by C. E. Wilson
“It’s ok I’ll talk to Hunter later. It’s not that important. Thanks for the information, Steve. Do I need to come upstairs and sit with you and Carson?”
“Did Hunter tell you to?”
“No, I didn’t know he had left.”
“Then we don’t need you, do we?”
“Ok, if you do, just give me a shout, and I’ll be right up there.”
Steve snorted and turned and walked away. Justin shook his head. He was going to have a lot of work ahead of him just to make friends with Steve. He got off on the wrong foot with him, and it was going to take forever to remove that barrier.
Justin decided to look at Carson’s folder from the CPS and was shocked when he read it. It seems that Carson is more troubled than he thought he was. The report said that Carson tried to kill his father, but the gun jammed and would not fire. His father beat him so severely that he was in the hospital for a couple of weeks. Justin understood why Carson would feel that way, but he had to change his mind and let him know some things were not acceptable in his behavior.
So far, the two reports that he read was horrible. He wondered if all the boys had a similar history as Steve and Carson. He would have to take a couple of days and just study the reports with the notes from the other phycologist, although the notes were not much help. They made sense now that Justin had found his stash in the desk drawer.
Justin was putting the folders together with the CPS reports and the files from the other psychologist. Then he would add his own notes to the folders.
Hunter came bouncing down the stairs. “Steve said you wanted me.”
“I wanted to let you read Steve and Carson’s reports from the CPS. It doesn’t violate my doctor to the patient’s relationship since it is not between the boys and me. I just think you would do well to read them since you are over them. You can know why they might do the things they do. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah, it does, but right now, I can’t do it. I have to supervise dinner. How about after the boys go to bed, and we meet down here?”
“Yeah, that’s great. I have to think about what’s best for the boys, and I think this will help them in the long run.”
Hunter nodded. “I agree with you. Ok, it’s a date then. I mean, it’s not a date, but I’ll meet you here after the boys go to bed.”
Justin chuckled. “I wouldn’t mind if it was a date. I’ll meet you here after they go to bed then.”
Hunter blushed and went upstairs. Justin shook his head and started going through the next boy’s report. Justin got into the report and forgot the time. His phone rang, and he didn’t even look at the caller ID when he answered it. “Dr. Redmond.”
Hunter chuckled into the phone. “Dr. Redmond, your dinner is being served. If you want to eat, you need to come up now. It won’t last long.”
“Sorry Hunter I was engrossed in this report, and I didn’t even look at the caller ID. I’ll be right up.”
“Is that something I need to read too?”
“It sure won’t hurt. Since you are the guardian for the boys, this is as much your business as it is mine. I don’t know how these boys survived the treatments they had.”
“Oh, Justin, is it that bad?”
“Take the worst thing you can think of and multiply that by ten, and you might get close to what these boys have been through.”
“Come and eat, and then we’ll get one of the older boys to supervise the boys, and I’ll come down, and we can figure this out together.”
“It’s going to take us working together to get these boys somewhere near normal. See you in a moment.”
Justin hung up his phone and ran upstairs and sat down in his chair in the dining room. He needed Hunter to read the reports so he would know what they were dealing with, but Hunter loved each and every one of these boys, and he knew that knowledge was going to hurt Hunter very severely. He just couldn’t help it. He was serious when he said it was going to take both working with the boys to make them anywhere near normal.
The food wasn’t as good as it was the night before, but it was ok. They ate their dinner, and then Hunter told one of the seventeen-year-old boys to be in charge while he went downstairs to figure out some things with Justin. They walked down the stairs, and Justin picked up the first file and handed it to Hunter. “Brace yourself because this is going to hurt you, but I don’t see any other way to do it.”
“I’m fine. Whose is this? Oh, I see it is Steve’s report. Yeah, I’m sure this is going to hurt me. I love that boy.”
Hunter opened to the CPS report and started reading it. He shook his head and had tears in his eyes. He got to the part of the sexual abuse, and Hunter lost it. He started sobbing, so Justin got up and walked around the desk and pulled the report out of his hand and laid it on the desk. He pulled Hunter into his arms and held him while he sobbed.
Steve and Carson must have heard Hunter crying, so they raced down the stairs and got on either side of the two men. Steve stomped on Justin’s foot and demanded, “What did you do to Hunter?”
“Nothing, I was just comforting him. I wasn’t hurting him. You both need to go back upstairs. This doesn’t concern either of you.”
Carson glared at Justin. “You did something to him. Hunter never cries. Now you let him go and leave him alone, and I’m not going to tell you again.”
Hunter grabbed a couple of tissues from the desk and dried his eyes. “He isn’t hurting me. He’s telling the truth. He was comforting me. Now do what he said and go back upstairs and close the door up there.”
Steve and Carson stood there for a few moments and then walked back up the stairs. They slammed the door, and Justin chuckled. “They are protective of you, aren’t they?”
“You read the report. I don’t do anything like that to them, so why wouldn’t they want to protect me and want to stay here with us?”
