyway…” I held his face in both hands for another kiss, opening my mouth for him to explore.
He stood, keeping contact, so he was leaned over me to get his pants and underwear down, then sat back. I did the same.
The bra hooked in the front and Isaac opened it with one hand while I settled myself in his lap, straddling and facing him. Still, we hadn’t broken the kiss, but Isaac finally said, “Will you marry me?”
“I thought about that,” I admitted—not at all put out by the lack of one knee, etc. These were troubled times. “I need to stay in this country.”
“I know. Anything—”
“But there are other people involved in this relationship.”
“Whoever you want to spend time with, arä. With a child and legalities, though. I’ll take care of you. Make sure you’re secure here. Anything I can do.”
“I know you will, Isaac.” I guided him into me, holding on and slow at first, having to get used to him. “I’m not worried about that. I’m worried about the feelings of others. Group marriage is not legal around here. Actually … I haven’t looked it up. I’m just guessing…” I let out a breath as I lowered around him.
“There’s no need for it.” Isaac breathed sharply, kissing every bit of skin he found near his face. “If you’ll have me, that’s plenty in the eyes of the law, both to work on your case for staying and for the sake of the child—a legal father for … everything. School, medical, financial … for life.” Kissing as he went.
“When you’re arrogant it’s so practical and sensible, I love it. It’s the most endearing presumption I’ve ever known.”
“Is that a yes?” He caught his breath.
“Oh, Isaac, I would love to marry you. You must know that. But you know I can’t give you a personal promise like that right now. I’m loyal to five other people at the same time. Besides, this exact moment is only an escape to cling to each other in the midst of what I sincerely hope is the most trying and stressful time of our entire lives. In spirit a resounding yes, but I won’t make that promise to you, or anyone else, right now. All right?”
“Has someone else asked?”
“For a human-style marriage? No. You’re the first.” I couldn’t take him anymore, filling me while my eyes rolled back and I rocked my hips, savoring him.
“And the waterfall?” he asked.
“Yes, first also. I mean … not in my whole life, but … you know…”
“If only we’d known what we could create. Cassia, I had no idea. I’m so, so grateful. We’re so blessed…”
Our lips were together for a long moment before I could answer.
“I’m glad you believe there are powers beyond our normal senses watching over us.”
“I do.” He panted while I moved against him, arms around his shoulders. “I did before. But the instant I heard your voice after days and nights in black, fading from thirst, and you returned to us, brought light, that made it certain in a way I’d never felt before. Now, mere days later, I feel the same affirmation. Isn’t it odd how things come in waves?”
“Odd? I’m not sure that’s the word. You think that was it? That first night? In Germany? The waterfall? It always felt magical to me.”
“Of course I do. It’s a gift, arä. Whatever fate or Moon or God brought us together…”
“The faie took me back to that place in a vision. I have to find them again.”
“Do we need to go back?”
“No, only in my mind. That’s enough.”
“I’ll take you there.” He pressed his mouth to my throat, kissing down my windpipe, lifting at my ribs and turning where he sat.
I climbed off his lap, kissing him in return, at once regretting it. I felt empty and cold without him, needing his touch so much more than simply on my skin’s surface. I slid back on my side on the bed.
“You were on our clothes,” he said quietly. “I had my jacket.”
“That’s right, the bike jacket. And I was so hot, even at night after the climb to the falls, I soaked my feet in the water.”
“Your skin was silver in moonlight. So was your hair. You were like a spirit yourself, a kindred. Light and perfect. You asked if I’d ever been to a gym and I thought about the way our thoughts mirrored each other, you reading my body while I read yours.” He followed me as he spoke, moving over me the way he had that night, supporting his weight on both arms while he leaned down enough to kiss me.
“I loved the sound of the water,” I said. “How it felt like we were a part of the setting.”
Christmas music still played in the background, taking its place.
“I loved the smell of the mountains with your skin.” He kissed my lips, tasting.
I lifted my knees at his hips. He was wet from already being inside me and I stroked his shaft as I pulled him to me again.
“I can’t believe we didn’t know.” His voice sunk to a breath as he rocked forward, returning to me.
“We don’t…” I stopped. There didn’t seem any point in mentioning the other possible males involved. Isaac wasn’t blind. He was only … very sure of himself. “We’re blessed,” I said instead. “You’re sure it was that first night?”
“Don’t you? How far along did they say you are?”
“They didn’t. That wasn’t what came up. But it would be almost a month and a half then. That could be right.”
“You’ve had morning sickness, haven’t you?”
“Yes. Seems to be better. At least for a bit.”
“You should have told me. If there’s anything I can do for you…”
“I’ll let you know. But no. I’m all right. We just need to focus on our job.”
“We’ll look after you.”
“Thank you for saying ‘we.’”
“I enjoy pack life. Very much.” He held himself still, kissing me. “I love the Sable’s way of communal raising of pups. I’ve been blessed to be close to a few families myself. You can’t have too many people who are on call to help you. Only too few.”
“I like that approach.”
“Will the kindred come to you if you place yourself there? In spirit?” He was moving again, slow.
“I don’t know. I can look for them in a scry. I can feel that place now. Isaac? It’s okay. I’m close.”