“So far, what you read in the report for Steve is pretty common with the others I have read. These boys have already been through hell. I think any kindness will get that response. I don’t know how they have survived so far. I think I would have given up a long while ago.”
“How can I help my boys?”
“The first thing is I need to get them to trust me. You can help with that. Then we need to start going backward to what hurts them the most and get it out in the open and get them to talk about it. When that happens, your relationship with them will change, and you’ll be the one to give them comfort. You’ll need to hold them while they cry. Once we get to that point, they’ll start to heal. We’ll get them there.”
“What you’re telling me is that you’re going to break my boys in half, and then we put them back together. I hate that, but I understand that must be done. I just love them all so much, and I hate for them to hurt anymore. I get you, though.”
“So, you’re going to help me with them?”
“Yes, of course, I am. They are my boys, and I want them healthy. Who do you want to start with?”
“Which one will be the easiest to trust me?”
“I think that Simon will be the easiest. He’s sixteen and a sweet boy. Just a little shy. I’ll send him down here after school tomorrow.”
Justin walked around the desk and pulled Hunter in his arms and just stood there.
Chapter 5
Justin stood there, holding Hunter. Hunter wasn’t crying anymore, but it felt right to Justin to hold Hunter in his arms. Hunter nuzzled his face into Justin’s neck, then he froze. He pulled back away from Justin with a shocked look on his face. “What are we doing? This can’t happen, Justin. We are here for one thing, and that’s to take care of the boys and get them healthy and in a good place.”
“This has nothing to do with the boys. I find you very attractive, and I feel that we would be good together. I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same way. I promise not to touch you again.” Justin went behind his desk and sat down. He handed Carson’s file to Hunter, and he looked for Simon’s folder and opened it and
started to read.
Hunter kept glancing at Justin and got upset when he saw Justin clenching his jaw while he read the file. “Is it that bad, Justin?”
“Not really. His is the best one I have seen. At least he wasn’t abused as much as the others were. He was beaten, and that’s why he was taken from his family but not sexual abuse.”
“Oh, then your upset with me for rejecting you.”
“No, I’m not upset at all. If you don’t want me, that’s fine. I’m not going to push myself on you. We’ll keep things strictly business. I’m sorry I made advances that you didn’t welcome. Let’s get this done while the older boys are home for a change.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t want you. I do, but I just can’t do it in front of the boys. They are my first concern right now.”
“You don’t think they are mine? Maybe they would benefit from seeing a loving couple. They sure didn’t grow up with that. I’m not going to push anymore. If you decide you want me, then you know where I am. You’ll have to make the first move next time.”
Hunter hung his head and started rereading the file. His heart was hurting for the boys, and all they had been through. He glanced over at Justin and shook his head. He did want Justin, but he had to think of what the boys would think if they found out he was gay. He knew Steve would be upset with Hunter sleeping in his room if he knew Hunter was gay. As far as they know, he’s straight.
Hunter read a few more files then he laid them on the desk. “I have to go, and make sure the boys are getting ready for bed.”
Justin grunted and waved his hand and kept reading a folder. Hunter watched him for a few minutes, then turned and went upstairs. The boys were already getting ready for bed. Most had their showers and had their pajamas on and was watching a movie. “As soon as the movie is over then everyone in bed. Has everyone had their showers?”
Carson spoke up, “Yeah, except for Simon and Steve. They just went up to get their showers, then the older boys were waiting for you to come up and watch us so they could go.”
“Good. I’m very proud of you boys going ahead and doing what you knew you had to.”
Hunter sat down in a vacant chair and started to watch the movie so he could get into it. Carson kept staring at Hunter and making him feel uncomfortable. He turned to Carson. “What are you staring at me for?”
“You and Justin, huh? I didn’t see that coming. I figured you would want a flirty type. Justin is the opposite of what we expected you to be with. Are you sure you want Justin? I know a couple of guys that are more girly if that’s your thing.”
Hunter sat there with his mouth hanging open. He scanned the room, and all the boys were staring at him, waiting for his answer. “What do you mean, Carson?”
“Don’t play like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about what Steve and I walked into in the basement. I mean, it’s fine with us. We just didn’t expect it to be Justin. He looks like he’s straight.”
“What makes you think that I’m not straight?”
“Really, Hunter? Just the way you look at Justin is enough to say your gay. I don’t know why you don’t have the guts to say you’re gay to start with. We don’t care one way or the other. You will still be our Hunter.”
“You boys think you know everything. I was upset, and Justin comforted me. That’s all that happened.”
“Hunter, that might have been all that happened, but that’s not all you want to happen. We can all see it plain as day. If he is gay, then give him a chance. You know you want to.”
Hunter shook his head. “Watch the movie, and don’t worry about my love life. Have you done the homework I set for you and Steve to do this evening?”
“Of course, we did. We won't be watching a movie if we haven’t. We aren’t stupid.”
“I wasn’t sure you had time what with getting into my business like that. I thought maybe it took all your time this evening or something.”
“Nope, we finished before we came downstairs and caught you and Justin hugging on each other.”