“I love you, arä.” He brought us to a high together and I could see it with him: how it had been that first time—silver light, splashing water, fresh mountain night. And … I wasn’t certain. How could we ever be certain? Yet it seemed to me he was right. In our innocence, disbelief in the possibility of any consequences, positive or negative, our bodies had been ready to make their own magic and he’d impregnated me the first time we’d ever made love.
It was sentimental, no logical reason for it. Still, there was no logical reason for the “her/she” thing either and they had me on board with that without my consent. In the same way, twined together with him again, reliving a moment from our recent pasts, Isaac had me converted. Blissful in that one moment in our bubble around grief, certain of blessings and miracles and joy and love beating the odds.
Chapter 50
Kage lay on his back, gazing at the ceiling, holding Jason’s brutalized right hand. Jason lay on top of him, slid down so his head was on Kage’s bare chest, hair against Kage’s chin. His face was turned sideways toward me, eyes shut as he talked. I lay on my side, facing them, hand below the pillow, slightly propped up. Andrew lay along my back, spooning, arm around me, tucked in close right down to his feet.
The room was bright, the sun well up outside and the sky finally cleared from all the gray and rain showers. At least for a moment. The immediate forecast was not bright—although looked like it would clear again before long. Just in time for another week of summer before the autumnal solstice. Then … my birthday. September 25th.
We’d have them by then. This had to be over soon. We had to be safe by then.
I made myself a little vow to that effect while we lay there in bed, Jason and myself doing the talking, small sounds from Isaac and Gabriel already up in the living room and kitchen. Isaac had had other options but chose fur and the living room again while Zar and Jed were in the regular hotel room just downstairs. Communal living; yes. Bed sharing; no. How could this whole situation ever work out in the long run?
A perfect question to ask oneself after September 25th.
We didn’t tell—or make any effort to tell—every detail. We told Kage, and Andrew, for he knew little of the story as well, basically what had happened. The overall Paris visit and what Jason and I went through.
Kage had been distressed last night when his triumphant return had turned into grim tidings and Jason was inconsolable. Just as well it was bedtime and I encouraged him to curl up and simply stay with Jason. We’d talk later.
So the four of us had gradually ended up in bed. Now it was later, Jason was calm, and Kage listened in silence.
“Jason got us out of there,” I finished. “I had no idea how to do it. Even if I managed to move the trapdoor by magic, the mages would just come running down. There didn’t seem to be any way to actually reach the front doors. But Jason had the entire plan and we got out. Gabriel helped also. We would have been in trouble if he hadn’t been waiting on the doorstep, trying to figure a way in while we were figuring a way out. You know … I never asked how long he was out there.”
“What about now?” Kage asked. He kissed Jason’s hair. “Will they hunt us?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Didn’t get the impression they get out much, mate,” Andrew said.
“Once they had us there, they were perfectly happy to kill us, but it wasn’t like they wanted us bothering them in the first place,” I said. “We need to be extra careful anyway. Our whole approach. We’re going to stop talking with so many people, narrow our focus, be vigilant with warding and protective spells. A lot of changes as we move forward.”
“Where’s forward?” Kage asked.
Scratch, scratch at the door.
“Bugger off!” Andrew shouted.
“Andrew, please. All his things are in here.”
Andrew didn’t budge. “Whose fault is that?”
“Will you let him in?”
“You let him.”
“You’re on the outside.”
“But you don’t need to get
up to open a door.”
“Oh… Right…” I propped up to turn and look over Andrew’s shoulder, focus on the door, press back the latch inside.
It popped open.
“Don’t know why I have to think of everything around here…” Andrew muttered.
Isaac strode in. I knew him well enough to appreciate that seeing me in bed with others was not at all a comfortable experience for Isaac. This morning, though, he looked right at me, his ears down sideways on his head, eyes half-shut, tail wagging fast. It was a soppy wolf smile.
I jabbed a finger at him over Andrew. “Don’t look at me like that. Remember.” Pressing the finger to my own lips. Shhh.
“As if that lasted.” Andrew rolled his eyes.
Isaac still wagged. Still looked soppy. He made his snowdrift way into the bathroom, sniffing for his own things.
“Shut the door,” I said and lay back. “We need to get up anyway.”
Kage was talking with Jason, their voices only murmurs. He’d asked Jason how he was doing now, how he felt.
I elbowed Andrew and finally had to sit up to get him to move. “Go on. Give them a minute.”
By the time he and I were out of bed, Isaac was out of the bathroom. He kissed me in passing, still smiling. It was not like Isaac to go around smiling. Normally, when he did, it was much more his eyes. There was nothing subtle or Isaac-ish about this smile.
Even Andrew was giving him a funny look.
“Don’t—” I pushed him. “Is Gabriel hanging around again? Can we all talk? I need a shower but, if he’s leaving…”
“Go ahead. He doesn’t seem to be in any hurry.” Isaac kissed me again.
I went on for the bathroom, Andrew on my heels.
“Caramel doughnuts,” Isaac said as he walked out.
Andrew froze.
I looked around from the bathroom doorway, meeting his eyes, which were also frozen.
There was a beat.
“You’re having to think about that,” I said. “You were hoping to get in the shower with me and now you’re actually going to allow yourself to be lured away by the sweet promise of a caramel doughnut?”
He swallowed. “Perhaps you could help a wolf out, Belle? What are my odds with the whole shower situation?”
Moonlight Whispers: A Reverse Harem Shifter Romance (The Witch and the Wolf Pack Book 8) Page 34