“Carson, just stop. We weren’t hugging on each other. He had his arms around me, comforting me is all there was to it. Just let it be.”
Steve came downstairs, his hair still damp from his shower. “Hey, Hunter. How’s your boyfriend?”
Hunter rolled his eyes. “Don’t you start, Steve. He’s not my boyfriend. He’s a friend, and that’s all.”
“Carson is my best friend, and we don’t hug each other. So that doesn’t fly, Hunter.”
Hunter rolled his eyes again. “Steve, leave it alone, please. I don’t want to talk about it. He just isn’t my boyfriend. Simon, tomorrow when you get home from school, you’ll go downstairs and meet with Justin for a session with him. I don’t know what he’ll go over, but you’re going to be first.”
Simon frowned. “Why do I have to be the first one. I think Steve has more problems than I do, so why can’t he go first?”
“I said you are going to be first, so when we get home tomorrow, you head downstairs. He is going to talk to you, so just trust him. He isn’t here to hurt any of you.”
John said, “I don’t see why any of us have to go talk to him. He’s probably a drunk like the last one and will just make fun of us. I know I’m not going to talk to him and have him laugh at me.”
“Justin is not like the last one. He’s a really nice guy. He isn’t going to laugh at any of you, and he doesn’t drink, so we don’t have to worry about that playing out again. Anyway, the judge isn’t going to let you stay here unless you talk to Justin. He hired him, and you know he wants the best for all of you. So just do it, and it’ll be fine. I promise.”
When Hunter brought the boys home from school the next day, Simon went downstairs and sat in the chair across from Justin’s desk. Justin looked up and smiled. “Hi, Simon. How was school today?”
Simon shrugged his shoulders. “It was ok, I guess. I hate school and will be glad when I get old enough to quit.”
“What do you plan on doing for a living if you’re going to quit before you graduate?”
“I’ll go to work where most kids around here do. They all work at the grocery warehouse.”
“I tried to get a job there while I was still in school in the afternoons and weekends, and they told me that I have to have a high school diploma. So, I wouldn’t count on going to work there.”
“You’re just saying that, so I’ll stay in school. I know some guys that work there, and they didn’t graduate.”
“You don’t have to believe me. Get the phone book and look up the number and call them and ask them yourself. I wouldn’t lie to you about anything.”
“What do you want from me?”
“I just want to get to know you for now. What you like and dislike. Things like that. Eventually, I want to get into your childhood and see if we can erase some of the hurt for you.”
“I’ll make that easy for you. This is the first place I have ever lived that I don’t get beaten every day. From the time I can remember, I have been beaten. First, it was my dad, and when I got old enough to tell the teacher at school, they reported it, and I was put in foster care. That was as bad if not worse than I got at home. Finally, I was placed here by Judge Stone. I’ll always be grateful to Judge Stone and Hunter.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I just told you what it was like for me. If you have never been beaten every day of your life, then you’re not going to understand what I went through. You’ll never understand what any of us has gone through. You’ll play at understanding, but you can’t know what it was like.”
“I’m not going to say I understand, but it does help people when they talk about it and get it out in the open so you can deal with it and leave it in the past.”
“We just want to leave it in the past and start our future on a good note. Bringing that all up is just going to make it hurt again. Now we can pretend it never happened because we are here until we age out of the sy
stem. If you make us relive all that pain, it’s going to take forever to get over it again.”
“I think we need to talk about it, but it won’t be today, Simon. I just want to get to know you and gain your trust. I know the psychologist you had before was not an honorable man, and I want you and the other boys to know that I’m here to help you.”
Simon stood up and took off his shirt. He walked over to Justin and turned his back to Justin. Justin looked at it and gasped. He shook his head, and Simon glanced over his shoulder at Justin. “You think I need to be reminded of this? I see it every day. I see the way the boys at school look at me when I shower after football practice. You think I need to bring this out in the open so you can help me? Can you take the scars away so I can get a good woman when I get older? I don’t think you can help any of us. All the guys here at the house have the same back that I have.”
“I’m so sorry that happened to you, Simon. I don’t know what to do to help remove the scars. You could always get a nice big tattoo to cover them up. I can recommend someone for you. A friend of mine knows a doctor. How about if I get him to come over here and have him look and see if anything can be done with your back? Will you show it to him?”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. No doctor will want to touch my back, but the tattoo does sound good. See if you can talk Hunter into it. I bet you can’t. He doesn’t like to talk about our scars, and he’s not going to agree with you even if you are his boyfriend.”
“I’m not Hunter’s boyfriend. I wouldn’t mind being his boyfriend, but he told me no yesterday, so I haven’t bothered him since then. I’ll talk to him about the tat because I think it would make you feel better. If John says there is nothing we can do with your back, then I’ll talk to him. I’ll even pay for it.”
Simon stared at Justin for a few minutes with his head cocked to the side. “Are you serious? You’re really going to pay for the tat if you can talk Hunter into it? One that big is going to cost a few bucks.”
